Do you want any of your parents' stuff? If so, what is it and why? If not, why?
Posted by iAmAmbr@reddit | GenX | View on Reddit | 237 comments
Im a baby Gen X. Born 1979, and my mom is 72 going on 100...
I find myself not wanting any of my mother's stuff except for this ashtray that she has that's really thick and heavy and made of red glass. I don't even smoke cigarettes inside anymore, but I have always enjoyed looking at that damn thing since I can remember.
It's like a bunch of cylinders with round tops and bottoms surrounding a really thick disk of glass that was just concave enough to contain all the butts and ashes.
One of my after-school chores was to dump all the ashtrays! š¤¢
My mom still uses that ashtray to this day inside her house. To the point that my kids and I have to stay elsewhere when we make the 9 hour drive to visit.
But by God, I don't want to deal with selling her house. There's no sentimental heirloom jerewley that I am aware of. The only thing that I want is this ashtray that I used to stare at and think about how pretty it was and has been around my mom since I can remember. I'll use it for coins or candy or something. I've wanted that thing since before I knew what it was.
Someone tell me they know what kind of ashtray I'm talking about. I've seen others. But most were smaller and thinner, and none of them were such pretty red glass. Even if it wasn't red glass, does anyone else know the style of ashtray I'm trying to describe?
Zeca_77@reddit
They do have a great collection of vinyl records, but I live abroad, so shipping them would be a pain. We don't have a good relationship, so I'm probably not getting anything.
am312@reddit
We had all taken any little items we wanted from my mom's apartment several years go. She has dementia and went into a nursing home in November so we had to clean out her apartment. She was a heavy smoker and had animals so everything was junk. We hired a junk hauler company who came in and emptied the whole place into a dumpster in an hour and a half. It was weird that someone's whole existence could disappear that quickly.
longagofaraway@reddit
my parents are collectors of all kinds of esoteric bricabrac. tin banks, glass lamps, antique furniture from multiple periods, african, mesopotamian, and other indiginous artifacts (like arroheads, masks, carvings, tools, musical instruments, etc.), revolutionary era items of the same description.
i couldn't begin to describe it all. they've filled two houses and a barn with all this crap. it's everywhere, every shelf, every windowsill, every flat surface and every inch of wall is covered in it.
the collection impressive in it's scale if nothing else. they had it appraised several years ago and have something in the area of about 8 volumes of binders. of course, they've been adding the entire time since then. to me it's all a ticking time bomb i want nothing to do with regardless of any potential value. i neither want any of it nor want to deal with the vultures who will descend to feast upon it after their passing.
my life is deliberately minimalist in comparison. every time i come home from visiting them i start looking at what i can throw out.
Aromatic_Location@reddit
I don't even want any of my stuff anymore.
Numerous-Coast-2592@reddit
I just said, I dont want my stuff, why would I want theirs.
Numerous-Coast-2592@reddit
My brother and I had a plan. He was going to take all the family heirlooms and pass them out or down to my kids or his step kids, whomever showed interest and was responsible. I want a handful of things. I have been living and taking care of them for a little under a decade and i plan on selling all my stuff and traveling after they pass. Well that selfish MF died and left me to deal with everything (mostly joking, brother died suddenly a couple months ago and im still reeling from the loss). Now I dont have a plan for a 30 totes of Christmas decorations which only 3 ever get used, the baby stuff from me, my brother and my kids none of us want, or the litany of stuff my mother has collected. She isnt a horder but she could be so easily.
She thinks we are getting a dumpster and, honestly, I might. I have begged her to whittle down what is important as I was the one who had to go through my brother's things and he was "a collector". The emotional distress was enough, I came home and started selling my stuff or donating it. I dont want my stuff, why would I want theirs.
vectorology@reddit
Iām so sorry for your loss and also for the additional burden of having to deal with the practical issues from his passing. I was my parentsā executor and had to deal with that. I canāt imagine dealing with a siblingās as well.
When my last parent died, I did a sweep for anything valuable (nothing - one of my siblings had already cleaned out my momās small jewellery collection), guns (so, so many because America), sentimental items (few, mostly photos, most things were too smoke damaged), and cleared out personal papers to reduce identity theft (this was the hardest because it was a mess of family documents and medical papers mixed with random receipts from 20-40 years ago). I was pretty brutal, for example getting rid of massive amounts of old photos, mostly unlabelled, unorganised and in duplicates, tchotchkes that might remind me of my mom but I had no room for, etc.
Then I hired an estate sales firm to sell what they could and dispose of the rest. I havenāt missed anything thatās gone and am so glad I didnāt try to keep more.
Hire the skip, get an estate sales company or similar to help clear out stuff if thatās a thing where you live, and free yourself.
Apprehensive_Glove_1@reddit
Mom's last lucid moment was all about what she wanted us kids to have. My daughter got a diamond necklace, my sisters got a bunch of stuff, but she just apologized to me and said she didn't have anything for me. I'm a guy, so I get that, most of her stuff was jewelry/girly stuff. Still kinda hurt to hear, even though i never let on that it did. I knew this was her surge so I just smiled and told her it was ok.
SuperJen411@reddit
Hugs ā¤ļø
Apprehensive_Glove_1@reddit
Thanks. It's been over a year... I miss her like hell, but I'm OK. I got lucky, she was a really good person and a damn good mom.
penguin_stomper@reddit
Mom is 79, Dad died 8 years ago. Sell it and send me my share. Childhood wasn't super-happy and there's nothing in the house I have any emotion about.
Bumpyslide@reddit
Mums musical ornament it seems to activate itself only after someone close to us dies so we take it that they are letting us know they are ok, so if anything happens to either of us weāve said weāll set it off, so I need it. A bit woo but there it is
HornetParticular6625@reddit
When our mother dies, my sister and I are getting a dumpster and everything is going to be thrown out.
rottenbox@reddit
Similar plan to me for my mom and inlaws (dad died and my step mom and I dealt with the cleanup).
One day for family to come and take any family heirlooms they want. Not "can you save this for us and we will get it later" it'll be on this Saturday come and get it or you'll miss out. Then an estate auction. Then I get a bin dropped off and start tossing.
HornetParticular6625@reddit
Our mom moved to be closer to her granddaughters, but never actually became active in their lives. I never had children. These are my kids. My sister has taken the brunt of everything dealing with our mom, and there's nothing we could want from her tiny one bedroom apartment.
OnehappyOwl44@reddit
My parents divorced right after I left home and started new lives so none of the things I had an attachment too really exist. My mom got rid of any jewlery my dad gave her and her entire decore changed. There might be a Christmas ornament or two that I'd like to have but not much more than that. I don't like clutter so any big things will just be donated when she dies. My dad died years ago and he was living overseas at the time so we didn't get to sort through his things at all.
Traditional_Ad_5859@reddit
I want my dad's Air Force Academy tunic and sabre.
ButterflyOld8220@reddit
The colander. It's totally stupid. Mom was dating dad's roommate in college. They broke up and dad started dating mom. (He has always claimed that he didn't want to loose their cook.) They bought a metal colander for 25Ā¢ in 1967 ish. They still have it!! Married August 1968. Moved through several military bases, then Chicago, and finally Boulder. I named it the "Holey Bowl". I swear my brother and I will fight over this 60+ year old colander. We strained 100's of bowls of Mac & Cheese in this holey bowl.
Personal_Zucchini_20@reddit
Maybe make it a yearly Christmas or birthday gift. Give it back and forth and when one dies it goes to a kid that will gift it back and forth between cousins or siblings.
