How do Danish and Swedish people differ? And compared to the Dutch?
Posted by EffectiveEggplant787@reddit | expats | View on Reddit | 55 comments
About 10 years ago I was chosing a study abroad location. Mostly focused on Scandinavia, Belgium and the Netherlands. I went with the Netherlands but the more I discover about Swedish and Danish culture the more I feel like I made the wrong choice. I think Danish and Swedish food is actually better than typical Dutch food (the one not sourced by immigrants and the colonies, think stamppot). And I prefer their music as well.
I've yet to go there but I wonder how are the Swedes and Danes different from the Dutch? And what about between themselves?
From a distance I get the feeling they're equally or even more reserved than Dutch people. And yet I also feel they're more about social harmony and politeness. The Dutch have a way of being too direct at all times. I had a Swedish boss one and I liked it that he was polite even though I never really knew what he truly felt. But that's a common theme in my culture (Bulgarian) anyway except bosses here allow themselves to be more direct as we're hierarchical. But on job interviews they often act like you aced it & they liked you only to dismiss you an hour later. Anyway, is it true that Scandinavians avoid too much directness? And how do Danes differ from Swedes in terms of politeness, valuing social harmony etc?
Jealous-Buffalo-7091@reddit
I've lived in Sweden for 35 years, I'm 37 year old guy from the Balkans. Lived in Skåne almost all my life. What I can say is that for me personally Danes are better at the social game. To me they feel much more closer to South European culture. More open minded, not so stuck up like Swedes. Sure Swedes in Skåne are a lot different than Stockholmers which are really stuck up.
Like i said I've lived here almost all my life but I will never understand how a country that cherish individualism yet still manage to be so in line with the mainstream.
Never stand out
Never think you are better
People even dress the same
When I go to Denmark I can notice right away people are more unique. it's like people have their own individual style. In Sweden it's like copy+paste.
I've never worked in Denmark but I really don't like the work culture(In some parts) here in Sweden. I've work with Germans and it is soooo much easier. You know it's straight to the business with the Germans. With Swedes you need to talk about the weather and bs for 10 minutes before even starting anything constructive.
And never should you bring up the negative things even if asked from the boss if you have anything you want to complain/give negative thoughts about. It's like you are programmed to think stuff is good even if they aren't. Which is really bad to be honest. No one dears to speak out their mind.
GodspeedHarmonica@reddit
Scandinavians are their own group of people and different from pretty much everyone else. But they are similar to each other. I’ve lived many years as an expat in both Sweden and Denmark. Similarities:
Expect to be lonely both places. Friends are usually people they’ve known since school. Friendships of 20-30 years are totally normal. They will be polite and show interest in you when meeting you at a party or social event, but when the event is over, you’ll likely be out of their minds.
They are reserved. Swedes more than Danes, but don’t expect any small talking with strangers or random politeness. If they interact with a stranger it’s because they have a reason to.
They have a strong trust and loyalty to the system. They don’t appreciate people getting out of line. Don’t stand out.
Differences:
Self image. Swedes love being “lagom”. Right in the middle. They don’t see themselves as the best in the world and not the worst. Being in the middle is perfect. They actually take some pride in being a bit boring. Denmark believes they are the best at everything. And nothing can stop them. They don’t hold back even if can get embarrassing at time. Pride or foolishness? I don’t know. And don’t you dare tell them something about Denmark isn’t good. This is also shown in the constant underlying racism in Denmark that doesn’t exist in Sweden. If you are an expat, no matter how integrated you are or how perfect you speak the language, you will always be seen as second class compared to Danes.
These mindsets are shown in everything from how businesses are run, politics, education.
Another great difference is the geography. If you enjoy nature you should know that Denmark is totally flat and filled with fields. Sweden has pretty much everything from mountains, forest and lakes.
squidbattletanks@reddit
For real, if you criticize Denmark or say you want to move abroad people here act as if you personally offended them.
Jealous-Buffalo-7091@reddit
That is nothing special for Denmark :) Try doing this in the Balkans. :D
VictoriaSobocki@reddit
Yup
Practical-Agent6674@reddit
People feel offended when you say their country sucks. How weird!
VictoriaSobocki@reddit
Not really in other countries though
Kind-Message-2727@reddit
But it is personally offending them so your comment makes no sense.
Btw, that was meant as a personal offence so throw your basement hissy fit like a true marxist.
VictoriaSobocki@reddit
True
dallyan@reddit
Sweden sounds exactly like Switzerland except Switzerland is definitely racist.
