Walking through the woods……..
Posted by MercyReign@reddit | Jokes | View on Reddit | 33 comments
Two guys are walking through the woods one day when they stumble across a big deep hole.
The first guy peers into it and says, “Wow! That looks deep.”
The second guy says, “It sure does. Let’s throw a few pebbles in there and see how deep it is. We’ll be able to tell the depth by how long it is before we hear the noise of the pebbles landing.”
So they pick up a few pebbles and throw them in and wait. Nothing. There’s no noise.
The first guy says, “Jeeez. That is really deep. I know, let’s throw one of these great big rocks down there. Those should make a noise.”
So they pick up a couple football-sized rocks and toss them into the hole and wait… and wait… Again, nothing.
They look at each other in amazement. Then the first guy gets a determined look on his face and says, “Hey, over here in the weeds, there’s a railroad tie. Help me carry it over. When we toss that sucker in, it’s gotta make some noise.”
So the two of them drag the heavy tie over to the hole and heave it in. Once again, not a sound comes from the hole.
Suddenly, out of the nearby woods, a goat appears, running like the wind. It rushes toward the two men, then right past them, running as fast as it’s legs will carry it. Suddenly it leaps in the air and into the hole.
The two men are astonished with what they’ve just seen and look at each other in amazement.
Then, out of the woods comes a farmer who spots the men and ambles over. He asks them, “Hey, you two guys seen my goat out here?”
The first guy says, “You bet we did! Craziest thing I ever saw. It came running like crazy and just jumped into this hole and disappeared!”
“Nah”, says the farmer, “That couldn’t have been my goat. My goat was chained to a railroad tie.”
spleefmaboff@reddit
8!
DragonsAndSaints@reddit
I don't get it
Easyletter19@reddit
Heard this from my high school sweetheart’s stepfather. Apparently it is a joke of Norwegian origin.
Ron, if it's you, hope all is well.
MercyReign@reddit (OP)
I’m not Ron 😂
Adhar_Veelix@reddit
You are now. Better get used to it.
MercyReign@reddit (OP)
In that case, call me Ronalda
Adhar_Veelix@reddit
Only thing I can imagine there is a female Ron Swanson
Fair-Ad-5852@reddit
Rhonda
According_Turn_3473@reddit
Help me
mosquitohater2023@reddit
That sounds like something a Ron would say.
aBeerOrTwelve@reddit
Why is everybody standing around doing nothing when Ron is missing!?
fyrdude58@reddit
Didja check in the hole?
orangeineer@reddit
Ron was always good at finding people. You should ask him to look.
BasilHaydensBitch@reddit
And curiously, something Not Ron would say as well.
Woody_L@reddit
Yeah, it's definitely Ron. Wassup bro?
Key-Marketing-3145@reddit
Can confirm. I'm the real Ron.
kmbxyz@reddit
No, you couldn't be Ron. Ron was chained to a railroad tie
TheMcPenguin@reddit
Classic Ron.
DeadOnTheTrident@reddit
Ron't
BeDoubleNWhy@reddit
still hoping all is well 🙂
Buck1961hawk@reddit
Nah. It was just a hole.
Southern_Ad_5724@reddit
This scenario played out in the film " hear my song". Cow replaced the goat. Cute film if you have never seen it, Ned Beatty in the lead role.
Waitsfornoone@reddit
Farmer Johnson was caught by his neighbor having sex with his goat.
She called the authorities and had him arrested. Farmer Johnson was very concerned and asked one of his buddies if he knew a good lawyer. The friend said that he knew a lawyer that wasn’t a good trial lawyer, but, he was extremely talented at picking jurors.
On the day of the trial the neighbor was asked what she had witnessed. She said, “I looked out my kitchen window and I saw Farmer Johnson behind his goat having sex with her. When he finished, he walked around to the front of the goat and the goat licked his penis clean!”
Just then, one of the jurors leaned into another juror and said, “you know, a good goat will do that!”
howgreenwas@reddit
Best jokes are in the comments!!!
Here’s one I’ve got:
A woman is driving along a country road,and sees a man on a hill, screwing a sheep. She is horrified and stops at the nearest farmhouse to call the authorities (obv an old joke). A boy answers the door and she says, “young man, I need to use your phone to call the police!!” He said, “Why, what happened?!” She said, “I saw a man, well, I don’t want to say what he was doing.” Then she looked out the window and saw the man walking towards the house. “That’s him!” “Oh, well, that’s my daaaaaaaaaaad!”
HappyFamily0131@reddit
First joke from this sub that's actually made me bust up laughing. Been coming here almost 6 years.
Constant_Bake5501@reddit
Need something to cheer you up?
Bubble wrap!
uemusicman@reddit
Thanks! You are amazing too.
thelocalleshen@reddit
thanks bae <3
LaserPanzerWal@reddit
...and your phone is dead. Out of the corner of your eye you spot him...
ktka@reddit
Is magma a bad heat source to cook goat?
wellAssert12@reddit
F
Background-Drink-380@reddit
I’ve always heard this told as a true story of two cavers trespassing to check out a pit on the farmers land; nice to see such an exact retelling after so many years (( I think it may have been published once in CAVE magazine put out by NSS))
erraticoscines901@reddit
Whoosh!