Why do Americans (not every American) live with their parents for so long?

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LL8844773@reddit

I feel like Americans are known for moving out quickly? I’d say other cultures live with their parents longer.

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thickjamaicanuncle@reddit

Yeah I was gonna say, Americans are the ones who are more prone to doing shit like making their kids pay rent or kicking them out of the house when they turn 18.

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Hoosier_Jedi@reddit

Don’t feed the kicked out at 18 stereotype. Foreigners are foolish enough to it at face value.

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Ariel_s_Awesome@reddit

It's common enough to be worth talking about. Don’t shut it down just because you're too lucky to deal with it.

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lemonprincess23@reddit

Fairly common where I live. Not the kicked out part, but most of my friends were on their own by 20, I moved out at 17 so it probably depends where you live

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ian9921@reddit

Issue is foreigners take the "kicked out" part literally, and don't realize it's usually actually just moving to college or wanting more space

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CinemaSideBySides@reddit

Not the kicked out part,

That's the distinction. People think American parents literally change all the locks and never see their kids again when they turn 18

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Johnnys-In-America@reddit

I guess it should be "kicked out" in quotes since it's just an idiom.

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MrLongWalk@reddit

The problem is that foreigners take the “kicked out” part extremely literally

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Hoosier_Jedi@reddit

It can be a stereotype AND still happen SOMETIMES.

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Johnnys-In-America@reddit

OK but how much was it frowned upon back in the day, that a grown person who "lived in their mother's basement" was considered a loser.

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These-Ad5332@reddit

It can be a true stereotype that happened often to older generations who made a conscious decision to change that dynamic upon becoming parents.

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OP, as you can see people have strong feelings about this 😂 it’s a bit of a misconception. Why people live with their parents for so long tends to be less about culture and more about finances or other personal circumstances such as childcare, health issues, etc. Housing costs in the US are extremely high.

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ILoveBigCockroaches@reddit

Most move out. I moved out with my current boyfriend at 19 and we're still together more than a year later.

Why some may stay though is because the housing market is horrid. Housing and rent are getting more and more expensive while wages are stagnent. Me and my boyfriend are saving for a house in his country and the houses there are much more affordable with American income.

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qu33nof5pad35@reddit

It’s expensive out here.

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MsSamm@reddit

Rents are expensive, too expensive to live by yourself. Now you need to be able to to show the landlord you make at least twice as much per month as themonthly rent. Plus 1st and last month's rent, security deposit, pet deposit, pet rent.

Never live with your friends because the odds are that they won't remain friends. So you live with strangers. Read the bad roommates sub to see how that often turns out.

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Phoenix_Court@reddit

You know that scene from Spongebob that got turned into a meme? The one where Mr. Krabs looks into the camera and leans into the microphone and says "money".

That's your answer.

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Bluemonogi@reddit

For those who live with their parents as adults they might do so simply because of money. Before they have finished their education and secured a good job it might be very expensive to live on their own.

Some live with their parents because either they or their parent has a health issue and need help.

From what I have seen there are many cultures that expect people to live with their parents and grandparents as adults and give support to the elders for their whole lives. It seems odd to consider Americans living with parents to be doing so forva long time in comparison.

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Successful_Truth4971@reddit

It's so varied, especially in a country this diverse. My WASP parents said the options were college or a job, and if I chose the latter I would pay rent for 6 months and then be out. I chose college (and moved away for that, as many of us do).

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Dianag519@reddit

You must be from a cold country. A lot of Americans push their kids out at 18. It is also something people make fun of here if an adult still lives with their parent. My parents are Cuban immigrants so they think completely different. Most Hispanic countries believe in kids staying in the home a lot longer and even moving in their spouses. Also Indians live together too. I’d say that’s a lot of people. Americans do sometimes live with their parent parents again when they are old and need care but then it’s more like your parents are living in your house.

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GreenBeanTM@reddit

And here we see a classic example of “America is actually the middle ground for everything” from some we move out too early (changing a lot because of the economy) and for others we live at home too long. We’re up tight prudes to some and we’re dirty degenerates to others. We’re overly friendly and too individual.

Pretty much anything someone not from here thinks about us, there’s someone else who thinks the exact opposite.

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jml510@reddit

I'm still in the nest because Bay Area housing costs are astronomical, and I receive near-minimum wage pay. I would love to move back out if I could.

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time-for-jawn@reddit

When you move into a lot of places, you have to pay first and last month’s rent, utilities, parking fees . . . . After you’ve finished university or technical school—school they had to pay for.

