If someone calls someone else "posh," is that a compliment or insult?
Posted by SaveMeWakeMeUp@reddit | AskUK | View on Reddit | 107 comments
I've heard people use this term and based on tone in each circumstance, sometimes it seemed like a compliment and other times an insult.
As an American, still trying to decode all things British...
EUskeptik@reddit
The origin of posh is interesting - at least I think it is.
In the days of the British Empire, long before aviation was a thing, British people used to travel to the eastern colonies by ship. The voyages were long and hot, and there was no air conditioning. The most desirable accommodation on the ship was on the side facing north, meaning that - unlike cabins that faced the south - there was no direct sunshine so the cabins were cooler and thus more comfortable.
Naturally, these cooler cabins were in greater demand and shipping lines could charge much higher prices. On the outward (eastbound) journey the more desirable cabins were on the left side. On the return (westbound) journey they were on the right side. Left is port, right is starboard.
So the term developed: Port Out, Starboard Home. The acronym was P.O.S.H.
The P.O.S.H. cabins were used by wealthier people. They became known as ‘posh’ people.
Hope this helps….
-##-
Artificial100@reddit
Apart from one quick Google says this is pretty much just a story and there’s no evidence to back it up.
EUskeptik@reddit
Sorry to disappoint you, but it’s 100% true.
My family was in the shipping industry for many generations. Various family members worked for Cunard, White Star and Elder Dempster lines, also in shipbuilding and chandlery going back to before Titanic days.
I suggest you stick your Google search where the sun don’t shine. A posh cabin would be ideal.
-##-
SnooDonuts6494@reddit
It is not true.
https://www.irishtimes.com/culture/think-you-know-the-origin-of-posh-you-re-wrong-again-1.4513703
AlunWH@reddit
“Oooh, these biscuits are a bit posh.” Good thing.
“You sound posh.” Bad thing.
Context is everything.
glasgowgeg@reddit
Biscuits aren't people, OP asked about people
AlunWH@reddit
How dare you insult biscuits in such a cavalier fashion!
I take your point, I was just trying to give an example of how context matters.
glasgowgeg@reddit
OP is specifically asking about people though, so if you can't give an example where it's complimentary in the context of a person, that would suggest it can't be used complimentary to a person.
LionLucy@reddit
>”you sound posh.” Bad thing.
Really? Some people sound posh, it’s fine!
doepfersdungeon@reddit
I think they mean it's being used negatively as opposed to it's fundamentally bad to be posh.
AlunWH@reddit
I’ve never heard it said positively, sadly. And it’s usually being directed at me. It’s not always bad, I agree, sometimes it’s simply neutral.
Beverlydriveghosts@reddit
Worth noting that actual posh people won’t be using the word posh. That’s their normal and expected experience
MarkCairns67@reddit
Generally speaking, I've not come across it being used a genuine compliment.
I did have an Indian colleague who was chuffed to bits when someone called him posh for his frequently-expressed aspiration to buy a house in Sutton 😂
SFButts@reddit
Go to m&s and get some posh cheese
glasgowgeg@reddit
That's an item, not a person
BlueFungus458@reddit
Especially if he came from Hounslow, Richmond is definitely posher!
TeamOfPups@reddit
"I got you a bottle of champagne for your wedding anniversary" - "ooh very posh" = compliment
"I'm going to pick up Tarquin from his Fencing class" - "ooh very posh" = insult
Yeah you just have to judge which it is by the tone
glasgowgeg@reddit
OP is asking about referring to someone though, not something.
I can't think of any context when calling a person posh would be complimentary.
SaveMeWakeMeUp@reddit (OP)
Context is king so thank you!
SnooDonuts6494@reddit
It's almost always an insult.
Erivandi@reddit
Generally an insult to a person but a compliment to an object.
A posh person is probably a stuck-up snob who thinks they're better than everyone else.
A posh restaurant is probably a high-class establishment that serves good quality food, but is also very expensive.
