Which British phrase sounds completely fake to non-Brits but is genuinely normal?

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PozzieMozzie@reddit

"im off to see a man about a dog"... I said this to my American friends when they were visiting and i had to go run an errand, they excitedly asked me when i got back if i had got the dog and was it a puppy... They were quite crest fallen when i explained it .. 😂😂

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tobotic@reddit

> off to see a man about a dog This phrase was apparently commonly known in the US [during prohibition era](https://www.worldwidewords.org/qa/qa-see1.htm) and I can find some references to it still being used there today, at least in some parts.

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Evening_Elderberry_9@reddit

I thought this originated in the north east of the UK, where a bottle of newcastle brown ale was known as a bottle of dog. I believe its also printed on their bottles. So it was a polite way of saying "Im off out to the pub" without telling the kids. Wether you actually went to the pub, is another matter.

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tobotic@reddit

Wikipedia claims the inverse of that, with Newcastle Brown becoming known as "dog" as a reference to people already saying "I'm off to see a man about a dog" when they went to the pub. The oldest known usage of it was from an Irish play dated 1866.

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PozzieMozzie@reddit

O really, thats interesting cos i really thought it was a British thing... Thanks for the info.

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kipperfish@reddit

This was always my go too phrase if I was out to pick up some herbal supplies from the local tax-free entrepreneur. "I'm getting weed" does t sound as cool.

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Far-Adhesiveness3763@reddit

I once said to a work colleague that I was off to drop the kids off at the pool, when I returned 5 mins later he was surprised it hadn't taken that long to my children swimming, he was in his 60's too.

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wickedwix@reddit

A couple of weeks ago I saw a few tiktoks from Americans discovering that some British call all dish soap fairy liquid

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zagblorg@reddit

Do they? I've always heard it called washing.up liquid. Genericising brand names is usually more of an American thing!

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Puzzleheaded-Lynx204@reddit

We have plenty, as does every country, I should imagine. Off the top of my head: Fairy liquid / Hoover / Biro / Allen key / Sellotape / Pritt stick

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Oscarwild31@reddit

Don't tell him Pike..

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abfgern_@reddit

Classic examples are "lolipop man/lady" and "zebra crossing"

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darkaluc@reddit

*Toucan crossing looks unimpressed

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Matchaparrot@reddit

*Pelican crossing looks unimpressed

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abfgern_@reddit

Very quietly (to me at least) apparently since 2016 they are phasing out Pelicans to be replaced by Puffins!

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Bad_Combination@reddit

What is a puffin crossing? Or is it just a change in name?

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mattl1698@reddit

it's where the pedestrian go/wait lights are. on a pelican crossing, the lights are mounted up by the traffic lights on the other side of the road. on a puffin crossing, they are next to the button you press to request to cross

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Bad_Combination@reddit

Isn’t a pelican crossing is a zebra crossing with Belisha beacons?

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mattl1698@reddit

zebra crossings can have the flashing beacons. pelican crossings are signal controlled crossings. [source: the highway codes rules for pedestrians on gov.uk](https://www.gov.uk/guidance/the-highway-code/rules-for-pedestrians-1-to-35)

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abfgern_@reddit

The ones where the red/green man are next to you, not accros the road. They also have sensors that detect when you have finished crossing, so no flashing amber lights needed (which seems expensive for little real benefit but that's just me)

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Bad_Combination@reddit

Ugh, I hate those.

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abfgern_@reddit

Same. And way way worse for crowded crossings.

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Greatgrowler@reddit

I think the main difference is that they seem to let traffic flow past and only change for pedestrians when they’ve got fed up with waiting and have crossed already.

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Matchaparrot@reddit

I haven't seen a pelican crossing for years so this makes sense!

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EUskeptik@reddit

They usually fly rather than walk? 🤔 -##-

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rakadiaht@reddit

PEGASUS CROSSING LAUGHS

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abfgern_@reddit

I've never heard of that one. Learnt something new

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Matchaparrot@reddit

It's for horses! 🐎 I saw one once in central London for the horse guards parade to cross

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Matchaparrot@reddit

*Puffin crossing chrotles

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BritishGent_mlady@reddit

Osprey crossing guffaws

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BeefsMcGeefs@reddit

Thanks to my German partner, I’ve learned that German and English share many of the same idioms word for word Apparently “cold as a witches tit” is not one of these

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kendoddsdadsdeaddog@reddit

Scania wheel nuts mate! Or as they’re German is probably Benz or MAN

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djwillis1121@reddit

"I'm going to smoke a fag"

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JuiceNo6186@reddit

Can I bum a fag?

