People who have scars, have you ever been given stick for it in public? (People seeing your skin etc.) And if so, how do you tend to respond

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Acrobatic-Rabbit2660@reddit

Not scars but I have psoriasis and always get dirty looks or people asking what’s that? I hate it and don’t leave my house except for medical appointments.

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My mum used to have horrendous psoriasis and would often get asked if it was contagious. She hated people looking, but didnt mind answering a genuine question. Fifteen years ago she started taking Methotrexate, within eight weeks, 95% of it disappeared. She wishes she could have gone on it thirty years ago, it would have stopped all the stares.

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the-TARDIS-ran-away@reddit

Ok now i KNOW this sounds like mumbo jumbo and will probably be downvoted into oblivion but my partner suffered with that so badly it fucked up his ears. My dad told him to take cleavers tablets (you know, sticky weeds?) The pure ones not filled with crap. I cannot tell you how much it improved. It basically went after a few weeks.

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Own-Heat2669@reddit

I've seen something recently on Instagram about sticky willy being good for skin conditions.

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the-TARDIS-ran-away@reddit

Thats exactly it in capsule form but ive seen it work with my own eyes

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Own-Heat2669@reddit

Awesome, sounds brilliant! I hope your partner is doing ok and kudos to your dad for offering the advice! I was thinking about squishing some up and rubbing it on, but capsules sound a bit less messy. Thanks!

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the-TARDIS-ran-away@reddit

Hope it helps!

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b3ta_blocker@reddit

Have you tried enstilar

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Acrobatic-Rabbit2660@reddit

I’ve tried many different treatments. The only one that worked was a biological one which suppressed my immune system and I had to come off it cause I nearly died getting a chest infection.

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b3ta_blocker@reddit

I am very sorry to hear that.

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Dissidant@reddit

I was going to say psoriasis 😀 Its well managed now but wasn't always the case. The trick is when you are on a busy bus/train and someone is staring, you tell them after tomorrow you aren't contagious and usually you'll get a seat pronto

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Acrobatic-Rabbit2660@reddit

🤣🤣 that’s hilarious. I’m glad yours is well managed.

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feckarse-drinkgirls@reddit

I got coprolallic tourettes Can relate with that

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jordsta95@reddit

The arms full of scars from years of self harm? I had one question, many years ago, by my then 6 year old cousin who had never seen me without long sleeves on. (Told him it was from fighting a tiger - and he seemed happy with that answer) The legs, belly, and chest of scars which came from a similar "outlet"? Not a single question. The small scar on my kneecap, and a decently sized one on my lower back/hip area? Those ones get a lot more questions. The kneecap one is odd, it's just quite a big scar for the area I guess. The other, I guess it kinda looks like someone illegally stole my kidney or something (both came from the same accident - being hit by a car). But what I found with the self harm scars was when the cuts were fresh, there'd be people who would make comments/ask questions (unless they were bandaged surprisingly enough). Just the scars? Nope, never had a question about them. It's been like 7 years since the last cut, and longer since the last time people would have seen any - so I would hope attitudes have changed, and comments would generally be a bit less awful nowadays.

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Chuckle_Berry_Spin@reddit

I have an odd scar on my arm that people ask about, usually with no harm meant. I used to be a family case manager. Once when completing a home visit, the family dog attacked me. It was cold and I was wearing layers, so thankfully the injury was mostly superficial. But since the damage was mostly under the skin, it has left what looks almost like a bruise, in a semi-circle. Now that I am a behaviorist with intellectually disabled people, I am regularly asked which of the kids/clients bit me, since it looks like a recent bruise. They're only asking since it looks fresh, I think. I suppose is it looked like a black eye, it'd be weird if no one asked about it! I laugh it off, telling them someday I'll get two dots tattooed above it so it looks like a smiley face. :)

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TokyoMegatronics@reddit

No, I have a lot of scars on my arms. I forget they are there now, it’s probably been a decade since I SH. I’ll go out in public in t shirts or just act like they don’t exist because until someone mentions them, which no one ever does. Or, I catch someone looking at them, I genuinely forget they are even there. It’s been a long time since I’ve seen anyone looking at them, maybe people do and I just don’t notice as they are pretty prominent, but I do get a little self conscious then? But I often forget about it after

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PARFT@reddit

had my cheek split and 30 stitches - 35 years ago. nobody has ever said anything apart from in the immediate aftermath.

