A woman is walking through the park when she sees a very attractive man sitting on a bench. He's reading a book and eating some fruit out of a Tupperware container. Slowly, the woman gathers courage to go ask him out. She walks over, takes a seat next to him, turns and says...
Posted by 808gecko808@reddit | Jokes | View on Reddit | 264 comments
"Sorry to bother you. I know this may be a little forward but I would love to grab coffee with you some time."
Flattered, the man responds, "Sure...but what makes you so certain you and I would get along so well?"
"Well..." the woman says. "A couple things, actually. I noticed you were wearing a Metallica t-shirt. They're my favorite band of all time. When they went on their And Justice For All tour, my parents took me to see them in Chicago. I was 12 years old and it was the first concert I ever went to. I absolutely love Metallica."
The man can't believe it.
"I saw them play in Chicago too! First concert I ever went to on my own. My best friend Mike and I told our parents we were sleeping at each others' houses, snuck out, took a bus into the city and saw them play at the World Music Theater!"
Naturally, they're both shocked.
"If that isn't weird enough..." says the woman. "I noticed you're reading Mark Twain. I was a communications major in university and I actually wrote my thesis on Mark Twain and how he used satire as a lens to comment on current events of the time, comparing him to satirical news sources of today. He's my favorite author."
Now the man is really taken aback, "Get out of here! I was an English major in university! I specialized in 19th century American literature and this is like my fourth or fifth time reading Tom Sawyer, I absolutely love Mark Twain."
They both can't believe it...this has got to be a match made in heaven.
"Ok..." the woman says. "Well, buckle up because here's the icing on the cake. I noticed you're eating a prune. Prunes are my absolute favorite fruit. When I was a kid, my grandfather lived on a farm. He had an orchard that mainly grew apples and some lemons, but he knew how much my sister and I loved prunes so he kept a couple of plum trees. Every year at the end of the summer, we'd go up and harvest the plums with him. He'd dry them and by the time we'd go back to his place for Thanksgiving he'd always have those prunes saved just for us. They're my favorite fruit! I love prunes, you're eating a prune, this has got to be fate. What do you say?"
The man puts down his fruit and responds,
"It's a date!"
Odovacer_0476@reddit
True story: When I was in high school, I had an independent study period in the same classroom as this girl who had a crush on me. (I was dating someone else.) Sometimes we would snack on our lunches, so one day I was eating dates. The girl was facing the other direction and didn’t know what I was eating. Without thinking, I said, “Do you want a date.” When she turned around, her face was lit up like the sun. I felt sorry about that.
retiredhawaii@reddit
Similar disappointment. I wasn’t ready for a new puppy but my wife was. One day we’re leaving Home Depot and I notice the food cart, she doesn’t. When I said “ do you want to get a couple of dogs?” She looks, smiles and says really, I thought were we just getting one? That’s the moment I knew we weren’t talking about the same dogs. It’s a running joke now.
W0lfp4k@reddit
So you got the dog?
Puzzled-Tea3037@reddit
Yes I'm confused on that story too. Running joke about what ?
weetabixcoldmilk@reddit
They got an updog
robinw77@reddit
Please clarify what an updog is?
Hogfisher@reddit
What’s updog?
Fossilhund@reddit
The opposite of down dog, of course!
Most-Car-4056@reddit
This person yogas.
W0lfp4k@reddit
Yo wassup?
Fnordmeister@reddit
Q: What did Sushi A say to Sushi B?
A: Wasssa, B?
Pfyxoeous@reddit
I would also be interested about the circumstances that surround the topic of said updog.
Dzjeek@reddit
Just ask what it is?
Pfyxoeous@reddit
I mean, first, we asked for clarification. Then, we asked for the surrounding circumstances. How could we be more clear?
Dzjeek@reddit
It is in the question itself. You must ask the question in order to gain the answer.
OurNewestMember@reddit
Okay. What is....the best way to learn about updog?
Dzjeek@reddit
Just ask what it is, and the answer will reveal itself.
rake66@reddit
What is it?