Fur_Nurdle_on67@reddit
All I really wanted of Mom's was her dented Revere Ware mixing bowl with the ring handle. I ended up with the house. I still treasure that bowl.
anironicfigure@reddit
that's amazing!!!!
PuzzleheadedOwl1191@reddit
That is not stupid at all! Itās an icon of your familyās story. I love this so much more than the usual family fights over āvaluableā things that are devoid of real meaning.
bookworthy@reddit
Struggling more that my remaining parent is gone and we are cleaning out their house (showings already booked for this weekend so we had better hurry!). I have had to make myself very rigid and throw things away, donate them, give them to others, etc.
But inside, I want to keep it all. And I have a small house full of my stuff already. lol
melodypowers@reddit
My mom died suddenly when I was 30. Because of her shitty landlord, my sister and I had 5 days to empty her apartment. I took a lot. Some of it I used. We had her china and silverware for family events. All of her albums. Much of it moved to my basement and then the garage at our next house.
I recently downsized and finally went through it. I have some things and my adult kids to others.
My dad and step mom downsized to move to Florida and then again when they moved to a retirement community in the city where my brother lives and where my recently graduated daughter also happened to be moving to. She ended up with most of their kitchen stuff and other daily use things. They kept offering me and my siblings things but none of us had space or interest. They had an estate sale and donated 15k to charity.
BonezOz@reddit
I don't even know what's left. My parent's sold the family home sometime after 2006 after nearly 30 years, so they could go travelling. They've only recently settled in a new place, 5 or 6 years ago, and of course it's mortgaged and my father turns 80 this November, so if they pass, I reckon the bank will reclaim anything that's left.
yourilluminaryfriend@reddit
My mom spent several years cleaning out her house and throwing out what nobody wanted. Everything that was left is now in my house since she moved in with me. Itās mostly furniture, and Iāll probably keep most of it.
melodypowers@reddit
Swedish death cleaning. It is such a good movement.
https://a.co/d/0gVGxgti
VincentVan_Dough@reddit
Yes, I want it all. They collect antiques, jewelry and watches, all extremely valuable. Their furniture is incredible too, original midcentury modern pieces.
VincentVan_Dough@reddit
His parents collect art and furniture. These are Daliās Zodiac II Suite from 1975 and the chairs are from the 60s that we had restored. Theyāre still alive but are trying to downsize their life.
dog4cat2@reddit
I had they options of getting what I wanted. It was not all of their stuff and some came from their parents
accidentallyHelpful@reddit
I'm having this personal discussion with somebody
I get home and open my laptop and the banner ad is this article:
Forbes Magazine: Sorry Nobody Wants Your Parents Stuff
justwannadance0909@reddit
This article explained so much to me, thank you for sharing. I wanted to ask this specific question about OUR children wanting items passed down to us. These generations are now minimalists. They are the computer age and have no desire for old family photos and albums or antique clocks. The furniture weāve inherited does not go with the āIKEAā age that is now. Probably not interested in antique dishes, or carnival glass. All of it will probably be thrown out once we are gone. It kind of makes me sad, but I feel that we are the last generation to hold onto tangible memories of our past.
accidentallyHelpful@reddit
The whole experience is cuckoo. I have an inherited antique clock that doesn't yet fit here. Outlived technology: 78rpm albums. Surely worth something, I let the fancy gilded plates go to a family member who cared. It is difficult.
Kindly-Emotion-5083@reddit
'78 model here. I moved back home to look after Dad when Mum passed suddenly. In 2024. We're a close rural family, same family home inherited from my grandmother's land, the family home was a worker's house originally. Dad has two sheds full of tools and equipment, lathe, saws, all sorts.
I want the house because it is 'The Family Home'. I can't imagine anyone outside family living here while I'm still around. There's over 50yrs of accumulation, furniture, generational crockery etc.
It's not really about taking or wanting stuff. More about just stepping into the role of 'our family ' and continuation of our presence in my home town of about 1000.
So it's more about taking on legacy than the actual stuff. I have taken on Mum's role as Secretary of the local history trust.
There is so much stuff I'll just merge into the place and sort the things as I go.
Traditional_Fan_2655@reddit
I wanted the chipped candy platter my mom had for her homemade fudge. It was really all that mattered.
HaloTightens@reddit
I might know the ashtray you mean. I always loved looking at one that my grandparents had, and I did end up with it! Similar to these?Ā https://theapartmentlife.com/cdn/shop/products/4E7FF1B7-680F-4BAF-868B-DF975E913C34_1000x1000.jpg?v=1638221499
OkGate7788@reddit
If thatās it, I love it š„°
Techchick_Somewhere@reddit
Wait thatās an ashtray?? I swore it was a candle holder.
Stefgrep66@reddit
Both died since Covid.
Dad remarried so everything he had is theirs, no idea if he had old pics and stuff, that would be interesting to see. Got a good relationship with my dad's wife, I'll have to ask her.
My sister lived with my mum, and after she died she stayed living there. It's a static home on a park for the over 50s, it's nice, and my sis seems content.
Mum left us a modest inheritance, but for all my sister did for her after a stroke and dementia took hold I gave her my half, she earned every penny of that money.
ST0IC_@reddit
Everything I'll get is getting donated to the Tropic Lightning Museum. He's got a lot of really cool Vietnam war stuff. He was worried what was going to happen to it when he passes, and I'm the one who made the suggestion. I told him that it would finally give me a reason to visit hawaii, and he said you're welcome.
TakkataMSF@reddit
There's a wooden wind-up clock that my grandfather repaired in the 1950s. He was dumpster diving in Amsterdam. Mom said it needs like $500 worth of work because of springs and all that. I don't think it was a special clock at the time. We called it a Grandmother clock (like grandfather only it hangs on the wall, smaller). Both my sister and myself remember the gong sound it made. And winding it up (it's got a key and everything!).
For some reason we both like that clock. There's also a bible that a lot of mom's folks signed (back to like 1875ish), births and deaths. It doesn't mean as much to me though. I'm not sure why. It's delicate af. We'll need to figure out how best to preserve it. I'd like to preserve the page(s) that were signed at least. I think we both hope that those can be kept in the family. An interesting tie to the past. We'll see.
justwannadance0909@reddit
My sister got the grandfather clock, I inherited the grandmother clock. Both are so old and neither work but we love them. They are so full of memories.
justwannadance0909@reddit
When my grandma died, the only one left in the immediate family was my Aunt. My Dad, Uncle and Papaw were already gone. My sister and I helped my Aunt go through my grandparentās house and she systematically threw their entire lives into a huge dumpster. We took out things that were special us, my sister and I. She took my grandpas antique toys, we both took the antique clocks that had hung on their walls our entire lives and I took all of the heirloom dishes and every family photo my grandma had collected her whole adult life. She was into genealogy and now I have family photos all the way back to tin types. My Aunt wanted nothing. It still befuddles me to this day.
Blue-Skye-@reddit
My mom gave me my grandparentās carnival glass punch bowl. Itās useless but so pretty loved it since I was a kid. I put it in my china cabinet with all my other treasures that will likely get sold or donated when I die. But sometimes I like to turn the light on and look at the colors.
justwannadance0909@reddit
I got my great-great-grandmotherās punch bowl and other glass items passed down to my grandmother. They are priceless to me.
dreaminginteal@reddit
From my Dad, I got a pocket watch that had been his grandfather's.
His second wife and their two kids got the rest,.
