Everyone should own a Gorilla costume, in case of emergencies.

I love mine. Nobody knows it’s me which feels like invisibility, and it sets off a primordial fear in many people. I used to bound about in it, then I realised it’s plenty scary even when I just walk normally. One Halloween I was with the kids and I scared a bunch of women in a beauty salon. They ran to the back and cowered, screaming. So I took off the gorilla head and they calmed down, Then one lady said “You made me PEE myself!!!” Me and the kids laughed all the way home!