Dzjeek@reddit
...this is going to take a long time
Acrobatic_Matter_109@reddit
I managed to get through War and Peace before anyone cottoned on.
Frequent_Cat10@reddit
Hey, what's up dog?
Dzjeek@reddit
Not much, sup with you dog
SittingInAnAirport@reddit
Just chillin', trying to figure out what an updog is...
Dzjeek@reddit
I'm good wats up with you?
phonetastic@reddit
okay, sure, i'll do it: what, would you say, is an updog?
EverythingZen19@reddit
Updog, oh updog, what for art thou, oh updog?
DoFr56@reddit
The food cart served hot dogs. (wanna get a dog) Op did not get a hot dog from food cart. Wife still too sad over losing dog recently.
Got an updog instead. Wassup dog? Do not know how to make more clear.
Free_Tax_7170@reddit
He's Underdog's brother
Powerful-Company9722@reddit
It’s like a buttfor.
robinw77@reddit
Could you also clarify what a buttfor is?
Appropriate_Steak486@reddit
Not much, please clarify what an updog is with you?
BreakfastPizzaStudio@reddit
Anybody here from Kent?
kmactane@reddit
Now they just need a henway.
Candid-Fan6638@reddit
Wait what's a henway?
DontTaseMemeBro@reddit
About 5-6 lbs
Objective-Ganache114@reddit
…if it’s a plump one
HotDonnaC@reddit
That’s a big hen. A roaster.
Captain_Darlington@reddit
A cowsay.
ItsErnestT@reddit
A Greek urn.
danceswithtree@reddit
What's an updog?
ecodick@reddit
Not much bud, what's up with you?
Setari@reddit
That wasn't even the correct setup.
Appropriate_Steak486@reddit
Sometimes, you gotta go with, "Close enough."
Dzjeek@reddit
🤣 someone was waiting for it and I don't blame you.
bakeranders@reddit
GOT EEMMMMMM
Dragonasaur@reddit
Alfredo, what does FUPA stand for?
bakeranders@reddit
What’s, updog….precious?!
BreakfastPizzaStudio@reddit
Boil ‘em, mash ‘em… stick ‘em in a stew. 😰
Dzjeek@reddit
We need to know!
rhmillernj@reddit
Of course he got a dog, “happy wife, happy life”. :-)
FFF_in_WY@reddit
Or the equivalent maxim - happy husband, uh, well nevermind
tomorrow509@reddit
, angry wife.
AE_WILLIAMS@reddit
A raw dog.
--TheCity--@reddit
Just give her the dog and the hotdog.
GWJYonder@reddit
RIP Home Depot hot dogs I miss you.
efiwib@reddit
Gotta go with Costco hot dogs for the win!
Flukie42@reddit
Do all Home Depots not have hot dogs anymore?
Last time I grabbed them were for my Dad's 70th birthday 3 years ago. This is going to be devastating.
GWJYonder@reddit
I know a lot of them closed down before this, but mine never reopened after COVID. If yours made it through COVID there is a good chance it's still there.
Flukie42@reddit
I'm sorry for your loss.
There is just something and Home Depot hot dogs.
IamMrT@reddit
Where the fuck do you live that Home Depot has hot dogs?
pearlysdad@reddit
My local Home Depot ((NYC) has a stand that not only sells hot dogs but primarily sells sausage and peppers.
RevolutionaryBug2915@reddit
They were in the Detroit area, too, at least in the western suburbs. I don't think there are any left now around here.
Flukie42@reddit
Chicago suburb
GWJYonder@reddit
It's freaking perfect man, I can't believe they got rid of them. You're doing some project and things are going wrong, it's taking way more time than you thought it would, like it always does, and you forgot a piece or something broke so you head to the hardware store. You've lost track of time and you're hungry, but wait, they have a hotdog stand there!
sleeper_54@reddit
Not a thing here in Iowa either, that I am aware of.