From my Mom, I asked the assisted living facility to grab a couple of the lacquer boxes we brought her from Russia. And a book on the artist Alphons Mucha. Sent one of the lacquer boxes to her younger sister. My step-dad got the rest.
FantasticWeasel@reddit
Kept very little when my beloved mum passed. Samples of her handwriting, a bit of fabric from a dress which I couldn't part with and a little costume jewellery ring which she loved.
My parents had a cool 1970s sofa but it is long gone, that was the only thing I might have liked for my own taste rather than sentimental value.
Don't think it is a generation thing, just don't want to live in a museum of anyone else's stuff.
scarlettohara1936@reddit
My mom has a r/uraniumglass collection... Just. WOW!!
Rubberbangirl66@reddit
I know how to get rid of it, it does not scare me
bkward@reddit
When my dad passed, my mom threw everything that he owned and anything that reminded her of him in the dumpster. Even his leather jacket. Not because she didn't love him, but because she did so so much. It was too painful to be alone without him after 60 years, and she was "surrounded by him" - her words. She just wanted everything gone so she could begin to figure out how to move on. She kinda forgot about us. Ooops.
OkGate7788@reddit
My mum let her church āfriendsā come & go through all his tools & equipment. He restored vehicles & taught motor mechanics. Anything we asked to keep as his kids, she threw away or sold.
UKophile@reddit
That is an unusual response to the death of a loved one.
Astronaut6735@reddit
Loss and grief do strange things to people.
bkward@reddit
Yeah, we thought so too.
CitizenjaneEast@reddit
SO MUCH CRAP in my parents house.
Iām 1976 and while they are young boomers - they are working class lite hoarders who have aged very poorly.
Not looking forward to that clean out AT ALL.
OkGate7788@reddit
Dead dad - mum clean hoards & ruins everything. Two four bedroom houses, a 3 bay shedā¦ Only bitterness to take, Iād prefer it gone. I have no desire to engage with my siblings, either.
Vanth_in_Furs@reddit
I feel this so much.
Safe-Comfort-29@reddit
A Hoosier cupboard and my dad's Navy sea chest. Nothing else
Brilliant-Spray6092@reddit
I got some photos, a cocktail ring & a scarf. Didn't want anything else
Smittles@reddit
My dad has a couple guitars and a fuck ton of sculptures. Those sculptures will last a thousand years or more, even outdoors. Thereās something powerful to me about his forms and materials that is in my blood, and I know not a lot of other people want them. Iāll take them happily, and be connected to him and his artwork and his parental guidance around art and science for the rest of my life and hopefully the end of my genetic line.
platypusandpibble@reddit
Nope! My Dadās house is mainly full of things w/o any monetary value. Heās got lots of *stuff* that will have to be disposed of. (There may be a few cool books left, but I already grabbed the ones I want.)
I am estranged from my mother. If she kept me and my sister in the will, Iāll be grabbing the jewelry. Everything else will be sold.
Neither my sister nor I are sentimental at all. We also have no kids, so any inherited items really have nowhere else to go.
Vanth_in_Furs@reddit
Good lort, I donāt want much. There are some records, a small amount of jewelry, and a few sculptures (my parents were artists)ā¦ but no. I donāt want their stuff of the EIGHT PEOPLEās stuff that filtered down to them and theyāve just kept it all in storage. My mom is trying to clean stuff out but itās going slow and I will have to dump multiple properties full of old things, as I live halfway across the country and already have too much in my own house!
Significant-Walrus94@reddit
I'm a very sentimental person and have lots of stuff of my mother's and my two grannies. We also recently inherited my MIL's heavy carved wooden sitting room set. But none of it is my taste. Luckily I have a very big house in a very small town so I have space for everything. I guess I keep everything for the memories they invoke.
The one thing that really bugs me is my mom's Royal Albert tea set. I think it's so ugly. Covered in little blue flowers and I'll never use it. Even my mom never used it more than a handful of times. I could get some much needed money for it, but the thing is - my dad bought it for her. My heart could never let it go.
We don't have kids and none of the nieces or nephews will have space for any of the stuff and it's definitely not their taste. They also don't have any precious memories related to it the way I do. But the idea of it going to strangers is also awful. It's a dilemma.
JaBe68@reddit
Someone is scouring the internet looking for a tea set in that pattern. And they are prepared to part with the purchase price and shipping costs. This means that it will be going to a home where it is well loved. So don't think of them as random strangers, but rather as adoptive parents for the tea set.
Significant-Walrus94@reddit
I love this take on it - thank you. Gives me something to think about. I definitely want it to be loved and appreciated.
dudeatwork77@reddit
Preferably their liquid assets. Not that I needed it but I like that it doesnāt take any space or effort to manage.
Pypsy143@reddit
My mom is a collector of knickknacks of every type - spoons, figurines, teapots, you name it.
I am an avowed minimalist. I love my mom dearly, but there is no way all that stuff is coming to my house.
Her style is very formal and traditional. Mine is very rustic and natural, so I donāt really want her furniture either.
I may keep one or two small sentimental items, but Iām ok selling the rest when the time comes.
Taranchulla@reddit
My mom has my grandmas ring and the beautiful Easter eggs she and my grandma and aunt made long ago. Thereās also a big, decorative iron plant stand that I want.
Princess_Jade1974@reddit
When my parent first drew up a will they asked what I wanted. They gave me the items any way because they were moving house. The one thing they had that I wanted of any kind of sentimental value was their first set of wedding rings.
seaburno@reddit
After my dad passed 7 years ago, my mom started planning to move into an independent living facility and downsized from \~4500 sf to \~1000 sf. We got a lot of stuff - mostly high quality stuff that we used to replace what we already had. For example, a new to us custom hardwood kitchen table. I also inherited a bunch of family heirlooms, like my great-great grandfathers Civil War diary, my grandfathers watch, and other similar sentimental stuff. When mom finally passes (sheās 81 going on 40), there are a few more items that I want, like her cast iron pans she inherited from her grandmother.
My MILās stuff, howeverā¦. Thatās going to take a year or more to shovel out of.
PDXisadumpsterfire@reddit
I see you!
I hope my 80 yo mama lives forever, but if she doesnāt, Iāll be making very hard choices about which family heirlooms will make the 3000 mile cross-country trip. Our house is less than half the size of mamaās and already full, so pretty much anything that comes into our place means something else will need to exit. Some decisions will be easy, like replacing spouseās IKEA bookcases and my 30 yo secondhand rough hewn bookcases with 1940s barrister bookcases. Others will not be.
Kennesaw79@reddit
My mom passed 6 years ago. I kept the outfit that she wore daily - a sweatshirt and sweatpants I washed each night in her final weeks. I also kept her family china, and a few journals (she had beautiful penmanship).
As for my dad, he mainly just has computers - he builds and customize them. I'd probably keep some clothes.
Illustrious_Study_30@reddit
I haven't seen them for eleven years..I don't want anything, not even an apology. What I'd really like is for them to leave me alone.
My parents are aggressive, probably narcissistic and very controlling. I've long come to terms with the fact that I'm just not what they wanted in a child so I'm at the point where I don't even consider them to be my family so I don't want any of their stuff. They're loaded, they've made it clear to family members who toe the line that they will get the inheritance, so in a few years my sister and her kids will be extraordinarily wealthy . The thing is they've had to be belittled, bullied and gaslit to have it. I know who I'd rather be
WoundedBird84@reddit
My mom has an original photograph of the Witch House in Beverly Hills. I want.
Angelworks42@reddit
My dad had a Subaru wrx with the Recardo seats - I wouldn't mind having it.
repowers@reddit
So very little.
