Resigned from a Sr Staff DS role last week to build full-time. I cant sleep anymore
Posted by Obvious_Gap_5768@reddit | ExperiencedDevs | View on Reddit | 45 comments
I am a Sr. Staff Data Scientist at a large public company. Good comp, good manager, good WLB. I'd been building things on the side for about a year with my wife. Open source dev tool an edtech product, and a hackathon project that got traction.
None of them replacing my salary but all of them taking more of my brain than my day job was. I submitted my resignation last week, currently serving notice.
The fear has got worse after resigning, not before. When it was a side project there was nothing at stake. Now there is. The salary comparison is brutal. I keep opening a spreadsheet that tells me I'm fine on runway and then feeling not fine anyway.
Enterprise interest exists. I've had calls with companies that have 500+ engineers, signed an NDA with one. But enterprise sales as a two-person team is a pipeline management problem I have zero muscle for. A single POC can take 8 weeks before any code runs.
The part I got right was starting while employed. Eight months of overlap where I built the core product nights and weekends. Would not have had the conviction to quit cold.
Would love any suggestions you might have, I am just feeling very anxious
Acrobatic-Ice-5877@reddit
My suggestion, as someone whose been building a SaaS on the side, is that you should have started building after hours and on weekends.
You think it will take 8 weeks but this might not be true. I thought I’d have my software ready in 3 months. I used a Gantt chart and really checked my schedule. I accounted for holidays, sickness, and vacation plus days where I couldn’t get time in due to unforeseen circumstances.
I am 20 months into developing my SaaS right now. I told myself last month that this month I’d be ready. I’d start making phone calls, I’d network, and get everything ready. I began business formation about a month ago, got a business line, and have begun making a business bank account.
I projected that to be done 2 weeks ago. It’s Friday and my account is still not open. In fact I just received an email stating that they need another document.
Why am I telling you all of this? You are going to have disruption after disruption. You are going to have delay after delay. If there’s anything that I’ve learned, my estimates are wrong and shit only gets done when it is crossed off my list.
Best thing you can do is actively keep a list of things you need to do and keep it simple. I don’t use Trello or other apps. I keep a physical notepad and review it daily. At the beginning of the week I write down my goals. At the end of the week I review what I did and plan for the next week. I also use my daily commute to do system design and brainstorm.
I find it particularly useful to listen to books geared towards entrepreneurs too. You need to get yourself in the zone. My favorite one that I have read 2-3 times is the book my Jocko about ownership and accountability. I can’t get enough of it.
One of my favorite chapters is the one where he talks about looking around and making a call. If you don’t know who he was he was in the military and responsible for tactical decisions that could cost people their lives. One of his mindsets was that you had to make a decision and move. Makes sense when you are in a life or death situation.
He thinks this same mindset can be applied in business and I do too. One of the things you need to get used to is checking your surroundings and making a call. Even if it’s a bad call, do it.
You can only learn through action and having this mindset will prevent you from paralysis analysis. I think it’s important as a business owner but also as an engineer. I think it’s especially important as an engineer because this profession attracts bright individuals. It’s a fact.
However, being bright comes with its consequences. It can be hard to make a decision because we are too good at thinking and want to have all of the information present and available before we make a decision.
Sometimes you just have to accept that you will need to endure a little bit of ambiguity and that you’ll figure out your next challenge. I have found this to be incredibly useful as I push myself into areas that are outside of my immediate understanding.
bphase@reddit
Long post you have written but it seems you didn't start by reading the OP.
The OP:
Acrobatic-Ice-5877@reddit
I think this part through me off.
throwaway_0x90@reddit
cool story
avoid_pro@reddit
Why you think it is fake?
LittleLordFuckleroy1@reddit
Sure you’re not dealing with AI psychosis? Quitting before you have a dime of income from your side hustle is wild.
Obvious_Gap_5768@reddit (OP)
I have an edtech product with 25k users that's making money. Nowhere close to my salary but it's not zero. The quit was based on having a product with actual users and enterprise interest on the dev tool side
AdConfident9012@reddit
ed tech is notoriously hard to sell. Is it a enterprise product? You need to be a sales person now. quit developing more starting selling.
AdConfident9012@reddit
bro, if everyone thinks like this no one will ever start a company.
Forsaken-Intern7941@reddit
No risk, no reward.