AmphibianObjective21@reddit
is it bad?
Kind-Message-2727@reddit
Says the marxist.
Putrid_Signature1019@reddit
As a swede i gotta say that people from the west coast and skåne are definitely more outgoing than people from stockholm and the surrounding area. When you talk about swedes its like you talk only about the people from stockholm
Kind-Message-2727@reddit
"This is also shown in the constant underlying racism in Denmark that doesn’t exist in Sweden."
Bwahahaha, you marxists are sick.
EffectiveEggplant787@reddit (OP)
Gee, Denmark sounds a lot like Austria, except it's flat.
EUblij@reddit
Sounds virtually the same as the Netherlands.
Nvrmnde@reddit
Oof I feel seen. The 20 year friendhips are true. Those are closer than siblings and sometimes closer than spouses.
Dangerous-Ad-1298@reddit
so basically Denmark is the same as the netherlands haha
squidbattletanks@reddit
I’m kind of curious as to why you find Danish and Swedish food better than Dutch food. I don’t know what Dutch people typically eat, but the cuisine here in Denmark is mostly bland dishes consisting of meat and potatoes. Not really the most exciting food. Danish baked goods and pastries are great though.
wearelev@reddit
Meat and potatoes are pretty much the food of every north European country from the Netherlands to Russia.
AmphibianObjective21@reddit
Russia has nothing to do with Northern countries
EUblij@reddit
.........bland food consisting of meat and potatoes? Perfect description of Dutch food.
squidbattletanks@reddit
Lmao, all Northern European countries seem to have the same bland cuisine of meat and potatoes😅
EffectiveEggplant787@reddit (OP)
Sweden and Denmark seem to consume more Salmon and shrimps than the Dutch, for sure.
EUblij@reddit
I am no fan of bitterballen. And hear hear to Indian and Indonesian, though the Dutch adulterate even Eastern recipes to appeal to mild flavor preferences here.
Anecdote. I am a lover of hot sausage. Have searched for such a thing in NL for 12 years. Nothing yet.
Kind-Message-2727@reddit
Lol, the Dutch are known for loving spicy food and adding sambal to everything. Try again, dear.
Epixibsy@reddit
I would chose bitterballen over köttbullar every day! I do not think there is a massive difference in food between NL and DK. Most danish dishes fit in really well with dutch cuisine and the other way around. I would say the choise in what you can buy in supermarkets is way more limited in DK than it is in NL. Dutch have a bigger selection in vegetables and a bigger choice in 'exotic' food (say indonesian/surinam etc)
EffectiveEggplant787@reddit (OP)
To each their own.✌ Most of us Bulgarians, Greeks and Turks would obviously go for köttbular. Not that bitterballen are bad. I loved them and the flat cookies the most of all local non-exotic food.
It's a given that the NL would have a better exotic/Asian-inspired selection. But the local indigenous "White Dutch" food is blander to me than the Danish and Swedish analogs for sure.
Kind-Message-2727@reddit
"Most of us Bulgarians, Greeks and Turks" Nobody asked you.
squidbattletanks@reddit
For real, Danish supermarkets suck. One of the best parts of traveling abroad is getting to see proper supermarkets with a much better selection of products.
Kind-Message-2727@reddit
Lol no, bitterballen are superior. Try again.
needsausernaim@reddit
I like this clip that explains Dutch food in a nutshell
https://www.reddit.com/r/Netherlands/s/ai78GKeUzz
rep4me@reddit
Most every European is repressed and unfriendly. They only get nice in Italy and Greece and anywhere south of that. They're also racist and culturally insular. The Swedes are good with welcoming other cultures but unfortunately their kindness has led to crime and other problems. Danes are basically tribal in the way they view others. They don't even like other Scandinavians.
Kind-Message-2727@reddit
Why so salty? Is your country poor?
rep4me@reddit
Lol not you a month later trying to come back with this comment when I never mentioned money
Professional_Elk_489@reddit
Cmon Spanish are super lovely people. They are like the Thais of Europe - positive energy, smiling, radiating in the sun. Italians are nice people, English & Irish are repressed but friendly
EffectiveEggplant787@reddit (OP)
The Andalusians I've met for sure are amazing! I even though they must be from Latin America and not from Spain, that's how friendly they were! But the people from Madrid I've met are frosty.
I'd say the friendliest in Europe are probably the Portuguese, Romanians, Southern Spaniards and the Portuguese (based on personal encounters). Southern Italians, Southern Spanish and the Portuguese also act the least racist towards Eastern Europeans. I never felt judged negatively due to my Bulgarian origin by any Portuguese, Southern Italian or Andalusian I've met.
