If you move into a residential area, are you expected to introduce yourself to the neighbors?
Posted by mdelgado73@reddit | AskAnAmerican | View on Reddit | 73 comments
In some movies or series it acts like it is this way, but in others are current residents who make the first move. Or is this a fiction thing and it doesn't have to happen IRL?
Duque_de_Osuna@reddit
It’s not that way at all in the mid Atlantic states. People are cold here.
PlanMagnet38@reddit
Maybe in PA. In Maryland, I have introduced myself or been introduced to all of my immediate neighbors in every neighborhood I’ve lived in here (probably around 8 neighborhoods in the past 30 years).
GhostOfJamesStrang@reddit
It's entirely individual preference.
More often it is the neighbors who will welcome you to the neighborhood, rather than you reaching out to them.
PlanMagnet38@reddit
Same. I have a default sort of welcome bag (hand soap, candle, toilet paper, and paper towels) that I drop off with a brief note (our address, names, and contact info). Some people message me after to introduce themselves and some don’t. But I think it’s important to at least start off with a welcoming attitude.
bbspiders@reddit
Yes this is my experience. We are a pretty friendly block so as soon as a new neighbor shows up people are out there with the moving truck saying hi and usually offering to put you on the neighbor group chat.
ZootOfCastleAnthrax@reddit
Same.
NaturGirl@reddit
We introduce ourselves to the immediate neighbors. The ones right across the street and on each side. Nobody beyond that.
rustyfinna@reddit
This is one of those questions that make you realize most of reddit is antisocial losers
The_Lawn_Ninja@reddit
It was absolutely expected back in the 90s when I was a kid.
If you didn't introduce yourself within the first few days of moving in, the neighbors would just come to your door, usually a bunch of them at once. Not wanting to interact with your neighbors was seen as bizarrely anti-social.
Today, we barely interact with our neighbors, even the ones who've been here as long as us who we used to socialize with every day. We still talk online and through text messages, sure. I know all about their kids' recitals and what restaurants they like lately and who's mad about dog owners not cleaning up poop, but even just saying hello in person feels strange now.
Bluemonogi@reddit
You do not have to introduce yourself to neighbors or ever speak tothem if you don’t want to.
iRL, I have never had new neighbors come and introduce themselves nor have I done it.
Logical-Cap461@reddit
I always move my junk and then have a garage sale. Best way to meet the new neighbors.
RonP713@reddit
It was kind of mixed when I moved into the suburbs for the first time two years ago. Some came and said hi, and some just said hi when they happened to see me outside. Now there’s a group of neighbors that always hang out and drink on Friday nights. We have a group text to keep in touch during the day or in case anything weird is going on in the neighborhood. It’s pretty cool and helpful to be close to your neighbors.
Wak3upHicks@reddit
I've lived here 6 years, have yet to speak to the neighbors
sarcasticorange@reddit
That's so sad.
Wak3upHicks@reddit
Eh, they haven't tried either. We get along well enough with what we've got that nobody causes disturbances for the others
MajesticBread9147@reddit
I think every year I have new neighbors lol
The12th_secret_spice@reddit
I think it’s a fading pleasantry. I introd myself to my immediate neighbors and waive/say hi to neighbors when I’m sitting on the porch.
levi070305@reddit
If we end up close enough to each other to be able to do so with normal voices... they I think you should. Hi i'm so and so, just moved in back in whatever. Otherwise I will just wave if I see one. I think thats appropriate. Its acknowledging them in a friendly way.
buckylug@reddit
some neighborhoods will think of the new family as rude if they dont introduce themselves, some will find it overbearing and unnecessary if they do introduce themselves, but bringing muffins etc to the new neighbors is a pleasantry that is definitely going by the wayside.
AdelleDeWitt@reddit
Whenever we get new neighbors we bring them eggs from our chickens and baked goods and the last couple times we had new neighbors they also came by the neighborhood and dropped off food and introduced themselves.
1235813213455_1@reddit
It would be super weird not to. Can't imagine not even knowing my neighbors name, that's just sad.
BikingThroughCanada@reddit
Here on the West Coast of the US, I'd say generally not, but I don't think it would be seen as out of the ordinary if someone were to do so.
Sufficient_Cow_7132@reddit
Depends
Scrappy_The_Crow@reddit
Expected? No. Is it nice to do so? Yes.
Just understand that if you move somewhere and are standoffish from the start, you might not get assistance you could use later. I don't mean they wouldn't call emergency services, I mean they wouldn't lend you tools or watch your pets when you're away.
butchpoptart@reddit
It largely depends on the part of the country and the type of neighborhood. In the south or midwest, it is probably more common than in the north. I find it easiest to if it happens organically - like when people are already outside, instead of going to the door. Once you have met a few neighbors, if you want to know then better, host a cookout for this purpose and invite a few neighbors you have not yet met.
