For the context: I am a tech lead with 9 YOE. I started as a backend dev in Java, did a year there but pivoted to the frontend after, where I focused on React and Next. I consider myself an expert in those fields and FE in general. In the meanwhile I was doing some backend, but not something that I'd call sophisticated. It was mostly Node with nest, sometimes express. I also leveraged the next.js capabilities for some BFF patterns with simple dbs like Prisma.

Currently I am leading two teams across three projects, where we have react + backend on AWS - lambdas + various aws goodies. This backend is more of a BFF, nothing I'd consider anything sophisticated. We also maintain a private npm registry with various shareable (within our org) modules.

Now, to the point: I feel like I am missing something. I see a hard push for fullstack roles on the market, being a proficient FE dev isn't a valuable option. Yet I don't think I have enough backend experience to call myself a true fullstack (although my LinkedIn say so). So while I understand the application layer of the backend app I do not the data layer and the system layer. So these are my learning priorities now: distributed systems, AWS solutions architect certification and databases. I read DDIA by Kleppman (what was hard) and couple of system design books. I want to go through some postgres bible and then go for Cantrill Solutions architect associate course.

And I have two questions:

I am not sure if I will be able to call myself an architect. I had a really hard time reading Kleppman - my reading pace was 5-10 pages per hour as I needed to constantly Google, ask Claude and draw these concepts. They were foreign to me. Now when I see a fraction of challenges that distributed systems comes up with, I doubt I will be able to handle them specifically without a backend experience. FE had it's own challenges, performance issues etc, but it wasn't anywhere near the replicated, partitioned databases. So the question - any advice on this? Will the theory of that be sufficient, do I need to step back to be a backend engineer?

The second one, is about the learning capability perhaps? I am pushing very hard for learning 1-2 hours per day. My job is taking me 6-10h, I'm learning before the job. Since when I started learning the quality of my work dropped since I often can't keep working 8h and am finishing after 6h. I am starting to have sharp motivation drops. Honestly, I feel like I have a nail in my head after finishing such marathon. I have literally zero cognitive capacity for doing anything even remotely requiring using brain. I have trouble remembering the grocery list. So the second question - is there something wrong with me? Someone was in a similar situation and can advise something?

Thanks!