Do you think people are more lonely/isolated now?

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sebbLz@reddit

Yes. Not sure if it’s a UK or a global phenomenon. I suspect it not to be the case in SEA as much given their social norms are communal

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dbxp@reddit

Pricing structures are very different there. In a lot of Asia it's cheaper to go out than stay in

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Yeah most definitely can be that way. Food especially is cheaper. Even general living is cheaper. Social media is both good and bad. I also think town planning is a big part to play, unless you live in a city everywhere requires some form of travel, then comes inconvenience as everyone and everything is further away, then comes the default of staying in because you can just chat online instead.

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dbxp@reddit

I don't mean that costs are lower in general but that the pricing strucutre is different.

For example in the UK the majority of the cost of a pint goes towards staffing and premises so it is way more expensive than the supermarket, in SEA the beer itself makes up a much larger proportion of the cost. SEA typically taxes things like imported electronics highly making sometimes making them more expensive than the UK and rent is insane compared to income.

In the UK it's generally cheap to stay in and expensive to go out, SEA is the opposite

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sebbLz@reddit

Absolutely. Tax on cars in Singapore and in Thailand is extortionate.

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Filthy_Oily_Fanny@reddit

I don’t even have a kitchen in Bangkok. I’d have to pay a lot more for a condo with a western style kitchen.

So it’s eat out every night or order a grab. For me it’s 6 nights a week I eat out.

There’s argument on the forums about whether it’s actually more expensive to cook yourself here too.

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arichard@reddit

I think that people are getting more diverse in their interests and it's harder to find "your tribe". I think that means that when they go out they are less likley to have a good time. I made a website called club launchpad so that people can start clubs without having to tell the world who they are before they have enough support in their local are. It's not going well, no one seems interested.

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PralineEmergency7260@reddit

Sound interesting I’m going to check that out.

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arichard@reddit

I'm happy to help if you have any questions. We've managed to launch our first club in Sheffield. It's one for women who want to do sport but were never good at it, and want to try different ones. They are having their first meeting on Saturday.

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skkkrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr@reddit

Overall YES but I don’t think it’s once size fits all.

I think a lot of people who previously would have been isolated and lonely, now find themselves having many online relationships and social interactions.

Many people who were / would have previously been hugely social interactions outdoor settings, at social events and third spaces are likely feeling it.

I think since 2016 things have become HYPER commercial. Everything costs money, things are more expensive, third spaces closing down, social venues closing down.

I think TikTok genuinely has fundamentally changed society, even more so than Facebook did.

It’s very clear that overall, on a human interaction level, the world it’s a lot more shit than it was pre Covid.

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360Saturn@reddit

I think TikTok genuinely has fundamentally changed society

I've never used it so, I wonder whst things you've seen coming from it and changing things that I might not have picked up on having that as the source?

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skkkrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr@reddit

Hyper individualism. Everything you do should be about your brand, every hobby you do should be a content piece or monetised not for enjoyment.

Propaganda for extreme ideologies such as misogyny, misandry, nationalistic hatred (not patriotism) etc spreads like wildfire and is causing many issues between youth (men hating women, women hating men).

Fake news everywhere.

Cosmetic surgery and harmful peptide products being pushed on kids.

Everything being recorded (go to a concert, 80% of people watch the whole show through their phone while recording it).

Adult topics highly targeted at young people, gambling, drugs etc.

Huge commercialism and consumerism pushed on kids and adults.

Huge amount of faking lifestyles which makes people out of touch with reality. Many young people are told to never be satisfied with what they have, instead of being happy, always try get more.

Adults and kids are GLUED to their phones all the time.

Honestly it’s so prevalent everywhere.

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360Saturn@reddit

All that comes from tiktok??? Bloody hell. I'm still baffled that people get addicted to such things. I always figured I had just come across certain weirdos.

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skkkrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr@reddit

It’s across all social media now but I think TikTok arguably had the best engagement algorithm and objectively pioneered short form content as we know it today.

Now insta has reels and YouTube has shorts… but it’s mostly the same thing.

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360Saturn@reddit

I still don't understand why regular people feel like they are 'a brand'. We used to laugh at that kind of delusion. Now it looks like they are hero worshipped?

This is what gets me about so many gen Z & younger idols. They are the kind of people monoculture society would have laughed at and used as the butt of the joke. Blokes obsessed with their appearance to the extent of having a load of cosmetic surgeries in their early 20s and inventing a term for it, lookmaxing? That kind of person would have been publically shamed 20 years ago. Today they act like cult leaders??? Utterly bizarre.