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twinnedwithjim@reddit

I got a warning on Reddit for a similar post to this where I said that 😂

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WordWizardx@reddit

“I could murder a fag” definitely loses something in cross-Atlantic translation

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Marmite50@reddit

Whatever floats your boat mate. As long as they're into it no ones gonna stop you

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Wickey312@reddit

Wouldn't recommend it

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spikewilliams2@reddit

When I was an exchange student in the US my roommate would insist on saying this very loudly while in public.

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Puzzledandhangry@reddit

I got banned from a sub on Reddit for using the word fag. It was taken out of context VERY badly.

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rad00@reddit

https://youtu.be/F6O4oYN3kfU?si=tFHEbDt95dyyR-up

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TH1CCARUS@reddit

Woah woah calm down now

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WeLiveInAnOceanOfGas@reddit

'Face like a slapped arse' has always been a favourite Plus Bob's your flipping as the advanced version of Bob's your uncle

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mailywhale@reddit

I've never heard "I've got the hump" before. "Does the Pope shit in the woods?" might be a good example!

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Jakevans97ss@reddit (OP)

I’ve heard this one but I think the saying is “does a bear shit in the woods”, I’m not sure if the Pope does!

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mailywhale@reddit

Haha no, that's the joke. "Does a bear shit in the woods?" "Is this Pope a Catholic?" are two very well-known sayings, that are combined for humorous effect

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OliLeeLee36@reddit

"We'll burn that bridge when we come to it"

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Worried-Ad-6593@reddit

I can’t believe this needed explaining, it’s hardly rocket surgery.

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mailywhale@reddit

It’s got me foaming at the knees

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pokemebiffinbridge@reddit

At least we're now singing from the same boat.

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yellowsubmarine45@reddit

Also similar, I said to someone ones "The worlds your lobster" and they gently told me it was actually "Oyster" not realising I was referencing the famous scene in Only Fools and Horses.

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madirishpoet@reddit

Does the pope shit in the woods comes from GTA San Andreas

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Passchenhell17@reddit

Reminder that San Andreas was made in Scotland. They had to get the saying from somewhere.

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cloud__19@reddit

GTA San Andreas came out in 2004 and I am old enough to definitively tell you that this phrase predates it by decades.

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mailywhale@reddit

I can assure you that it does not

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vipros42@reddit

I endorse this assurance

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GrumpyOldFart74@reddit

It’s a joke blending of two synonymous phrases: Does a bear shit in the woods? Does the pope wear a silly hat? Goes to “does the pope shit in the woods?” Don’t think that’s specifically British though. Definitely heard Aussies say it (and maybe the odd American too)

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Unseasonal_Jacket@reddit

And I think thats peak confusion as it blends two slang jokes that someone might have neither heard or understood and asks them to go further.

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kevio17@reddit

ORF1Live@reddit

Is a bear catholic?

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spinzzi@reddit

"Is the pope catholic?"

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Live3ish@reddit

"Is the Space Pope reptilian?"

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wondered-bongo@reddit

Bob's your uncle

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JohnnyBravosWankSock@reddit

Fanny's your aunt.

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oblectament@reddit

Who's she? The cat's mother?

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Ok_Coat6580@reddit

Fanny's your mothers sister.

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Western_Ad_5933@reddit

Or even Robert’s your mother’s brother!

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Scared-Insurance2046@reddit

This👆😋

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Scared-Insurance2046@reddit

Couldn’t be bothered to edit 😋

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kylehyde84@reddit

Bob's your teapot. Where did that come from?

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Scared-Insurance2046@reddit

Robert’s your aunties live-in lover

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cyanicpsion@reddit

But wait... Who is this Robert Sherunkle?

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Ochib@reddit

**It's looking a bit black over Bill's mother's** **Going all around the Wrekin** **Wisht as a winnard**

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WordWizardx@reddit

Can confirm, I’m American and I don’t have a clue what any of these are :-D

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shebasmum49@reddit

We say Wilf's mother's in my area.

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Nimbus1202@reddit

I always say black over uncle bills which I got from my dad! Wonder why it’s slightly different?

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Scared-Insurance2046@reddit

Ah old Trafford 😉iykyk

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JEZTURNER@reddit

Midlands much?

