A girl asked me over for a hot date. I was taking her from behind, and she yelled, “Hurt me! Hurt me!”

Posted by edfitz83@reddit | Jokes | View on Reddit | 6 comments

So I told her I accidentally ran over her cat when I was pulling into her driveway.

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6 Comments

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Diannika@reddit

as a note on your edit, yes I guess? running over cats happens a lot more irl, so hits people more as a bad thing that they can see happening rather than a punchline. using a large dog in its place (making it less likely to occur irl cuz it's easier to see) might go over better. I personally don't think it's funny either way, tbh, but if you want to keep it as close to what it is now as possible, saying "i ran over your great dane" would be better

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edfitz83@reddit (OP)

Perhaps people are not appreciating dark humor these days. If I said something about running over her Great Dane, this would turn into a joke about having a Cybertruck, where the Great Dane won.

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KidKilobyte@reddit

She asked for 12” and make it hurt. So I poked her 4 times with 3 and hit her with a rock.

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edfitz83@reddit (OP)

It’s pretty funny how hit or miss this sub can be. I posted a very similar joke a few years ago, and it damn near made the front page.

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mordecai98@reddit

That's a bit different from the Jimmy Carr Donkey Punch.

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EmbarrassedRisk2109@reddit

And that's when the pussy turned into a wild cat.