I sure as hell like the idea though ...I can smell the wood and the 'rolling' hot dogs already.
bakeranders@reddit
Home Depot’s have hotdogs!?!
macthecomedian@reddit
Ive only ever lived in So Cal, but I've never been to a Home Depot that sold hot dogs....
Camiata2@reddit
Depot Dogs are still a thing in Chicago!
Flukie42@reddit
I'm a Chicago suburb. It's great to know. I'm gonna take my dad this week.
Camiata2@reddit
I can only speak to a couple on the NW side that I've been at in the not too distant past so YMMV
MuzikPhreak@reddit
Today we found out @Flukie42 is actually Winnetka
Flukie42@reddit
Shhhh... Don't tell anyone. I'm cosplaying perfectly as a humanoid!
phonetastic@reddit
this is why calling them glizzies is so important
jimyrvine@reddit
I ran into Costco all panicked one time, said someone ran over a dog in the parking lot. Bunch of people came rushing outside. It was a hotdog.
boethius61@reddit
r/hotdogs is listening
Pun_In_Ten_Did@reddit
r/hotdogsorlegs is ready to chime in.
mrgoobster@reddit
When I was 19, I chaperoned the senior camping trip for my old high school. One of the senior girls developed a crush on me. Then she came to the same university as me. Because I'd spent some time with her on the trip, I knew she liked hiking, so I invited her to go on a hike near campus. The destination of the hike was a rose garden. When we got there, I realized that she thought it was a date. She got angry at me (rightly so, I guess), then when we got back to her dorm, a classmate of hers also from our HS also chewed me out.
I've honestly never felt so stupid.
ItsErnestT@reddit
You should have begged her pardon.
patch1103@reddit
Along with the sunshine, there’s gotta be a little rain sometime.
mrgoobster@reddit
I apologized profusely, fwiw.
Odovacer_0476@reddit
Rookie mistake. We’ve all been there.
zealoSC@reddit
New pick up line unlocked
DrPantaleon@reddit
Reminds me of a list of humorous pick-up lines I once read, it went something like this: carry a packet of dates with you wherever you go. If you see someone you fancy, as them: do you want a date? If they say yes, deny them the date until they go out with you.
BankshotMcG@reddit
This is the real payoff to this post.
EatCrud@reddit
The real payoff comments are always in the comment section.
sleeper_54@reddit
Funny how that works.
Motion_Means4501@reddit
My similar but naive experience got me in trouble when I was sitting behind this girl and found a loose screw on the floor.
pleasetrimyourpubes@reddit
That reminds me of the kid who offered a girl a kiss. Hershey's Kiss.
woburnite@reddit
there's a whole song about this. "I used to work in Milwaukee, in a department store...."
TheDevilsAdvokaat@reddit
Please tell me you went through with it just to not disappoint her.
Odovacer_0476@reddit
No. I don’t think my girlfriend would have liked that.
TheDevilsAdvokaat@reddit
Oh. I forgot you were already dating someone...
Masterji_34@reddit
Complete the damn story, what happened after that?
Odovacer_0476@reddit
I showed her the dates I was eating. We had a good laugh about it, but I could tell she was disappointed.
RashikiB@reddit
Something similar happened to me. I became friends with a female coworker and we'd often go for lunch together. One day, I hopped into my car and noticed a wood screw on the floor mat. I picked it up and held it out and as she climbed into the car, I said, "Hey! Wanna screw?". She gasped, looked at me, saw the screw, then burst out laughing.
AE_WILLIAMS@reddit
Unfortunately for them both, she had a left-hand thread.
Marksmdog@reddit
And did she?
Fafnir13@reddit
Did you realize what it sounded like before or after you said it?
RashikiB@reddit
After. 😬
Odovacer_0476@reddit
😂
Loud-Vacation-5691@reddit
Many doctors recommend lots of dates for teenage girls, even pre-teens. You can't beat their laxative effect.
riotz1@reddit
And technically you stay a virgin if you do it that way
TurbulentWeb1941@reddit
I read that as "True story: When I was high in school." 🤦♂️
intherealworld2@reddit
The joke had even more juice
Interesting-Job3678@reddit
Is that a metafor..
