How different is ‘work you’ vs ‘real you’?

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JennyW93@reddit

Someone at work started calling me the entirely wrong name a few months ago. Not sure why, because we’d worked together for two years at that point.

Anyway, I decided to lean in. So now there’s Jessica, who is my work persona, and Jenny, who is my free time persona. Jessica is a tradwife. Jenny is a lesbian. Jessica really wants to see photos when you’re back from holiday! Jenny couldn’t give less of a shit about your private life. Etc.

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Pyrex_Living@reddit

The real question isn’t why you seem different in different worlds.

It’s: what is it that never changes, even as every version of “you” comes and goes?

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Particular_History50@reddit

Care assistant here. Rainbows and sunshine at work,grumpy bitch at home 💅

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ladylots2@reddit

The real me doesn’t care about stakeholder expectations and driving up the share price.

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runrduck@reddit

I’m super organised at work but don’t have the energy to keep that up 24/7.

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rjisont@reddit

Same, very organised and polished at work but that means I don’t have the time or energy to look after my place

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joan2468@reddit

I thought it was just me lmao

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SnoopyLupus@reddit

Swearing. Fuck all else.

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joan2468@reddit

Same here for me. Work me and real me are not too dissimilar except work me doesn’t reveal the deeply personal parts of my life and only talks about a “safe range” of topics.

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EhDinnaeEvenKen@reddit

Similar to this, except it's my dialect as well as the swearing.

In work - All phone voice all the time. I'm being paid to be understood.

Outside of work - "Eh'm no cheenjin thi wiy eh speak fir nae cunt, if yer no piyin is, aff ye pop."

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marquoth_@reddit

Funnily enough I swear more at work.

I'm in software in a team that never has to deal with the public and everybody is a bit "no filter", including the women.

Then I have a two year old at home and spend a lot of time with my in-laws so I'm on my best behaviour.

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SnoopyLupus@reddit

I can see that. I’ve had jobs where I didn’t need to care so much. It’s so situation dependent.

My most recent job (I may be retired now, not sure), we were dealing with the US a lot, and we had a QA person who dropped off a call because our team leader called herself an arsehole.

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liquidpagan@reddit

Gotta give us context on the not sure if you're required

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JimDixon@reddit

I'm retired now, but I think I used to be more extraverted at work. I was in customer service, and I used to make small talk with customers a lot. It helped to pass the time and make the job more interesting. It would have been boring and repetitious without it.

I have a lot less human interaction now, and when I do have to interact with strangers (I'm always the customer now) I'm a lot less inclined to talk than I used to be.

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GlastoKhole@reddit

People’s heads would fall off if they saw me in real life. I am the complete opposite of who I am in work, but I work a corporate job and I’m much more an “on the tools” personality

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tx1998@reddit

Quite different. I definitely tone my accent down a lot (usually fairly RP) and have to just fit in with people who are the polar opposite of me (quite informal, extroverted). Have Asperger’s so it’s a lot of masking which almost burns right through me on the worst of days…

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nikokazini@reddit

I’m much more polite and patent at work. In my personal life, I’m not paid to tolerate idiocy, so don’t

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cragglerock93@reddit

I'm the exact opposite.

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cragglerock93@reddit

Very, very different. I'm quite a patient, calm person outside of work. I get stressed but I keep it to myself and if I'm dealing with anyone in public I'm extremely polite. At work a lot of my lazier colleagues and some of the customers just piss me off and I'm very poor at hiding it. I'm a lot nicer outside of work.

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buxx77@reddit

I made friends at work once and got burned. Now 15 years in to a IT Infrastructure role I worked my way up to from a help desk.

I turn up, work hard, help, be polite and smile. I'll talk to you about what ever you like and your hobbies while giving away as little as possible about my own family life and interests.

I don't let my guard down even though in my personal life im relaxed, social and creative. Not crossing those boundaries has served me well as harsh as I think it comes across at times.

Work = Work

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TheBluePapaBear@reddit

Mostly just how openly I break wind.

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Brizzledude65@reddit

I’ve always considered work as an acting gig. I play the corporate character I need to in work - it bears little resemblance to the person my family and friends know, and that’s fine. Wearing a constant mask can get hard work at times though I admit.

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Additional_Read_4671@reddit

acting gig 😂😂 that made me laugh LOL

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Amazing_Goal_8003@reddit

Work me is highly organised, productive and “detail oriented”

Home me has raging ADHD and has gone without proper meals twice this week because I forgot to put the batch cooked meals into the actual fridge

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Aceleeds@reddit

Work me is middle classish. Home me is rough as a badger arse. Please don’t judge me it’s totally necessary. Code switching isn’t easy.

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Amazing_Goal_8003@reddit

I feel you. I feel this deep in my soul and it hurts. I just want it to be socially acceptable to be a bit rough round the edges because frankly, I’m better than half the middle class twits at my job AND their jobs combined anyway 😂

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1whoisconcerned@reddit

Most people think I’m insane outside as well as inside work. They’re not wrong.

