ULPT How to discourage someone from smoking near me all the time at work

Posted by Admirable_Munch@reddit | UnethicalLifeProTips | View on Reddit | 12 comments

I work in an office and we’ve been having complaints about cigarette smoke from the garage entering the building through the stairwells and elevators. There was also a note placed near the ash tray about that which was ripped off. Then the building manager sent out an email about it. I personally had nothing to do with it but agree it’s a problem.

I have a usual parking spot and this person who works in my building insists on parking next to me and smoking a fat cigarette, which is fine other than I have asthma. It gets in my car, it gets in the stairwell, it gets everywhere. I’ve moved spots and it seems she purposefully parks next to me to smoke, like she thinks I’m the one who made the complaints.

I want to find a way to deter her from continuing to find me and smoke near me. I was thinking fart spray? Any thoughts would be appreciated.

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swakins@reddit

Is it assigned parking? If I could I would park away from that car. I would hate smoke too, so I would do all I could to avoid it instead of just blaming them for doing what they are allowed.

yomammaaaaa@reddit

I don't have any unethical tips, but if you set your in car air conditioner/heater to recycle the in cabin air before you turn off your car, you should be able to lessen or eliminate the smoke from entering your vehicle. Also works for keeping small animals out of your car.

The button should look like this if you have it.

Witty_and_Blingy@reddit

This is absolutely incredible advice because I never know when to use that!

dodgethisredpill@reddit

In a tunnel or when passing recently manured fields ;)

professionally-baked@reddit

Play shitty music loud

Green_Yesterday3054@reddit

Report it to HR. Say you have asthma and this person’s smoking is causing you health issues. The ethical advice is better than the unethical advice in this instance. Oh, and put a piss disc in her drawer.

Jerking_From_Home@reddit

Piss disc in the air intake of the car. It’ll smell like piss whenever she turns the climate control on.

What is a piss disk?

InquisitiveMushroom@reddit

a frozen disk. of piss

ichosethis@reddit

Start looking nervous whenever she's around. Awkwardly leave conversations if she walks into the room. Ask if anyone has noticed her following you. Make it weird and act like you think she's stalking you. Tell someone that you moved where you park and she moved too.

Don't mention smoking, just make it about stalking.

ACynicalOptomist@reddit

Spray bottle, like how you train cats, you just spray them with the water.

i-am-foxymoron@reddit

Any possibility she likes you and is hitting on you?

If not, how good of an actor are you? If you can cry on cue I would do so from now on wherever she starts smoking. Unless she's a monster she'll have to ask why. Say you feel guilty because you smoked around your (baby, sister, brother) and they recently past away of lung cancer.