Fantastic_Aerie_3509@reddit
maybe the joke was the time we wasted reading this
AGRANMA@reddit
The real joke was the time we wasted along the way.
H-town80@reddit
Ummmm….what was the joke??
RPG_Rob@reddit
Word play on date
International-Ask-72@reddit
So no one's been able to figure out what an uodog is to this point. Wonderful, just wondering.
paapakeka@reddit
Many years ago when I first started as a grocery cashier, a customer came to my register with a produce bag of dried fruits. Back then, there weren’t universal produce codes, and if you didn’t have the code memorized, you had to look it up on a list of codes. I asked the customer what they were (as they were not very common in Hawai’i), but I couldn’t find the code for them. A lot of people started laughing when I went on the PA system and asked, “Produce Dept, price per pound on loose dates, please?”
ToastedSlider@reddit
Plums are more of an early summer fruit than end of.
Fnordmeister@reddit
www.youtube.com/watch?v=8iO5-ic0Ug4
SignificantPen9325@reddit
I wanted a dog. My wife wanted a cat. We compromised.
The cat's name is "Familiar."
Fnordmeister@reddit
... The cat's name is "Adog".
RichardDeRenour@reddit
There's a minute and a half of my life I'll never get back...
Fnordmeister@reddit
Fifteen minutes, if you count reading the comments ...
Logical_not@reddit
Cute. The ending could be taken either way: that she got her date, or that she blew it.
Fnordmeister@reddit
Or ... she blew it, or she blew him.
VintAge6791@reddit
...Bad. Dates.
Rhurabarber@reddit
No ticket.
Button_Pusher10@reddit
I was the next man
Fnordmeister@reddit
Why did it have to be snakes?
Substantial-Basis179@reddit
World music theater? Is this 1997?
OlaFinesse@reddit
😂🤣🤣😂
Icooktoo@reddit
My boss and I were headed to a restaurant supply store. I was driving. I had recently returned from a trip to Europe and thought of something I had learned in the UK. So I said “they have swan tenders in UK”. His response: “fried?! They must be huge!”. I nearly crashed from laughing so hard. We still joke about it and I retired three years ago.
HotDonnaC@reddit
😂😂 Good one.
Training-Farmer8476@reddit
It's like saying, "Come along, I have something to show you, then take us on a five mile hike to show us a dog turd". - Andy Richter, the Swedish German
Academic-Treacle3162@reddit
Done that! Except it was thousands spent to be taken on a cold 4am drive in an open jeep for hours just to see tiger poop.
clamsumbo@reddit
I drove to see cow poop once. but it was only 10 minutes in my hometown on a nice day (it was the winning turd in a 'cow pie bingo fundraiser'.. nothing better to do that afternoon)
mikemaca@reddit
I used to go to a pioneer era 4th of July event that had a pie eating contest followed by a distance contest flinging actual cow patties. Great fun.
clamsumbo@reddit
you fling them with a shovel? cow pie catapult? gloves?
mikemaca@reddit
With your bare ungloved hand like a frisbee!! Isn't that fun!
clamsumbo@reddit
Oh. For some reason I assumed fresh. Dried is a totally different game.
mikemaca@reddit
Yeah dried like is commonly used as a source for cooking fire. Wet would not work as a frisbee!
Fafnir13@reddit
I think these are referred to as shaggy dog stories, so it’s apt to bring up a dog.
You want an even longer hike?
farrenkm@reddit
I read that whole thing to my wife one time. First time I've ever felt my marriage was in danger. Well, and me too.
teichholtz@reddit
You read that to your wife? I hope you have a really good divorce lawyer.
farrenkm@reddit
I don't. And fortunately this was several years ago. I don't think I need one now. (Don't think I do . . .)
Fafnir13@reddit
Legend for taking that risk.
docjonel@reddit
Responding to a Norm joke, I believe.
pete1729@reddit
The moth joke was like this, but very good.
Ewetootwo@reddit
Thanks for shedding light on this.
TheMadDruid@reddit
Very shaggy!