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FunJackfruit9128@reddit

I think americans are known for moving out sooner? but the ones who do stay home usually do it to save money, as living alone is very expensive

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thats-gold-jerry@reddit

I don’t think this is true and it’s generally looked down upon. Where did you get this from?

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SteakAndIron@reddit

....huh?

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MacheteTigre@reddit

Compared to who? We have the opposite stereotype, you probably should live with your parents until you're in a financially stable position to move out, and the stereotypically getting kicked out at 18 I view as abhorrent parenting that is nonetheless unfortunately common but thankfully is on the decline

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ApprehensiveWin3020@reddit

Have you seen these housing prices? Where are they supposed to go.

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Danibear285@reddit

Citation needed:

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CountChoculasGhost@reddit

This is very much not a thing.

In fact many people wonder why Americans move out so young (18)

I have no idea where you got this idea.

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Secure-Ad9780@reddit

Americans coddle their children. In the last 15 yrs kids cannot make any decisions without texting first, and dozens of times daily. So they never learn to do anything on their own. Their parents also raise them to never struggle, so they expect the same standard of living as they grew up with even when they're 19.The other reason is that they have no real life friends. Everyone is texting each other or face-timing. So they have no friends who've moved out and work who might rent them a room. Why should they work when mom and dad supply everything they need?

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Ariel_s_Awesome@reddit

Have you been alive in the last 40 years or are you still stuck in The Good Ol Days?

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Detonation@reddit

Probably the typical obnoxious boomer. lol

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aquay@reddit

i got out as soon as i could (18). went to college. if people are staying longer, it's probably because of $$$

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PipelinePlacementz@reddit

My kid moved out at 18. I moved out at 18... I think most Americans do this. Am I wrong? Yeah, there are people who live with their parents into their 20s or in rare cases, their 30s, but this is not at all common. When I lived in Europe, people lived with their parents until marriage in many cases.

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Ariel_s_Awesome@reddit

It's getting more common but that's because young adults are getting poorer.

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Yeegis@reddit

Because a 900 square foot 2 bedroom house in a crappy neighborhood is a million dollars

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Ariel_s_Awesome@reddit

I was paying $1000 a month for a small apartment in the slums. I moved out because the last straw was gaslighting me about yet another dead fridge.

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AssociationWaste1336@reddit

Everything else I’ve heard from non Americans says the opposite. Americans seem to be one of the few that leave as soon as they’re 18

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Ariel_s_Awesome@reddit

Everything else you've heard from Americans says the opposite too.

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shelwood46@reddit

I try to bring the stats down by having left when I turned 17 (which is when I started college).

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Ariel_s_Awesome@reddit

Eh? Who did you hear that from? Because Americans are pretty fixated on the nuclear family household.

We are getting poorer though while the rich get richer. Housing prices are soaring. College students are practically required to start their lives with a mountain of debt. Breaking into fields without an (often unnecessary) degree is difficult.

So, uh, yeah, the concept of a nuclear family household isn’t working out in reality. And there's still a strong stigma about adult children who can't live up to it.

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Current_Poster@reddit

This is funny. We just had a post asking us why we shove our 18 year olds out on the street, and that everyone else has 'family living with family'. We can't win!

If we could form a consensus as to whether our young people are lazy and unambitious or whether we're heartless Dickensian figures shoving kids out on the street before the last note of "Happy Birthday" is sung, that would be super helpful.

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nebraskajone@reddit

Now we're living with their parents too long lol

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TsundereLoliDragon@reddit

Should move out when we're 15 I guess.

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Technical-Prize-4840@reddit

No matter what Americans do, we are weird or wrong.

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TsundereLoliDragon@reddit

It's crazy how we simultaneously do both too little and too much of literally everything.

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TsundereLoliDragon@reddit

I thought we were all kicked out at 18.

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Regular_Efficiency61@reddit

Literally what are you talking about

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gigisnappooh@reddit

I moved out at 18.

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Top-Web3806@reddit

Odd. I’ve often heard the opposite.

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rawbface@reddit

Every week someone asks why we kick our kids out of the house the moment they turn 18. I don't think your premise is true.

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sadthrow104@reddit

There’s been a slew of troll/fishing sounding posts on this sub today

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IncomeLongjumping401@reddit

Because housing is stupidly expensive 😭

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RhinoGuy13@reddit

I was ready to move out at 18. I wasn't kicked out or anything though.

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TeamTurnus@reddit

Usually economic factors and the cost of housing, though Im curious when folks typically move out in your country as there are definitly other countries where multigenerational housing is more normalized

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machagogo@reddit

Wait, I thought we all get kicked out of the house at 18?

