Blah, blah, blah...
Posted by ThatBrozillianGuy@reddit | talesfromtechsupport | View on Reddit | 65 comments
This one is from a few years ago, but I just remembered it, and felt I had to share.
So this user calls me early in the morning with a problem:
User: Good morning ThatBrozillianGuy. I'm trying to use this program, but it's giving me an error message, no matter what I do.
Me: Good morning User. Ok, I need you to please read me what the error message says.
User: The operation you're trying to execute is currently unavailable. There is a blah, blah, blah... blah, blah, blah... please contact the account administrator.
Me: User, I need you to read me the entirety of the message, so I can diagnose what the problem is. I'm shure it doesn't read "blah, blah, blah".
User: proceeds to read the message as written.
vaildin@reddit
but of course they'll spend 20 minutes giving you every little detail of their day, as long as none of it is relevant to the actual error.
JeffTheNth@reddit
.....I almost want to have a program do that just for the frustration it could cause ...wait... that could be me... never mind... :D
thi5_i5_my_u5er_name@reddit
To be fair, a lot windows software already does this with its "Something went wrong 0xDEADBEEF" error messages. Most of the time it's no more helpful than blah blah blah.
1Mandolo1@reddit
oH MY GOOD i love that you can actually spell DEADBEEF in hex :D
Furnock@reddit
When you click OK and it’s not OK call me. I’ll make it OK
CheezitsLight@reddit
I have a public Mantis. No one can find the error log to upload it. Every single time. Look in /logs. Try help->logs and then the first entry. Doesn't help.
In the bug splat screen is a prominent Send Error Log button. Along with a box that says "please tell us what you were doing". The number of times someone has filled that in is zero.
I should just send the log no matter what they do. But it's not allowed.
saffer_zn@reddit
Being dangerously computer literature I have a fair understanding of what's needed when logging a ticket but what grinds my gears is when the tech calls and says Oh we hear you have a problem.
Then answer for the fist 5 questions where in my ticket already. If you read it then you would see that yes I did send a screen grab. Yes you do have my IP.
I spent 5mins writing a bullet form order of events that caused the the problem and will repeat the error if followed. Holy hell !
robophile-ta@reddit
commentsrnice2@reddit
My own father did this to me a lot. Which is disappointing because he literally worked in IT. He would tell me to put some info in an email. He would proceed to rapid skim the email, then come ask me questions about the specifics. Specifics I thoroughly laid out IN THE EMAIL. I say “read the email”. -He replies “I did but I need to know X”. I included X, Y, and even Z just in case you were going to ask about it. IN THE EMAIL! If you don’t know X you didn’t read it, you barely glanced at it. -But it’s too long I don’t want to read that. Why did I send an email if you’re going to make me go through it line by line??? It’s literally the exact amount of information you asked for
Geminii27@reddit
Maybe "When you read the part of the email I sent you which has that specific information already in it, what did you think then?" :)
commentsrnice2@reddit
This was me paraphrasing 60 different similar exchanges. The wording won’t change the outcome
Geminii27@reddit
Ah. I was trying to come up with something which implied that of COURSE he had done that minor thing before coming to you, it would be stupid if he hadn't.
I may or may not have used something similar on certain callers...
commentsrnice2@reddit
You underestimate a narcissists ability to make everything your problem instead of theirs
kswilson68@reddit
I used to do coding (started out with ASCII Basic) and I remember having to literally read through thousands of lines of code looking for misplaced or mistyped commas, periods, or a lower case when it should upper case (forget about common spelling errors).
bruce_desertrat@reddit
"What does the message say?"
"It's just computer gibberish! I don't know any of that!"
( Upon trudging to their office, the error was "Insufficient space on $E to save the document."
The user had filled up their USB thumb drive where they saved everything because 'I don't trust that server stuff'. Also user comes to our office in a panic some months later because "It says this is bad! I have EVERYTHING on there" and hands me the same USB drive, only now corrupted.)
ZanderArch@reddit
I work with someone like this. They do something, an error message pops up, they click okay instantly, then start crying that it isn't working.
I almost bit my tongue off to stop myself from shouting a Boondocks reference at them.
Mx_Reese@reddit
I run into that problem with people who are asking for technical help on this website way too many times every day. It's always like pulling teeth to get them to actually paste the error message instead of badly summarizing it. Everybody from people installing video game mods to newbie self-taught programmers. Drives me up a wall.
