Whats your best joke ?
Posted by AccidentEvening8333@reddit | Jokes | View on Reddit | 21 comments
On our one year anniversary i asked my gf if we could ya know try the other hole . She ahh babe you know im not tryn to get pregnant
maxhvac@reddit
My life.
Asian_wife_finder@reddit
Jesus walks into a bar and says, “I’ll have a glass of water.”
DeepLeek27@reddit
Why did Jesus cross the road?
DeepLeek27@reddit
Somebody nailed him to a chicken.
BriskandBeefyWind@reddit
The chicks go wild for jesus. They heard he is well hung.
BlueManQuad@reddit
Did you hear about the two blondes who drove to Florida for vacation?
When the got to the outskirts of Orlando, they saw a large sign over the highway that read “DisneyWorld - Left”
Sooo… they turned around and went home!
Andthenwefarted@reddit
Your mommas so fat, during a full moon she turns into a were-house.
summit-or-nuffin@reddit
Man goes to doctor - and says every day, I have the same routine, I have to make love to my wife, b4 we get up, when she goes down stairs I creep in the aupairs room, and we make love, then I go down stairs for some breakfast, and again I make love to my wife, then I go to work, and f the secretary, then at lunch I meet up with my mate, and we go back to his office, and I end up fing his secretary, at the end of the day, I get in the door and make love to my wife again, and then when when we go to bed, we do it again. This happens pretty much every day The doctor says so what's the problem And the man says - well, it hurts when I w**k
mrcapmam1@reddit
A woman bursts into the hardware store and says "where are the "D" cell batteries at ? the guy behind the counter indicates with his finger to follow and says come this way to which she says if i could cum that way i wouldnt need the batteries
1LuckyTexan@reddit
How do we know Steve Irwin didn't use sunscreen?
Because it blocks the harmful rays.
crash866@reddit
Your Mom!
Waste-Job-3307@reddit
That's your "best" joke?
Cultural-Company282@reddit
You should hear his worst joke.
It's about a German sausage.
Quick_Razzmatazz1862@reddit
That sounds like a wiener to be quite frank
hekofit@reddit
What do a virgin and a sneeze have in common?
Goesintight!
Iffy50@reddit
Two blonds are walking in the woods and they come across some tracks. One says they are deer tracks, the other says that they are moose tracks. As they were arguing the train hit them.
Grimol1@reddit
A blonde walking along a river trying to find a way to cross and she sees another blonde on the other side of the river so she yells to her “how do I get to the other side?” The other blonde looks at her and says “you’re on the other side.”
Cold_Table8497@reddit
Lawyer: I'm sorry Mr Mouse but I don't think that Minnie having buck teeth is suitable grounds for divorce.
Mickey: I never said she had buck teeth, I said she was fucking goofy.
secondattemptforsure@reddit
What did one tampon say to the other?
Nothing, they were both stuck up cunts.
(Not mine originally)
AccidentEvening8333@reddit (OP)
Breaking news : national tampon shortage due to all the pussies in DC
LickMyTasteez@reddit
A couple from Earth and a couple from another planet arrange to swap wives for the weekend. The alien wife stays on earth with the human husband while his wife goes with the alien husband to his planet.
After a bit of sight seeing, they go to his place and take off their clothes in hus bedroom. He's rather small, and he sees the disappointment on her face.
He then takes on finger, sticks it in his ear and swirls it around, and his member lengthens. He takes a finger and sticks it in his other ear and makes a circle, and he gets more girth. He and the human wife have some very satisfying sex.
Late Sunday night the alien husband drops her off back on Earth and leaves with his wife. The human wife casually asks her husband how his time with the alien wife went.
"It was okay I suppose," he replies," but the entire time we were having sex she kept playing with my ears."