monkeyhind@reddit
Wow. My guess was *way* off. lol
monkeyhind
How do you get a Mormon to question his sexuality?
Posted by Saskuatchisimo@reddit | Jokes | View on Reddit | 103 comments
How do you get a Mormon to question his sexuality?
Posted by Saskuatchisimo@reddit | Jokes | View on Reddit | 103 comments
monkeyhind@reddit
I'll admit I don't get the joke. Is this just about gender roles and which spouse does the dishes? Can someone explain it?
What did the cannibal say to the other cannibal?
Posted by International_Bee653@reddit | Jokes | View on Reddit | 39 comments
monkeyhind@reddit
Tony?
Cthulhu and his wife go for couples counselling
Posted by Prestigious_Bad_7646@reddit | Jokes | View on Reddit | 7 comments
monkeyhind@reddit
Dagonnit, enough with the puns!
Fighter pilot
Posted by Edward101075@reddit | Jokes | View on Reddit | 36 comments
monkeyhind@reddit
Same!
A devout cowboy lost his favorite Bible while he was mending fences out on the range.
Posted by nothinlefttochoose@reddit | Jokes | View on Reddit | 46 comments
monkeyhind@reddit
That's my favorite joke I've read on here in ages.
A good looking young guy watches an attractive woman at a bar for some time, then approaches her in a quiet, shy manner, and suggests they sit together, chat, and have a drink.
Posted by Upstate_Gooner_1972@reddit | Jokes | View on Reddit | 39 comments
monkeyhind@reddit
That's the punchline?
Javert's bakery opened today!
Posted by WJMorris3@reddit | Jokes | View on Reddit | 56 comments
monkeyhind@reddit
Euro not the only one.
I was telling my friend about this hot chick I've been seeing, she works for that big beer company.
Posted by kitskill@reddit | Jokes | View on Reddit | 121 comments
monkeyhind@reddit
Same, but now I'm questioning my entire life.
If a Vodka Soda with a splash of Cranberry is called a "Rose Kennedy" what's a "John Kennedy" ?
Posted by KentConnor@reddit | Jokes | View on Reddit | 61 comments
monkeyhind@reddit
You misunderstand my point. It's a poor joke because "dome" *isn't* a play on words. You might just as well have said "A shot, straight to the head."
A movie just came out about the last fertile man being in grave danger.
Posted by FearTheCheese203@reddit | Jokes | View on Reddit | 13 comments
monkeyhind@reddit
\* That movie really existed, for those who might be wondering. Or curious.
The police arrested my daughter claiming she had burnt our house down.
Posted by StockInitial4460@reddit | Jokes | View on Reddit | 37 comments
monkeyhind@reddit
I did! I have to wonder though if the joke is more apparent for people who pronounce "are" and "our" the same.
If a Vodka Soda with a splash of Cranberry is called a "Rose Kennedy" what's a "John Kennedy" ?
Posted by KentConnor@reddit | Jokes | View on Reddit | 61 comments
monkeyhind@reddit
Is "dome" a term associated with drinking in any way? Otherwise...
The police arrested my daughter claiming she had burnt our house down.
Posted by StockInitial4460@reddit | Jokes | View on Reddit | 37 comments
monkeyhind@reddit
Thanks. Like the other person said, now that I understand it, it's a pretty good joke.
The police arrested my daughter claiming she had burnt our house down.
Posted by StockInitial4460@reddit | Jokes | View on Reddit | 37 comments
monkeyhind@reddit
I admit that I still don't get it.
Children Suspect Their Mother is Having an Affair with a Celebrity.
Posted by Mijder@reddit | Jokes | View on Reddit | 25 comments
monkeyhind@reddit
Soon as I saw the name Pedro Pascal I guessed the punchline.
So a blind man walks into a strip club.
Posted by RevukaTheHe@reddit | Jokes | View on Reddit | 4 comments
monkeyhind@reddit
I'd say if you're planning on being a humorist, don't quit your day job.
