A woman decided to celebrate her 70th birthday by treating herself to one night in a very nice hotel. The next morning, when she went to check out, the desk clerk gave her a bill for $250. She was shocked and asked why it was so expensive. “I agree it’s a nice hotel, but the room isn’t worth $250 for just one night — I didn’t even have breakfast,” she said. The clerk explained that $250 was the standard rate, and breakfast was included if she had chosen to have it.

She asked to speak with the manager. The manager came out, already informed about the complaint, and said, “Our hotel has an Olympic-sized swimming pool and a large conference center that guests can use.”

“But I didn’t use them,” she replied.

“Well, they are available, and you could have used them,” he answered.

He continued, saying the hotel also offered famous in-house shows with top entertainers from around the world.

“But I didn’t attend any of those shows,” she said.

“They are available, and you could have gone,” the manager repeated.

Every time the manager mentioned another facility, she answered, “But I didn’t use it,” and he kept giving the same reply.

After several minutes of going back and forth, and seeing that the manager would not change his mind, she agreed to pay. She wrote a check and handed it to him.

The manager looked at it and said, “Madam, this check is for only $50.”

“That’s right,” she said. “I charged you $200 for sleeping with me.”

“But I didn’t do that!” the manager replied.

“Well,” she answered calmly, “I was here, and you could have.”