I live in a rapidly growing area and this is a very effective way to establish a community. This is also a very effective way to identify the neighbors who aren't very friendly.
Equivalent-Willow179@reddit
Not at all. If people wave or say hello you should definitely be friendly back. If you and your neighbor go out to get the mail at the same moment and you're three feet apart it might be nice of you to wave and say hello. But you do not have to go door to door introducing yourself if you don't want to.
willtag70@reddit
Generally no. Some people are that outgoing and sociable, but it's not an expectation. Some people make an effort to welcome new neighbors but also not expected or prevalent in my experience.
Impulse2915@reddit
It happens more often if you live in and are surrounded by homes people own and not rent.
When I rent I rarely met my neighbors, but as soon as I bought my house I met every family on my block.
1029394756abc@reddit
I live in a town house with a garage in the back. I don’t use the front door. In 18 years I’ve never talked to one neighbor.
Porcupine-in-a-tree@reddit
It certainly happens in my neighborhood. Highly dependent on the place though.
too_too2@reddit
I moved to a new neighborhood a few years ago (bought a house). We try to be friendly with our neighbors. I know the names of the ones on either side of me and a couple others around but not the majority. I like to garden so that’s been a good way to meet the neighbors, just be outside and say hi once in a while. Our driveway is adjacent to one of their driveways so while it’s not a shared space, we see each other a lot and they’ll bring our garbage bin in for us / vice versa. Our neighbors are also a lot older than us so we try to help out when we see an opportunity (snow shoveling for example)
Thin-Ad-9463@reddit
I did that, learned I’m not fond of them. now I have to say “hi” all the time and decline invites to go over.
Intelligent_Pop1173@reddit
I wouldn’t knock on their door because people are crazy nowadays and might show up with a gun lol but if you see them outside, it’s normal to at least wave. I befriended one apartment neighbor casually and it helped a lot because she was always there and would come over and care for our cat multiple times when we were away.
ShowScene5@reddit
Talk to strangers? Heavens to Betsy, no.
Regular_Courage3208@reddit
It all depends. Cuz I was raised in my mom's childhood home, so I never really introduced myself to the neighbors for obvious reasons. Since I bought my first house, the only neighbors that I introduced myself to was the adult children that live next door. The previous homeowner was an elderly man, and one of his daughters and son-in-law are still my direct next neighbors. I didn't introduce myself to the others. Granted my "development" is just on a street right outside of town that you can tell used to be part of the farmer's field that our houses back up to. So we all kinda mind out business. But I have never had a neighbor come introduce themselves to me even when I was living in apartments lol
Regnum90@reddit
I've been in my house for 3 years now and I've yet to meet any of my neighbors. It's an extremely quiet and peaceful neighborhood that doesn't have much outdoor activity other than a couple kids didn't the street. That's one of the main reasons we bought the house. I would absolutely hate loving in a place that does block parties and community events.
InksOwl@reddit
Absolutely not. Lived here 11 years. Spoken in passing to 3 neighbors and one random lady that walks the neighborhood (she complemented a tree of mine) and that’s it. One of those was just asking about a delay in trash pickup and the other was asking about the neighborhood since they were buying the house.
BigDamBeavers@reddit
Kind of.
Nobody knows their neighbors but it's still perceived as rude or stand-off-ish to not at least drop by with a small gift to let people know who you are and that you don't make hamburger out of neighborhood kids in your basement.
Klutzy-Comment6897@reddit
Only to the fit females. 🤷🏻♂️
ZootOfCastleAnthrax@reddit
Ew.
Prize_Consequence568@reddit
Relax it's just a joke.
Klutzy-Comment6897@reddit
Exactly. Some people are clueless.
Traditional-Let9530@reddit
Not expected, but appreciated. America is basically a spectrum from hey welcome over anytime to please do not perceive me through my blinds. Depends heavily on the neighborhood.
Responsible_Side8131@reddit
No. It’s not expected but some people do it.
peesoutside@reddit
It’s generational. I’m Gen X and am on good terms with my neighbors and it’s been mutually beneficial. My younger neighbors don’t bother but that might change if they have kids. Kids tend to drive relationships in a neighborhood
brian11e3@reddit
I am a Millennial and on good terms with my neighbors. They have all received help, free produce, and/or free eggs from me at some point in time.
ScatterTheReeds@reddit
Usually, the neighbors are the ones who approach you to welcome you to the neighborhood.