Had one yesterday where somebody posted a photo of their computer screen showing an error message that said to check a log file, with the file path to find the log file, to see the full error message. That's all the information they decided to share. When asked if they had read the log file, they said yes and offered only a summarization exactly like the one in your story where all of the important details were left out. Surely it takes longer to badly summarize an error message than it does to copy and paste it. I also find it disturbing that only approximately one and a half generations ever learned how to take a screenshot on a computer, and that has somehow become lost knowledge.
commentsrnice2@reddit
It helped when there was a simple icon on the tray you could click but then windows decided to hide it. Like you know that tool that was super simple to use? We merged it with another arbitrarily selected program and named it something weird like “sniff & snip”. Why did we do this? flips you the double bird
Zestyclose_Bug9255@reddit
Just hit PrtScn
rosierho@reddit
Yeah, but you'd be surprised how many keyboard manufacturers seem to decide this useful little button is unnecessary and either leave it off or make it a difficult to decipher soft key combo
FriendlyBrother9660@reddit
And the message had clear instructions on how to resolve the issue.
ThatBrozillianGuy@reddit (OP)
That I can't recall. But most certainly, yeah.
thatkindofdoctor@reddit
Imagine living in a country with 46%, reading comprehension on THIRD GRADE STUDENTS. Now imagine the median QI of that country is 83.
TonicAndDjinn@reddit
It did:
kaelthasw3@reddit
"...wait until the current operation ends. If the feature is still unavailable..."
Mx_Reese@reddit
At least nine times out of 10 it feels like
K1yco@reddit
A few weeks ago I had to keep telling the person on the phone to read me exactly what it said on the screen, and it's like they never bothered to learn to read.
They would read the first word and then once the next word hit, it was like they were reading klingon. At one point they kept saying tech shoot, and after asking them a few times, turns out the word was troubleshoot.
akaWhitey2@reddit
Legit, a ton of people don't know how to read. Or if they do, cannot read out loud.
I really blame the reading programs that don't teach basic phonics and lead to kids not truly learning to read.
‘It Hurts Kids’: Many schools continue to teach controversial reading remediation program https://share.google/6funiAM7t7H0jP5Gl
Candid_Ad5642@reddit
Been there, done that
Only the user insisted the error message was Greek gibberish, so she didn't bother keeping it, and will instantly OK out the message if it appears
Or user helpfully grabbing a screenshot by hitting print screen, on a dual monitor setup, pasting this into word, that helpfully scales down the picture and then fixes resolution to match, and then the user email the resulting word document. Yes, you can still reqognize that this is an error message, but it's too grainy to reqognize any of the letters
MusicBrownies@reddit
I still understood it, but the letter 'c' on your keyboard when clicked changes it to a 'q'.
(Sorry - not a big deal but I notice misspelled words...)
DoneWithIt_66@reddit
At least they were able to clearly tell you exactly how much effort they put into resolving the issue
bonzodmunky@reddit
“Oh, hey! The other day o got an error message on my computer when I was doing something, but I don’t remember what it said. Or what I was doing.”
Awlson@reddit
I think it might have been in the morning, maybe. Or was it right after lunch. Hmmm. I am sure it was on Tuesday, because it was raining. Or maybe it was Monday...
JasTHook@reddit
...on a dark sunlit night
RayEd29@reddit
This is EXACTLY the crap that drives me up the wall when I'm trying to help someone. I've never had it happen like this but it's the same mentality. I get a screenshot cropped down to just the error message and, even then, not the full description showing with the ever so helpful guidance of "It's not working".
Okay, first off - WHAT is not working? Your screenshot doesn't show what application you were running. What were you trying to do? What did you expect to happen? What actually happened? I need more than "It's broken" in order to help you.
Geminii27@reddit
Also, I am not telepathic and I do not know every single workflow in your team or your personal choices of processes.
ThatBrozillianGuy@reddit (OP)
Indeed, that's just as frustrating!
Mate, it's not like I'm charging you per pixel you send me on that image. Just screenshot the whole damn screen!
Bonus raging when it's a picture of the screen, from the oil smeared lenses of a mobile.
redhairarcher@reddit
I'm still waiting for the first user to send me a screenshot including the details (and not just the big DETAILS button) without asking.
Ecs05norway@reddit
I usually just remote in when they do that. Or ask them to teams me a screenshot of the error.
fshannon3@reddit
You "blah, blah, blahed" over the best part!
harrywwc@reddit
"I don't say 'blah-blah-blah'!"
maruca_scully@reddit
no, OP mentioned the bisque
Superspudmonkey@reddit
Me: What does the error say.
Them: I don't know, error
Me: Do it again
Them: (Does it again)
Me: What did it say
Them: I don't know, I clicked it away it was an error and it still doesn't work.