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Ochib@reddit

**Just don’t have a gambol into the cut**

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stu3y69@reddit

Alright butt

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Big-Help419@reddit

Gordon Bennett - as an actual way of expressing surprise

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altanader@reddit

How has nobody said “taking the piss”

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dunzdeck@reddit

"In future"

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Duanedoberman@reddit

Use your loaf. Apparently it comes from rhyming slang. Loaf of bread....Head.

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terryjuicelawson@reddit

A surprising number of things are from rhyming slang without people realising.

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WrekTheHead@reddit

Including 'berk', from 'Berkeley Hunt'...

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pokemebiffinbridge@reddit

Ok, armed with this info I am now setting out to bring "berk" back into fashion.

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PrinceBert@reddit

I used to say that as a kid and I'm only just finding out (25 years later) what I was really calling people.

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LoudCar7846@reddit

Would you Adam and Eve it? 🙂

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Fine-State8014@reddit

But not brown bread. Or bread and honey.

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Obvious-Water569@reddit

The fact that: “Alright?” “Alright?” Is a complete and totally acceptable interaction.

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Groffulon@reddit

Not just in English… “Ça va?” “Ça va?” “Oui, Ça va.”

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repair-it@reddit

And Polish - where "No" can mean "Yes" !

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charmstrong70@reddit

Tbf. In English the phrases “yeah, no” and “yes no” are completely acceptable

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dreamsonashelf@reddit

You can even drop the "oui" and it would still sound normal.

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Obvious-Water569@reddit

Bien vu.

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twoseat@reddit

It’s a bit wordy though. Fortunately a discrete upward nod from the first person, with a response of a small downward nod from the second, is functionally equivalent.

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megawoot@reddit

I respond with just "alright". I avoid any intonation that sounds like I'm also asking if they're alright rather than just confirming I'm alright (thanks for asking), to prevent the interaction continuing any longer than necessary

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pinpoint321@reddit

I usually go with “now then” as my go to response to shut this down. If I actually want to get into a deep conversation I will go with “aye not bad. You?” At which point the only response I am expecting is “Aye, not bad”.

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paleblooddaviey@reddit

Fucking hell, it’s like reading a mirror.

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rcgl2@reddit

But not "now then, now then"...

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pinpoint321@reddit

Not anymore.

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Putrid_Form_9223@reddit

Do you like the music of Showaddywaddy

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EvilTaffyapple@reddit

I think Yorkshire has got this one in the bag. “Ey up” No intonation, no expectations. Just a greeting.

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ricky251294@reddit

Too many syllables. It's aight.

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Leucurus@reddit

It's just the modern equivalent of "How do you do?", to which the only acceptable reply was "How do you do?"

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Dumuzzid@reddit

Not to mention: "Hiya!" "Hiya!" Though this is more of an Irish thing.

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Obvious-Water569@reddit

Definitely common in the UK as well.

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JeremyTwiggs@reddit

To master it, “Alright” should almost sound like you’re just clearing your throat.

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thefootster@reddit

I have always used it as my default "hello", usually with a little nod. 95% of the time its all good, but I get taken aback when someone responds with an actual answer to whether they are alright!

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Obvious-Water569@reddit

Oh god, yeah that's a nightmare. "Alright?" "Alright?" "I've been better actually. I lost my job then my dog died." "Shit."

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Savanarola79@reddit

It's why I just say hi or hello and move on rather than alright.

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Savanarola79@reddit

I'm English and have never got the hang of 'alright' 🤷‍♂️

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1Marmalade@reddit

I always disliked it. I’ve still not used it. But I’ve always disliked ‘mate’ too.

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TheGnomeSecretary@reddit

Alright, mate. No need to go on about it.

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Savanarola79@reddit

Same. It's a lazy phrase, pretending you care when you don't. I'd rather people just say hi or hello and move on if they don't want a chat 😆

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tilt@reddit

are you alright / yes I'm alright alright? alright.

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Savanarola79@reddit

Do you not ask the person if they're alright too?

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Zealousideal-Sail893@reddit

Alreet

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lewisluther666@reddit

You're having a bubble

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HumanBeing7396@reddit

You’re having a giraffe

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UniversalJampionshit@reddit

You’re having a Turkish bath

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Leucurus@reddit

You're having a woolly one

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BritishGent_mlady@reddit

You salad

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Bacon4Lyf@reddit

Apparently the slang of peak. It means something bad. But Americans online have adopted it and now use it in the same way to describe something good. I tried saying this the other day and I had so many users trying to convince me I’m on about nonsense and how peak being something bad doesn’t make any sense

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zagblorg@reddit

Surely peak could be good or bad, depending what it's the peak of?