IowanByAnyOtherName@reddit
It is usually very rare for two of the great American writer’s fans to get together, or as it has been said, “Never the Twain shall meet.”
Wintermute3333@reddit
That joke was fruitless.
BreakfastPizzaStudio@reddit
It’s bananas.
Specialist_Body_170@reddit
The pits.
wavaif4824@reddit
a dried up and shriveled punchline
msfs1310@reddit
Well then orange you glad it just peeled off you?
Oshabeestie@reddit
Just a little dated ?
Wonderful-Toe543@reddit
Feels a little dry.
multicultidude@reddit
It’s a joke that will speed up my intestinal transit if I keep chewing on it…
Awkward-Bird@reddit
Seemed more fruitful to me
BuckyBeaver69@reddit
I feel dated too as I was around that age too back when Metallica was on their And Justice For all tour.
davidbinette@reddit
of course... if he had nuts he'd have dates.
yoaktown357@reddit
"That's interesting. I don't care for them, tbh. I just have a really hard time pooping after I lost part of my large intestine to crohn's.
What's your position on the semi-colon?"
RedHal@reddit
TL;DR.
freightgod1@reddit
At least they have that in comma.
jsbach90@reddit
He should have told her that soon she'll be grippin' her pillow tight
IolausTelcontar@reddit
Exit light.
kasugakuuun@reddit
It ain't just Night that's entering
Jagsfan2025@reddit
He’s the One
Opening_Cheesecake54@reddit
Good one! Take my upvote
Relevant_Ad_5431@reddit
I liked it.
GargleBlargleFlargle@reddit
I like the fact that it could go either way.
kasugakuuun@reddit
Even if the punchline is kinda underwhelming (which may be the point, given the elaborate setup), the scenario was really cute and it was fun kiving in that world for a little bit
Not usually something one looks for in a joke, but hey
Aerodrache@reddit
You sound like you'd enjoy Nate the Snake.
Kitsosp@reddit
My thoughts exactly
dantelikesit2@reddit
Deal breaker!!!
Pause_Affectionate@reddit
Delightful! Bravo!
benjaminck@reddit
That was a long walk.
dropswisdom@reddit
The joke must have been buried deep in there
GetInMyMinivan@reddit
The last paragraph and sentence. He corrected her that he’s not eating a prune, “it’s a date”
No-Fun6261@reddit
Now see, I read it as though he agreed to the coffee “date” at that very moment, and blurted out, “it’s a date” which she misinterpreted as contradiction.
taoistrecluse@reddit
You’ve only read The Adventures Tom Sawyer four or five times? What the hell?
drpengweng@reddit
I took honors-level organic chemistry from a Dr. Bergbreiter, the single best professor I ever had in anything. His class was infamously difficult, but he was so phenomenal and hilarious to boot. He held extra office hours from 5 pm to midnight two or three days a week where most of the class would show up and we would all work through the weekly problem set together. He would just hang out and do paperwork and answer questions or help us when we got stuck. It was just a dozen or so nerdy-ass honors students hanging out doing organic chemistry synthesis problems until late in the evening. Good times. And he was a great professor.
Anyway, one time he went to Egypt to speak at a conference, and he brought us back this box of sugared dates. We passed them around, and I took one and said without thinking, “Ooooh, I’ve never had a date.”
He didn’t miss a beat. “Yes, that’s usually the case with this type of people.”
WannaBaCowboy@reddit
Pitiful
Al_Kydah@reddit
Now I'm probably going to the library in search of some Twain
AWingedVictory1@reddit
That was not even funny. Prunes are a totally different fruit. Makes literally no sense
Krostas@reddit
But they kinda do look alike? It's not like apples and oranges visually, now is it?
I could dissect the joke and its punchline further for you, if needed.
AWingedVictory1@reddit
I love jokes that have to be dissected and punchlines explained Makes them even funnier….. honestly
Krostas@reddit
Judging by the upvotes on the joke itself, this seems more like a you-problem.