Active_Definition_57@reddit
It does depend a lot of context:
"You look posh" could mean either:
You look very smart in that well-cut suit, silk tie and highly polished shoes; or
You look more presentable than you do in your usual attire of worn-out, grubby-looking clothes and scuffed worker's boots.
Chopsticks_Charlie@reddit
Normally followed by either 'cunt' or 'twat' 90's of the time.
SaveMeWakeMeUp@reddit (OP)
As an American, I've noticed those 2 words make their way into british convos frequently haha
StockKick4984@reddit
And if you're really mad you'd follow it up with absolute fucking bellend, just to really emphasise it.
Quiet_surprise79@reddit
If you're not that mad, bloody bellend.
RBisoldandtired@reddit
Wait till you see two Scottish pals speaking to each other lol
Evening-Web-3038@reddit
Just curious but are you an American? Can't quite tell from your OP and this reply.
AskUK-ModTeam@reddit
Don't be a dick to each other, or other subreddits, places, or people.
Don't be a dick to each other, or other subreddits, places, or people. AskUK contains a variety of ages, experiences, and backgrounds - consider not everyone is operating on the same level or background as you. Listen to others before you respond, and be courteous when doing so.
sparkline1234567@reddit
It's the 10% that matter, darling!
Ochib@reddit
And preceded by the words “what a fucking .. “
PhysicsForeign1634@reddit
'POSH' was originally short for 'Port Out, Starboard Home', meaning someone rich enough to book the better coastward views on cruise ships sailing the long way out to India and back. Do it the other way wrong and your view was just sea and nothing else.
So it's normally an insult when said about a person, in a 'more money than sense' way, but can be another way of describing a thing as expensive or upmarket.
Darkgreenbirdofprey@reddit
If they themselves are posh it's a compliment.
Sad-Grade6972@reddit
I guess America doesn't have the class system in the British sense, but rather just being advantaged or disadvantaged. I should imagine there's some sniffiness around old and new money though, if that makes sense! I think in Britain, poshness can be derogatory, not so much out of jealousy, but because people get wound up when they feel other's are being showy, and rubbing their noses in their prosperity. Where people make an observation about something or someone being posh in good nature, many would consider that a bit low class and beneath them to point it out. I'm definitely not posh, but would feel pointing out that someone is, is showing myself up!
Holli303@reddit
"That drink/food/outfit looks posh" could mean anything.
"You posh..." will usually end with something along the lines of "cunt". Cunt can be used as a term of endearment here though. It's all about context.
mellonians@reddit
It's another case of "it's not the word, it's the context in which the word is said". It's the same for compliments and outright insults.
ServerLost@reddit
Deffo insult. It's not that i dislike privileged people i just resent their carefree existence and the arrogance its given a lot of them.
Winston_Carbuncle@reddit
If someone refers to you as a mental posho it's not a complicated
BlainethePayne@reddit
"not complicated"
Winston_Carbuncle@reddit
Lol I give up with autocorrect
BlainethePayne@reddit
Mine came from a swiping keyboard, so we're even lol
Tired_2295@reddit
Insult
Racing_Fox@reddit
I’d take it as a compliment because it’s the polar opposite of being called a chav or common and I’d take offence at those
PretendingIts1995@reddit
Definitely contextual, and as most have said, generally if it's a thing=positive, person=negative.
British are very anti-aristocratic (ironic for a country with a monarch and a house of Lords - we love a bit of irony!) Nobody likes to be seen as having gotten "above their station", and even definitively middle class people will still describe themselves as working class (middle class means something very different to Brits compared to the American usage, which generally just means "average").
Being a fan of stand up comedy, I highly recommend Ed Byrne: Different Class which was a brilliant show he did discussing class in the UK, and touchs on the nuances of insulting people for being "posh".
