How to stop scam calls? Worried for my elderly mother.

Posted by Krispykreemi@reddit | AskUK | View on Reddit | 53 comments

My mother is elderly and is pretty clued up. She's getting rude scam calls pressuring her to do actions on a laptop or phone in regards to her bank account.

I visited her roughly once a week to once every two weeks. She was upset at the tone of some of these callers who are just aggressive. So far she always says I'll get my son to help while they obviously tell her no it's urgent she does whatever they want.

Today I've told her not to engage as they'll just reschedule calls as she is interacting with them. Just hangup. However I'm really worried as she gets older that she may become a victim of these scams. How on earth do I get them to stop or auto-block calls.

I need some advice on what to do or who to contact that could help.

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OriginalPlonker@reddit

Tell her that her bank will never call her. Anyone calling 'from the bank' is a scammer. Tell her to reply with "my bank doesn't call me" and hang up. She does not need to be polite to these people.

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EvilInCider@reddit

We had someone from Age Concern UK visit my in laws in response to this EXACT problem.

They stayed for hours, chatted through all sorts of scenarios, helped with their online safety and accounts.

Bloody brilliant to be honest!

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BulkyAccident@reddit

Age UK are absolutely amazing and my 'go to' charity if I've got some spare cash.

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Tumeni1959@reddit

Landline or mobile? Who's the phone provider?

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Krispykreemi@reddit (OP)

Landline, sky UK

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Tumeni1959@reddit

Sky have a product for this. Talk Shield.

Anyone on your Mum's good list gets put through straight away, any unrecognised number gets filtered; the caller has to state their name, and this would be announced to your Mum when she picks up the phone. Keystroke to accept or decline.

My in-laws were being plagued with scam calls, they all disappeared after switching this on.

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InquisitorVawn@reddit

Anyone on your Mum's good list gets put through straight away, any unrecognised number gets filtered; the caller has to state their name, and this would be announced to your Mum when she picks up the phone. Keystroke to accept or decline.

If you do this make sure any GP or specialists she has appointments with know they need to leave a name. I believe in some cases due to privacy concerns, medical establishments won't leave a message of any sort when they call, they'll just try calling back.

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Tumeni1959@reddit

If they're on the whitelist, they get put through straight away ...

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InquisitorVawn@reddit

Most hospital specialists in my experience come through as private number. Or if it's a new referral she might not have their number saved to her contact list.

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Least_Temperature_23@reddit

Get her a call blocking phone. We recently got one for our elderly relative, who’d started getting weird calls. It automatically blocks known and presumed spammer numbers, and has a red button you can press to block any caller from contacting you again, should they manage to bypass the pre-loaded system. You can screen unrecognised callers before choosing whether to answer or block, so if an unknown number calls it’s automatically intercepted, they have to say who they are and why they’re calling you, and you decide whether to speak to them (or press the red button and never hear from them again!)

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Krispykreemi@reddit (OP)

So you know what model or type of phone it was?

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Over-Language2599@reddit

My mother had some kind of extra gadget box of tricks that gave every caller a recorded message and asked then to leave their name. Basically it screened the calls.

Then it would ring the phone, play you whatever they recorded, and ask you if you wanted to accept the call. If so, you pressed a button and were connected with the caller, who had been put on hold.

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Least_Temperature_23@reddit

A BT one, I believe. There are loads of them on Amazon.

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Mistigeblou@reddit

If its landline add their 'sheild' (or whatever your provider calls it) option the caller has to state their reasons for calling then it rings at your mums end 'you have a call from im calling about your recent car accident, do you want to accept'

Not sure if it works on iPhone but theres an app Truecaller which you can actively block numbers and texts but also on the screen if they arent already on your block list it will list then as spam, scam etc

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EuphoricCover8449@reddit

Short term solution, change her number.

Long term, set her phone up to only accept calls in her contact list.

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HarketSavoy@reddit

That excludes doctors and hospitals.

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Silver_Procedure_490@reddit

Exactly. That’s the issue then. Blocks important calls.

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EuphoricCover8449@reddit

Doctor calls patient and gets 'this phone does not receive calls from hidden numbers'. Obviously doctor then decides to let the patient die rather than use another phone without it's number hidden.

Family member makes arrangements with doctors and hospital to receive calls on their mothers behalf.

Alternatively, OPs mum gives all her money away to that nice man from the bank. Then pays more for the recovery scam.

Or, OP changes her mums number.

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apple_kicks@reddit

On my phone and whatapps i block unknown numbers it forces them to leave a message and scammers and cold callers never do

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jbennett360@reddit

We use one of these. Can't remember the last time we had a spam call

https://www.truecall.co.uk/shop/truecall-call-blocker

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G-reeper66@reddit

When I know I have a scammer on the phone if they get through my filter I open with "War Office, want a fight?"

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-info-sec-@reddit

Don't have a landline. We just got scammy calls.

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EfficientRegret@reddit

If she has an iPhone setup call screening for unknown numbers (I’m not sure if android also has this). You can get her a new number too, I recently changed mine as part of a little digital hygiene thing I’m doing

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elhazelenby@reddit

Android phones will often have a feature that shows any calls that are suspected spam

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627UK@reddit

Android has option to bin calls from numbers not in your contact list.

