So a girl is going to marry a Greek fellow. The night before the wedding the girl's dad takes her aside and says, "Honey, I don't know how to say this, so I'll just say it. If he ever asks you to turn over, you don't have to."

Did... did you just admit that your dick is so short, you can't reach the pussy during doggy style, or the ass during pin-her-to-the-wall-and-throw-her-legs-over-your-shoulders?

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CheesyMacarons@reddit

I have never seen a man oust himself more utterly than I have now.

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Puzzleheaded_Quiet70@reddit

Let it go dude, you're making a fool of yourself

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phteven_gerrard@reddit

Of disbelief. You suspend your disbelief and just go with it.

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666Darkside666@reddit

Sodomy used to be anything that doesn't lead to children.

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SuperConfused@reddit

All they were doing was butt stuff, so he asked her to turn over for sex that may lead to pregnancy.

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Sno_Wolf@reddit

They had been having anal sex prior to their wedding night.

The bride's father warned her, not realizing they've been having anal sex all along, that "turn over" means the husband wants anal sex and she doesn't have to agree.

On their wedding night, the husband asks her to turn over, presumably on her back, so they can have PIV sex that will result in a child.

The wife tells the husband she doesn't have to, not understanding her father's warning was about anal sex.

The husband asks her if she wants kids.

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VioletDreaming19@reddit

Turn over for sex. The girl’s father is trying to say she doesn’t have to do anal if she doesn’t want to. ‘Don’t you want to have kids?’ Means they’ve been having anal all along.

There’s a whole thing about the ancient Greeks being very gay, thus lots of butt stuff.

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Julienator@reddit

I hope he washed first is all I can say here lol

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elendur@reddit

Plus they had a lot of olive oil around.

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Kevin33024@reddit

Greek Diddy has entered the conversation

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Greek is the term prostitutes use for "anal sex." The Dad implied she didn't have to turn over for anal, but didn't realize that was their current modus operandi, so the husband takes it as saying she doesn't want vaginal intercourse.

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clickillsfun@reddit

Greek sex is a synonym for anal sex and not used by prostitutes only but is rather a common knowledge. The same as Spanish sex or French sex have also their own distinct meaning.

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JescoInc@reddit

I feel like i'm a bit out of the loop because i've never heard of the terms "Spanish Sex" or "French Sex" in my 38 years of life.

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AscenDevise@reddit

Look up the term 'gamahuche', which used to be employed as-is in English a while ago, for the French one.

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Long-Fan308@reddit

Or me in my 46!

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McPuckLuck@reddit

The same as Spanish sex or French sex have also their own distinct meaning.

Hold up... I knew about Greek. What are those?

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lolabythebay@reddit

"In the French style" is archaic for "blow job."

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clickillsfun@reddit

Yes

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jackgrafter@reddit

One of them involves garlic and the other olive oil?

I have no idea.

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jackgrafter@reddit

When listening to the joke we assume that the couple have been having traditional vaginal intercourse prior to the husband asking her to turn over.

When he then asks her if she doesn’t want a baby it becomes apparent that he’s been doing her in the wrong’un from the get go and thus the humour is derived.

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Acceleratio@reddit

Turning around means he can have anal sex with her. The joke is that she already did this all the time and he only asked for vaginal intercourse eventually so they could have kids.

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Moethelion@reddit

Turns out she had been turned over all along.

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kjm16216@reddit

It turns out the real turn overs were the turns we overed along the way.

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Xqgshsbdusbajab@reddit

That's so stupid ,I snort-laughed 🤣

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robertpetry@reddit

Ah. lol. Now I get it. Of course I assumed she was on her back the whole time lol. Dub

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dido_meditatur@reddit

She still has her hymen

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Floss_tycoon@reddit

The poophole loophole.

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Deletereous@reddit

I know that song!

