Tell this to Santa please
Posted by Prashantt1@reddit | Jokes | View on Reddit | 28 comments
On Christmas morning a cop on horseback is sitting at a traffic light, and next to him is a kid on his brand new bike.
The cop says to the kid, “Nice bike you got there. Did Santa bring that to you?”
The kid says, “Yeah.” The cop says, “Well, next year tell Santa to put a tail-light on that bike.” The cop then proceeds to issue the kid a $20.00 bicycle safety violation ticket.
The kid takes the ticket and before the cop rides off says, “By the way, that’s a nice horse you got there. Did Santa bring that to you?”
Humoring the kid, the cop says, “Yeah, he sure did.” The kid says, “Well, next year tell Santa to put the dick underneath the horse, instead of on top.”
Sweaty_Kid@reddit
this made me so mad that the cop ruined the child's Christmas.
BY WHAT RIGHT??
Prashantt1@reddit (OP)
The child gave him back perfectly.
Dragoness42@reddit
It would only be "perfectly"if the sick burn could come with a fine that had equivalent financial and emotional impact.
secretprocess@reddit
The cop was so shaken by the kid's sick burn that he couldn't sleep all night, ended up missing work and getting fired, lost his wife and died alone and homeless under a bridge surrounded by horse shit.
Better?
TheMadDruid@reddit
I don’t think it’s a true story.
MrKomiya@reddit
Qualified Immunity
Mathgailuke@reddit
Acab, amirite?
JoeDiesAtTheEnd@reddit
The kid was found with two broken arms and a gunshot wound in the back of the head. Cop claims he 'was resisting'. Body cam was malfunctioning at the time.
Due-Tap708@reddit
i didn't understand the punchline. I'm reading it to be literal. Can someone explain
Mistral-Fien@reddit
The kid was making a snide remark about the cop being a dick (bona fide asshole of a person).
Due-Tap708@reddit
Either sounds like he's saying santa should copulate with the horse instead putting the cop on the horse or the cop should be dicked by the horse instead of being a dick
inerlite@reddit
I guess English is not your first language?
tekpixels@reddit
kid said the cop was the "dick" meaning asshole (dick on the horse), and there was no dick under the horse (horse was a female)
sfgf27@reddit
I imagined it was a female horse (no penis aka dick) and dick = asshole in western culture.
HospitalQuiet619@reddit
"Well boss I sh0t the kid in self defence"
Uncal_Thal@reddit
He wouldn't stop resisting.
Mistral-Fien@reddit
Then the cop says "Did you just try to grab my gun?" :O
arslan70@reddit
Must be a black kid.
gsfgf@reddit
If the kid was Black, the cop would have arrested him for theft by receiving for “stealing” Santa’s bike.
MrKomiya@reddit
“Two shots in the dark, now Huey’s dead”
satec77@reddit
Horse caught a stray for no reason lmao
JackB39@reddit
It would also work with the kid saying, "Tell Santa to put the ass on the back, instead of on top."
unusual_replies@reddit
One asshole per horse
Pretend-Conflict4461@reddit
The horse doesn't have a tail light either....
rayray2xgmail@reddit
Hahaha 😂
Odd-Slice-2155@reddit
that's merely a (knight) mare
genxindifferance@reddit
Not too bad. I liked it. I'll allow it.
origvani@reddit
what goes around comes around hehe