Great - except when you're expecting an important call from the hospital, or other organisation that withholds their number

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HarketSavoy@reddit

People need a reason to call you, and you’ll get a sentence for their reason. Legit callers will give it, but spam callers won’t. Actually realised it’s stopped spam! 😻

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OkTadpole2920@reddit

My android phone had this feature years ago, it's amazingly good.

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apocalypsebrow@reddit

It's on Android too, I have it set up and it works really well so far

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CumGuzlinGutterSluts@reddit

Damn I wish my dad still had the knowwith to call me when this shit happens to get my opinion. He just clicks on whatever the hell is sent to him and regularly is complaining that he never recieved the parts he ordered and then I go an check the companies website and just immediately 🤦‍♂️

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plz_be_nice_im_sad@reddit

Add her details to the TPS https://www.tpsonline.org.uk/

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ChrisRR@reddit

Scammers don't respect the tps. It makes no difference

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HR_Specter@reddit

Is this only for landline numbers or can you use it for mobile numbers as well?

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alt_ruthless@reddit

I've got my mobile number registered on there and have had NO unsolicited calls since then - best decision ever.

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Krispykreemi@reddit (OP)

I checked this, her phone number is registered already.

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redandbluedragoneyes@reddit

tell her not to answer any calls that come from a number she does nto know and is not expecting, when ingore this, they eventually stop calling you.
If she has a smart phone, is if it has call screening, on my pixel, whenever a call comes in and if i do not know it, i press screen and it plays a message and then transcribes the response and i can then decide to answer or reject, most of the time, they hang up.
most phones do have a setting to auto reject call from numbers that or not in your contact list and numbers that come has private/withheld etc.

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OkTadpole2920@reddit

Numbers that come up private or withheld are usually hospitals and doctors surgeries.

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Boboshady@reddit

You can get phones that include advanced call blocking, basically you whitelist numbers in it so known numbers can still ring through, everything else goes through to answerphone or gets redirected or just blocked, depending on the settings and your preferences.

Have a look on Amazon (or elsewhere) for 'Call Guardian' or 'Advanced Call Blocking' for starters.

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srm79@reddit

First thing, change her number and make sure it's ex-directory. Then, let family know to only use landline number. Get a new mobile phone with a new number. And, only let banks, utilities and Internet / phone companies go through two-factor authentication.

I had to set this up for my Nan. I also programmed her landline phones with family numbers(every base station) - if it doesn't show a name, she knows not to answer

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RecentTwo544@reddit

Surprised no-one has mentioned this, but if she's happy to do this, and you're not a rampant gambler or smack addict, you can be set up to act on her behalf.

Can't remember what it's called now (think it varies company to company) but basically it isn't like Power of Attorney where you totally take over her financial decisions as used in the case of dementia or the like, but you can get equal power where you deal with these things for her/on her behalf, so these scammer have to go through you, and you just tell them to get fucked/don't answer the call.

If ever you/her do need to move thousands of £ for an actual legitimate reason, you'll set it up and she'll still need to green-light it via her bank to make sure you're not financially abusing her.

When it's an actual bank, not some scammer, there's lot of options and they're very very good with people who have older relatives who are getting caught up in this. Partly out of niceness, but also because under a certain amount they can also be liable for the shortfall if a customer is scammed.

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NoodleDoodlesocks@reddit

Set up call screening. The kind that lets through known numbers but makes unknown numbers state their name/purpose before letting it through.

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Silver_West_4950@reddit

You can buy landline phones that block spam calls. They’re not too pricey so it’s worth investing.

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mtjseb@reddit

If she uses an iPhone you could turn on the feature where you have to say the reason you’re calling so can easier screen the call before picking it up

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Feersum_endjjinn@reddit

Sky have this for landlines as far as im aware.

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BabyGirlEliza@reddit

Deffo get her a new number, once they know a number is active/able to be scammed it gets passed and sold everywhere they can, sometimes with addition info they gathered on these calls to gain their trust in the future, esp if it’s the number of someone more vulnerable to being scammed. I have learning disabilities and started to fall for a call one time, I realised and ended the call way before getting scammed and blocked the number, from that day I went from getting a scam call a couple times a year to getting multiple scam calls A DAY. I changed my number and the scam calls went back to being super rare and random.

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AirlineSevere7456@reddit

If it's an unknown number do not answer. If it's important they'll leave a message or contact a different way.

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alt_ruthless@reddit

I highly recommend registered on the Telephone Preference Services: https://www.tpsonline.org.uk/

Per their website: The free opt out service enabling you to record your preference on the official register and not receive unsolicited sales or marketing calls.

Step in the right direction as I've received no unsolicited calls since registering!

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Krispykreemi@reddit (OP)

I checked. The phone numbers already registered.

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LilacScentedStoat@reddit

If its landline, can the company help?

Or maybe set up call forwarding so it goes to you and then you could pass on any important messages in person.

If it's mobile, should be able to filter spam calls out .

Also, try and tell her about the 5 second rule. When she picks up the phone, don't speak for at least 5 seconds. If it's a Bot it scans for speech and then connects to scammer, if it detects no speech, no connection and call ends.

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