YoIronFistBro@reddit
It is an observation.
ultraboomkin@reddit
I’ve had 2 dates with a guy and on both occasions he’s called me posh, but it’s endearing. Last night he looked through my wallet at my driving licence and told me my surname was that of a posh twat. “Good thing I like posh twats”.
bowen7477@reddit
Like anything else, it depends on the person who it's aimed at. What you may deem an insult I might laugh at, and vice versa.
kripantina@reddit
and what's wrong with being posh twat? asking for a friend...
BLightyear67@reddit
Ooh. Get Shazza buying cooking her tea from scratch. She is soooooo posh.
Throwaway91847817@reddit
Depends on context and tone of voice
ZBD1949@reddit
Both, depends on the context and tone
BlueFungus458@reddit
Daniella Westbrook dressed head to toe in Burberry. Thinks she’s dressed posh but in fact this look is pure chav.
sbaldrick33@reddit
Depends whether or not it's followed by the word "twat."
SaveMeWakeMeUp@reddit (OP)
This appears to be the theme haha
ARobertNotABob@reddit
Entirely circumstances dependant, it can literally be both.
doepfersdungeon@reddit
It's the opposite something being a little "Live, Laugh, Love". Which is also an insult.
BlueFungus458@reddit
It depends on the context and the tone in which you use it.
Lovely cream tea, served out of matching china with still-warm homemade scones…how posh and lovely.
Stuck-up colleague who looks down on everyone and moans about anything common “don’t invite Arabella to the pub after work, I can’t stand that snobby posh cow going on about her horsey friends”
StockKick4984@reddit
If it's toward a person it's 100% an insult every single time.
Towards a place it could be either. "I'm not going there it's reyt posh" or "you should go to the hotel we went to when you go away, it's reyt posh".
Reyt means right, but in this context is used as really. Yorkshire thing me auld cock.
anarchtea@reddit
Definitely contextual, as others have mentioned. I'd also say it depends on where it's being said, geographically.
I grew up in south Essex but never had the accent, mine closer to RP than anything. So at school, college, work, I was told I sounded, or was, posh. It was never in a good way.
I think that's an isolated example, but it's not the only place.
MrMonkeyman79@reddit
You've answered your own question right there.
Fantastic-Pear6241@reddit
I will not take to being called posh very well.
My American mother in law once called my northern accent posh and I had to just grin and smile through it.
SaveMeWakeMeUp@reddit (OP)
You're a kind soul to grin through any in-law exhange haha
Fantastic-Pear6241@reddit
She's lovely and only ever means well.
HeartyBeast@reddit
Not really. Though it could be used as either, depending on context
Annual-Cookie1866@reddit
It’s a description
AdmRL_@reddit
Pretty much universely an insult.
Posh is a bit of an odd status in the UK. It's not something like working class or upper class, which have metrics you can tack to them to sort of work things out. It's more of a state of mind - it's not what you think about yourself but what your behaviour and actions make the person calling you posh think about you and a lil about the relative class difference between you, and it's highly contextual.
Like a working class bloke could be posh to his working class mates because he reads the Guardian and not the Sun. An oxford educated london trader might think his trader mate is posh because he drives a Benz and not a BMW. A lord's son may think his cousin is posh because he's 20th in line for the throne and not 43rd.
But then it cuts more broadly as well - Scots think the English are posh, Highlands think lowlands are posh, the North of England thinks the entire South is posh, working class think middle & upper are all posh, middle thinks upper are posh and upper thinks royalty is posh.
The only real time it doesn't work out as being an insult is when describing a specific place and not people. But even then it's more as a warning type thing - "We went to this really posh restaurant, the fillet mingon was delicious" is basically saying "This food was amazing, but the place is well to do so if you go, wear a suit and don't swear."
SaveMeWakeMeUp@reddit (OP)
The way you broke down regions was super helpful and something I wanted to include in my original question, so thank you!
Several_Show937@reddit
If something is posh: good thing If someone is posh: bad thing
Relevant_Swimming511@reddit
"Ohh this place is posh" Compliment
"He is a posh prick" Insult
chincheckmcgee@reddit
It’s almost always some kind of insult
Fluffy-Inside-4191@reddit
It's an insult. Posh people are only posh because they choose to act and talk posh. It's an affectation.