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socksockshoeshoe@reddit

Dad is saying if he asks her to turn over, she can say no, implying she doesn't need to do butt stuff if she doesn't want to

The joke is they've been doing anal all along and he's asking her to turn over for piv to have kids

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sherriffflood@reddit

Guy marries a young innocent girl and even though they’ve neither had sex, he tells his dad he’s worried about disappointing her on his wedding night, so his dad gives him some advice. ‘Son, whatever you do, don’t cum straight away. If you feel like you’re about to, there’s an ancient chinese trick where you pull out, wack it on the bedpost and stick it back in again. Works like a charm!’

Son few months later on their wedding night, the poor lad is in that same predicament and very excited, so he decides to try the trick. After finding out that it works, he keeps doing it. After the 14th time, his new wife has finally had enough and says, ‘what the hell are you doing? You’re fucking me like a chinese man!’

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Pstrap@reddit

Forget about it Jake. It's Chinatown.

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FreshAyr4Nikey@reddit

Comments, again, did not disappoint 😂

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interesseret@reddit

My friend doesn't get it

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paboi@reddit

How does the punchline explain that they are already doing anal?

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iMogwai@reddit

Turning over was supposed to mean anal but the punchline is that that's what they had been doing all along.

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FlatPresence6648@reddit

Ah! The OTHER Mormon workaround.

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tilt-a-whirly-gig@reddit

Fuck me in the ass because I love Jesus

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bigfootspancreas@reddit

Haha. It's funny, but really tedious. The song, not sodomy. Well, both.

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Zestyclose_Bed4202@reddit

That's called "sodomy". The Bible is very clear about how much you should NOT do that 😂🤣😭

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mexicock1@reddit

.. with men

I don't think it says anything about anal with women

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burbur90@reddit

It does say that if you lay with a woman "in the manner you would with a boy" you should both be stoned. Pretty clearly against hetero anal.

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FuckedUpBlessing@reddit

Both being stoned sounds like a good time.

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work4work4work4work4@reddit

It does seem like it'd make it easier if you were both stoned.

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QuikWitt@reddit

I think you have it backwards.

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somebodyelse22@reddit

That's what we're talking about!

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RealCrazySwordGirl@reddit

They're so great!

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Skylis@reddit

The good lord would have wanted it that wayyyyyyy

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Greasemonkey_Chris@reddit

The poophole loophole.

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Twobits10@reddit

Thanks, now I finally know what "Don't Google Mommy" was all about.

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Allaplgy@reddit

That and her full nude scenes.

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NightMgr@reddit

A/s/l?

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Callector@reddit

Well, if you insist..

Jk, had forgotten about that gem, cheers xD

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Individual-Net5383@reddit

Ye olde Poophole Loophole

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Nice-Mode8064@reddit

Reminds me of “technical virgins” skit form the 00’s

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wmyork@reddit

Ah, The Loophole

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base2-1000101@reddit

Yes, and we all love soaking.

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midlifecrisisAJM@reddit

Poophole loophole!

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TheChumskrubber@reddit

The poophole loophole

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nashyall@reddit

Haha! Your explanation is even funnier than the joke!! 😂

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Spiritual-Sea7674@reddit

Oh 😆 I have to admit I didn't get it, either

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Ooh-Rah@reddit

I had a Greek friend tell me that joke. He was proud of his back door proclivities.

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shotsallover@reddit

She’s already facing the wrong way.

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Greasemonkey_Chris@reddit

"Any hole's a goal!"- Socrates.... probably.

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FinndBors@reddit

You mean the right way.

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shotsallover@reddit

Depends on which way you want the punchline to land.

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Background_Prior_621@reddit

I'm not sure that it's the punchline that's landing.

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RecalcitrantHuman@reddit

It definitely stuck the landing

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roughczech@reddit

Must be a Greek thing...

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Mechasteel@reddit

This lady got fucked in the ass, metaphorically speaking, on her sex education.

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PaperVreter@reddit

Probably home schooled.

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carmium@reddit

Greeks have a comedic reputation for back door entertainment.

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DOOManiac@reddit

Anal sex.

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Kaplaw@reddit

ask him to post on peterexplainthejoke

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CronkinOn@reddit

Baaaaaaaa

/sheep

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CuteGrayRhino@reddit

Ask her to turn over.