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Relative_Shop4676@reddit

Plus most of Reddit thinks you're insane..

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Amazing_Goal_8003@reddit

I’ve met her, can confirm she IS insane

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NoodleDoodlesocks@reddit

I'm a lot more sociable outside of work. I don't like to chat while working. It's far too distracting and wastes a lot of time.

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Cool_Doubt2152@reddit

I’m Type A at work - planner, hyper organised, insanely efficient, get shit done under pressure, react quickly and get results

I’m Type B at home - so laid back I may as well be horizontal, pretty go with the flow, time is a fictional construct, texting my husband I’m on my way when my hair is still wet, 30 minute showers… you get the gist

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decentlyfair@reddit

I am the same at work or home mostly. Home me swears significantly more.

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thesteelmaker@reddit

I am definitely 2 different people. Home me is a lot different from work me. I am on the spectrum, high functioning. Home me is very socially awkward, I have no interest in people and always prefer to do things on my own. I am a master of procrastination.

At work, I don't stop. I am a Team Leader, have been a manager in the past. Always hitting KPI's. I am a Master in my last craft. I have no communication problems and happily challenge my supervisors and managers, when they make hasty decisions. 9 times out of 10 they will rethink their decision. I am the person that gets shit done.

The difference, masking. I mask well because I have a nickname at work. So home me is me, work me is nickname. It has worked well for 36 years.

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jay19903562@reddit

Work as a signaller on the railway. Can goof around white a lot anyway when things are running smooth. Have to be serious when stuff goes wrong.

But that's very similar to real life tbh.

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CreativeAdeptness477@reddit

Not all that different at all really, but then my work is sitting alone in a van so I don't have to code switch or anything, just apply general politeness and so forth to colleagues and randoms during the brief interactions we do have.

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BirthdayBoth304@reddit

Far more smiley, extraverted and enthusiastic at work (very demanding people-focused role). The job absolutely takes it out of me. Home me is quieter, reflective, quirky.

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shortercrust@reddit

Work me isn’t that different really, and I don’t think work me is any less real. There are loads of mes and they and they’re all really me. There son me, brother me, friend me and lover me. All different but all me.

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Roanmor@reddit

Nah I am myself at work, but with less swearing. You only live once, so I am going to really enjoy being myself to the maximum.

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Away-Organization630@reddit

FA difference except some personals weekends would have work me fired

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Sevennationarmy69@reddit

Work me is usually the senior person on site and I’m extremely decisive. At home it takes me hours to decide on which takeaway to order or what to watch on Netflix

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moosebeast@reddit

Don't tell anyone, but 'real me' is not at all passionate about delivering exceptional customer service.

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ashamedstopfordian@reddit

🏅

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SeniorBit7051@reddit

2 different people
There is the social meat work cause I have to
Then there is the I can’t be bothered with people outside

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braddoismydoggo@reddit

I'm old enough and I've been at my employer long enough that I am myself at all times. I'd hate to have a job where I had to be someone else all day.

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HeatheryLeathery@reddit

There are various versions of work me. With colleagues? I'm pretty much the same as normal me. But I'm a therapist, so I have to be different with patients (i.e. be less of a sarcastic arsehole). And different patients need different things, so "working with patients me" isn't even the same.

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CodeToManagement@reddit

At the core there’s no difference - the stuff I care about I advocate for at work etc

The difference is outside of work I’m more willing to just chill out and go with the flow whereas at work I’m in a leadership position and so have to be at the front and getting people to do things / building up the motivation etc. At work I’m a lot more outgoing whereas at home I’d be happier to just chill and not do that stuff.

At work I also have to be more confrontational and push on things which isn’t always me at home

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Ok-Avocado-57@reddit

Totally different. People at work think I'm sensible and organised etc. I'm total chaos in real life.

Also when we started working from home during the pandemic, my wife got to hear all the twatty language I use on my work calls that I would never use in any other context.

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evelynsmee@reddit

I unmasked about COVID time. Not on purpose but there's no going back.

Now they all know I'm mental

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Tea_no_sugar@reddit

After 15 years in the same tech related field… I’ve literally become “work me”.

I used to be anxious, awkward and disorganised as a person. But after years of pretending to be confident, and pretending to know shit - at some point I guess I actually became a confident person who knows shit.

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SnoopyLupus@reddit

That’s true. I mean, it’s not really faking it ‘til you make it. It’s just getting more confident with age, because of your experience in work.

I’m the same. People think I’m confident, unafraid of expressing my opinions. I’m not really, I’m just older and better at this shit because I’ve been through it.

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RiceeeChrispies@reddit

Completely different, I have to mask at work (‘tism etc.) - and I do this quite well (in my opinion).