TheMrsH1124@reddit
My neighbors introduced themselves to us. But we're in a very friendly neighborhood and have block parties and such
TsundereLoliDragon@reddit
No, but I would probably bullshit with them if I saw them hanging outside.
sneezhousing@reddit
No way
johannisbeeren@reddit
Nope. Most don't even know their neighbors at all, like not even a name.
XupcPrime@reddit
Why would you think that lol
ZootOfCastleAnthrax@reddit
It's a huge country. There's a massive variety in lived and shared experience.
Tiled_Deepslate@reddit
Tbf, our school busses are bright yellow. Greeting your neighbors isn't THAT outlandish in comparison
Prize_Consequence568@reddit
"If you move into a residential area, are you expected to introduce yourself to the neighbors?"
No. It would be nice but no.
"In some movies or series"
SIGH... here we go again...
Five_Slow@reddit
Honestly, it depends on where you are. At my house in the city, I didn't talk to my neighbors for 5 years. Not that any of us were unfriendly or unpleasant, we'd wave to each other but we never went out of our way to introduce ourselves. Now that my extrovert wife lives with me, I know them all by name, but it hasn't really changed how I interact with them.
Now, up at my cabin, I know all the neighbors, talk to them regularly, and have all their phone numbers. That way we can keep a watch on each other's places while we're not there.
Adventurous_Button63@reddit
It used to be more common. Now, it’s going to depend on a lot of factors related to the new people and the neighborhood. My brother lives in a neighborhood that has a lot of young families with kids. Their neighborhood is relatively close knit and my brother is a gregarious socializer. He introduces himself and his family often when people move in. I used to live in a neighborhood that was mostly older people and had a small cohort of families with kids. I’d rather not talk to a lot of people so I casually conversed with the people who lived immediately next to us in passing and that was it. Now I live in a more rural area and we’ve not really spoken to the neighbors at all. Their house is a little far away for anything but waving from a distance.
morganalefaye125@reddit
It used to be when I was a kid in the 80's/early 90's. By the time I was in high school, no one really did it anymore, unless the people that moved in were older folks
Anonymous_Browing@reddit
Kinda depends where. In Pennsylvania when we moved, none of our neighbors introduced themselves to us. But my mom had us give chocolate chip cookies to when some neighbors moved next-door to us. But I think that’s just because she’s from Texas and “people tend to be more friendly in the south.”
Any-Instruction-3373@reddit
The only time I really talk to my neighbors is when the power goes out. Everyone comes outside looking dazed and sleepy and confused and asks each other, “is your power out, too?”
Jcwill@reddit
In the Midwest or the Southern US, we're a very friendly bunch. If you aren't in the bigger cities you should expect to be greeted. It's absolutely great if you put yourself out there and introduce yourself. Knowing your neighbors means they can keep an eye on your property or anything unsafe. You should do the same for them. We know the names and even the phone numbers of our neighbors. When we are gone they noticed things that don't seem right. We do the same for them. They even mowed my lawn for me when I broke my leg.
_WillCAD_@reddit
It's not expected, but it does happen. I think it happens more in rural areas than in urban; I don't know any of the people in my suburban apartment building, and I've been here over thirteen years.
Key-Contest-2879@reddit
I’ve introduced myself to neighbors when I was new, sometimes. And sometimes I’ve introduced myself to new neighbors. And sometimes they’ve introduced themselves to me.
And other times no one introduces anyone to anyone. Different places and different circumstances.
So it’s whatever.
dangleicious13@reddit
No. I've lived in my house for almost 14 years. I don't know the name of anyone in my neighborhood.
StinkieBritches@reddit
I introduced myself and my kids to my next door neighbors when we moved in over 20 years ago. We have nothing in common, but we’re still pretty good neighbors and always look out for each other.
o93mink@reddit
Depends on the residential area
SweetOutrageous1275@reddit
It's smart to meet your neighbors
MiraToombs@reddit
In my neighborhood the current residents are the ones who greet the new ones. I however am like three new residents behind at this point, so I just say “hi” as I walk by.
FlippingPossum@reddit
Expected? No. Will all the neighbors introduce themselves when they see a new person? Yes. 😂
I've been in my house since 2002. Neighbors rarely change in my neighborhood. We get a little excited.
MrLongWalk@reddit
It’s not an obligation but it does happen
wiserTyou@reddit
More commonly they would stop by to say hello. Not always at once, it could be gradual over weeks . It's becoming much less common these days.
Bzman1962@reddit
I was always looking for the Welcome Wagon
Ok-Energy-9785@reddit
No