The man that's always 2nd (idk if thats nsfw tell me)

There was once a man who was always second in everything, no matter what this was. One day, he went on a chess tournament, he didnt know chess, but git second place. He also one day ran a marathon, he just walked but he was still faster than almost everyone and got 2nd place. He once went to a math competition, failing math at school (second person to fail ofc), he won 2nd place. He wanted to be 1st in the most amount of 2nd places but he got 2nd place as well since there's apparently a guy who got way more. He was tired of that and he decided to kill himself, he stood on a roof when he saw a policeman, to avoid talking with him he jumped. When he hit the ground the policeman said: "eh come on... that's the second one today".