Iām living overseas, for starters; but even before that, we were in apartments without a lot of room to spare.
So Iāll pick out one or two of Dadās small tools; Iāll take the family photos as Iāve long been the family history keeper; my sisters can have their pick; and after that? Estate sale. I have no room for antique clocks or fine china or 80s kitchen furnishings or 7 tons of Christmas decorations.
repowers@reddit
So very little.
Iām living overseas, for starters; but even before that, we were in apartments without a lot of room to spare.
So Iāll pick out one or two of Dadās small tools; Iāll take the family photos as Iāve long been the family history keeper; my sisters can have their pick; and after that? Estate sale. I have no room for antique clocks or fine china or 80s kitchen furnishings or 7 tons of Christmas decorations.
Sorry-Government920@reddit
My parents have both passed. I have my Dad's watch and A cast iron skillet I've had for 40 years that I've had since I moved out and she gave it to me
Astronaut6735@reddit
I can't really think of anything. I'm not very sentimental when it comes to physical things.Ā
throwthecupcakeaway@reddit
Both my parents are on their way out. My sisters and I have already talked about what we want. A fob watch from my great great grandfather for me, my younger sister wants a mantle clock, and my older sister is taking the hills hoist clothesline!
Hateithere4abit@reddit
Got my momās 2 Le Crueset covered pots and 2 antique cast iron frying pans, but just to hear her laugh again, ā¦she was a strong stubborn inspiration to me and I still hear her in the way I say things..
mr_mxyzptlk21@reddit
My mother collected Breyer Horses. I kept one, my brother kept one, the rest we parsed out to her crazy-horse lady friends, and sold a few of the more collectible ones.
Dad never was a "thing" person, and tossed even things we gave to him so deleting his items left behind was easy, unfortunately.
FairBaker315@reddit
I'd like to have the ceramic nativity set my mom made in the 70's. That along with the pot bellied stove cookie jar that belonged to my great grandma and the shadow box that has the flag from my dads coffin and his other military items in it would be about it.
I'll probably also keep her box of photos only because I'd feel bad throwing them out.
Thankfully, she cleaned out the house and sold it after dad died a few years ago.
MLAheading@reddit
I love my motherās shadow box and always have. She has a small whistle collection in it that Iāve been obsessed with since I was small.
paulrin@reddit
Mum and dad still alive (\~78?). Dad has always been an avid Coin Collector. I am not sure I care, except to keep his passion alive. Iāll probably do it, just to respect him.
foureyedgrrl@reddit
Is it the Anchor Hawking Boopie Bubble ashtray?
StingLikaBumblebee20@reddit
Nicely done! I bet it is. Grandparents had those.
average_texas_guy@reddit
Those feelings like pretend words.
DaddyOhMy@reddit
My dad had an armoire that was part of the bedroom set my parents got sometime in the 60s. I thought it was so cool when I was a kid and always thought of it as inseparable from him. After he passed away and my mom sold the house, I had to convince her that it was worth it to me to pay for someone to move it to my apartment. She isn't very sentimental and considered it to be worthless as it looked like it had been used for 60 years. Even so, that was part of the charm to me. I had to have it. It's in my bedroom and I'm looking at it as I write this.
It is solid wood and I'm sure it is worth a hell of a lot more than it cost to move it. The monetary value is meaningless to me.
RazorRadick@reddit
At this point Iām convinced the only place to get quality furniture any more is estate sales.
Hateithere4abit@reddit
Sshhhh!!
CanadianExiled@reddit
My mom still has the bedroom set she got with my dad in 1982. I want the armoire as well because it was my dad's. I've told her repeatedly that if she ever gets a new bedroom set I will pay anything to get that armoire to me.
DaddyOhMy@reddit
The funny part is that she kept the bed and dresser (which she used) from the set when she moved. So it's not like she thought the furniture was not worth keeping. I think it was more about how impractical it would be for me to take it and she didn't need it so why bother keeping it. I'm very glad I was able to convince her otherwise.
jvholt75@reddit
Mom passed in 2021. Currently caring for dad . I have a couple things that were mom's. Whatever is left when dad is gone will probably end up in the trash
svzurich@reddit
Technically I have it, my dad's old Laz-E-Boy chair. He left it to me when he died. But it is in Louisiana and I ain't. I should arraigne shipping, but have no space for it. It's likely up in the attic back there.
BadWolf7426@reddit
I'm pretty much ok with selling everything. Except a tall (7ft) wooden file cabinet. 4 big drawers, file sized. 6 small drawers that look like they'd hold card catalog cards, a display case on top, and a small cupboard at the bottom. I remember it being in my grandmother's kitchen and have always loved it.
megalomart619@reddit
Just say no and get her to hire people to help her sort and box it up. My in-laws have so much that I makes me vomit thinking about it when they die. They say they get it, but they donāt move enough shit out to get it.
zatsnotmyname@reddit
We ended up taking the stuff that she had bought just a few years ago when we helped her move & set up her apt. It was nice, b/c we repurposed my kids' old play room into my wife's lady cave, and moved in my mom's barely used couch, recliner & tv.
But yeah, we hired my daughter & her friends to just go through my mom's things and donate or pitch most of them.
My wife wanted to keep my mom's glass paperweight collection. Paperweights, in this day and age? Ok, I guess....
UKophile@reddit
The paperweights can be surprisingly valuable. Like, thousands.
BuckyGoldman@reddit
The only thing I've claimed is a very old smoking stand. It was my grandfather's. Neither my brother or I want the china or silver, but I will probably pick through some cooking pots and pans. My sister-in-law will probably do a big ebay sale and I just hope they are somewhat fair with the profits.
jupitergal23@reddit
I would take the silver, if it's actual silver, then wait for silver prices to spike and melt that shit down, heh
AcesAnd08s@reddit
There is literally nothing in my parentsā house I would ever want, and theyāve spent 50 years cramming it full of āstuff.ā
KOVID9tine@reddit
This group makes me feel slightly better about my family and myself. I thought we were the outsiders as everyone had perfect lives, but it sounds like abnormal families are the normā¦
Pics and sentimental items are what I want, but Iāll take anything of value tooā¦ My dad had some very nice cameras and lens that I gathered up and kept some, sold most. My mom is 86 and has a piano and pipe organ I wouldnāt mind having. She also was the keeper of photo albums and the familyās history, from report cards to vacation souvenirs to original tickets to Disneyland. I love going down memory lane, even if it makes me cry sometimes!
brassmagifyingglass@reddit
I didn't want anything really either. I kept her favourite pale pink hair scarf. It makes me happy.
I don't know of a red cylinder looking ashtray though. Both my parents smoked like champs, dang everyone smoked in those days.
moxiemoon@reddit
The only thing my dad has of theirs with any value is my momās Dooney collection. I got a couple when she passed but Iād like to eventually have and clean up the rest of them (a few got a bit dusty). Otherwise the other valuable thing is the photo collection and she gave me those years ago.
Eschatonic242@reddit
My mom's old electric pizzelle maker, which I think was her mom's at one point.
activelyresting@reddit
There's a few things I'd like to have. Mostly vintage kitchen stuff. I 100% would want my dad's tools. But nothing I'd feel is worth arguing with my sister over, and she'll be swooping in to claim anything good within minutes, so, whatever. My mum has a serious hoarding issue anyway so it would be a crazy amount of work to clear out all the junk just to find the few nice things.
Glad-Sector-2870@reddit
I want the pictures, the photo albums; thatās the only thing I want/miss.