ProudArticle8837@reddit
I disagree, I think a lot of it is down to perception and cliches. A lot of people connect it automatically to how someone talks; and that for the most part is out of someone’s control (largely due to upbringing and what they learned from their environment).
People can also choose to change their speech in their adulthood too, but the idea that behaviour that is conditioned by only someone’s personal choice isn’t entirely true.
BeatificBanana@reddit
Totally incorrect. I always got told growing up that I spoke with a "posh accent" compared to other people at my school. I came from the poorest working class family you can imagine, we barely scraped by and were bona-fide country bumpkins. I have absolutely no idea why my accent was seen as posh but I DEFINITELY did not do it on purpose and was very self conscious of it.
minisooms@reddit
That's not correct
never_insightful@reddit
Yeah I'm a bit posh and generally disliked it for a bunch of reasons. If anything I have naturally migrated away from the accent I was brought up with for that reason. I certainly don't dress in a posh way either.
Still from time to time people accuse me of being posh - especially up north where I think a southern accent is often associated with it. Don't get me wrong most of the time it is said in a jokey way but there's no way I can choose to not come across that way without completely appropriating an accent I have no business having.
LionLucy@reddit
I couldn’t really sound less posh if I tried. It would sound very “mockney” which is worse, or else like those RAF pilots from the Armstrong and Miller sketches (hilarious but not what I’m going for)
DameKumquat@reddit
It's not necessarily an insult, but it's always 'othering' - no-one calls themselves posh except in jest.
Sufficient_Return653@reddit
So if someone common (like me n my mates) get anything remotely outside the common norm we will say oooh that’s posh - compliment
If a genuine posh person acts all snobby and stuck up their own arse then yeah we say they are a posh cunt - insult
British culture at its finest haha.
Educational-Angle717@reddit
Insult every time.
ProudArticle8837@reddit
Honestly context is key. I think the UK is unfortunately still recoiling from generations of classism, so at one point that could automatically be considered as a compliment if it’s connected to perceived wealth, opulence, etc.
That being said, if someone is considered “posh”, then it being verbalised these days is usually an insult or an underhanded compliment (if someone’s perception of a person is different to how they “act”). It’s honestly as simple and as complex as the person using it wants it to be.
TrifectaOfSquish@reddit
It can be both depending on context
Revolutionary_West56@reddit
It’s an insult.
BarryMichaelmore@reddit
If the person it’s directed to is posh then it’s an insult, if they’re not posh then it can be a compliment.
LionLucy@reddit
Yes if you actually think someone’s posh there’s no need to tell them. They know, and they’re a bit embarrassed about it but probably wouldn’t change if they could.
Fun_Gas_7777@reddit
To describe a person posh is usually a bad thing. To describe anything else posh can be good or bad depending on the context and who is speaking
pixelunicorns@reddit
It's always been an insult as far as I've heard it being used.
LionLucy@reddit
You could write an essay on this and not come close to covering the nuances! It’s obviously heavily bound up with the British class system and all that entails. Generally it can be an insult (often sarcastic), a neutral statement of fact (often with a wry implied acknowledgment that this shouldn’t really be a term that exists “she’s posher than him, I suppose”), or a compliment (hard to pull of to someone’s face so more often about objects or places “we stayed in a lovely posh hotel”).
ShineAtom@reddit
Thanks to my RP/BBC accent, my colleagues used to laugh at my "posh swearing" when I was reading the news online at dinnertime. They tell me they miss it. As they and I have always got on really well and I still go out with them now I'm retired (and have been for ten years) I have no doubt it was/is meant with affection.
mackerel_slapper@reddit
Person - generally not a compliment (at best “he’s a bit posh”, more often “posh twat); thing - generally complimentary (“it was a really posh hotel”, “we went for a meal in a proper posh restaurant.”)