OneStoneTwoMangoes@reddit
dissect the joke and it’s punchline further, bot
Krostas@reddit
Beep bat, you're a twat.
Now is that something a bot would say?
Ewetootwo@reddit
That’s exactly why it is funny. Great joke.
AWingedVictory1@reddit
Humour in the USA or wherever you guys live, must be very different to here.
r2killawat@reddit
It's not that hard to get. They have a lot in common and he should be saying it's a date to go out with the girl, but she thinks his date is a prune. It's really pretty clever.
AWingedVictory1@reddit
I get it. Obviously. But it isn’t funny and rambles on for far too long Very happy for you if you do find it funny. But I thought this was a joke thread.
AccountHater@reddit
Oh my god so much text for a fucken pun.
Tughill87@reddit
Here’s an abbreviated joke using the same punch line. Let’s workshop it.
A nerdy guy was eating a snack from his brown bag. He noticed a very attractive woman walking toward him, watching him eat. He thought “Wow! I’d love to go out with her.” Normally he was far too shy to say anything, but when she sidled up next to him and said, “OMG I love prunes!”, he looked at her and meekly uttered “It’s a date.”
platinum_toilet@reddit
Is this supposed to be funny?
Empty_Nestor@reddit
This is like Norm MacDonald’s moth joke - the long buildup is part of the gag.
dirkalict@reddit
Not it be “that guy” but the World Music Theatre is in Tinley Park… so if the kid took a bus into “the city” he would have had to taken another out of the city to the suburb of Tinley Park… change it to The United Center and I wouldn’t have been distracted by pedantics…
Stephies34@reddit
And justice for all was late 80s. The United center didn't open until '94.
dirkalict@reddit
We have a conundrum… Metallica did play in Tinley Park on that tour- July 3rd,1994…. So he will have to change his joke to “We snuck out and took a bus OUT of the city”.
Stephies34@reddit
Also re-reading the joke, the man never said what tour it was, so it could have been at the world. Either way your original point still stands. Tinley is not The city. I endorse your proposed amendment.
BuckeyeBuster69@reddit
I am glad you’re “that guy” because if not, it’d be me! As soon as they said “bus into the city and saw them play at The World Music Theater” i just thought WRONG!
Bitter31@reddit
I'm glad you are both "that guy" so I don't have to be "that guy" by pointing out that 2 Americans would have discussed what they studied in college, not university.
BadDadWhy@reddit
I would have put the last two lines as "The man puts down his fruit, crestfallen, and sadly responds: It's a date.
guardianandromeda@reddit
Fate is done with humanity.
do_not_ask_my_name@reddit
L
ArtisticDimension446@reddit
I always end up with stuff from work in my pocket.
Was digging for some change to pay for a soda and pulled out a couple of screws, showed one to the cashier (who wasn't looking) and said "wanna screw?" She looked up quickly, like she was mad, and the turned red when she saw the screw in my hand.
She still laughs and says "No!" If I go digging for change.
Aggravating_Run_4221@reddit
Har har!
Mackntish@reddit
I thought he was going to stand up and be short, and she would be like ew nm.
karma_the_sequel@reddit
When the juice is not worth the squeeze.
shittychinesehacker@reddit
How tragic
Feindish-OD@reddit
You can really expand this to one hell of a shaggy dog
roddyvands@reddit
This smacks of a Norm MacDonald joke. A really long unnecessary set up for a simple pun. I love it
Single_Ad_674@reddit
I thought that was his best childhood friend Mike who had transitioned....
Fafnir13@reddit
I was leaning towards same grandpa, but a transitioned Mike seemed possible. Would have been weird to completely forget her best friend though.
AWingedVictory1@reddit
Me too
recXion_@reddit
r/dadjokes
warlock415@reddit
r/feghoots
Ooh-Rah@reddit
Ehhh...
medusagardens@reddit
The woman says “oh” and sadly walks away.
The man, confused and now a bit disappointed, continues eating his prunes
BestAhead@reddit
er…..dates.