IfuDidntCome2Party@reddit
Thats all I wanted. I scanned all the old longtim favorite photos at high resolution and gave family back the originals. I scanned photos that were in family homes forever, that we grew up on. My sister was shocked I didn't want the original photos. I printed out my scanned version that I cleaned up and they all agreed, it was better than the original. I have them on back up drives and gave them copies of the files. I prefer not having photo prints, since I am a minimalist to a certain extent. I have digital photo frames to display current photos.
NotLucasDavenport@reddit
I inherited two antique chests from my grandparents, one from each side of the family. I really love them and that is about the right amount of āstuffā for me. Iāll keep one or two memorable pieces from each parent and call it a day.
Raccoon_Ascendant@reddit
I want my moms wooden bowls and cast iron pans. That's all.
darthsteveious@reddit
When my dad passed, he had already quit smoking, but still had a ton of old pipes he smoked off and on thru the 70s and 80s. I have them displayed in a nice rack
OpheliaMorningwood@reddit
Thereās an antique chair that was my grandmothers made of Brazilian mahogany thatās Iād like.
DowntownSurvey6568@reddit
My mom has (had?) a handmade rocking chair and bookcase I loved. We have a volatile relationship so I doubt Iāll be invited to the funeral and much less get anything. My sisterās ex husband stole her jewelry a few years back. She has a solid collection of spices we used in highschool but Iāll pass on those!
runjeanmc@reddit
The spices š¤£ If she's lacking '96 vintage oregano, my mom's got her covered.
Commies-Fan@reddit
No. Nothing. The only thing my Mom left me & my sister when she passed last year was money because she knew it was coming. She liquidated everything. I was pissed she didnt tell us she knew but I get it.
My Dad left a house full of shit because he was a narcissist that had no concept of mortality. He was going to live forever. All he did was leave a giant fucking mess. Worthless abusive fuck. I actually smiled when he gritted his gums at me before he passed. And I smile throwing his life in the trash now.
PowerNinja5000@reddit
My mom died in 2024 and I emptied her place. Gave a third away, put another third in the common room in the apartment building, and junked the rest. I kept her dishes because I needed new ones, and a couple paintings/prints.
CanadianExiled@reddit
My dad passed away in 2017, only thing I have of his is his fishing gear which I use once per year at the lake he went to every year since I was a child.
ApartAd3290@reddit
I think I know the kind of ashtray you are talking about.
Nah, I donāt want anything from either of my parents. Iām 49, they are 72 and 84. Havenāt been to my momās house in nearly 20 years, my dadās going into assisted living. I have no sentimental attachment to anything of theirās. I sāpose I would like my momās butterfly ring, but my sisters probably want it more.
JennaDK@reddit
I got my moms pictures and jewelry but what I really wanted was her cookbook with all the stained pages from spilling food all over it when she was teaching me to cook. You know, the red Betty Crocker one.
NoTomorrowNo@reddit
There s a similar book at my mums, who I m estranged from. It was my grandmother s, isn t even written in a language I speak. But my grandfather remade the cover because it was falling apart, it has my grandmither s writing next to all the recipes she used to tweak measurments.And it s just many of the nice family traditions we had thanks to that grandmother in a book. It dates from very early 20th century and has recipe lines like "grate your bloc of sugar".
It s the one thing I m sour about. Can t ask for it, they d destroy it out of mind numbingly stupid spite.
MienaLovesCats@reddit
My mom's china set š„ It is one of the only things she kept from her marriage with my dad. She added to it when she married my stepdad. My dad passed away last year. I already have lots of artwork that my mom did; when married to my dad and single. It is mostly pen and ink; black on white; my favorite art šØ
Ghee-Buttersnaps-@reddit
Both my parents are gone. I have one of my dadās undershirts (itās a white tee) and the cards and letters I had sent him over the years. I have my momās perfume, her family photos, and her jewelry (mostly costume, little value). I didnāt want anything else. I donāt even want a lot of the stuff I own. Iām constantly trying to pare down, so my son doesnāt have to get rid of it when I go.
affemannen@reddit
Im GenX and i already got my parents death cleaning..
They put all their valuable antiques up for auction including jewelry. They got a good amount of money for it and now it's all sitting in a savings account or fund.
Im visiting every summer and every time i am there we manage to throw out some more boxes, only a little left now and things my mom want to have around, like extra bed linens and such. But most of the porcelain sets and glasses have been sold or given away.
There is not really a market for porcelain if it's not older than at least 200+ years and specific makers.
Only thing i ever wanted was some of my grandfathers tools and those he managed to give to me before he passed.
So hopefully when the day i am hoping never comes it will be fast and easy removing the last of the things and selling the house.
Zadyria_Gelm@reddit
My Dad was stationed in Thailand during the Vietnam war. I want them things he sent Mom as gifts. Some I already have because he was going to toss everything when we lost Mom (he was so very lost and waffled between making a shrine or complete emptiness). I kept far too many of Mom's things and have been whittling down as I can bring myself to do so. My Papaw, I kept a yellow cigar box and a rock he named "John Tom". Mamaw, it was the cast iron decorations she hung in the kitchen. Poppy, I have a few things he created with his own hands for me, I didn't need anything else. Grammy, all I want is the cuckoo clock Dad mailed her from Thailand (he loved her as another mother, always), and a decorative tile from her kitchen - but my aunt is in charge, and we haven't been allowed in the house (lost Grammy in March).
PompousAssistant@reddit
My father was in āNam, my parents exchanged letters. Iām hoping theyāre still around for one of us to hold onto.
kittydeviance@reddit
very depressing to think of always 'cause i'll die without my mom around šæ I do want the photo albums she has...every single one...my sister take them and I will personally hunt her down for them...I dunno what else since I honestly not been there to her home in years due to me becoming physically disabled and not able to walk up stairs...I sure there's other stuff...I'll ask my friend to go in there and use cell phone video talking to walk me through the place where I'll go "grab that and that"
Jcaseykcsee@reddit
I know I canāt really think about it, despite it being inevitable for all of us to go eventually. I hate the thought, and I hate that weāre the age when it happens. I know itās part of life.
UpstartCrow88@reddit
I want none of it and they refuse to understand that. I am having the biggest bonfire when my mother dies.
shatterly@reddit
I am currently at my momās visiting for Motherās Day. She has an insane amount of stuff, keeps accumulating more, and jokes āthis will all be yours someday.ā I can count on both hands the things I actually want.
IRingTwyce@reddit
There's quite a bit that I'm keeping. I'll be living in the house for some time, until I decide whether to sell it or rent it out. There's some furniture I am keeping. Some stuff I will distribute to my sister, once her POS felon husband dies. But the main thing I am happy to keep is the 150 year old grandfather clock.
Newsman1977@reddit
There are some things I really want, the things I know meant a lot to my mother and father. For me, itās a way to honor them and keep their memories alive. Most of the things have little to know monetary value. Just sentimental.
What my siblings and I donāt want can be donated to help whoever needs it.
While I donāt want my house cluttered with random things, pieces that hold memories are never in the way.
beakermonkey@reddit
My grandma had a green glass ashtray and Iāll be damned if it didnāt just pop into my head the second I read about your momās red ashtray. They are big clunkers that pull the light in. I havenāt smoked in a long time, but yes, wish I had that green one as much as youāve said youād like your momās.
Have lost a few relatives in the past couple of years. I did want a few things that belonged to them. I received some old furniture that Iāve always loved, some jewelry thatās largely sentimental in value, and art made by my non famous amateur artist great grandfather, and finally my grandmotherās wedding band. Again, nothing inherently valuable, but definitely things that remind me of happy times with them. The rest, is just stuff.
