Told the wife she drew her eyebrows too high,

Posted by TomKarelis@reddit | Jokes | View on Reddit | 12 comments

She looked surprised. . .

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Klotzster@reddit

Bought my wife a refrigerator

Her face lights up every time she opens it

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Professional-Face-97@reddit

After hearing this remark she may stuff you in the refrigerator in the cold and dark. I once made this mistake of giving my wife a fancy vacuum cleaner. 🙄

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BeMoreKnope@reddit

I told her she put on some nice rouge on her cheeks…

She blushed.

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ForsakenEmu3298@reddit

My wife loves being cold.

No more blankets and cuddles for her. -_-

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Jerdogg23@reddit

I don’t have a wife, one night stands are cheaper and you’ll live longer

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KaraAliasRaidra@reddit

"...you’ll live longer." Eh, that depends on whether the one-night stand's husband comes home early.

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dave_is_afraid@reddit

Don’t care for her demeanor

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oxiraneobx@reddit

Uncle Leo?

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Ok_Revenue1696@reddit

My wife said she was "feeling hot" this evening.

I told her to close the oven door.

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Inside_Guava_5482@reddit

That’s an eye-opener

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Shrikarrr@reddit

Bone aching juice

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humperty@reddit

Surprised my wife by getting romantic and exotic.

First time I beat her at Scrabble.