SaveMeWakeMeUp@reddit (OP)
Context is helpful! Thank you!
erinoco@reddit
It is very rarely a compliment if spoken directly to the person. The only context I can think of that it would be a compliment would be someone with a modest lifestyle using it towards someone they thought had a similar mode of life, but who does something that defies their expectations. And, even there, there is often a subtle dig involved.
You may get people who might well positively describe others as being "posh", but they wouldn't say that directly to the people in question. They would just compliment their tastes.
Ready-Fox-3264@reddit
It’s neither really. If it’s used to describe things it could have a positive meaning in the sense of being elegant or fashionable. For example, a posh house, a posh part of town, a posh way of dressing, and so on.
But inverse snobbery is very, very strong in the UK, so if posh is used to describe a person, it’s almost never a compliment. It’s used to mock or single people out as unjustly privileged compared to the rest.
And truly posh people would also try to understate their ‘poshness’, usually by pretending to be less well off than they are or by emphasising some distant working class relations they have. It’s all theatrics and it’s painful to watch, but you’ll get used to it with time.
Milost_od_Anglija@reddit
A compliment
Elegant_Cancel_6937@reddit
If it's used for things or services it's a compliment but if it's used for people it's most often an insult.
Sea-Still5427@reddit
The word itself might not be but the tone of voice or body language should tell you what's going on.
Dtoid_Ali_D@reddit
Half the time, you'll get called posh if you just stand out in any way.
pjwlondon@reddit
Yes, it can be either negative or positive, depending on context, but fairly mild, neither gushing enthusiasm nor hostile contempt. Whoever's saying it isn't necessarily an authority, after all: to quite a lot of people I'm probably posh in tastes, speech and manner, to others I might be unredeemably lower middle-class or even common as muck. It doesn't really matter that much
EasyCheesecake1@reddit
As with most things it depends on context. Saying something is posh is often meant in a joking (or half joking) manner.. you've poured your beer into a glass, that's a bit posh! Whereas to comment that someone's swimming pool is a posh is more of a genuine 'they must have a lot of money' comment.. how it's said will determine if it's a compliment or a negative comment.
Professional-Test239@reddit
It's not a compliment. And it's not an insult. It's just a statement of fact if someone is posh.
Distinct_Sir_9086@reddit
I get told a lot I sound posh as a born and bred Londoner. While a lot of people try to use it as an insult, I rather take it as a compliment haha
Fine-State8014@reddit
It's rarely in a good way.
Ooooh very posh.
Posh twat.
GlitchingGecko@reddit
I'd never say it as either. More of a friendly mocking.
Tim-Sanchez@reddit
Correct
DamoclesBDA@reddit
Depends on context and tone.
Language is very much dependant on context and tone.
This is true everywhere.
Lynvor@reddit
You've kind of answered your own question, it depends on the context.
AutoModerator@reddit
Please help keep AskUK welcoming!
When replying to submission/post please make genuine efforts to answer the question given. Please no jokes, judgements, etc. If a post is marked 'Serious Answers Only' you may receive a ban for violating this rule.
Don't be a dick to each other. If getting heated, just block and move on.
This is a strictly no-politics subreddit!
Please help us by reporting comments that break these rules.
I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.
AutoModerator@reddit
As the leading UK "ask" subreddit, we welcome questions from all users and countries; sometimes people who ask questions might not appreciate or understand the nuance of British life or culture, and as a result some questions can come across in a different way than intended.
We understand that when faced with these questions, our users may take the opportunity to demonstrate their wit, dry humour, and sarcasm - unfortunately, this also tends to go over the heads of misunderstood question-askers and can make our subreddit seem hostile to users from other countries who are often just curious about our land.
Please can you help prevent our subreddit from becoming an Anti-American echo chamber? If you disagree with any points raised by OP, or OP discusses common tropes or myths about the UK, please refrain from any brash, aggressive, or sarcastic responses and do your best to engage OP in a civil discussion, with the aim to educate and expand their understanding.
If you feel this (or any other post) is a troll post, don't feed the troll, just hit report and let the mods deal with it.
I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.