AlwaysTheNewb@reddit
I only want their s70s era silver coffee percolator that was at every family event and campsite I went to in the 80-90s. My siblings can have the rest.
newhappyrainbow@reddit
My parents are pretty minimalist. They have some nice art pieces that Iād like. They have nice furniture but I donāt think Iād keep any of it.
OkConsideration8964@reddit
I wanted the display case with my dad's military medals, which I did get. I also got a piece of tank shrapnel that almost killed him and a bronze pen/pencil holder with his initials that he had before I was even born. I wanted nothing from my mother. She was the meanest, nastiest, most abusive person I've ever known. My siblings and I had no contact with her for years.
chillaxtion@reddit
I have my dads work ID and his watch. Iāve got my momās car and her Warring coffee grinder.
I really donāt want any stuff.
Iāve got to say my mom is going hard, like itās so difficult now. I mostly just want it to be over. Itās really like all the time now. Itās changed things.
ScienceWasLove@reddit
My dad has 2 safes full of guns and a pole barn full of tools.
Thatwasunpleasant@reddit
My mom has some family pictures from the late 1800ās that I would like to make sure are saved and labeled, a huge Victorian secretary deal with glass front shelves on the top half that I wanted as a kid. Now I look at moving it across the state and say itās just not worth it. Itās scratched to heck and probably has cat pee. I donāt think she has anything especially sentimental or valuable to pass on and thatās okay. She gave me her great auntās China that I always adored. Iāve tested it for lead and now itās ornamental unfortunately.
anironicfigure@reddit
when my dad died, I wanted just a few things: the slides of vacation photos he took throughout my childhood, a personalized cowboy shirt I had made for him for a birthday, and the stereo receiver he brought home from serving in Vietnam.
my mom has done a good job of divesting herself of most superfluous possessions, and has already given me a bunch of stuff (amazing 1960s glassware, high quality pots and pans, my grandmothers' serveware). pretty much all I want at this point is a few pieces of artwork she's collected over the decades, a few old photo albums, and some cookware (Le Creuset, Dansk, and cast iron).
my dad made a beautiful dining table a few decades ago, and my mom has some gorgeous furniture, but I'd need to build an addition onto my house if I held onto it. which I am considering--seriously! if I do, I'd also take my grandmother's dressing table, which is maple and probably 1930s, although it's sleek like mid-century furniture. my parents had great taste and IMO old stuff is better than new, but I also actually use all the stuff I have. no reason to hang onto stuff just because it belonged to family.
silverladder@reddit
RE: Items brought back from Vietnam ā My dad was over there in ā65-ā66. He passed away almost 3 years ago. I am grateful to have the Zippo he bought and had engraved over there.
anironicfigure@reddit
oh, that's amazing!!! RIP to your dad. glad he made it home from serving to pass along his Zippo to you.
my dad was a B-52 pilot stationed in Okinawa in the mid/late 60s. I was born at Altus AFB in 1969. he took great care of his Pioneer receiver, and I am proud to have it today. unfortunately, the speakers are long gone.
I also have his collection of 45s--almost forgot! I have several thousand albums, and the receiver is used almost daily.
silverladder@reddit
Vintage Pioneer receivers are great. Thatās an excellent item to inherit.
Also, like you, I inherited vinyl as well. Thereās some good stuff in there like an OG mono copy of The Beatlesā āRevolver.ā
anironicfigure@reddit
ah that's great! my dad's collection is just beat up 45s, but he put his address on em when he took them to sock hops, and it's fun to trace him around south Louisiana over to Texas and up to Oklahoma.
whoever inherits my LP collection is gonna be pleased--lots of rarities in there.
Dry-Improvement-3543@reddit
When I was in Iraq in ā05, we had a CW5 in our Brigade who had that same combat patch from his tour in Vietnam Nam
silverladder@reddit
Thatās cool. Were you/was he a combat engineer at some point?
silverladder@reddit
freakdageek@reddit
Thatās pretty incredible. Lucky to have that. (Admittedly old-school of me, but every man should own a pocket knife and a Zippo)
Gloomy_Narwhal_4833@reddit
My parents dont have any stuff. I got all I need from the in the form of anxiety, depression and inevitable dementia!
sravll@reddit
Photos
Beruthiel999@reddit
My father has a pretty specatular book collection, including some Beat Generation 1st editions and framed original poetry broadsheets that I know are worth thousands.
anironicfigure@reddit
wow, that's amazing!!!
Beruthiel999@reddit
The advice I would give to anyone whose parents have a lot of physical media like books, comics, records, etc is, don't assume they're worthless and pitch them. Do your research. That pile of dusty old books from the 50s MIGHT have some things in it that some collectors would cherish and pay thousands for.
anironicfigure@reddit
oh for certain! I worked in comic book and record shops as a teenager and young adult, and I still peruse resale piles wherever I go.
I recently told my mom, should I predecease her, to not just give away my record collection (everything from blues to free jazz to hardcore to rap) or my books (lots of small-run art books) bc they're worth good money. although you actually have to sell them, and you won't ever get what they're "worth."
I have a lot of signed books that don't have a lot of monetary value yet--Harry Crews, for example--but likely one day.
Radman001@reddit
Anyone else dealing with your parents who got silverware and thought passing it down to the next generation was going to provide them with a generous gift? How can you tell them you don't want it and it's not worth much of anything today?
minicpst@reddit
My ex ended up with three sets of China and a full set plus of silverware.
He uses it for Christmas and Thanksgiving.
My kids donāt want any of it, and we all laugh about it.
Jcaseykcsee@reddit
Iād like their photos, my mom has a beautiful dish collection (fiesta ware, other stuff). Maybe some nostalgic stuff. They have some nice antiques but I have no room for that kind of stuff. I hope i donāt have to think about it for a while.
Bomber_Haskell@reddit
Likely not. I haven't been in their house in twenty years. She's a hoarder so even if I do, when they pass and I have to go through it all I will probably be so fed up that I'll probably toss it all
JoyDVeeve@reddit
My father died in 1997 and I have one of his suits (it's an amazing denim leisure suit from the 70s), a turquoise ring he picked up on one of the non family vacations he went on, and a couple of sweaters that I don't have anymore.
My mother died in 2023 and the only thing I asked for was a particular gift I gave her 20 years earlier. There was one other thing I would have loved to have but I was afraid to ask because if it didn't exist at that time I'd be upset.
twoturntablesanda@reddit
Probably just my dad's pocket knife and watch, which were both gifts from me.
mscrybaby-mo@reddit
I got salt and pepper shakers from my mom, a couple of pictures and nick nacks that the other family didn't want. When I go I figure my kids will toss it all because they don't really care much about it.
baycenters@reddit
I was in my dad's car shop over Christmas and saw that he has our old neighbor's anvil on the same oak stump it was always on. This neighbor was born in 1893.
Bo-C-Fus@reddit
snakeayez@reddit
If it comes to that, I'd have to spend a week going thru all the rooms, attic and basement because I don't know she kept and got rid of. My brother still lives there. House has been in the family over 125 years.
Unique-Fan-3042@reddit
Yes. Mine has a lot of cool artworkānot super valuable, mostly prints, and all of her dishes and silver I would love to have. Photos, family heirlooms, and certain practical things that just arenāt made like they used to be. Like a tool for chopping nuts and one of those spritz cookie press things. Quilts she and my grandmother made, too.
