Being able to read makes me a tech support wizard!
Posted by Ich_mag_Kartoffeln@reddit | talesfromtechsupport | View on Reddit | 71 comments
Just been out on a customer's site doing a repair. Completely routine job, went fine, nothing exciting.
After completing the repair, I was told to go to the office so we could complete the paperwork for the job (because my boss likes to get paid for the work we do). I knocked on the door, "Yeah, come on in mate, grab a seat."
The office was not exactly overstocked with chairs (two in fact, one for each desk), so I had to walk past old mate standing at the (actually a printer/scanner/copier/fax). As I walked past, I glanced down at the screen to see an error message: "Open door A, clear paper jam." Complete with a pretty animation showing door A opening.
So I sat there, aimlessly browsing my phone while old mate muttered to himself. After a minute or two, he apologised for the delay, but he was having problems with the photocopier.
Looking up from my phone, I noticed a label on the end of the machine that said "Door A", which corresponded with the animation I'd seen earlier.
Feeling brave, I suggested that he try opening door A, perhaps using what appeared to be a latch handle next to the "Door A" label. When he looked at me blankly, I helpfully pointed at said latch handle.
Lo and behold, door A duly opened. Old mate was standing there with a stunned, "Now WTF do I do?" expression on his face, so I stood up and looked behind door A. There was a piece of wrinkled up paper plainly visible, so I suggested he try removing it, then close door A.
Following my suggestions, the instant door A clicked shut the machine sprang to life, spitting out about 30 sheets of paper. "Thanks mate, you're a wizard. I can't understand these super-dooper complicated contraptions!"
Mate, even if you can't read -- it's got an animation showing you what do do!
DarknessSurvivor@reddit
Some people can read text on a dead tree, but not on an LCD matrix.
Riajnor@reddit
“Don’t get frustrated at me, it’s not my fault I’m just not a tech person”
It still makes my blood pressure jump to this day. Brah, it’s not that you’re not a “tech person “, it’s that you apparently can’t read and are earning 100k more than me
Kaiten92@reddit
I've heard people say this when not understanding how to....drag and drop files..Not being "tech savvy" has become a trigger word (phrase?) for me
Fun fact: Solitaire was made by Microsoft to specifically teach how to drag and drop with the mouse as the mouse and GUIs were pretty new. This game was made in 1990. 2 years before I was born. And yet there are people older than me who use computers at work and will say they don't know how to drag and drop because they aren't tech savvy.
reni-chan@reddit
"yea but you can do it faster" is like a red muleta for me.
waraukaeru@reddit
Their entire job revolves around operating a computer and they'll still say, "I'm not a computer person". Can you imagine using something for 40 hours per week and not learning about it? What tremendous willful ignorance that takes!
Oddfool@reddit
Companies do their best to make their products as Idiot-Proof as possible.
Unfortunately, society constantly comes out with dumber idiots.
CamelCaseOrCamelToe@reddit
Its a never ending arms race
blind_ninja_guy@reddit
Someone should ride a Sci-Fi book about a super villain company that genetically modifies people to be bigger and bigger idiots with each generation so that a partner company can make idiot proof products, all the guys of improving return on investment and positive cash flow.
grampsalot64@reddit
The number of people willing to pay me to enroll their WIn10 systems into the extended support program....impressive.
reni-chan@reddit
When I was in secondary school many years ago I used to buy and setup Steam accounts with cs 1.6 for many kids at my school. I was charging 50% extra on top of the normal cs 1.6 listing price for this 'service' lol.
blind_ninja_guy@reddit
That is far more creative than my way of making money in high school. There were plenty of kids with more dollars than cents or whose parents had enough money to just give them a ridiculous allowance. So I'd go to the vending machines and buy flaming Hot Cheetos, and then sell them to kids who are too lazy to get up to go to the machine themselves and I'd sell them for $0.25 more.
Vyo@reddit
I've been doing a volunteering tech thing for the elderly recently and the amount of people coming in with this has been somewhat bizarre, especially considering all you have to do is update to the latest version and like what, 2-3 clicks?
Then again most of my work and income can be summed up as "3 clicks, $ 1 each = $ 3. Knowing where to click = $ 297" >_>
zaro3785@reddit
I assume my work's IT did that without me having to ask ... But now I should check, because you know what they say about assuming
Phoenixtouch@reddit
That sounds like us... lol
Celica_@reddit
I love that that requires knowledge that that's even a thing they can do, without the knowledge to look up one of dozens of guides that would take them through the process step by step
barthvonries@reddit
As long as it concerns electronic devices, people's brain shuts off automatically.
robsterva@reddit
It's been my experience that if people believe they can't understand something, they won't, no matter how you explain it.
Belisarius-1262@reddit
This is undeniably true in my personally experience.
