What's the difference between being hungry and being horny?
Posted by BEANIOT@reddit | Jokes | View on Reddit | 61 comments
It depends on where you put the cucumber.
Posted by BEANIOT@reddit | Jokes | View on Reddit | 61 comments
It depends on where you put the cucumber.
Euphoric-Fix1027@reddit
You can buy food legally.
rollduptrips@reddit
“It depends on” screws up the joke because what you mean is “determines” not “depends”.
“Where you put the cucumber” is the better punchline.
SilverPurse@reddit
Yessssssssssss
Was looking for this. So annoying having to come so far down to find it 😂
humperty@reddit
It depends on where you 'had' put the cucumber. The cucumber is assumed to be in the past.
omerta_notme@reddit
Same thing lol
Waitsfornoone@reddit
... or the carrot.
remasteration@reddit
...or the eggplant.
LarryCraigSmeg@reddit
Or the pineapple
nopop40@reddit
Or a pear cactus
MrEldo@reddit
Or a porcupine
nopop40@reddit
You mean a gay porcupine in a wheelchair because then it would also be a vegetable and or a fruit?
chaossdragon@reddit
Paige… No!
JLobodinsky@reddit
Or the gerbil
Zaphodnotbeeblebrox@reddit
Or the watermelon
n0tmyearth@reddit
AND MY AXE!
G_D_Ironside@reddit
GROND!
Chris5858580@reddit
That may be unhealthy
gabriell1024@reddit
Watermelons are healthy.
Slic'em, cut'em, chop'em stick them in your ass !
BeMoreKnope@reddit
No one here is gonna suggest a hot apple pie?
Settle-for-more@reddit
or the eggplant, I guess
Wholesomelackof@reddit
Ends up in your guts in both situations
Advanced_Parsnip@reddit
One way will require a lot of force, the other may require chewing.
humperty@reddit
A neat trick is being both hungry and horny.
sparant76@reddit
You could also try spinning. That’s a neat trick.
Amphoblente@reddit
Check out @susi_vidal on YouTube, the innuendos are on point!
RilianXI@reddit
I can see someone going to a grocery store and purchasing a suspiciously large cucumber and when they get a look from the cashier just saying: “look, I’m hungry AND horny, okay?”
wisely88@reddit
Be careful, Caligula tried combining the 2 and look what happened there
Side note: George also attempted this
AoiEsq@reddit
The Trifecta
wisely88@reddit
I tried it but I couldn't focus with the TV on
sparant76@reddit
Changes where you put the cucumber. Or it affects. It doesn’t depend on. You don’t get hungry by putting a cucumber in your mouth.
zesteee@reddit
I don’t know, but stay the hell away from my refrigerator!
roy107@reddit
r/unexpectedfriends
laFidelCastro@reddit
Its dry anyway
simazie@reddit
You probably wanna meat in both, but different kinds of meat in each one
TobleroneTy@reddit
The letters between H and y
AubadeMX74@reddit
I can't rub my tummy to no longer be hungry...
Voltaire420@reddit
Diogenes reference
Future-Setting-7170@reddit
You eat nonetheless
ToQuoteSocrates@reddit
When you are a Haitian it depends on what pussy you eat?
geoff_the_hound@reddit
Do you ever smell someone's armpits or feet or hair and get hungry. Like your stomach rumbles? Sometimes when I make out with people I can taste there food preferences and drug choices.
Strong_Deer_3075@reddit
Boss at work always said his steakhouse working girl friend tasted like steak.
quinn_peter@reddit
What you do with the chicken. I will answer no further questions!!
G_D_Ironside@reddit
Where exactly one will be “eating out”.
Cable-Careless@reddit
I read that in "Snape voice." Quotations are so that you don't think that I am stupid.
tonydownfiles1@reddit
Depends on what type of cream pie you’re craving for
mo-sanity@reddit
I believe both situations ask for a fill up
Brilliant_Rip7606@reddit
It depends how you cut the grapefruit 🤣
Virtual_Force_4398@reddit
What comes to mind when I say breasts?
pichiquito@reddit
Either way it’s always nice to toss the salad
SmokinHotNot@reddit
How you scratch the itch.
blotditto@reddit
If my **** Ia in your mouth you're hungry?
PotatoSaladHater@reddit
My sister caught me masturbating with a cucumber one time. What a shame cause she ate a carrot. Or now she tastes like ranch dressing. No... She ate my butthole.
Oh, I caught my sister masturbating with my cucumber. And I was going to eat that later. But now it tastes like dad.
remasteration@reddit
r/ihadastroke
TnBluesman@reddit
It determines where you put the cucumber.
Simplejames16@reddit
The size of the cucumber
rob_allshouse@reddit
One's deep and long, the other fast and repeated.
(https://www.lifeprint.com/asl101/pages-signs/h/hungry.htm)
Wraith_Crescent@reddit
Only a cucumber is enough to fulfil your hunger but it’s not the same case for other
wisely88@reddit
It's never enough, never
::slowly walks away with my head down in shame::
msdtflip@reddit
How much you chew before you swallow.
Stannoth@reddit
For the similarity, I propose you a nut
Shadp9@reddit
I was going to say "how many bananas you need."