Suitable_Ad7478@reddit
Iām going to have an insurance fire
Practical-Plenty907@reddit
I want nothing of my parents but my aunts and uncles and parents were the same with the grandparents and us grandkids definitely wanted a thing or two from our grandparents. Itās possible my siblings and I will see it all as junk, whereas our kids will see treasures. Time will tell. I would be sure you ask all family and friends if they want anything. Depending on the relationship and personality of each person, they may see it differently.
Pretend_Piano_6134@reddit
Not gonna lie Iām pretty much glad my parents died with nothing to their name. All I got from my dad was some of his important papers and all I got from my mom was a watch and some of her ashes. It was nice not to have to fight over stuff
PompousAssistant@reddit
There are a few items from the kitchen that Iād treasure, because thatās where most of my favorite memories with my mom were made. Recipe cards, a couple of cookbooks, the sugar jar, maybe a few others.
I do have my grandmotherās cookbook that she bought when she took my mother shopping for a cookbook when she married my father. They got the same one, & after my grandmother passed, mom made sure it came to me.
NightMgr@reddit
Some of it is priceless. Some is less than a hassle to dispose of.
SushiGirlRC@reddit
If I had room there are things I'd want, but I don't have room. There is a huge collection of Fenton glass & several other things that could be sold.
makorancheros@reddit
Not one. Single. Thing.
Spickernell@reddit
growing up, we had a red plastic cup on the kitchen counter my whole childhood. it contained, screws, nuts, rubber bands, paper clips, etc. when my dad died and my mom sold the house, she asked me if i wanted anything. only thing i could think of was the red cup. she laughed and said that it was the first thing she threw away. later, she gave me her wedding ring before she died. she was nuts, but i miss her every day.
hapster85@reddit
Off the top of my head, I cannot think of anything they have that I have any particular sentimental attachment to.
MisterSandKing@reddit
My parents are both gone, and I got nothing except memories, and my dadās 51 Plymouth. Neither of them had much.
JurisUrsus@reddit
I want some old furniture and other household items which have been in the family for a while. Some books will be kept as well.
bauer8765@reddit
Iām currently dealing with cleaning out my dads house, he still lives there but needs to go into a care home. Mom has been gone 6 years now. Going through some cookbooks and found a very special and sentimental recipe my mom used to make. Sometimes you find gifts.
csx2112@reddit
Before my dad passed he said he wanted me to have his guitars and records. My mom decided to give my brother in law one of the two guitars and she gave me a fraction of his records, just the ones she didn't like. Not the only reason I disowned them all of course, but sure helped the decision. Brother in law is an arrogant prick BTW
StrangerStrangeland1@reddit
I am 51. Father has passed a couple of years ago, mom is knocking on that door.
I find myself wanting nothing. Nothing for myself, nothing for the kids. I tell myself it's minimalism and trying to content in my own space, but I wonder if it's depression bordering on nihilism. Probably should talk to somebody about it.
Really though, just, everyone has so much stuff! Money for stuff, money to keep stuff, money to fix stuff, places to put stuff, stuff that needs to be put where that other stuff is, what did I do with that stuff? It's a lot, and me, personally, it's a burden I do not want.
pemart22@reddit
My mom has a violin that was owned by my great-great grandfather. Thatās all I want from her. My dad has a collection of letters that were exchanged between my grandparents during WW2 as well as his uniform- those are pretty much all I want from him.
landarc70@reddit
All I want from my mom is this really cool old school ice cream scoop. Grew up with it. It my precious. Haha
Appropriate-Idea5281@reddit
When my dad died all I wanted was his coffee mug
ChickenOSea@reddit
My mum and dad both died last year. Mum used to collect these Nao ceramic figurine things. She had one that was āmeā and one that was my sister. I really donāt have an interest in them but I took the one that was āmeā out of all her stuff. Anyway, Iām an Aussie but live Chicago. So when I was packing my stuff to go back to Chicago after the funeral, I accidentally dropped the āmeā figurine on my foot. My foot swelled up, went black and bruised for 3 months. Now that foot makes a clicky sound when I walk. Now I have a noisy foot that reminds me of my mother.
GeoHog713@reddit
Also a 79 kid.
I don't want much of my parents' stuff. Fortunately, my mother has realized that these things arent worth holding on to, and is making an effort to de-crap the house, now.
My grandpa just passed, at 100. He lived in the same house for more than 60 years. She had to deal with all that junk, and decided to be proactive.
TwistinInTheWind@reddit
Lol, my mom calls it "decrapifying" the house.
wisemonkey101@reddit
Almost nothing. A few of momās cookbooks. And she knows I want them. She watches me closely every visit.
Poutiest_Penguin@reddit
My mother has a collection of bird figurines and carvings. When the time comes, Iāll keep some of those. Sheās still alive and kicking at 91 and lived in an apartment in my house.
thonnard42@reddit
Definitely some heirlooms I'd want.
I'm the sentimental type.
Hifi-Cat@reddit
Most everything is going to go. I'll be keeping kitchen stuff, table and chairs. A few personal items.
KickstandSF@reddit
All I wanted from my mom (who passed away first) I got (mostly dining plates and silver). The only thing I wanted from my dad was my grandfatherās gold pocket watch he got, and it turned out he pawned it. His decision, my loss.
jfrankparnell85@reddit
Agree with people commenting about choosing things with special meaning
My aunt was like a mom to me. When she passed, she was living in my grandparentsās house
I couldnāt keep big stuff because we lived 300 miles away
I found a charity that wanted the furniture- and paid movers to pick up and deliver
It felt much better that people would put furniture and dishes to good use
It was hard to sell - but one cousin was due money from the sale - and there was no easy way to rent the house out
cserskine@reddit
My parents are in their 80ās. They have amassed so much stuff that it will take forever to go through. My mom has been collecting baskets for decadesā¦maybe Iāll open up a museum to display them š
lsp2005@reddit
A cake server. I find it really pretty. These colorful cut to clear wine goblets.Ā
Cowboy_Buddha@reddit
Early GenX here, 1965, parents were 40 and 48 when they had me. Dad was gone just before I turned 18, mom 15 years ago. I donāt have a lot from my parents, some coffee cups and a Vitamix blender from my mom, a lot of the family pictures (boxes of them), my dadās glasses are in my top dresser drawer, I have a land platte book my older sister gave to me. One of the most important things to me is a china cabinet thing called a ācloset secretaryā that came to me from our grandma, after my brother passed away early last year.
Other than that, at 60, I need to work on downsizing and having less stuff. I donāt want my older siblingās stuff.
tc_cad@reddit
The only stuff I want from my Mom is some of her high quality gardening tools.
From my Dad Iād take all his tools if only I had the room. I took his table saw, Roubo workbench and the lathe. I took his coin collection as well.
GoodFnHam@reddit
Yes, the money.
ThrowItAway1218@reddit
Wow...
I'd give the money back just to have my mom back. I don't want any of it, I want her.
Despises_the_dishes@reddit
All my dadās bikes and the collectors ones in storage.
I want my momās jewelry.
My siblings and I can fight over the house.
ThrowItAway1218@reddit
When my mom passed away, I kept her electronics and her kites, as well as some other things. Her kites remind me of her, it's something I can look at or use on days I am longing to be close to her.
TwistinInTheWind@reddit
My mom has a ton of antiques from furniture to hairpins. 95% of them were made or owned by past generations within the family. I've grown up with them and find them beautiful and a connection to family I never got to meet. Between my 2 brothers and I, I'm sure most of it will be kept. She was telling me the other day that she wanted to get rid of the Victrola and it's cabinet. I gasped, lol. I had to tell her that I'd like it and to please not. Everything fits in her house, tastefully displayed or put to purpose and she really did just collect family heirloom type items vs collecting to collect.
