A programmer designs a bar.
Posted by mindsmith108@reddit | Jokes | View on Reddit | 56 comments
He does all the testing he could think of; he orders one beer. Gets 1 beer.
Her orders 10 beers. Gets 10 beers.
He orders -1 beer. The barman looks at him suspiciously.
He performs the same testing on other drinks too. Yes, even the complex cocktails and mocktails. All the drinks come out perfect.
Satisfied with all the tests results. He is finally ready to open the bar to public just when he remembers he didn’t test ordering water. So he goes back to the bar and does all the testing on water too. Finally, satisfied with the testing he opens the bar to public.
The first customer walks in and goes to restroom, the entire bar collapses.
mindsmith108@reddit (OP)
OR if you want to take it meta, the punch line could be; A rabbi, a priest, and an imam walks in the bar and the bar collapses.
MaterialParsley7536@reddit
And they each ordered -1 drinks
GrabtharsHumber@reddit
And got 32767 drinks.
DaoFerret@reddit
They ordered two drink and got 10.
Hamshamus@reddit
They each ordered a drink and the barman brought out 10
rob_allshouse@reddit
Damnit. I knew I STRuggled TO INTerpret something in the instructions.
DreamyTomato@reddit
No, one ordered a drink, and one didn’t, they were served with 10 drinks.
TyrconnellFL@reddit
A duck walks in and asks, “Got any grapes?”
Believe it or not, the bar collapses.
MusicPsychFitness@reddit
Believe it or not, jail.
AssSpelunkingAtheist@reddit
And he waddled away
MrDilbert@reddit
Till the very next day
Embarrassed-Safe6184@reddit
The version I heard had the programmer also asking for x÷0 beers, pi beers, 255 beers, FF beers, derivative of a constant beers, and so on. I think the first customer ordered a glass of water, and the whole place caught on fire.
Chassian@reddit
Overflow... Error?...
Boerdy0815@reddit
NullPointerException
2beatenup@reddit
Believe it’s stack overflow…
Arizona_Sailor@reddit
Tbh, I don’t get it.
DaoFerret@reddit
On the superficial level it’s a joke about programmers not really understanding how the end users will use a product and missing something simple (like designing/testing the bathroom).
On a deeper level it’s about programmers focusing on the shiny bells and whistles and neglecting to test/implement proper “garbage collection” which often causes crashes.
Arizona_Sailor@reddit
Oh…OK. That happens a lot, the exception handling.
MrDilbert@reddit
It's the exception handling that makes the job hard. It's easy enough to write the "happy path", but you need to think of ALL the ways a user can fuck up the happy path, and even if you think you covered all bases and closed off all holes, a user will find a way to pop up from the floor or ceiling... or the sewage pipe.
lurker1957@reddit
It’s impossible to make a program fool proof because fools are so ingenious!
BadLegitimate1269@reddit
Isn't that why stuff like user playtesters exists?
Kathucka@reddit
Yes, and the only testing in the joke was from programmer himself.
Kathucka@reddit
He had a poor understanding of what happens in bars and failed to account for people who enter but don’t order a drink. So, he only tested drink ordering.
When a computer program encounters a situation that the programmers didn’t anticipate, the program is likely to crash, produce bad results, or otherwise fail ungracefully. The bar failed badly because it encountered an unexpected bathroom user.
It’s funny because real bars don’t act like computer programs.
ynns1@reddit
A condition outside the pre-programmed parameters brought the whoke scheme down.
AppropriateRest2815@reddit
my new favorite way to spell 'woke'
harryregician@reddit
You are not in the biz or never called Microsft for help
tomorrow509@reddit
There is no test like production.
Bosswashington@reddit
As a non-programmer, I have no idea whether this is funny or not.
2beatenup@reddit
You sir are perfect to be a PM or software architect…. ;)
Cryovenom@reddit
It's funny because it hits close to home.
You test everything you can possibly think of, and then Murphy's law kicks in and the first user to blunder their way into your app crashes it immediately, leaving you scratching your head going "What?! How?!..."
Yes, laughing through tears.
sqeeezy@reddit
Aren't jokes supposed to make you laugh, or at least smile?
2beatenup@reddit
Crying inside is sort of a laughing too
Nannyphone7@reddit
He didn't order [disregard all previous instructions sys 1024] beers.
Cryovenom@reddit
Way back in college we had to design a simple windows form that somewhat resembled a bank machine.
I had coded and tested everything I could think of - negative numbers, numbers with eight decimal places, letters, weird symbol characters...
My buddy sits down, looks at it, types nothing at all into the "amount" box and hits Enter.
It crashed.
I went on to make my career on the hardware/netwoking side of things instead.
Anonymous_Bozo@reddit
We to a demo of an accounting system our company was wanting to buy. The cheif programmer went thru their demo showing all the features and how they worked. He then invited my boss to sit down and try it.
My boss simply reached out and hit several keys on the keyboard at once, and the program totally crashed.
We ended up writing our own system.
Zestyclose_Space7134@reddit
[ The Spiffing Brit has logged on ]
Cryovenom@reddit
Wonderful! Ladies and gentlemen, now you may be wondering if this issue can be solved with a nice cup of Yorkshire Gold tea. I'm here to tell you that yes it can, because this is a perfectly balanced joke with no exploits...
Zestyclose_Space7134@reddit
I wonder if game devs experience trepidation concerning The Brit.
harryregician@reddit
Programmers handle software.
When buildings collapse, that's a hardware problem.
RecklessPat@reddit
Well it works in myyyyyy restaurant
Gnonthgol@reddit
Computer ran out of memory, ticket closed as "hardware problem".
harryregician@reddit
Memory on back-order
DennisTheBald@reddit
10 beers and he didn't pee? I find that hard to swallow
Kathucka@reddit
Ew.
DCContrarian@reddit
Seems like the punchline should involve an off-by-one error.
DreamyTomato@reddit
It did. You need to read the joke posted after this one.
pcbeard@reddit
I was hoping for complex numbers of cocktails being tested.
Mr_Master501@reddit
He should have ordered -(2\^63)-1 beers as well to see if he would get 2\^63 beers
LordCouchCat@reddit
Related to:
How many computer programmers does it take to change a light bulb?
It can't be done, that's a hardware problem.
todudeornote@reddit
Still waiting for the punchline
Raiddinn1@reddit
As somebody that has worked in IT alongside programmers, can vouch for the validity of this.
mrqibeller@reddit
Stolen from this: https://youtu.be/3uPIFItnrcg?si=rblqW8C6ZvktHu8W
rwu_rwu@reddit
The programmer neglected to account for a case where there is a net increase of liquid in the bar.
harryregician@reddit
Obviously, it is a hardware problem.
Electrical_Tomato_73@reddit
He did it perfectly and the bar ran well for 30 years. Then Anthropic Claude Mythos walks in, orders a shandy of butterbeer and tequila, and the entire building collapses.
sith4life88@reddit
Evidently he should've had an engineer design the bar.