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b1ggu5dicku5@reddit

29M, former cancer patient here. I have more than 1.5 metres of scars on my upper body including a 45cm sternum to pubic bone and three thoracotomy scars. No one has ever laughed or even said anything. I thought some people would ask but they really don't. I have no problem getting into the pool or at the beach. Sure, some people probably look but whatever, my body isn't normal. Cancer is much easier to explain about than mental health though.

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Professional_Goal311@reddit

I have keloid scars and people are always asking what it is and saying try this try that to get rid of them. It’s genetic unfortunately if I try to remove it there’s no guarantee more will not pop up. It’s on my shoulder so I always avoid sleeveless tops and dresses though I’ve always want to wear them. Makes it harder in the warm weather.

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Adventurous-Idea1473@reddit

people mostly just stare. someone did ask me on a first date 'why do you cut your arms' i wasnt sure how to answer that...

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takhana@reddit

You haven’t lived until you’ve been drunk in a smoking area of a club and some chap has come up to you, stroked your scars and said “please stop doing that 🥹” Fucking wanted the ground to swallow me up there and then. Mortifying.

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Adventurous-Idea1473@reddit

its so cringe and patronising

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Still-BangingYourMum@reddit

As a BKA I some times don't put my leg on, leaving the scar very visible, in the 9 years since the visit from the leg fairy, only on one occasion have I ever had someone tell me my stump scar was disgusting and should be covered up because it was making her sick, looking at it. Totally ignored her, and then an old lady behind me, said to her, that if its making you sick looking at it, don't look at it. Which was greeted with several nods of the head from others in the checkout line.

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Maleficent_Day_3869@reddit

i have self harm scars on my arm and thighs. they’re years old but still very prominent. i never really faced much backlash from anyone in the public with it. one woman asked if i was okay and i get stares and some sympathetic smiles i used to wear t shirts at work and while management were cool with it and never spoke about it, my coworkers were HORRIBLE. they absolutely did treat me differently and used to spread rumours about me, saying i was insane and that i did all sorts of awful things like harming animals, that i was a druggie and i was gay ?? i am a lesbian but i never told them that… they were so nice to me until i started having my scars out which is how i know that was the cause that made me super insecure so i switched jobs and now wear long sleeves even in 30 degree heat. never again will i show my scars at work. i still don’t care in public if i’m alone but i hide them if i’m with people and around my family. i’ve spent £2000 on laser which didn’t work and am currently going through the medical tattooing/scar camouflage route to get them removed it sucks because i am doing so much better mentally and was ready to just accept them for what they are but my job made me regress back into myself and it made me so depressed. i never want to feel so alienated again

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InkedDoll1@reddit

I have big keloid surgery scars on my left thigh, so it's only in summer that people see them. I have had them stared at, but i don't think anyone has ever actually commented. One of them is from having my leg lengthened, and when I had the brace in people used to comment on that ALL the time. To the point I started making up stories about why I had it.

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Viking-Bastard-XIV@reddit

I have a 7inch scar running down my left cheek, it’s from an operation to remove part of my cheekbone. I have, for the last 12 years a beard because I was fed up of people pointing it out. I even had one man in a shop ask “what’s that thing on your face for?”

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atomic_mermaid@reddit

Sorry you went through that :( I stg some people's heads are just a place to store their hats. Not a single bit of brain in there.

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atomic_mermaid@reddit

Not SH but an accident left a 2" scar on my face. The comments people have thought acceptable to make are WILD. I think some people were raised by slugs. I hope you're doing ok OP.

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standupstrawberry@reddit

I have terrible slash scars on my legs from being attacked but they look like really deep SH scars. I think one time in a group therapy thing I went to someone brought it up but because they'd seen someone with similar scars from a motorcycle accident (it's what they said but maybe they were offering and out incase they'd over stepped in asking?). Usually people leave it alone and if they notice (maybe they don't?) I assume they just decide it's not appropriate to ask. I have psoriasis as well and have had times when it's very noticeable and people don't seem to be able to not mention it (and sometimes are quite rude about it) which is pretty annoying tbh.