The Greeks are friendly only if you're a tourist IMHO and probably in small towns on some islands. Athens locals would stare at you but aren't particularly welcoming. Portugal and Romania are often voted the friendliest countries in Europe (InterNations expat polls). Greeks are more chauvinist than the Portuguese and the Romanians, they think just about anyone else is culturally inferior to them.
Kind-Message-2727@reddit
Every single thing you wrote is a lie.
Kind-Message-2727@reddit
Ew, no.
katalyna78@reddit
This is a very surface level comment, I've lived in The Netherlands and visited Stockholm for a week. In Stockholm I was amazed by how attractive everyone was. The slightly less attractive stood out, rather than the opposite, which is usual, IME. I haven't been to Denmark to compare.
It's an n-of-one, nevertheless!
Kind-Message-2727@reddit
Swedish people aren't attractive.
sironamoon@reddit
This is not directly related to the culture as you asked but.. Sweden has one of the best maternity+parental leave schemes and child support in the world (I'd say along with Germany). In the Netherlands, maternity leave sucks and childcare is practically unaffordable for the middle class. I'd definitely look into these conditions if you're planning to have a family in one of these countries.
Kind-Message-2727@reddit
Well, I do tend to judge countries solely on their maternity amd parental schemes.
Btw, how are you overlords in China doing?
Kraknoix007@reddit
If you wanted good food, Belgium is like the netherlands but better, we have more french influence.
Kind-Message-2727@reddit
Lol, the french influence makes you worse than shit.
boa_m@reddit
I am Norwegian and live in Netherlands. The Dutch are really similar to the Danes, especially Amsterdam/Copenhagen are basically twins. They are both loud and friendly, with a liberal drinking culture. :P Biggest difference from Nordics is that the Dutch are really individualistic, more capitalistic and def not conflict shy. Scandinavians are direct and straightforward too, but the Dutch has an attitude of it “well it’s my opinion and it’s your own fault for being offended”. The Danes are known to be the least politically correct of all the Nordics but they are not that bad. The Dutch don’t have the Jante Law and lack social democrat values. It’s kind of Americanised here too, lots of trends and attitudes from TV. The Dutch are egalitarian but there are way more obvious social differences than in Nordics, maybe because the country is so small and over-populated, the extremes are more visible?
Epixibsy@reddit
As a dutch living in Denmark I will say that Dutch and Danish are very alike. I do agree that the Dutch seem to have a bit more aversion for rules.
I do see your point of the dutch being a bit more individualistic and capitalistic, though I do think this is mainly true in the 'randstad area', and less so in other parts of the country. So I guess it depends a bit on what you are comparing it with.
I would say they do, it is very simular to the dutch version of 'doe normaal'
EffectiveEggplant787@reddit (OP)
Thanks, I appreciate the insider view!
Milksop21@reddit
Danes are less cucked than Swedes judging solely by immigration policies
Cevohklan@reddit
If it ain't Dutch, it ain't much
EUblij@reddit
Regret is a wasted emotion.
NothingIsEverEnough@reddit
There is a halfbreed called Skåningar. We bind the two together
satedrabbit@reddit
The cultures are very similar overall, but to highlight a few differences;
Immigration: Danes see the Swedes as ignoring the realities of unhindered migration from the middle east, and the Swedes see the Danes as more openly racist. Things are changing in Sweden though, causing the gap between the countries to narrow (rise of the Sweden Democrats).
Nordic reservedness and stoicism: The further north you go, the more stoic, quiet and reserved the people will be. Danes are the most open of the Scandinavian countries.
Directness: Swedes are more politically correct, while Danes are more direct and blunt/inelegant. For example, the perpetrator of a crime - Danish: Gerningsmand Swedish: Gerningsperson. The Swedish term is gender neutral, while the Danish term indicates that a man did it.
From a Danish perspective, I'd say the most similar cultures are: Norwegian > Dutch > Swedish > Finnish/Icelandic > Scottish/Welsh > Faroese > Belgian/Luxemburgish/English > Germany/Swiss/Austrian
FixInteresting4476@reddit
They are really pretty much the same but like to fight each other. Lol
EffectiveEggplant787@reddit (OP)
I was first more thinking about Sweden but The Eagle & Sommerdahl made me take notice of Denmark.
I don't know how TV shows like these show the real life there at all but I'd sure prefer living among such people than the ones seen on Dutch or German TV shows, frankly. :P