Try to use all this nervous energy into energy for your product development
Smok3dSalmon@reddit
Little late for advice? You’re committed.
Should have quiet quit until you got fired and got severance.
Obvious_Gap_5768@reddit (OP)
Fair point on the timing. I guess I just wanted to put this out of my head somewhere mainly
But quiet quitting with a manager I actually respected wasn't an option. Would've felt like stealing
EkoChamberKryptonite@reddit
That's because it is. Probably going to get a lot of flack for this but I think it's best to quit than to quiet quit. Now there are exceptions like the case where the org is royally shafting you comp-wise despite you bringing it up then feel free to act your wage.
Smok3dSalmon@reddit
Ask the manager if he’s heard of any layoff conversation and volunteer. I guess it’s good to keep the bridge intact. Would you go back to the job?
endurbro420@reddit
If you actually want to succeed on your own, you are going to have to be a bit more cutthroat imo.
At this point there isn’t going back so stop even looking at the numbers. Give yourself some time to transition and give a realistic date for when things actually need to be up and running (income wise). If it is still not off the ground at that time, then stress about income.
Obvious_Gap_5768@reddit (OP)
Yeah you're right. I'm a good builder but I suck at selling and that's probably the thing that'll kill me if anything does. Need to work on this
The deadline idea is solid though. Picking a date and not stressing till then sounds healthier stressing over numbers all the time
negme@reddit
naive
nobtrader@reddit
as a ex founder, you're gonna learn first hand that selling is way harder than building the product. And of top of that, doing customer service/marketing work will force you to really prioritize whats important. Good luck
Low_Entertainer2372@reddit
sounds like you drank the kool aid and you're now experiencing the consequences of your actions.
try to revert the resignation or just roll with it and see where you end up on.
WelshBluebird1@reddit
So you quit without a plan?
matthkamis@reddit
Were you making any money from the side project when you quit?
Obvious_Gap_5768@reddit (OP)
Yes. I have an edtech product with around 25k users that's generating revenue. Not salary-replacement money but enough to know people will pay for something I build
matthkamis@reddit
Enough to cover your essential costs?
Idea-Aggressive@reddit
Please stop advising people to “silence quit”, because others are punished for it.
Regardless of what you might think, just stop!
Obvious_Gap_5768@reddit (OP)
Agreed. I never quiet quit either. I was delivering more than what was expected till the day I resigned That's partly why it was so draining. Giving 100% at work and then coming home to build on the side isn't sustainable. Something had to give
PoopsCodeAllTheTime@reddit
Did u use ai to write this lol
uniquesnowflake8@reddit
Therapy weekly sessions
Obvious_Gap_5768@reddit (OP)
Not in therapy but my wife is my co-founder so I get unsolicited feedback sessions for free
pbhandari@reddit
I cannot third the therapy recommendation hard enough.
Finding a good one I vibed with wasn't automatic, but once I did find one it was super worth it.
x-jhp-x@reddit
I mean this unironically, but this is a great suggestion. There are tons of crazy therapists, but if you can find a great one, they can help you in life. Psychiatrists also have a medical degree.
nrith@reddit
You have every right to feel anxious. You should have thought of that earlier.
nopuse@reddit
Hi, u/Obvious_Gap_5768. You have an interesting post history for such a young account.
Obvious_Gap_5768@reddit (OP)
Yeah this is my main account. I post about the dev tool I'm building and whatever else is on my mind. Not hiding anything, just don't have a 10 year Reddit history
x-jhp-x@reddit
hmmm. That is true... I checked out one of the projects listed on the profile, and the description was, Crack FAANG interviews with our comprehensive platform ... Join 25k+ engineers with 95% success rate And there seems like there is no way that can possibly be true. Unless I suppose it is disingenuous and something like 95% success rate of passing the program?
x-jhp-x@reddit
What you're feeling seems normal and reasonable. Most 'normal/reasonable' people are not interested in trading a reliable job with benefits, 401k, health insurance, and more to do a startup, especially when most side projects/startups either fail or can't replace real income. The more experience you have, the better positioned you are to launch or own company/product, but also the more $ you're potentially losing out from by not working a steady and reliable job.