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southernjezebel@reddit

I moved out at 18.

Joke was on them though, the illness I was born with caught up with me when I was about 30 and became disabling and I had to move home. (Jk, they love me ferociously and always knew it was a likely eventuality so they had a mother-in-laws apartment built into their home for me already. ❤️)

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NixMaritimus@reddit

We used to move out quickly, but we can anymore because of the cost of rent and hosing is so high.

I was able to have an apartment for years, but I ended up having to move back in with my parents because of price hikes. It was $1100/mo when I moved in and $1500 when I left

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devnullopinions@reddit

There was literally a question earlier today about why Americans don’t live with their parents very long lol

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PrimaryHighlight5617@reddit

There has been a shift. Gen x had to GTFO. Older millennials had more of the means to leave home and there was still social pressures.

Younger millennials needed to stay home or moving back home due to economic necessity.

Now for gen z it is almost expected. Shits hard out here.

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pyramidalembargo@reddit

$$$$

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Similar_Ad2094@reddit

You're fucking kidding me right? Italians live with their parents until like 30.

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WhoWouldCareToAsk@reddit

Made me lol 😂

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SusanLFlores@reddit

I moved out and got my first car and first apartment when I was 16. Back then a person could afford an apartment working a minimum wage job. First car was $200 and my monthly rent was $155. I have no idea how people nowadays can afford anything earning only minimum wage.

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djcurry@reddit

I love this question, next week there’s gonna be a question on why Americans don’t stay with their problems longer.

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urnbabyurn@reddit

Why don’t Americans eat beef?

Why don’t Americans drive on highways as much?

Why aren’t Americans overweight?

Why don’t Americans speak English?

Why don’t Americans breathe air?

I feel like the premise of the question itself if wrong here.

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goblin_hipster@reddit

Freudian slip? 😆

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djcurry@reddit

lol, fair. I actually going to just leave it. 😂. It cracks me up.

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Space-cadet-66@reddit

Because we can’t afford rent

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molotovzav@reddit

I moved out at 18. So did most of the people I know. Staying with parents well into your 20s is a gen z thing that started really out of necessity. Wages have been stagnant for a while, and even when they rise it's not at a great rate for wanting to thrive. College is expensive. The launch period is expensive. I consider myself lucky I was 18 when this was just starting so I could afford to go to college and never see my parents again :).

Europeans also live with their parents forever. So I don't know who you are comparing us too. Met plenty of euros who are 28 and live at home.

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peabody_soul109@reddit

Do they? Not sure that’s true.

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Reddittoxin@reddit

With rising housing costs the rates of young adults moving out is declining.

I've joked we've just gone back to the days where you live at home until you get married, bc now a days it's not even having to have roommates to afford rent, it's having bed mates.

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AshtonCopernicus@reddit

I was out by 19, but not because I forced to be or anything -- my parents were great my entire life. It was just the independence I sought. I now live over 1000 miles away but I make sure to call my mom every Monday and Friday lol

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ABelleWriter@reddit

This may be the most confused I have ever been on this sub.

OP, where are you from???

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Reddittoxin@reddit

Our economy is in shambles lol

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thatsad_guy@reddit

We get the exact opposite question all the time

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Financial-Sweet-4648@reddit

Well, when the top 10% owns 93% of the stocks and accounts for 50% of goods and services expenditures in the economy, it’s hard for most of us to afford moving out. But that said, living at home doesn’t go on as long as the sensationalist media stories would have you believe. Most are out by 25, after recouping from college and socking some money away.

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Reliant20@reddit

I'm American, and I didn't know they did.

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Professional-Pungo@reddit

Americans historically don’t live with their parents very long…

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thomsenite256@reddit

Its gone up a lot. Its like 50% for under 29 now.

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Professional-Pungo@reddit

Sure I guess. I’d still say it’s far less than other countries.

Many Asian countries I know it’s common to live with your parents “until you get married”

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urnbabyurn@reddit

Nor comparatively to Europe, Asia and Latin America.

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Professional-Pungo@reddit

All of those countries are known to live with their parents for ages.

Some Asian places claim to live with their parents “until they get married” even

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paramorir@reddit

This doesn't track. Most of us want to get the hell out of our parents homes as soon as we are able.

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AdelleDeWitt@reddit

Where I live people often stay with their parents forever because housing is expensive and culturally a lot of the people here come from cultures where multi-generational living is common. Grandparents can watch the kids while you're at work and then you take care of the grandparents.