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Sybriarla@reddit

Not a self harm scar but I have a decent sized raised scar on the left side of my neck, it used to wind me up when people would ask about it or stare, the amount of dumb jokes about it grated on my nerves so much. It was from an operation when I was 13 and the surgeon didn't care for making it "look good", like the one before had done, this guy just just stitched it up. Now, I don't care so much and if people do ask Ill make up some wild story before telling the truth, just to see how long they'll believe me. I was brought up not to stare or ask personal questions of strangers so I think that's why it got on my nerves so much, you never know why or what reason someone has for any scar. Hope you're doing okay there friend.

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lovedvirtually@reddit

Never beyond a few looks but someone (in the smoking area outside Disney world of all places) came up to me on holiday to say they were glad I was still here and they had noticed my sh scars. Nice sentiment but quite a bizarre experience

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Ulfgeirr88@reddit

The insides of my arms are absolutely covered in self harm scars, it's a three figure number the amount of them. I've had the long glances that I just filter out now but in the past I had one person, a complete stranger get very aggressive about it on the bus, she very loudly pointed the scarring out then accused me of doing it for attention, I was just wearing shirt for the first time in years because it was very hot that day

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Own-Heat2669@reddit

Yes, I have a huge scar on my neck from wide excision surgery following a melanoma* when I was younger. I had to have a skin graft and follow up surgeries. There was no treatment other than surgery at the time. For several years I hid it under collars, scarves etc. I have had people pointing at it, discussing it behind me in queues and some absolute horrors have taken photos of it. People are the worst. Seriously, just leave people alone. That moment of entertainment for them has been severely damaging for me. I am a very anxious person for other reasons, so for me to retaliate in any way has not been possible. Just have to suck it up. I don't really go out much in part because of it. *Not through carelessness on my part.

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TheHootOwlofDeath@reddit

I have a prominent scar on my face from a childhood accident. It is rare anyone says anything about it though, even though I don't cover it with make up. Usually, they just ask what happened, probably because it's so obviously the result of an injury, there is no ambiguity about what it is.

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ShelleysSkylark@reddit

I personally haven't had anyone really mention them except from one girl who bullied me in school, she used to mention them at lunch time and roll her eyes while saying things like "oh did the cat get you again". Sometimes it genuinely was the cat! Still boils my blood

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VOODOO285@reddit

I worked with a chap who had a mad scar on the top of his head. Once we got comfortable with each other I just flat out asked him how he got it and said I bet it’s an interesting story. I don’t recall what it was now but he loved telling the tale. If someone’s got cut marks on their arms or some such where it’s obviously self inflicted. I will not ask for obvious reasons. I have a decent scar on my neck from an operation and if anyone wonders I’m happy to tell them. Doesn’t bother me in the slightest. I’d have to be pretty much naked for anyone to see the rest of my scars so not really an issue.

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QuickWalk4862@reddit

I have burst capillaries on my cheek, a circle about the size of a 2 pence piece and if I don’t wear makeup or if makeup is fading I get accused of having a love bite, or ppl ask if I have been hit, or just the what’s wrong with your cheek? I’ve had sessions of IPL but nothing seems to work to get rid of it 🤷🏼‍♀️

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Chicklecat13@reddit

I’ve got a lot of health issues and I use a chair for long distances or when I’m tired. So like say I’ll be at a festival using my chair but every now and then I’ll get up and dance to my favourite songs and then sit back down. So that draws enough criticism. Anyway I like to wear backless tops and often people behind me will make their snide comments until I sit down and I’ll move my hair (it’s down to my bum) and reveal the big ass scar where I had metal rods put in. Every time theyll spot it and I know they have because I usually hear some form of “oh shit look at that on her back”. Weirdly I don’t get comments after that. I have others but most people will just ask if they bother me and tbh they don’t, not much anyway. I’m always more than happy to explain. My self harm ones have healed fully and can’t be seen unless I’m very dehydrated or underweight so those I don’t have to really worry about.

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e-pancake@reddit

I have a bunch of self harm scars, some very visible but most kind of subtle unless you’re near me. I’ve never had a stranger say anything to me, I’ve caught a couple glances but no actual conversation. I have had a some people, usually a health professional, ask me about it and I’m very honest and open. it’s been two and a half years since I last did it!