Lucyyyyyy_K@reddit
So much buildup for nothing
Independent_Bite4682@reddit
He is not eating prune, he is eating dates.
drowned_beliefs@reddit
I come to this sub for the culinary precision.
Independent_Bite4682@reddit
Recipe called for 2 eggs, I don't understand why it is so wet, a only used two ostrich eggs.
JimAsia@reddit
A lot of dates appreciate that in a man.
External-Tear-5076@reddit
When I lived in Ohio I was Dayton a girl from Eaton, and Eaton a girl from Dayton
Lucyyyyyy_K@reddit
I know
pleasetrimyourpubes@reddit
I knew it was one of those so I skipped to the punchline. also I kinda hate Metallica for the Napster BS.
NumbDumbLuck@reddit
“Copyright law and digital music rights are no joke,” my buddy Lars is always telling me. It’s pretty much all he ever talks about.
Odd_Bodkin@reddit
Shaggy dog!
West_Inside_3112@reddit
It is what you make of it. If you think the date fruit was a conversation stopper, Lucyyy will end up with nothing. If you think a date is starting with a joined trip to a coffee bar, he might up eating her prunes after the date....
DontEatThatTaco@reddit
World Music Theater is Tinley, so you'd take a bus out of the city to get to it, but otherwise, a fruitful tale.
SpendHefty6066@reddit
This joke is the pits.
Demoniac_smile@reddit
I thought it was just peachy.
Spacey_dan@reddit
I thought it was a plum fine bit of humor
NumbDumbLuck@reddit
It’s not a joke nor the pits. It’s the stone cold truth!
KYReptile@reddit
Aaarrgghhh! Good one.
letterboxmind@reddit
Marie! They're Minerals!
Fun-Ad3471@reddit
😂😂😂
chux4w@reddit
If she was 12 during the Damaged Justice tour, she'd be about 50 now.
RedditorRahulS@reddit
So. Go on........... Was it really a date (for both of them) 🤔
DoorEqual1740@reddit
That is worth the slow build up!
whanch@reddit
Real Norm MacDonald "moth goes to a podiatrists office" vibes. I really liked this joke
Nitirat@reddit
Top-tier.
legallyalienated@reddit
OK — that was a LOT — but good — it was even enough to flirt just at the edge of being TOO MUCH —- yet still good
Educational_Sir_3595@reddit
Mind if we dance wif yo dates?
lil-wolfie402@reddit
Not at all, as a matter of fact, we were just
Odd_Tea_2100@reddit
Too long could use a little pruning.
huntressm00n@reddit
Sadly the funniest part of this joke is that I was munching on a handful of dates when I read it...
Waitsfornoone@reddit
A scientist brings a sandwich to life by feeding it prunes and bran for 3 days. He then hears its first words...
This sub is going to shit.
gutzville@reddit
What do an incel, me eating prunes and Microsoft Excel have in common.
They all incorrectly assume everything is a date.
Jakester42@reddit
Norm?
FredFlintston3@reddit
Waaay too linear for Norm.
farfromfine@reddit
Not one line about the bitter cold of the siberian winter that was especially bad in 1946 when commissioner Petr von Anders Christian Ma'alu, the first russian/german/Hawaiian first visited
CreHater@reddit
Nooooooooorrrm
etgreyt1@reddit
Didn't see that one coming... well done!
jollymuhn@reddit
I thought that was going in another direction.
JackSilver1410@reddit
Actually some dates sound pretty good right now..
ExtremelyOnlineTM@reddit
YES!
laxpanther@reddit
Die, heretic scum!
that_gu9_@reddit
I cannot wait for the office on Monday. And I shall tell that joke. And pitch forks will be raised and I may need to leave forever. But it will be worth it
BankshotMcG@reddit
This is a very dated joke.
bfd_fapit@reddit
Normesque, but needs to be about twice as long with a few pointless diversions or observations.
LordvaderUK@reddit
HAVE AN ANGRY UPVOTE
Malbethion@reddit
Well that’s just plum loco.
2whatextent@reddit
Works for me!
Centurianmacro@reddit
I enjoyed it!