I’m red/green colorblind. It’s not debilitating—I can still tell stoplights apart, for example—but it affects me on a daily basis. I’ve discovered fairly recently that I can’t identify things based on color unless someone reminds me that I can. Color just straight-up does not compute as a possible identifying characteristic. Until someone suggests that it should in that case. Then, I often can tell them apart, though I may not see the color I am being told to look for.
As an example, there were food products I was looking for with blue and pink lids. The blue lid was indistinguishable from another lid in the same area to me, but the pink turned out to be recognizable after I found the name to verify I had the right thing. The second time, I was able to find the pink lid, and then look at the two blue lids to find the name I needed.
Salamiflame@reddit
I'm also red/green colourblind, to a similar extent. And I find this is also something for me, but I notice it most with gaming. In Final Fantasy XIV, for example, there'll be enemy attacks where there's, for example, a blue, yellow, and green indicated area, each of different shapes, and either shape or colour can be used to identify which is safe. My mind never goes to the colour first. Or, and this is actually in a fight that some friends of mine and I have been working on beating, there's stuff where you need to mix elements that people have for those people to block an elemental attack from the rest of the group, and you look at these sort of elemental effects on the ground to see what element needs to be mixed. The effects are either a blue bubbly one for water, a green windy one for wind, or a purple one crackling with electricity. I always use the effect, rather than the colour, to identify first.
TAtalks2waterdragons@reddit
that’s fascinating—brains are so… complex! wild! surprising!
pjshawaii@reddit
The saying, “I can explain it to you, but I can’t understand it for you,” holds true once again.
jonas_ost@reddit
The worst thing i know is when people give up before even trying. They know they are bad with tech so they just dont even bother. Refuse to learn new stuff etc.
CleeBrummie@reddit
"I'm not a computer person" - Arghhh!
Polar_Ted@reddit
Use to drive me crazy. People would call in a problem saying an error popped up. They just fucking close it and never read it. It told you exactly what's wrong!
Moonbeam_Dreams@reddit
As a BMET, yes, this. This x1000 depending on how much education they have. We have a saying that you can make a machine idiot-proof, but you'll never make it nurse-proof.
boli99@reddit
it is difficult to get someone to understand simple instructions when they can get a varying length break from work by claiming not to understand them.
dickcheney600@reddit
Instead of calling something idiot "proof" just say "resistant" so that the universe doesn't see it as a challenge to invent a worse idiot. :)
Loki-L@reddit
It is not reading, it is reading comprehension.
Sometimes it might not even be that.
I have solved problems in the past by asking a user to read and error message out loud to me and then repeating what they just said verbatim back to them.
Things like "It says 'Click Enter to continue', what do I do?" and I say "Click Enter to continue" and they say "Thanks, that worked."
Some people have some sort of mental block that makes them scared and believe technology is more complicated than it is.
Warrangota@reddit
I've set your password to. Enter that, and it will ask you for a new one. Enter that twice and save it.
What does it say?
...
syntaxerror53@reddit
Yet they're experts when it comes to using Social Media.
WearySignature4531@reddit
This is almost every day at work. These old fucks just stare at the printer while it's literally telling you what to do. I'm just like how are you guys making 2x what I make?
Salavora_M@reddit
I once had to track through a meat processing factory (which means dressing up with hair net, shoe covers, and so on and so forth), because the error message on the computer was "too technical"
It said something along the lines of "Tray 2 empty" when the user tried to print. I put new paper in tray 2 and it printed without problems.
Time to get to the printer and then back again: 30min
Time to "repair" the problem: 1min
Some user simply seem to be afraid of technology and/or failed comprehensive reading class. (though this particular printer did not have a nice animation to go with the error. Unsure if it would have helped, but one can hope)
st33p@reddit
You fixed the printer without sacrificing a goat? What kind of dark magic is this?
syntaxerror53@reddit
May be it wasn't a Hell Printer.
Intelligent_Law_5614@reddit
These days, you have to sign up for the printer manufacturer's automatic monthly sacrificial goat restocking program, at $29.95 per month.
Sacrificing last month's goat will not work, as they come with date-coded microchips.
DudeWheresMyBFR@reddit
Don't give them ideas about cartridges with limited shelf life's.
Rathmun@reddit
They already have that idea.
Fritzzy1960M@reddit
You obviously have never experienced a Vampire Printer - usually Mannesman Tally matrix printers, these require a human blood offering - sometimes a small scratch but usually at least the severe pinching of a finger.
Ich_mag_Kartoffeln@reddit (OP)
The darkest, most heinous and perverse dark magic in the universe -- paying attention 😱😱😱😱😱!
GuestStarr@reddit
Sometimes a chicken is sufficient.
neddie_nardle@reddit
Unless it's an Epson, in which case sacrificing a Brother is the only acceptable cure (apparently).