I know there's a lot of comments/tropes about CEOs and startup founders, and how many are a bit crazy or psychopathic. I'm not sure how true or untrue it is, or to the extent if it is, but I can see that most 'normal' people don't want the stress, and if you have some sort of condition that separates or prevents you from having to deal with reality, I can see that as being a potential trait that would be helpful. Someone with delusions of grandeur won't feel as much stress, because they're probably putting together a spreadsheet of how they'll spend all their money, or how they are going to give interviews on news programs, whereas you're spending time on a spreadsheet that goes over current and real finances, and thinking about how things can go wrong.
It isn't for everyone. Personally, I swapped to startups in part because I said, "in 10/20 years, would I be ok with not having a huge amount of money, but for having done this & taken on more risk, or would I prefer to be 'safe' financially & go the 'FIRE' route." I chose the latter. I think most should do the former. Sure, things are changing a bit with AI, but if you're an experienced dev, 99.999% of experienced devs are going to make more money, be financially safer, and happier/less stressed by working at a large company. That isn't to say there will be no stress at a large company, you'll still have stress, but you hopefully won't also be stressed about 401ks and the like.
At the end of the day, it is your life, so you'll have to decide how you would like to live it. Good luck! 😃
Obvious_Gap_5768@reddit (OP)
The 10/20 year framing is exactly how I thought about it too. I kept asking myself if I'd regret not trying more than I'd regret the financial hit. Answer was always yes
And yeah I'm definitely in the stressed spreadsheet camp, not the interview fantasy camp. Probably a good sign and a bad sign at the same time
Turbo-Teaching@reddit
You don’t have to quit the corporate job. Most people would be in general more successful being hired.
drumandfish@reddit
Ppl
Obvious_Gap_5768@reddit (OP)
Probably true for most people. Was true for me too for a while. The problem was I'd been building on the side for a year and my day job was getting the leftover energy, not the other way around. At that point staying felt like the riskier bet long term
PersianMG@reddit
You'll be fine, life is too short to not take risks. If you have proper runway, and did the hardest part of building a PoC while already employed, you're fine now to work on this. The fact that you're not solo (you're working on it with your wife) is also a huge plus because that is a daily reminder to be honest and work on the product.
Stop worrying about it and enjoy your life & new passion. Worst case scenario it doesn't work after 2 years, you learn a lot and you return to a better paying job anyway. Best case scenario, it takes off and you will have loved making this decision.
The only advice I would normally give is to not do this without runway (like some people take this type of risk but will run out of rent money in 2 months, that's not good and too much risk).
baloneysammich@reddit
Not sure I have advice, just solidarity.
When I was 25 I had decided to quit my job and move across the country. A few months before I planned on quitting was the dot com crash, and I didn’t really consider the magnitude of all that on my plan, or really the magnitude of risk in my plan at all.
That is, until the night after I quit, and I shut my eyes, and my brain said WHAT HAVE YOU DONE. Full on panic attack ensured.
But you know what? You’re taking a bet on yourself. You have skills, a plan, dedication, motivation. If this doesn’t work, something else will. Everything will be OK.
Obvious_Gap_5768@reddit (OP)
The pipeline point is real. Right now one POC going quiet can ruin my whole week. Need to fix that.
And yeah the 8 months of overlap was the best decision I made. Would've been paralyzed if I quit first and then tried to figure out what to build
shaq-ille-oatmeal@reddit
also sounds like you did the responsible version of this tbh. built for 8 months while employed got traction got enterprise interest and didnt quit on vibes alone. thats already more signal than most people have, enterprise sales is slow and weird for everyone especially as a tiny team. id probably focus less on “can this replace my salary soon” and more on building enough pipeline that no single poc emotionally controls your week. also worth leaning hard on tooling now. claude cursor runable crm automation etc matter way more once founder time becomes the bottleneck
AuspiciousDescent@reddit
so much AI slop in one thread.
Apart-Sleep1714@reddit
What you’re feeling sounds very normal for someone who just turned a “safe side project” into “this actually has to work.” Fear often arrives after the, not before, becauBut reading this objectively: you’ve done several things exceptionally well. You didn’t quit impulsively. You built while employed. You have runway. You already have enterprise interest and even an NDA with a large company. That doesn’t sound like jumping off a cliff, it sounds more like walking iThe biggest risk I see isn’t the product, it’s psychology and. Enterprise sales arIf I could offer one piece of advice: stop benchmar It’s the wrong metr ( ;