Bartender says "What? Grapes? No, this is a bar, not a fruit store. Get out, duck"

Next day the duck comes back, "Got any grapes?"
Bartender says "Dammit duck, I told you to get out. Quit coming here asking for grapes or I'm going to nail your beak to a barstool.

Next day the duck comes back, "Can I borrow a hammer?"
Bartender is furious, "What's with you duck? Does this look like a hardware store? It's a bar! I don't have any hammers here!"

Duck grins, "Good. Got any grapes?"