CAShark-7@reddit
Hahahahaha!! (Many) years ago our office got PCs and laser printers. Ooooohhhh! Laser printers! So high tech!
Shortly after they were installed, my boss calls me in, complaining the super duper new printer was smearing her letters. She showed me one a printed letter she had composed and then printed. (You all know where this is going). I asked her to show me how she was printing the document. She selects the document, chooses print, then we both walk over to the printer. Remember these were new laser printers - they were huge and not fast. As the paper inched out, she grabbed it at about the 3/4 mark and waved it at me. "See!" she exclaimed.
So I had to give a short lesson on how laser printers worked. She went back to her desk grumbling.
ozzie286@reddit
I had a copier the other day that was broken. Inside there's a little "finger" that holds the papers to stack them up before depositing the entire job in the tray. Someone got impatient, grabbed their job while the finger was still holding it, and caused the finger to get jammed. It was still holding the top of their pages.
CAShark-7@reddit
I know that finger you're talking about!
FrequentWay@reddit
The one who can read is the king in the kingdom of the illiterate.
Ich_mag_Kartoffeln@reddit (OP)
Or gets burned at the stake as a witch, a heretic, and a smartarse.
BeanieManPresents@reddit
No matter how much you try and make something idiot proof,, there's always a bigger idiot.
MyNameIsZealous@reddit
Don't judge him too harshly, I was born illiterate and spent a good chunk of my youth overcoming that so I can understand how hard it is to read.
SewerHarpies@reddit
And this is how I learned to fix copy machines before Google.
AnDanDan@reddit
We have a large format plotter at my work. If it stops, it has fucking animations of what it wants you to do. 'Open main door, push guide in, use knife to slice paper'. People are completely unable to think through such guided instructions. Or if they end up unloading a roll, unable to consider why shit isnt printing now.
Deblebsgonnagetyou@reddit
It's incredible how many tech support scenarios would never happen if more people would read instructions and not be terrified of anything on a computer not involving a web browser.
Rathmun@reddit
Even involving a web browser, if it's not doing exactly what they ~~expect~~ want.
ozSillen@reddit
The Castle vibes
nippynz@reddit
"Jesus these fucking photocopiers. What the fuck is that!? I cleared tray 3!"
Ich_mag_Kartoffeln@reddit (OP)
How's the serenity?
dreaminginteal@reddit
This, and Google.
Significant_Lynx_827@reddit
This post and allot of the comments reminds me of a bit by Mike Birbiglia where he is telling the story of how he would help fix his relatives computers. One of said relatives exclaimed at one point, marveling at his skill, "wow! you should be a computer scientist", to which came his retort, "oh yeah? well you should be a cave man."
Starfury_42@reddit
No matter how simple you make instructions there are people that won't be able to follow them.
CoderJoe1@reddit
Many people feel too intimidated to even try sometimes. Even if you walk them through it, they'd rather claim ignorance and refuse to even think about it.
kagato87@reddit
The number of "can't print" tickets I've gotten in my days where there was a message on their screen saying "tray empty"...
commentsrnice2@reddit
Have you seen the image of the feed tray where someone put the ream of paper in STILL WRAPPED?
kagato87@reddit
I've seen that done.
Counterpoint-RD@reddit
This, or as a fun variation, "Tray full, remove paper" for long documents... (Otherwise, at a certain point, the last printed page could get shoved somewhere in between out of order, instead of landing on top of the stack, where it's supposed to go, so the print stops, and you get a message essentially meaning "Hey, take that stack out, it's getting a bit much...") Somehow, that throws most people off pretty hard, including myself, the first time 😄 - after that, I've never forgotten...
WesleysHuman@reddit
1 percent of people think, 9 percent of people think they think, and 90 percent of people would rather die than think!
AbaloneMysterious474@reddit
Reminds me of the good old Park Ranger quote.
"Why can't you make 100% bear proof trashcans?"
"We can. But you'd find a significant overlap between the smart bears, and dumb humans"
YouCanShoveYourMagic@reddit
Some people think being technically incompetent is something to be proud of.
Sujynx@reddit
One of our sales guys came over and asked me a question about his iphone. Im an android person myself so i just googled it. 'Oh if i'd known it was google thing i could have done that myself'
Yes. Yes you could
devin1955@reddit
Pretty sad isn't it?
AdreKiseque@reddit
Many such cases
AyamBakarVanilla@reddit
you're wizard, harry!
Kaatochacha@reddit
Our copier at work has a broken door sensor. If you open door A, do what is says, then close door A the machine will still keep screaming to close door A. I figured out you've got to manually put the machine sensor in the door tab before closing it: it's obviously broken off.
You would think I had discovered the Theory of Relativity judging by the comments I got.