A woman was arrested for trying to cut off her husband's penis
Posted by TheGypsyThread@reddit | Jokes | View on Reddit | 45 comments
She cut his leg instead so they only
charged her with a Missed-Da-Weiner
Careless-Mouse1519@reddit
She botched the bobbit... I stink
l7outlaw@reddit
Hey! Did you hear about Lorena Bobbitt's car accident? !>some dick cur her off!<!
jjjodele@reddit
But did you hear about the Lorena Bobbitt virus? It turns your hard drive into a floppy.
roughczech@reddit
Was she reaching across the isle again?
Careless-Mouse1519@reddit
Tried to stop short
1VrySxyGuy@reddit
Lorena Bobbitt threw the dick out onto the highway and hit a cars windshield with two old woman inside. The driver said damn did you see the dick on that fly?
2whatextent@reddit
Shouldn't it be she cut some dick off.
l7outlaw@reddit
I prefer the karmic version.
airpope2@reddit
Lorena Bobbie’s him
Rockefeller1337@reddit
Wiener comes from Wien and is written with ie
Pyrimo@reddit
This is so bad it wraps around to being funny as hell
elpechos@reddit
I can't even
refreshing_username@reddit
What an odd comment
secretprocess@reddit
Some prime punnage here
aftermarketlife420@reddit
So just 7?
SirIanPost@reddit
6-7.
AKMonkey2@reddit
Or maybe a 9.
KingDariusTheFirst@reddit
Got 5 on it.
relpmeraggy@reddit
It’s a three at best
KingDariusTheFirst@reddit
Your standards may be lower than mine. but you know what they say, “Go ugly early or go home alone!”
gamblersgambit08@reddit
You’ll always see teenager girls walking in odd number groups, because they can’t even
Bella4077@reddit
Lorena Bobbit! Man, I miss the late 1900s…
CurrentlyLucid@reddit
Every time I see a joke like this, I remember a story in the paper when I was young. A woman did not miss da wiener, chopped off the head, and before they could pick it up and run to the hospital, the cat grabbed it and ran off.
RhythmRhymeHarmony@reddit
Lorena Bobbitt was just in a bad car accident. Some dick cut her off.
Mrairjake@reddit
There needs to be an R/Dadjokes
RealCrazySwordGirl@reddit
Ummmm like r/dadjokes ?
dowsyn@reddit
If only...
OgOnetee@reddit
Legally, that's considered to be a dick move.
Oneamongthefence24@reddit
The evidence was circumsional.
SkipperBiff@reddit
It’ll never stand up in court.
xrayboarderguy@reddit
Along with the penal code, circumcisional evidence and it’ll never stand up in court there’s a pretty decent 4-liner joke going here.
Good job Redditors for a new joke in my arsenal!
Odd_Tea_2100@reddit
Viagra fails.
righthandedtank1986@reddit
We got another Lorena Bobbit
wtfw7f@reddit
They’ll sentence her to a penal colony.
Grunty0@reddit
She's lucky - a few inches lower and it could have been a Felo-knee charge.
grimer30@reddit
She almost cut the fella's knee? (Like felony, I'm still practicing doing jokes guys.)
carmium@reddit
No.
voiceofreasonne@reddit
No
Floodhunter345@reddit
I always liked this variant
Mrs Willie is on trial for murdering her husband by hacking him to bits. The judge remarks: You cut off his legs …
You cut off his arms …
You cut off his head …
How could you Mrs. Willie?
Frontrowbass@reddit
OH MY GOD.
iitsrorii@reddit
Lorena Bobbitt? Or new one?
crash866@reddit
Lorena was in a terrible car wreck.
A dick cut her off.
Abdul_Exhaust@reddit
Do you know the penile codes in this state?!?!
Lasernator@reddit
Oh boy this is deep in Dad joke territory. In fact, could not be a Mom joke.
Malgonicus@reddit
Not bad but it should be balls and not leg. More believable.
Also there's probably a follow up joke in there but I'm too tired to think of it.