My Keyboard is sinking

Posted by OutlawCecil@reddit | talesfromtechsupport | View on Reddit | 26 comments

I work in a small IT office with just 3 techs, me being one of them.

Honest to God, we got a call a while back that our office will never forget. We joke about it all the time. A customer called and wanted to know if we can install a new keyboard for him because, and I quote "my keyboard is sinking". We tried to get more information from him but he said he simply couldn't explain it, his keyboard just stopped working and needs replaced. We visited, and found one fist-sized dent right in the middle, where keys were smashed and yeah, the keyboard was beyond dead. Quietly, we simply agreed his keyboard needed replaced and replaced it for him. Remind me not to make this guy angry in the future...

[-]

JaschaE@reddit

And that's why german IT tradeschool has sports classes. If you can dodge a car you can dodge a users fist.

[-]

ontheroadtonull@reddit

"My keyboard is sinking."

"What is it sinking about?"

[-]

P5ychokilla@reddit

Sank you vey much !

[-]

LeahInShade@reddit

This is one of the videos of all times that I share the most with anyone I can!

[-]

Dougally@reddit

German coastguard

[-]

MiniBassGuitar@reddit

Haha I love that ad

[-]

Nezrite@reddit

"How nice sings used to be."

[-]

CommarderFM@reddit

My school had a too small gymnasium and they cut the classes from the ones where sport was deemed most unimportant (IT). I'd argue we're the ones where it would be needed the most...

[-]

JaschaE@reddit

An hour of sports per month will not have a positive impact tbh. Will have to learn to dodge a wrench on your own...

[-]

PancakeProfessor@reddit

If you can dodge a wrench, you can dodge a ball.

[-]

ApplicationHour@reddit

You all look like a bunch of _______ trying to ____ a doorknob!

[-]

P5ychokilla@reddit

Is he on Twitch?

[-]

KnaprigaKraakor@reddit

I used to work on the trading floor of a bank, where more than half of the users in the room had specialised Bloomberg keyboards.

Those things are built like tanks. Sure, there are plastic caps covering the keys, but the body is metal, and not just thin aluminium sheet, either. Rugged design, highly durable quality all around.
As soon as you see the way some of the users using them, you understand why.
A high pressure environment; stressed users; prices moving a couple of fractions of a penny in the wrong direction, and then a bit of network lag or a background process terminating unexpectedly, that prevents a trade being made and which costs a few million... the user just might find a baseball bat and start swinging at the keyboard... or they might swing the keyboard and hit the desk.
Keys can fly 10 or more meters.
Bloomberg replace the keyboards, no questions asked. Sometimes 2 or 3 per day.

So yeah, a keyboard as a stress-relief toy is a wonderful idea 😄

[-]

jandienal@reddit

See, somebody should have talked to IT. They have plenty of old printers lying around that they would happily supply, with a barrel of bats, just so that they would know the printers would finally get what they deserve.....

[-]

Distribution-Radiant@reddit

PC Load Letter? The fuck does that mean?

[-]

Distribution-Radiant@reddit

Bloomberg replace the keyboards, no questions asked. Sometimes 2 or 3 per day.

Holy shit. But with how much they charge to lease those systems, I doubt a few keyboards is making a remote dent in their profits.

!the terminals and keyboards start at \~$24,000 per year, and have to be leased, per wikipedia!<

[-]

spazcat@reddit

I watched a guy that worked for me abuse his keyboard daily. Eventually it quit working and I asked IT to replace it (I was not IT at this employer, but I was a manager on a tech support contract). This guy was great at his job, but kept getting frustrated and killing keyboards, so I worked it out with IT that they would just keep replacing his keyboard with the crappy ones that came with our PCs instead of the nicer ones most people get so that I could keep him as an employee and not have an issue with the equipment problems. They agreed to this because it helped them get rid of the crappy keyboards laying around. This continued after I was no longer his manager, all the way until the call center closed.

[-]

JustSomeGuy_56@reddit

I was implementing a system that would automate a warehouse. The workers knew that as soon as we went live, about half of them would lose their jobs. (Or as management sold it “become free to pursue other interests”.) One morning the overnight problem report said “all work stations inoperable”.

We went out on the floor to the row of PCs and each had the keyboard embedded through the monitor screen. No one had any idea what happened.

[-]

Cakeriel@reddit

Sounds like a good way to go from 50% labor reduction to 100%.

[-]

trro16p@reddit

Should have offered to get him this Enter Key.

I know OIT departments should at least offer it to Helpdesk workers or Admins.

[-]

Ich_mag_Kartoffeln@reddit

Do they also have an "Any" key available?

[-]

MrRemj@reddit

I worked with a guy who had frustration issues - the public, management, employees - people were just all too much.

The phones were the victim - I probably frankensteined 6 different phones over time with the spare parts from other victims.

[-]

CharcoalGreyWolf@reddit

Call HR and tell them you have a problem of Titanic proportions