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UniversalJampionshit@reddit

I’m pretty sure I first heard ‘Bob’s your uncle’ from a Madagascar game

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TumbleweedMaterial53@reddit

Arse o er tit

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BoxWonderful5393@reddit

One I use almost daily is "Have a goosey at this".

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repair-it@reddit

Yes, having a gander = to have a look at.

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pajamakitten@reddit

Calling things naff or saying you are chuffed/dead chuffed about something. I had an American colleague telling me about her having to relearn English to understand what we were on about half the time.

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repair-it@reddit

It's because they learn American, which they try to tell everyone else is English.

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3lbFlax@reddit

Proof, if proof be need be.

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repair-it@reddit

Proof of the pudding ....

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NoisyGog@reddit

Proof, if proof needed.

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Savanarola79@reddit

"You're wromg, and you're a grotesquely ugly freak"

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Savanarola79@reddit

.......This is the NEWSSSSSS

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DRUGEND1@reddit

Hello sir!

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Aspect-Unusual@reddit

"Thew an absolute wobbler"

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CharlemagneKidding@reddit

Done up like a kipper

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onionsofwar@reddit

I often catch myself after seeing the confused expressions of my team, who are quite international. - 'Pop to the loo' not as universal as i thought. - 'Space to swing a cat' sounds horrible if you don't know the phrase

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shebasmum49@reddit

Three sheets to the wind - drunk. Tomato short of a salad/ lights are on but no-one's home - not very intelligent Sweating like 1) Glass blower's arse 2) Blind lesbian at a fish market 3) Paedophile at a scout camp.

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Zealousideal-Low3388@reddit

My Argentine ex cracked up every time someone said “lovely jubbly” “¿que significa jubbly?

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GooseyDuckDuck@reddit

I’m in Egypt right now, the beach barman just said lovely jubbly.

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Nkhotak@reddit

The porter at a hotel in Malawi introduced himself as Mr Lovely jubbly.

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JimmyBallocks@reddit

A few years ago in the souk in Marrakesh a guy came up to me and said in one unbroken sentence “hello lovely jubbly are you from Halifax”

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Fine-State8014@reddit

The guys with the fake watches and sunglasses in Majorca used to love saying it.

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DR_95_SuperBolDor@reddit

I found most people in India would say it as soon as they found out you're British. "Ah, English? Lovely jubbly."

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OverPaper3573@reddit

A Jubbly in my youth in Peckham was a sort of tri angular polyhedhron of Orange flavoured Ice lolly.

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OverPaper3573@reddit

https://preview.redd.it/ogt6fv1syo0h1.jpeg?width=391&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=2a58e280ce06dc14e1fa84e2d0f2b732883b5c99

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Djinfin@reddit

Yeah. ‘Cuppa Tea! Lovely jubbly! David Beck Ham!’

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Greatgrowler@reddit

Our one near Malaga said “Cheap as chips” a lot.

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X-actoMundo@reddit

Costa Del Boy

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Alive_Ice7937@reddit

"I got a fake Jamie Oliver doll called Jimmy Olivar. He said things like lovely jubilee and puker" - Adam Buxton

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deadwoodgleaming@reddit

Bob’s your uncle and Fanny’s your aunt.

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GapPerfect5494@reddit

Arse about tit

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shebasmum49@reddit

I've heard arse about face.

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Eddie173312@reddit

I like “if it all goes tits up “

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joe_2slow@reddit

Had to explain the phrase 'the dogs bollocks' to a Brazilian woman. She thought it was hilarious.

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finalcircuit@reddit

Back in the early 90s, there was a really high-end UK mountain bike called the D.O.G.S. B.O.L.X. There was a Blue Peter feature about this increasingly popular pursuit and they invited one of the Mountain Biking UK magazine staff onto the show to give a demonstration. He brought along his D.O.G.S. B.O.L.X. Fortunately it was a white frame so they could just Tippex out the name. Aston Martin also got the builder to make them some D.O.G.S B.O.L.X frames but they applied their own colours and branding. Aston Martin also put the best components possible on them, giving a mid-90s price tag of £3,500.

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eggmayonnaise@reddit

The mutt's nuts.

