Two bored male casino dealers are waiting at the craps table. A very attractive blond woman arrives and bets $20,000 on a single roll of the dice
Posted by Eggelari@reddit | Jokes | View on Reddit | 35 comments
She says, “I hope you don’t mind, but I feel much luckier when I’m completely nude.” With that, she strips down, rolls the dice, and yells, “Come on, baby, Mama needs new clothes!” As the dice come to a stop she jumps up and down and squeals, “YES! YES! I WON, I WON!”
She hugs each of the dealers, picks up her winnings and her clothes, and quickly departs. The dealers stare at each other dumbfounded. Finally, one of them asks, “What did she roll?” The other answers, “I don’t know—I thought you were watching.”
petantic@reddit
I think they were distracted by her tits.
AreYouFilmingNow@reddit
They both were watching.
Geebert1@reddit
Yeah, that's the joke.
randallnewton@reddit
Different crime, but it rhymes. Beautiful woman robs a bank wearing a sheer blouse. Police ask the teller for a description. "All I remember is a pair of 38s pointed at me."
Any_Pudding1541@reddit
Blond = masculine
Blonde = feminine
Born4thJuly@reddit
Yes. 2 genders. Good job
Any_Pudding1541@reddit
Lmao if you could put two facts together you’d understand why i made that comment
Nightgardener@reddit
Actually, if you're woke, it's blondx. /s
EirHc@reddit
It's funny that the english language mostly does away with grammatical gender, but we can still find remnants of it here and there, like with blond / blonde.
GaryG7@reddit
I'm sure they were making sure she didn't use her own dice.
SrMariguano@reddit
Somebody tell me where this casino is at? No front door security. No cameras.
Githyerazi@reddit
And who in Vegas cares about nudity enough to get distracted?
Worried_Click_4559@reddit
The casino was in Peoria, IL. (?)
Githyerazi@reddit
Lol, I forget that there's a lot of casinos that are not in Vegas.
ovrlrd1377@reddit
One could say with complete certainty that casinos are either in Vegas or not in Vegas
youmfkersneedjesus@reddit
What about the one that's right on the city line, half in Vegas half not in it.
ovrlrd1377@reddit
Half is, half isn't, so it stands
Ezra611@reddit
I dunno, I just saw a pair.
AverageDemocrat@reddit
I was shocked when she went down on all fours
Total-Khaos@reddit
I should have played the come bet...
AverageDemocrat@reddit
Hard ways, heavy on the 6
Any_Contract_1016@reddit
Where was the stick man? S/He's supposed to watch the dice.
Western_Ad_6190@reddit
Fallacy. Stick man watches the shooter's hand as the dice are released. Base dealer at the end where the dice land watch the dice as they arrive at their end of the table. Stick man picks up the dice visually after insuring the shooter has an empty hand. If there's no stick man (as a third, non-base dealer), the base dealer opposite the shooter's end watchers the hand and the base dealer on the shooter's end watchers the dice land. Most games that would allow a bet that large would have three dealers and a boxman, and if an attractive woman stripped down to her birthday suit there would likely also be a pit boss and possibly a floorman. And most of this crew would still be watching the shooter!
Amazing_Moose1818@reddit
Everyone assume she lost and faked because she was blonde and nude.
Plot twist. She really did win.
ROBAG77@reddit
It appears the dealers are blond rather than bored.
NewGuy-1964@reddit
Alternate ending:
As she's led away in handcuffs, she shakes her head in disgust and mutters, "gays!"
DmtTraveler@reddit
But the dealers have to hand out the winnings based on knowing what you rolled.
KillaDaKlown@reddit
They weren't watching the, PIPS.
Dependent-Tax-7088@reddit
Ha ha. Good one!
Yeyati_Nafrey@reddit
It really a dicey game
luvinthislife@reddit
Before she left, she first racked her chips.
jonorrhea357@reddit
I was watching her shake her dice. Then I was watching her shake her DD-dice.
Bemxuu@reddit
I’ve heard this same joke with a different punchline:
“I don’t even know what number she bet on.”
ThriceFive@reddit
I only saw her rolling snake eyes.
SlimeYT_R@reddit
Haha, I really love this one!