What do you call a promiscuous woman that is mathematically inclined
Posted by Boring-Bathroom1166@reddit | Jokes | View on Reddit | 39 comments
monkeyhind@reddit
Never heard of "thot" before -- had to look it up.
I went to the doctor for my prostate exam.
Posted by bsbkeys@reddit | Jokes | View on Reddit | 35 comments
monkeyhind@reddit
I was having urinary issues and my PSA test was normal, so I assumed I had BPH (enlarged benign prostate). However, I went to see a urologist. He did a digital exam and knew instantly something was wrong. I feel like his "old school" test saved my life.
Marvin was walking through the state fair looking at the rides and attractions when he saw a huge sign on a tent proclaiming, "Come see The Magnificent Bob".
Posted by StarsBear75063@reddit | Jokes | View on Reddit | 36 comments
monkeyhind@reddit
Hat's off to it, then.
Marvin was walking through the state fair looking at the rides and attractions when he saw a huge sign on a tent proclaiming, "Come see The Magnificent Bob".
Posted by StarsBear75063@reddit | Jokes | View on Reddit | 36 comments
monkeyhind@reddit
>So of course he had to see if it were the same performer.
Sure, Marvin.
A woman storms into the police station, visibly agitated.
Posted by MoscuPekin@reddit | Jokes | View on Reddit | 56 comments
monkeyhind@reddit
For some reason I'm reminded of an old MAD magazine joke. Two cops show up at an old woman's house to answer a complaint. She's full of righteous indignation because she can see her neighbor parading around stark naked with his blinds open. The cop looks out the window and says "I don't see anything." She says "Of course not, you have to use the binoculars."
What Should You Do if Your Partner Starts Smoking?
Posted by TheGypsyThread@reddit | Jokes | View on Reddit | 41 comments
monkeyhind@reddit
First time I heard a variation of that joke was in National Lampoon magazine in the early 1970s.
Lots of people know that Charles Babbage invented the computer...
Posted by andybuxx@reddit | Jokes | View on Reddit | 28 comments
monkeyhind@reddit
Reddit's *Believe It or Not*
What kind of line did Elon Musk’s dad own?
Posted by DM_ME_CHARMANDERS@reddit | Jokes | View on Reddit | 4 comments
monkeyhind@reddit
Sorry, DM... you messed up the set-up.
"Therefore," said the minister, "if anyone knows why these two may not lawfully be joined in Holy Matrimony, you must now speak, or else forever hereafter hold your peace."
Posted by Gil-Gandel@reddit | Jokes | View on Reddit | 27 comments
monkeyhind@reddit
I was going to suggest "Mini"
What's the difference between a small boy and a bag of cocaine?
Posted by Talory09@reddit | Jokes | View on Reddit | 105 comments
monkeyhind@reddit
>Think what you like...
... while it's still legal.
Elon Musk's gaming stream proved that there is at least one thing he's very gifted at.
Posted by epiquinnz@reddit | Jokes | View on Reddit | 41 comments
monkeyhind@reddit
Sorry if my comment seemed ignorant, I hadn't seen the story about Elon's gaming substitute until after I posted.
Elon Musk's gaming stream proved that there is at least one thing he's very gifted at.
Posted by epiquinnz@reddit | Jokes | View on Reddit | 41 comments
monkeyhind@reddit
I'm not sure I got it. Is it a play on the word "right" as in right wing?
Amazon has started a new dating service, based on meeting people who buy the same things you do on Prime.
Posted by winkelschleifer@reddit | Jokes | View on Reddit | 54 comments
monkeyhind@reddit
Maybe you're the one who got whooshed.
They say that 1 man in 10 is gay.
Posted by CokedUpAvocado@reddit | Jokes | View on Reddit | 164 comments
monkeyhind@reddit
1 man in 1 *is* pretty gay. 1 man in 10 is an orgy.
I hope that I die peacefully in my sleep like my grandfather.
Posted by richardelmore@reddit | Jokes | View on Reddit | 28 comments
monkeyhind@reddit
"Bus driver" is also acceptable.