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FourteenthCylon@reddit

What’s long and hard that a Greek woman gets on her wedding night?

A new last name.

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PuddinPacketzofLuv@reddit

My mom loved this joke. She went from a 5 letter Irish last name to a 12 letter Greek name.

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uslackr@reddit

my wife married me because my last name was half the length of hers

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ItalianDragn@reddit

Mine married me so her kids wouldn't get mistaken for leprechauns

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Amor_Mortis_Azrael@reddit

Mine married me so that she could get something in a divorce

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stonetemplefox@reddit

Well at least with Greek you just say what you see. The Irish will be like "my name's 'Sloan', it's pronounced 'Michael'"

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Karmabots@reddit

At least in Irish there will be one letter matching between the name and spelling. In French there will be no overlap of letters between name and spelling.

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CaptainPhoton589@reddit

Oui!

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BaldyFecker@reddit

Pssssh. Not true. In Ireland pronunciation is pretty straight forward.

For example Maedhbh is pronounced Maeve.

Tadhg is pronounced Tie-g

Siobháin is pronounced Shove On.

See, easy.

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EHP42@reddit

How could you forget the most common one;

Sean is pronounced Shawn.

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BaldyFecker@reddit

Ah this one's easy.

It's actually Seán. The squiggle above the á is a 'fada' pronounced fodda, which means 'long', therefore the A is a long A, pronounced like Aww, hence Shawn rather than shan as Sean would be pronounced if written without the fada. Sean means 'old'.

See, easy.

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Zorbathepom@reddit

Do you mean Sean means old or Seán means old?

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BaldyFecker@reddit

Sean means old. Seán just means John. There is no J. Pay attention or you're staying back for detention.

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Sanakism@reddit

Better than British English. Here we have surnames like "Cholmondeley" (pronounced "chumly"), "Belvoir" (pronounced "beaver"), "Featherstonehaugh" (pronounced "fanshaw") and "Farage" (pronounced "treasonous cunt")

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hilarymeggin@reddit

And Saoirse is pronounced Sear-shuh.

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harbourwall@reddit

Oh ffs. The rest of us had sort of come to a consensus on what most of the letters mean, except Cyril but he's crazy.

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Mikesaidit36@reddit

Cyril, pronounced “Bradley,” right?

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KasreynGyre@reddit

My name is Finnenahardigan. It’s spelled F-E. That’s it.

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SoUpInYa@reddit

But what you see looks like an eye chart

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hilarymeggin@reddit

Polish guy reading the bottom row of the eye chart:

“K… Z… Y… R… G…”

“Can’t you read it?”

“Read it? That’s my brother-in law!”

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PokebongGo@reddit

Fun fact: In Irish, 'Michael' is pronounced "me-hall".

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IkariYun@reddit

With all the phlegm you can muster on the hall

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miauguau44@reddit

Sooo… Were you born 15 months after their wedding?

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PuddinPacketzofLuv@reddit

I’m the youngest of 2.

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stonetemplefox@reddit

8

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drowned_beliefs@reddit

Surely it was five letters and an apostrophe.

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johnstonb@reddit

Works for Polish too!!

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FourteenthCylon@reddit

I learned it as Polish. When I got married and told the joke to my wife I changed it to Dutch, which also works.

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Musicola@reddit

What's pink and hard in the morning?

The Financial Times crossword

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Classic-Initiative28@reddit

The first Greek joke I ever heard (many decades ago) was: Did you hear about the two Greek guys in bed? They didn’t know which way to turn…

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PineSolSmoothie@reddit

Am I the only one here that can sense how insulting this post would be to Greeks?

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tehnemox@reddit

Yes.

It's a joke. Not everything needs to be a soapbox cause. The Greeks historically do have a relevant habit of anal. Hell, anal itself is referred to as going Greek. Lighten up.

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BRXF1@reddit

We don't really.

In any case we're not bent out of shape about it any more than we are about Americans calling acting like absolute muppets in college "Greek life". It's a hard life for anyone that relies on the worldliness of Americans.

