I am a late Gen Xer but was a young mother. I was divorced by 23 years old, ex-husband shortly after got ill and unable to provide, I put myself through college on my own dime all while raising a child. It was exhausting as even in college I was working and taking care of an infant and paying for childcare (though I did get help and lived with my mom for a few years). After I graduated, I ended up getting a good job but it was constant on the move, running from my job to help my child, getting dinner ready, etc (I moved out after I graduated because my parents needed space). My mom got ill in my late thirties and my early forties was even harder - a teenager/young adult at home but also staying nights and days between work to help with my mom.

After my daughter went off to college I had a boyfriend move in a year later. It was fine for a while but I often felt obligated to give him attention I didn't really have left at the end of the day. When my daughter came home from college, he ended up renting a room from a friend instead but he still stays here most nights. I think he was pretty much just annoyed with my child being home, but whatever, her house too.

The issue I'm having is, I am pooped at the end of the day. If I'm not paying attention, he feels insulted. He constantly wants to have dinners together, but I don't really like to do that. I like getting things like shrimp out of the freezer and making a quesadilla with it. Or, I'll order a door dash from a nice place and eat it three nights in a row. I want to come home and play a video game or something. He's very social and outgoing and can spend hours an evening socializing with friends and then come to my place and want to talk it up some more. Also, since it's my house there is a lot of overhead cleaning figuring out the mortgage, etc.

Does anybody have the type of relationship where they feel perfectly free to come home and make what they want for dinner without planning? Possibly play a game? Not feel obligated to spend the evening talking?