Clamper5978@reddit
I just want the photo albums
OneRedSent@reddit
I would have kept it all except for the cost of transporting it cross country. I sold it all but it was sad.
CoastRooted@reddit
I have my momās Mason-Pearson hairbrush. They are indestructible. I use it every day. I also have a candy dish I loved looking at as a kid, but thatās pretty much it.
FletchWazzle@reddit
I kept Dads good books, his toys, and his two swords (along with whatever clothes fit). My Mother, it was mostly batteries, toiletries, a chair.
jt2ou@reddit
My father got rid of all my motherās costume jewelry from the 40ās / 50ās / 60ās. I really wanted something from that collection.Ā I have a modern bangle from mom and a watch from dad. I never cared about the rest of whatever they had.Ā
freakdageek@reddit
Donāt care. I love them both deeply, and consider them mentors and friends as well as parents, but Iāve let them know: feel free to spend your retirement. Youāve earned it. Iām not looking for your stuff, I have enough stuff. Just if you could get us a will and power of attorney, thatād be great.
Moist-Sundae-1116@reddit
My father had a photo of a topless Josephine Baker that I told him I wanted. After he died, that photo was gone. Donāt know if he got rid of it, or if his cousins did, but I was crushed. I did take his CDs (mostly blues).
KnightKrawler68@reddit
Photo albums, otherwise nothing. I donāt need anything they have and we have different tastes anyway.
Key-Macaron-9346@reddit
I wish I would have been allowed to select some of my parent's things before my siblings (the vultures) took almost everything.Ā I only have a couple of items from each.Ā
Mostly_Nohohon@reddit
Is this the kind your talking about? I remember these but always saw them in amber. My parents had one... Along with another that was made of some kinda stone or marble. It was orange and you could have killed someone with it because it was so heavy.
laDDDy42@reddit
Ill keep mas jewelry, her traditional dresses and maybe the tv stand since its also from our culture. I fear my step sister and my bro will fight over stupid shit. I dunno it makes me sad to think about because I have watched my in-laws fight over the dumbest stuff.
stilleastofeden@reddit
Probably some of it, but nothing worth going through all of the junk.
ViewfromMyOfcWindow@reddit
The only thing I absolutely wanted when my favorite uncle died was the cast iron ashtray that was present for my entire life. I want nothing from my birthgiver. But I did get the ashtray. š
iAmAmbr@reddit (OP)
Thank you! I'm glad you got that ashtray!
wolfysworld@reddit
Pictures are the only thing that interests me, the rest is just stuff that my siblings can squabble over
Good_With_Tools@reddit
I'm in the same boat. I live across the country, so I'll have to fly in, clean out the place, and leave with whatever I want. I expect I'll be able to fit everything in a single medium cardboard box. The biggest thing is the photos.
Oh, and the Tupperware. There may be some Tupperware that I need to keep.
NetJnkie@reddit
My wife will get some nice jewelry and old glass (she collects it). I'm hoping to get that fully restored gorgeous 1963 Corvette convertible.
And yes, I know that type. I have one that my wife gave me for cigars. As I said, she collects high quality old glass. :)
iAmAmbr@reddit (OP)
I have a set of schnapps glasses from my omi that are different colors. I totally understand your wife's shared fascination!
bloodinthecentrifuge@reddit
Iād like my momās sewing machine. Maybe Iāll finally learn to sew properly after she tried to teach me so many times. Sigh.
iAmAmbr@reddit (OP)
Seeing lots of folks wanting mom's sewing machine! I wish my Omi had the patience to teach my mom and myself how to sew!
livens@reddit
I went through this with my grandparents. My dad had already passed and my mom wasn't involved. I kept a lot of stuff that was useful. I still use a lot of their old pots and pans because honestly they're made better than anything I could buy new today. I have my grandfather's old hand tools... again I keep and use them because most new stuff is junk. Bonney, SK, Proto wrenches and sockets from the 60s and 70s. But they're furniture and knick knacks... straight to the auction for 99% of it. I kept a few sentimental things that I remembered from when I was a kid. I don't think I would be comfortable if I was surrounded by all of their old stuff.
Reader47b@reddit
Mine are both gone. I have a few books from my father. I have a couple of pieces of furniture from my mother, And I have their senior year high school yearbook. (They both went to the same high school, same graduation year, but they started dating in college).
AnUnexpectedUnicorn@reddit
There is one piece of art and some jewelry. My parents have always bought quality furniture - some pieces are from the 70s but they're Ethan Allen and timeless, so I'll probably keep those. Some Christmas decor. That's probably it. They've actually been pretty good at getting rid of stuff.
Typical_Plankton_274@reddit
Not really. Neither of my parents has anything of real value or even significant sentimental value. Old family pictures would probably be it.
Entire-Tomato768@reddit
My parents have a blue ashtray. It's really heavy, like if you throw it at someone, it's doing serious damage to them. It's so thick it's also probably not breaking or shattering.... . I've seen your ashtray, only blue
iAmAmbr@reddit (OP)
Oh! Now I want a blue one too!
jrtski@reddit
I kept some art, a few crystal wine glasses, and momās handwritten book with a lifelong collection of her recipes.
CatBird2023@reddit
1973er here.
My parents first downsized 20 years ago and I only took one thing - a small Danish modern teak end table (my mom has great taste!).
It's just my mom now in a condo, and I don't plan on taking any of her stuff. Maybe one very small thing that reminds me of her, at most?
I live in a small space and I'm a bit of a minimalist because of it. If I bring something in, something else has to go, so I'm selective!
Automatic-House-4011@reddit
My parents had a lot of antique furnishings, etc. that my brother and I didn't want. Let the relatives take what they wanted and left the rest in the house when it sold (new owner happy to take it). Still got a heap of boxes with silverware, dinner sets, etc. that we don't want but haven't decided what to do with yet. Only things I really wanted were dad's tools.
Formal_Plum_2285@reddit
I didnāt want any of my moms stuff. But then she died and things changed.
alwayssearching117@reddit
I feel this statement.
cometshoney@reddit
My mom has a manila envelope full of loose diamonds, so I definitely want that. I do not want her warehouse full of various holiday decorations.
UserQuestions20@reddit
Nothing of my parents or in-laws, I tell them to get rid of that sh**!
ApatheistHeretic@reddit
I kept 3 personal things from mom, and will likely do something similar when Dad goes.
So much of what they had/have is just junk..
ladyrose403@reddit
my parents live in florida. i'll sell the house no problem. i want exactly 2 things, don't know if i can afford to have them shipped or not. my mom has a singer peddle sewing machine from about 1911, and my dad still has his steel pedal car that he used as a child, and i remember being allowed to use as a child.
relikter@reddit
My mom has her grandmother's Singer sewing machine. It was the only thing that followed us across every move and was a constant in my childhood home. I want that. I've told my sister that, and she's OK with me taking it, so I think we're cool on that. There's also an oil lamp from my step dad's parents that I'd like, but I'm going to give my sister first dibs on that since I called dibs on the sewing machine.
One-Pepper-2654@reddit
60 here we are downsizing from a 4 bedroom we raised our kids in to a two bedroom ranch. We just filled our second dumpster to the brim. It was awesome. We are also selling or giving away most of our furniture and practically starting from scratch. We joke that we want the new place to look like a hotel room.