Eye drops
Posted by WolfmanSG@reddit | Jokes | View on Reddit | 19 comments
Taken from me Facebook feed.
A doctor wanted to get off work and go hunting, so he approached his assistant.
“Seamus, I am going hunting tomorrow. I don’t want to close the clinic. I want you to take care of the clinic and take care of my patients.”
“Yes, sir!” – answers Seamus.
The doctor goes hunting and returns the following day and asks: ”So, Seamus, how was your day?”
Seamus told him that he took care of three patients.
“The first one had a headache so I gave him Tylenol.”
“Bravo, and the second one?” – asks the doctor.
“The second one had stomach burning and I gave him Malox, sir.” – says Seamus.
“Bravo, bravo! You’re good at this and what about the third one?” – asks the doctor.
“Sir, I was sitting here and suddenly the door opened and a woman entered. Like a flame, she undressed herself, taking off everything including her bra, her panties and lied down on the table. She spread her legs and shouted: “HELP ME! For five years I have not seen any man!”
“ Thundering’ Lard Jayzus, Seamus, what did ye do?” – asks the doctor.
“I put drops in her eyes.” !!!!!
scr1bbl3@reddit
Bold move leading with the punchline
SerDankTheTall@reddit
I think all posts in this sub should be required to lead with the punchline.
They should also be required to have a line at the end where one of the characters laughs at how amusing the situation is.
Own-Willow-2865@reddit
"and then everyone laughed" at the end of every joke would be a nightmare and I'm here for it
Jokeminder42@reddit
Laughing is good. Fainting is even better.
Own-Willow-2865@reddit
"bold move leading with the punchline" – bro just wanted to save us all some scrolling time. respect
Only_Ad7715@reddit
At least he is true to his profession
cloud1445@reddit
Why did you make them Irish, and why did you make an Irish doctor go hunting? Fishing would be more realistic.
Tigweg@reddit
You've really got the hang of r/jokes
cloud1445@reddit
Good jokes ring true.
sdarkpaladin@reddit
Hence
trebityblebity@reddit
Yea we also don't have Tylenol here and I'm guessing malox is some sort of heartburn medicine?
If he'd said Anadin and Rennie's, and refered to them as pants instead of panties, he'd have really sold the joke more authentically.
wvmusicmaster@reddit
It's Maalox, a popular brand in the US for heartburn. I recall an ad that used the phrase "It's a Maalox moment".
toxcrusadr@reddit
Knickers? Or is that just the English?
sonofaresiii@reddit
World building
Lily-FrostedLily@reddit
LMAO dude, Seamus is out here playing 5D chess while the rest of us are playing checkers. I've tried nothing and I'm all out of ideas!
Roku-Hanmar@reddit
Bot
ktka@reddit
What an idiot! A sane person would have sold her clothes.
heygiraffe@reddit
Nice.
For future reference: don't put the punchline in the post title.
Mysterious-Path-2128@reddit
The doctor returned to find the clinic somehow still licensed.