Still my favorite joke I ever came up with. :)
Posted by Maleficent-Cry2576@reddit | Jokes | View on Reddit | 19 comments
A monocle strolls into a bar. After a couple of drinks, he starts feeling pretty great (and a bit unsteady). He reaches for a cigarette, but the bartender cuts him off. "Sorry, pal, but city rules ban smoking inside. You'll have to go outside if you want to smoke."
So the monocle jumps down from the bar stool and picks up his cigarettes to head out. At the same time, a second monocle comes out of the bathroom. They collide as they pass each other and tumble to the ground, completely twisted together. They attempt to untangle themselves, but the harder they try, the more knotted they get.
The bartender stares down at the mess and shakes his head. "Hey, you two!" he yells. "Quit making spectacles of yourselves!"
skanktastik@reddit
The bartender notices the two monocles now look like regular eyeglasses. "Oh No!" they say. "We've been framed!"
Arstanishe@reddit
holy smoking monocles, an original joke
LoftyQPR@reddit
Don't get too close to the fire and make an ash of yourself.
notyourregularninja@reddit
Dads salute you
boots_the_barbarian@reddit
You can see the ending coming, but the punchline is still set up well.
marvsup@reddit
Wait I saw this posted like a few years ago by someone claiming to have invented it. Was that also you?
Odd_Tea_2100@reddit
Bye monocles.
DangerMacAwesome@reddit
This is a good joke. We will let you know when it's assigned a number
tongmengjia@reddit
String walks into a bar and asks for a drink. Bartender says, "Sorry, we don't serve strings around here." The string walks out, twists himself around, and comes back in. Bartender says, "Hey, aren't you that string I just tossed out?"
String replies, "'fraid [k]not."
prone2rants@reddit
Until I got my round tuit, I didn't get this joke
PuzzlingDad@reddit
frayed knot = 'fraid not
what_happens_larry@reddit
Great joke but I’ve definitely heard before
Soapist_Culture@reddit
As soon as it got to the second monocle, it was obvious the punchline was going to include 'spectacles'.
The-Ant-Whisperer@reddit
Sorry you could see it a mile away.
Academic_Purchase225@reddit
Nothing gets past you.
twick2010@reddit
I got fired from my job at the eye glass factory. I fell into the lens grinder and made a spectacle of myself.
axolotl_fart@reddit
Har!
toeragportaltoo@reddit
That's so stupid. I love it.
goNorthYoung@reddit
LOL my daughter hated this and my husband is dying laughing - it’s a winner!