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ChangingMonkfish@reddit

The Mum of my British friend who moved to California used to wind up her friends by saying “PUT WOOD IN’THOLE LASS, WE DON’T LIVE IN’T BARN”. Meaning “please close the door”.

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Separate_Fun_2850@reddit

Canny

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BritishGent_mlady@reddit

I did a year at Arizona State University back in 2001. There were a few British sayings that got a confused reaction, (many listed below), but the one that got the biggest reaction was: "Got to dash" I was talking to a very lovely American girl, at the wall of post-boxes for the dorms. We were chinwagging about whatever and I looked at my watch and said, "sorry I'd love to keep chinwagging but I've got to dash". She understood perfectly, but I actually heard her knicker elastic loosen when I said it 😄 PS: also, "chinwag"

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Impetuous_doormouse@reddit

"Going arse over tit" - To fall over

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cyanicpsion@reddit

It's a belt and braces approach , which always fails with Americans And they don't really like the 'more than one way to skin a cat'

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SquidgyB@reddit

I know someone who got into trouble with HR for saying aloud "There's enough room to swing a cat in here!" - someone (in the UK mind) took offence to the phrase...

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SalParadise100@reddit

I think I would too. Surely only worthy of comment if there isn’t enough room to swing a cat?

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tetsurose@reddit

Playing DND online with some Americans one asked what time it was and I had to explain when I said purely out of habit time big Ben had little babies

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MrKiplingIsMid@reddit

Queen Anne's dead. In response to something stating the obvious. Probably a bit old-fashioned now, mind.

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bopeepsheep@reddit

We used that for "your petticoat's showing"...

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octoprickle@reddit

Never heard this one and I've heard of all the other ones on this thread.

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WinkyNurdo@reddit

My Mexican ex used to have trouble saying “little toe”. The Spanish translation pretty much means, “little finger of the foot”. And she just couldn’t remember the English for it. So she stubbed her toe and shouted, “Owwweeee my little foot finger!”.

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Harald_TheEnduring@reddit

I shit you not

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WinkyNurdo@reddit

You alright? Alright. Yeah good. You? Yeah good. How are you? Yeah good. Good. Alright. Yeah. Right.

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Own-Ambition-4405@reddit

Do you want to “wet your whistle”?

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yearsofpractice@reddit

I’ve got the hump, so I’m going to smoke a fag

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LoudCar7846@reddit

"a bit of how's your father" - euphemism for sexual activity

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SquidgyB@reddit

"Getting your leg over" as well.

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LN-66@reddit

The drinking ones could have a thread of there own

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pajamakitten@reddit

Young people apparently do not know the first one.

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Bipolar03@reddit

When you see someone cleaning 'is the Queen or summat?' When someone is about to have a bath/shower 'happy birthday.'

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ETBio@reddit

I used to live with a non-Brit who'd lose it every time I said "I'm afraid". Like, have you had time to do xyz? I'm afraid not, no. She'd always laugh and ask me what I was afraid of.

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Extreme_Objective984@reddit

Fuck a duck. As useful as tits on a fish. Gordon Bennet!

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trustmeimabuilder@reddit

I don't want to piss on your chips but...

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Hot_Direction_4120@reddit

The dog's bollocks.

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kylehyde84@reddit

One I the hand is worth two in the bush

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tilt@reddit

I recently got someone very confused for asking them "How's tricks?" They were from London, too!

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CitiumStables@reddit

Are you having a giraffe?

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attilathetwat@reddit

Jog on Sometimes followed up with Cnut

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pervertsage@reddit

"They do that, don't they?" or "They do that, don't they, though?" in a Scouse accent. "Deedoodatdontdedoe?"

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Far-Hospital-9961@reddit

Don’t know him from Adam.

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Dommlid@reddit

Going black over Bills mothers

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WGD23@reddit

Welsh, now in a minute

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Sweaty_Ground1272@reddit

“That’s Pony” Meaning something is not good. Absolutely love it!

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scouse_git@reddit

Sorry

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Ahleanna-D@reddit

You made a pig’s ear of it.

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PagodNaAkoooo@reddit

I'm absolutely gobsmacked. It means you're utterly astonished, and it sounds like a made-up word from a Roald Dahl book.

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Status_Pure@reddit

Aye up ducky/ muckah/ cobber/ shagger/ cunt

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Littleleicesterfoxy@reddit

One that I use that has confused johnny foreigners is “Bob on”

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Chopsticks_Charlie@reddit

'That's mustard' seems to turn some heads

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AutoModerator@reddit

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