I need most of the time outside of work to recharge so I’m a complete zombie outside of work. It ain’t healthy, but needs must.

I also live about an hour away, so slim chance of seeing people I know from work.

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JamJarre@reddit

I've been at my work for a decade so they're basically the same. I have no work persona anymore

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taxidermypotatofrog@reddit

Work me is social, chatty and doesn’t mind people, the real me is introverted as hell and avoids people and going out as much as possible

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kwack250@reddit

99% of people in my work know nothing about me and I love it. They use my Sunday name but every other person who knows me calls me a variant of my name which I’ve been known as all my life.

Had to take paternity leave and loads of people in my team were shocked to find out I already have a kid.

In work I’m responsible, professional and assertive. Outside work I’m quiet, lazy and reserved.

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TomL79@reddit

I’m not exactly the same, but there’s similarities. I think I’m pretty organised and structured in work, know what I’m doing etc. I can delegate, support, troubleshoot. Outside of work, I’m a wreck, disorganised, procrastinate, struggle holding things together. I’m introverted both in and out of work, I don’t hide my hobbies so I do talk about them at work when appropriate/relevant. We don’t have a dress code, so the days when I’m working in the office I pretty much dress the same as always T-Shirt/Sweatshirt, Jeans and Trainers.

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omgee1975@reddit

Exactly The Same

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InkedDoll1@reddit

I think I'm pretty much the same, apart from my appearance bc we wear a uniform to work. Whenever I see someone from work outside of the office they always compliment my outfit!

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hdruk@reddit

Two very different people. I wouldn't have it any other way. I like being able to turn off my work self at the end of the day, it's part of how I ensure there is a clear boundary between work and life.

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soyundinosaurioverde@reddit

I am a teacher. At work I am very strict and probably cold. I do really care about my students but I don't like to show it because I am scared of being taken advantage of. Also, I try my best to be fair but some students don't like that. At home, I swear, i openly show my love to my husband. I am quite soft with him and my friends and I just do a lot of things that my students would never imagine... Probably because they think I am very boring. For example, last week a teacher friend told some students we went to a pub and they were showed about me doing something like that.

In both places I am still very hardworking and I always do my best. Also I complaint a lot ar home and at work !

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RichKiernan@reddit

Has changed as I have moved up in levels of management. When I was "on the tools" no difference but now I have to fake agree and nod along to things I think are complete bullshit but it pays the bills

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dopeasfgirl@reddit

I feel like I wear a mask when I go into work I’m in a senior management role, the expectation is to act and be a certain way. Very different outside of work I’m dealing with having bipolar disorder and battling constantly with my mental health. People in work wouldn’t have a clue what goes on in my real day to day life

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SpatulaWholesale@reddit

At work I'm senior. I'm technical. I'm respected. I mentor. People look to me for answers and guidance.

At home I have no idea how to do anything and am a big goofball.

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_Jay-Garage-A-Roo_@reddit

Quite different. But it’s not just work. I have rest of world me and the me my husband gets (real me).

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Mammyjam@reddit

Used to when I was junior and insecure, now I'm senior and the company is fucked if I leave so I'm perfectly happy to call people a cunt when I need to

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danmingothemandingo@reddit

These fuckers telling me to bring my authentic self to work. Forgive them lord, for they know not what they ask

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Alternative-Emu2000@reddit

Work me talks posh and says things like "of course sir" and "I'm afraid that isn't something that we're able to provide at this time", mainly because we have clients from far-off exotic places like Singapore, Hong Kong, and Surrey who wouldn't be able to understand my accent otherwise.

Real me talks normal, and says things like "aye, garn then" and "fuck off knobhead".

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alphahydra@reddit

I think I'm basically the same in both contexts. I maybe swear less and don't talk about certain things, but I don't have the nerve and cringe-resistance to fake a whole different persona, LinkedIn-style.

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Kim_catiko@reddit

When I am new, I am very subdued, but after a while, I can't help but be myself. I find it hard to keep my inner thoughts that way. Thankfully I haven't got in trouble yet. Most people think I am joking when I say some out of pocket shit.

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-GrantUsEyes-@reddit

I’m exactly the same inside and out of work.

I don’t want to work somewhere I have to pretend.

It’s worked out pretty well for me, to be honest!

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Wonder_Shrimp@reddit

I'm an Introvert who enjoys customer service

Work me is pepper and chatty and loves to make small-talk and get excited about spending money

Home me is the complete opposite to that

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JunzyB316@reddit

Work me does F all and real me does F all

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Jcw28@reddit

No, mostly the same. I don't see any value in putting on an act or playing a character. The only major difference is that at work I get things done whereas at home I'm absolutely a 'play before work' type so I'll absolutely prioritise gaming and other fun over boring stuff like housework.

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01R0Daneel10@reddit

Yep work me is considerate, professional and focused. At home me is almost the opposite untill I have to do boring adult stuff

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