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PineSolSmoothie@reddit

Lol. 'Lighten up". Actually, I don't care at all, but I really do wonder if they mind being the "butt" of all the sodomy jokes - it's their history after all, right? I'm not Greek and I'm certainly not on a soap box defending them either - so maybe lighten up?

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GetInMyMinivan@reddit

Nobody tell them how the pearl necklace they’re clutching came to be there.

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Informal_Stress_9953@reddit

That was beautiful

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Artanis_Creed@reddit

Imagine thinking Greeks are real in the year of our lord two thousand twenty-six.

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PorygonTheMan@reddit

Uhhhhh

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uslackr@reddit

over analysis kills a good joke

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PineSolSmoothie@reddit

The phrase "I don't get it" won't bring a dead joke back to life.

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Chassian@reddit

Pretty esoteric, "doing it Greek" used to be a euphemism for anal sex. For sex with escorts, Greek is a charge option.

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Riluke@reddit

I heard it as:

Greek man asks his friend, "Have you ever done your girlfriend in the other hole?" Friend say, "No! I don't want to get her pregnant!"

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ZincAddict@reddit

Much better

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Vasto_LordA@reddit

Were/are Greeks big on anal or something?

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comfortablynumb15@reddit

The Greeks were big on using Anal as a method of birth control, and also it meant you could do EVERYTHING sexual, and she would still be a Virgin on your wedding night.

Which was handy when you had to hang the marital sheets out the window to show the blood from losing her virginity, to prove any kids were actually the Husbands.

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AspasiaCalling@reddit

Also the Mormons

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NinjatheClick@reddit

How many disputes happened that this had to become a thing...

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ILikeBigBeards@reddit

Yeah I didn't understand the stereotyping here. I guess I'm not in that group of people that has prejudice against greek people.

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Shadow_Hound_117@reddit

It's a joke not a dick, don't take it so hard. Just because it's a joke about Greek people doesn't mean it has to be based on some ill intended prejudice.

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Vasto_LordA@reddit

I forget Greeks still exist ngl, lol.

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pthierry@reddit

My understanding is that it stems from the practice in Ancient Greece of getting boys a sexual education by getting them sodomized by some older guy. On top of that, sex between men was viewed as superior by a number of them (basically, sex with women is obviously necessary but pretty crude if not demeaning).

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bigfootspancreas@reddit

I know a lot of Greeks. It's not ancient Greek. Its current Greek.

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Majic1959@reddit

Dates back to ancient greek days. The greeks were not as homophobic as the rest of the world.

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2ByteTheDecker@reddit

That's the meme yes

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Vasto_LordA@reddit

Ah. Wasn't aware

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kidwrx@reddit

Not the wrong hole, just a different one

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cupidstunt01@reddit

Is there really such a thing as 'the wrong hole?'

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bigfootspancreas@reddit

Depends. The aural canal is quite sensitive.

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xxCorsicoxx@reddit

????

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Stunkydunk@reddit

What does the greekness have to do with the punchline? Do Greek people love butt sex more than the rest of us? (Not bloody likely)

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Sunflower-23456@reddit

As a greek I can confirm that we do

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IsItSupposedToDoThat@reddit

Whether true or not, there is a stereotype that Ancient Greek culture practiced anal sex more than other cultures. Homosexuality was accepted in Ancient Greece and there are artefacts documenting this.

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AlphaTangoFoxtrt@reddit

The Greeks invented sex.

The Romans decided to include women.

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Ooh-Rah@reddit

I first heard that joke in the 1970's, but it's still funny.

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AutoModerator@reddit

/u/Ooh-Rah has unlocked an opportunity for education!

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Green_Temperature_57@reddit

How do you separate the men from the boys in the Greek Navy?

With a crowbar.

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Two-Sided: Flip and rotate every 3-6 months to maintain support and extend life.

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Husband: "What! And fill the house full of kids?".

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rainintheface1@reddit

That was a horrible joke.

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wyldguy71@reddit

Turn her over on the same schedule as when you rotate your mattress.