Funniest dad and witty jokes

Posted by Lower-Debt1627@reddit | Jokes | View on Reddit | 102 comments

1:

A man walks into a library and asks the librarian: “Do you have any books on how to commit suicide?” The librarian looks at him and says: “No.” The man asks, “Why not?” She replies: “Because you wouldn’t bring it back.”

2:

A computer scientist’s wife tells him: “Go to the store and buy a loaf of bread. If they have eggs, buy a dozen.” He comes back with 12 loaves of bread. She asks, “Why did you buy so many?” He replies: “They had eggs.”

3:

An infinite number of mathematicians walk into a bar. The first orders one beer. The second orders half a beer. The third orders a quarter of a beer. The bartender pours two beers and says: “Know your limits.”