What do you call a cheap circumcision?
Posted by No_Coach_3360@reddit | Jokes | View on Reddit | 59 comments
monkeyhind@reddit
This joke made my penis involuntarily retract
Why was the anti-vaxxer‘s 4 year old child crying?
Posted by Reecethehawk@reddit | Jokes | View on Reddit | 145 comments
monkeyhind@reddit
It has been a while since I read a joke that was so dark. Congratulations?
Why do software developers like Python so much?
Posted by greedydita@reddit | Jokes | View on Reddit | 29 comments
monkeyhind@reddit
Why do pythons like software developers so much?
Why don’t blind people bungee jump?
Posted by Hervey_Copeland@reddit | Jokes | View on Reddit | 12 comments
monkeyhind@reddit
Oh, **their** dogs! Their own guide dogs. Derp. Took me too long to figure out.
I tried to buy something in a novelty store, and the owner said "show me your nipples".
Posted by EH4LIFE@reddit | Jokes | View on Reddit | 4 comments
monkeyhind@reddit
Yeah, maybe the set-up should be "I tried to get a good deal at a tattoo parlor... "
Adam Lee was born to a Family in Hong Kong
Posted by EastlyGod1@reddit | Jokes | View on Reddit | 12 comments
monkeyhind@reddit
I liked the line "as normal a life as an anthropomorphic deer could do" but even for a shaggy dog joke the punchline was kind of a letdown.
My favorite sex position is the JFK
Posted by Jack_Torrance_91@reddit | Jokes | View on Reddit | 145 comments
monkeyhind@reddit
Is the fact that he was Jewish pertinent? It never occurred to me to wonder what about his religion.
My favorite sex position is the JFK
Posted by Jack_Torrance_91@reddit | Jokes | View on Reddit | 145 comments
monkeyhind@reddit
We had that issue!
Why are so many monks and friars fat?
Posted by TargetOfPerpetuity@reddit | Jokes | View on Reddit | 14 comments
monkeyhind@reddit
Pretty good joke if you just made it up!
Doctor: your BMI is way too high
Posted by dandan_56@reddit | Jokes | View on Reddit | 23 comments
monkeyhind@reddit
Both are true! How can that be?
Can Tom Cat carry five gallons of gasoline?
Posted by Gil-Gandel@reddit | Jokes | View on Reddit | 16 comments
monkeyhind@reddit
Okay, but if you do a search for "jerry can" in the U.S., you get links to cans identified by how many gallons they hold, i.e., 5.3 gallons.
Hey Girl…
Posted by -fmvs-@reddit | Jokes | View on Reddit | 11 comments
monkeyhind@reddit
Hehehe, look at this country...U-R-Gay
What does Lord of the Rings and Brokeback Mountain have in common?
Posted by Gerry1of1@reddit | Jokes | View on Reddit | 9 comments
monkeyhind@reddit
Both were based on previously published writings and featured beautiful scenes of nature?
Did this hold up? Loved it as a kid but it's been a minute since I've watched it.
Posted by Superfist01@reddit | Xennials | View on Reddit | 330 comments
monkeyhind@reddit
I watched it recently and thought the same thing! I don't think it was well-regarded when it came out, but it has improved with age.
ULPT Request: what can be done about the literal Nazis out in front of disney world
Posted by theyellowpants@reddit | UnethicalLifeProTips | View on Reddit | 2461 comments
monkeyhind@reddit
>I already know
"Totally not generalizing" to quote someone above
ULPT Request: what can be done about the literal Nazis out in front of disney world
Posted by theyellowpants@reddit | UnethicalLifeProTips | View on Reddit | 2461 comments
monkeyhind@reddit
>rightfully
lol
A gorilla walks into a bar in Manhattan
Posted by edfitz83@reddit | Jokes | View on Reddit | 204 comments
monkeyhind@reddit
Is the actual joke that it's an ancient joke with a bunch of extraneous details added?