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yalliepants@reddit

It took me almost 15 years to be brave enough to show my self harm scars that are on my arms. The ones on my legs aren't visible with the clothes I wear (thankfully). I understand why people don't want to show them. For me, it was showing strangers that I'm vulnerable and showing others I'm vulnerable was a huge no-no for me for a long time. Unfortunately I have had all kinds of people "noticing" over the years. People pointing, staring, laughing. Some sweet older lady asked me if I was okay once. Others have asked what they are and why I have them...sometimes this has been out of malice or to take the piss, sometimes it has been genuine curiosity. Most of the time I can tell which it is and respond accordingly. I don't tell people to fuck off and mind their own business anymore, just roll my eyes and move on. I won't lie, it's hard when people notice them and react to them, but I am trying to use that emotion into walking taller with my head up. It isn't showing people I am vulnerable, it is me proving to myself that it doesn't matter what people think. The scars are on my body for a reason, I wouldn't have the same life without them. They're part of who I am and a reminder that I've come a very long way.

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Legit_Vampire@reddit

I have a birthmark on my stomach and leg from a very early age I got asked what had happened so not sou h 'stick' just questions

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doesntmatteryaknow@reddit

All the time, but in fairness. It is funny.

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Smart_Roof_8966@reddit

No one gave a shit I assaulted you get stick “all the time” for your scars. Right.

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doesntmatteryaknow@reddit

No, i trapped my finger in a gate and it exploded. Now it looks like the tip of a penis.

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jimmybiggles@reddit

that is a brilliantly positive way of looking at things 🤣🤣 thanks for the laugh

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doesntmatteryaknow@reddit

Glad it brightened your day, proves my point though right? It is funny 🤣

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jimmybiggles@reddit

yes, bloody brilliant! i've got one down from my ear to my chin, people always ask me what it is - i always come up with a different story each time. i think my last one was i got caught in a machine in the milk bottle factory. my most frequent one is shark attack, always gets some shocked looks 🤣

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doesntmatteryaknow@reddit

Just a shit sword swallower fella. You don't practice with the sharp blades. Fuck sake 🤣🤣

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feckarse-drinkgirls@reddit

Im sorry but https://preview.redd.it/jm2racmg9q3h1.jpeg?width=324&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=f7360f1ca496dfee68f5b211a2287303ff0c81f7

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doesntmatteryaknow@reddit

Penis-fingertip.

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BreadfruitOk5332@reddit

Nah I have cut scars all over my arms and legs and although I hate them and will never lose them completely nobody has ever mentioned them. Had a few long glances though. You doing ok?

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lifeofpiranhas@reddit (OP)

I'm mid tbh. Not bad but not great either. Warm weather feels trickier to navigate

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BreadfruitOk5332@reddit

Yeah I get that. Want to talk about it?

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berry-worm@reddit

I have them all over my arms, legs and stomach and nobody really asks or mentions it. Some of them are tattooed over. I do however also have a huge birthmark scar on my neck and people have quite frequently asked what that one is lol. If I see another person out in public with obviously self-harm scars I tend to feel a bit overwhelmed with some kind of empathy or other positive emotion, kind of like I'm glad they're also still here, but I wouldn't say anything about it to a stranger.

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MoodyStocking@reddit

I self-harmed from 13 to 24 ish? There was no particularly severe scars on display but I had the odd comment from people once I plucked up the courage to wear short sleeves when I was around 18. It was always awkward, I used to just laugh it off and not really answer. I’m more than a decade older now and literally no one’s mentioned them in like 10 years. When I think back to the people that commented on them the only thing I can think about is how diabolically socially inept they were, I’m genuinely embarrassed for them. It’s a terrible reflection on their character, no one has scars for a happy reason.

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thecrazycrosser@reddit

I have many self harm scars on my arms. Only been asked “what happened?” Once when I was on holiday in Tanzania (can’t imagine it’s often seen in rural areas!). In the UK I’ve been asked how I got better, what helped me which was a nice conversation to have. I’m very open if people were to approach with curiosity or for advice.

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WingingItSince87@reddit

I have a circumcision scar, was given sticker fur it in public once…then got arrested for indecent exposure!

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Mental_Body_5496@reddit

I see lots of young people with old self harm scars and I think they ate very brave to be in recovery and wear clothing that doesnt hide them.

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