LLPF2@reddit
So you've tried to help my mom too I see.
oolaroux@reddit
Aha! I know that error. You need to update the yada yada plugin.
fresh-dork@reddit
had that with a coworker just today:
CW: this script doesn't run, i'm going to heave to tear it all down and start over
me: read me the error it's spitting out
CW: unable to validate ssh key
Trin959@reddit
I have a customer that's mostly been pretty good about recording errors. Some users write it down, some screenshot, and some just send phone pics. They had one user for a while, though, who wouldn't do any of that, no matter how many times I said, "Something like..." doesn't cut it. I finally told her that if a problem isn't important enough for you to record, it isn't important enough for me to even talk about. Made my life easier.
babarock@reddit
Screen recording and shots saved me many hours trying to diagnose application problems over the years.
jamoche_2@reddit
We had QA people swear that they’d listed all the steps they’d done in their manual testing. I’d bounce it with a request for a screen recording and gosh, between steps 3 and 4 they’d clicked on something else, which changed everything. Finally made a rule that all manual testing bug reports had to include a screen recording, with the option on to show mouse clicks. And these were people who got paid to do this.
dreaminginteal@reddit
Oh, those bug reports drove me bonkers! Leaving out several things they did in the repro steps.
Also the "repeatability: 3/3" when all they did was get into the error state and then redo the last command another two times. THAT'S NOT REPRODUCING THE ACTUAL ERROR!
And the other massively irritating one was where they used commands not available to users in order to directly manipulate data structures and then something broke... At least that one would say that they did manipulate those data structures.
jamoche_2@reddit
Ooh! That reminds me of the time they got into a power-user state, removed the VMDK file, clicked "OK" on three different (but much more polite) dialogs, including the very obvious "your VM is missing a VMDK, either put it back or make a new one but not both or you will fuck up your VM", did both, and then filed a bug because their VM was fucked up. We put all the VM files into a file bundle for a reason!
MisfitHula@reddit
Easily resolved with: "Hey, can you email me a screenshot."
ThatBrozillianGuy@reddit (OP)
Senior user man (60+). He'd rather close the program and wait for whatever he needed done to miraculously get done (a.k.a. someone else take care of it), than learn how to e-mail a screenshot.
I just got out of a video call with another senior to whom I had to point where the paper goes on a printer.
fshannon3@reddit
...or the user's idea of a screenshot would be to take a picture with their phone camera and email that.
PlatypusDream@reddit
That could actually be helpful though
Mx_Reese@reddit
Sometimes but often when I get those photos they're either so out of focus or have somehow undergone such extreme jpg compression that the text on the screen is completely unreadable. The worst one is when they shoot a video of the screen with their phone and it makes me motion sick because the camera is shaking like they tried to emulate The Blair Witch.
androshalforc1@reddit
Nah they would take a picture, print it off (in greyscale) from a printer that should have had it’s toner changed 2 months ago, scan it, then email it.
Moneia@reddit
Although they'd be another ticket asking how to attach the picture to an e-mail...
Hot-Win2571@reddit
A screenshot on an 8x10 photo with arrows and circles and a descriptive paragraph on the back.
PlatypusDream@reddit
"8x10 color glossy photographs with circles & arrows and a paragraph on the back of each one explaining what each one was, to be used as evidence against us."
No, I have never listened to the ballad of Alice's Restaurant 😏
12stringPlayer@reddit
To be used as evidence against them.
deeseearr@reddit
*shudder*
I once supported a nice, easy, impossible to misuse web interface that built and ran database queries.
Naturally, the queries that it ran weren't always what the users wanted them to be, so they would come to me saying "Hey, the query I ran wasn't right. Fix it!"
At that point I had to ask, "Well, what query was it?" and then try to look it up in the logs. And they couldn't always tell me, so I started adding session IDs and eventually a complete copy of the SQL statement in the output. They would still tell me that something went wrong but not include any of the debugging information, so I made a note of asking them to always send me a copy of exactly what they saw on the screen. Just select it, copy it, and paste it into the email so that I could read it and provide them with the help they wanted.
So... they started taking screenshots. Of the first 10% of the query, and the first ten lines of results. Everything else was off-screen.
"Isn't that what you wanted?"
Moneia@reddit
Why would you think that?
They've already found following simple instructions too onerous.
ChatahoocheeRiverRat@reddit
I once had a user tell me "I got an error message a couple of days ago that said 'error number something, something, blah blah blah, so I clicked the button to go back to the thing'".
Somehow I couldn't troubleshoot that.
dog2k@reddit
"last week i was doing something and i saw an error message. i don't remember what i was working on or what computer i was using and i didn't read the message. what happened?" Every freakin week.
"if you ignore the customers long enough, they eventually go away"