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Ok-Equivalent8260@reddit

I moved out at 18 🤷🏻‍♀️

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DJPaige01@reddit

My son moved out 1 week after he graduated from high school. I cried for a month.

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cornfarm96@reddit

What do you consider “so long”? Most people I know move out at 18-25. Usually the younger ones get a kind of roommate situation, but most (probably 20-25) just wait until they can afford their own rental or mortgage.

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PA_MallowPrincess_98@reddit

It depends on how you were raised. There are terrible parents who kick their kids out of the house on their 18th birthday or when they land an adult job. I still live at home because it's expensive to find a house or apartment. I have friends who don't live with their parents anymore and they always say that rent is expensive. Also, my parents are happy not to be empty nesters.

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Reduak@reddit

Living with your parents as an adult has a really, REALLY bad stigma attached to it. It's seen as a sign that the person has failed to get a job where they can support themselves. Most people think it basically means the person is a loser.

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Sigh-lens-peaks@reddit

Uh… Americans are known around the world for the opposite. We tend to encourage a culture here where we stigmatize anyone still living with their parents past the age of 18?

In a lot of South American and Asian countries people are encouraged to live with the their parents until they get married. It’s the norm.

Only here do we make people feel like shit for having supportive parents while you build up your life. Hell, even CHOOSING to live with your parents is commendable. As your parents get older, they need more help.

Now it’s becoming more common in the states. Not because theirs was a push back against current culture. It’s simply economics. A lot of people can’t afford to live on their own, and even those who can, many times struggle financially in one area or another.

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FrostRose172@reddit

Not sure what you are talking about. America is known foe tge culture of out at 18. However the economy is trash so many people are moving back in with their parents now. But it has been pushed down our throat to leave at 18.

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Wombatseal@reddit

In this economy?

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thomsenite256@reddit

Someone literally posted the opposite of this earlier today or maybe yesterday. HAH!

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Roadshell@reddit

Lol. The usual question we're dealing with is "how can you Americans kick your kids out when they're 18? How cruel, where I'm from three generations live under the same roof!"

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bonzai113@reddit

At 18, I left by my own choice. I wasn’t living one moment longer with my parents.

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MissFabulina@reddit

I know, right? I was like...this is exactly the opposite of what we are usually being accused of!

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urnbabyurn@reddit

Yeah, I’m wondering what country OP is thinking about where it’s so much younger, because in much of asia, europe, and Latin America it’s far more common to live at home longer into adulthood.

United States: In the US, young adults (25–34) are less likely to live at home compared to their European counterparts, with about 16.7% doing so, lower than many European, especially Southern European, rates.

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philplant@reddit

Engagement bait

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Ainjhel32@reddit

I can't speak for everyone but my take home pay is about $2200 per month. Average rent in my area is $800-$1000, electric is another $250-$300, water is $150. Then you have cat insurance which is another $100-$200 every month plus has and maintenance. Then you have to have health insurance, dental, vision. It's just not financially viable for most of us to live on our own

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44035@reddit

Usually it's cheaper to live with your parents than to live on your own. I know, really groundbreaking information.

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Quirky_Commission_56@reddit

I was an only child and had to take care of my disabled mother, maternal grandfather, and my great aunt simultaneously and they were all wheelchair bound and I had my toddler with me as well. Then they sold the house I grew up in and moved to the middle of nowhere to a mobile home.

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sandbagger45@reddit

I thought the perception that everyone else had was that we get kicked out at 18??

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marksman81991@reddit

Economy

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LABELyourPHOTOS@reddit

It has to do with affordability here more than culture.

While many cultures stayed pretty late traditionally (like all of Southern Europe espcially Croatia - over 30!) USA left home pretty early about 20 on average.

Now the average is closer to 25-26 here. We get out of college about 23 and then take a couple years.

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Top_Copy_693@reddit

Places like Europe have considerably more young people from 18-30 that live at home with their parents than the US does.

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The_Ham_Sandwich_God@reddit

Housing is expensive and jobs don't pay enough money to ever afford them.

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Positive-Avocado-881@reddit

Which is it? Do Americans kick their kids out early or do we let them live with with their parents for too long?

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SummonBahamutZero@reddit

Is this a joke post?

More often than not I’m seeing how Americans are so terrible because we throw out our young the day they turn 18

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Off1ceb0ss@reddit

I wanted to get out asap. My mom was very controlling. She threatened me in every way possible. My son was so much like me, and I helped him with his independence. I paid for his apartment for a while, until he graduated college. Idk why my mom was like that. She always worried what “the neighbors” thought much more than what WE were thought. I’m very glad that despite that, idgaf what ANYONE thinks.

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