I have a REALLY shitty roommate.

I (25F) have a roommate [R](22M), my fiancé and my son all living here at this really nice house in a really nice and safe neighborhood. Before moving in, I was assured that he would be a good roommate. Well, he was not.

I confronted R, telling him I didn’t want R smoking in the house because of my sons health (he is 2 and has a heart murmur and smoke is bad of course) and the fact that his school does house check-ins occasionally, and I didn’t want that to happen around him. He ignored my text and called my Fiancé, telling him he doesn’t deal with “girlfriends” because every roommates girlfriend has hated him before.

I somewhat had to cave in because he mentioned how he was going to pay rent here and he deserves to use the space how he wants to and since I’m not working I felt like I had no say in it and told him to keep it to the patio. R has been smoking in the garage, leaving ash and roaches on the ground and kn the patio as well. Leaving his bong and weed out at arm level for my son. Then after moving in his first month he was late for rent despite coming a month late to save up. He spent all his money he had left over after moving out here for weed.

Then he complained that the electricity was too much even though he increased it by 60% since moving in, which is normal for it to go up with more people in the house but 60% was bad. He was leaving lights on all throughout the house over night since he would stay up until 6am. He would sleep on our sofa because he didn’t want to sleep in his room bc there was no tv. R left the garage door open over night when my fiancé leaves his keys in his bike and the keys in the car. He left the ebike my dad let him borrow outside over night.

I would cook him meals and he wouldn’t ever say thank you, but would only say thank you to my fiancé if he bought food like pizza or something and his whole time here he’s never helped in buying food. When I approached him about that yesterday, he said that he never asked for us to cook for him and that was all our own free will which just feels kind of shitty because yeah we were doing it for him but even a thank you would have been nice for all the hard work I does to cook and meal plan.

Today, my son was taking a nap and R slammed the door, waking my son up. I texted him asking if he could be a little more quiet when my son is sleeping, here are the texts verbatim:

Me: “Can you be a little quieter when he’s sleeping?”

R: “What the fuck are you even talking about”

Me: “My son? When he’s napping. You just woke him up”

R: “I’ll move around this house how I please. Yall wake me up all morning while I’m sleeping trying to get ready for work. Do I ever text you bitching about it? Stop texting my phone with bullshit or ill block your number”
(Mind you it’s 9-10am)

Me: “I can’t control how loud my son is but you can control how you act and how loud you are”

R: “Nah I won’t. Have the same respect”

Me: “Also [fiancé] says you have until mid June to figure out a new place to live, we found someone else to take your place here”

R: “Shit ain’t a one way street idk who tf you think you are. I done told yall I don’t have to leave.”

Truth is, by the terms of the lease, we can’t kick him out without him wanting to leave and signing a document. He refuses to leave and honestly I don’t feel safe with him here with me and son while my fiancé is at work. I called my complex and they said I can try for a restraining order, but I don’t have enough threat for that in my state.

What can I do to get him to simply leave or to somewhat threaten me/break something so I can get a restraining order to force him to leave?