TheaterFire

My doctor is amazed by my level of fitness.

Posted by AuthorSarge@reddit | Jokes | View on Reddit | 15 comments

Actually, what he said was, "I could have sworn you would be dead by now."

Reply to Post

15 Comments

Content-Afternoon-89@reddit

Richard Simmons is dead Willy Nelson is 100 years old. I’m a picture of health.
View on Reddit #61883459

sherriffflood@reddit

Sat down at the doctor’s office and he said ‘impressive legs’. ‘Er thanks’ I said. ‘I was talking about the chair’ he replied
View on Reddit #61813580

Valuable-Paramedic93@reddit

Said this to a fat lady dancing on the table at the bar
View on Reddit #61869881

dirtybird971@reddit

I went to the doctors recently. He said: “Don’t eat anything fatty” I said: “Like what, bacon and burgers?” He said: “No fatty, don’t eat anything.”
View on Reddit #61814125

Jess_with_an_h@reddit

-Gary Delaney ;) credit where credit is due
View on Reddit #61861192

thehumbinator@reddit

My doctor is actually really nice, he calls me weekly telling me I have outstanding balance.
View on Reddit #61852266

cooscoos3@reddit

I’m into fitness. Fitness whole pizza in my belly.
View on Reddit #61848825

RamamohanS@reddit

Guess I’m the healthiest corpse he’s ever seen.
View on Reddit #61847587

choochootrainyippee@reddit

I went to the doctors and he asked me how often I go to the gym. “Two times.” Doc: “Two times per day? week? month?” Me: “I have given my answer.”
View on Reddit #61846481

Labudism@reddit

As the doctor placed the stethoscope to my chest they exclaimed "Wow, I can tell you work really hard" I replied: "wow, thanks!" They said: "I was talking to your heart"
View on Reddit #61828375

jcmatthews66@reddit

My doctor told me my blood pressure was off the charts! I was like SWEET!
View on Reddit #61825890

sohereiamacrazyalien@reddit

more like salty!!!!!
View on Reddit #61827487

PinkLuver_771@reddit

The saddest part of this "joke" is that I have lived this with 3 different doctors and several more nurses after sitting down with them explaining all of my issues. There are more issues now due to their lack of help...
View on Reddit #61819259

apex_pretador@reddit

I'm in the same boat as you, except it's been over 20 doctors.
View on Reddit #61821191

Waitsfornoone@reddit

When you doctor has to resort to swearing, you're not in a good place.
View on Reddit #61807919