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birchblonde@reddit

What changed in 2016?

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Glittering_Vast938@reddit

Hmmm I wonder?

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birchblonde@reddit

I genuinely am wondering

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couragethecurious@reddit

It all started with a gorilla named Harambe...

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fannyfox@reddit

DOFH

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purple_spade@reddit

Pokemon Go was released

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SamVimesBootTheory@reddit

Yeah for me I'm someone who if it wasn't for the internet I'd likely have minimal social interactions with anyone outside of immediate family and it's like on the one hand kinda great as I can connect with people but also a pain but it's not the same as like having people I can actually physically interact with as it's the usual joke about 'the cool people you meet online live in Narnia or someshit'

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Aggressive_Fish461@reddit

My mum doesn’t watch tv anymore - only YouTube. And some of it is created by AI and she doesn’t even realise

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OneObi@reddit

Existing became expensive.

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Pen_dragons_pizza@reddit

I can totally relate about the parents part.

My 80 year old parents doom scroll and spend all their time watching twats on YouTube give them false news about the country and world.

I asked my dad if he wanted to come to London with me, his answer was that it’s too dangerous right ? Stabbing, thefts and crime on every corner.

The fact that nothing online is checked and you have some 20 year old giving life advice is shocking.

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Abject-Cod5144@reddit

My best friend lives hours away, which sucks. Thats pretty isolating.

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blaikalva@reddit

Im 24. my adulthood was all Covid or post Covid. And I’m lonely as shit. I work remote, my family lives in another country and unless we’re drinking my friends don’t go out. I can go days without seeing a person

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Cazspresso@reddit

I thought I was fine with it until my wedding came. Realising I’ve got no one to ask to be bridesmaids, no one to organise a hen do and no one to get excited with me and chat wedding with. My only friend, my best friend of 20 years showed her true colours and didn’t even turn up to the wedding after saying she would organise a hen do and didn’t bother with that either, she’s not my friend anymore. Between my husband and I, we had a total of 16 guests and that’s everyone we know.

I feel like people think it’s fine to just say they can’t be bothered without considering who they’re affecting and it makes everyone feel like shit and wonder why they even bother in the first place. I’ve lost so many friends over the years because all they do is flake. It makes me paranoid that they think I’m not worth the effort. Maybe I’m not.

So yes, I’m very lonely and as mentioned in another comment, I do think it’s because I used to have such a great social life in my 20s and 30s that it’s difficult to not have that anymore. I am trying to fix it though by being a volunteer at my archery club and I like to chat to random strangers at gigs which is always a positive experience but I can feel others aren’t as keen.

Apologies that this has turned into an essay. It’s just something I do think a lot about.

TLDR: Yes I’m lonely asf

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PlaneWar203@reddit

I think this is a problem too. Your friend was asked to do something very big, maybe felt uncomfortable saying no, maybe they didn't have the money or time to plan a big celebration for another person. And you cut them out of your life because they didn't go out of their way for you. "Oh you won't do this, you were never my friend!" I think people need to be more lenient with friends and lower expectations.

People are so comfortable with cutting people out now, people expect too much from others and react in the extreme when they don't get it.

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Cazspresso@reddit

Bold of you to assume that I asked her to organise my hen do. As soon as I set the wedding date, she jumped straight into telling me she was going to organise a hen do and said it several times. I know she had the money and time as she makes four times what I do, has no dependents or partner and I know she has time as she makes time for her other friends. In fact I insisted it would be a simple afternoon tea. Actually I never asked anything big of her. That and the fact she never turned up to my wedding was just the icing on the cake of a long record of her letting me down repeatedly for years. I did even talk to her about it but nothing changed. I never outright said I was cutting her out of my life. I just laid into her after the final straw and she stopped pretending to care after that.
I’m not cold hearted and thoughtless like you assume.

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PhilosophyFormer4609@reddit

Tbf im 26 and I fully understand where youre coming from. Ive got one actual close friend and the flakiness from others is insane, especially in dating. Word of advice, dont stick with British people. Ive only ever been able to befriend one British person (who is now my bestie) and everyone else i have contavt with isn't from the uk.

British people just suck icl, and im british lol

Try traveling to somewhere like berlin and staying at a hostel and just talking to people there. Ive had more genuine "normal" conversations there than anywhere else pre social media.

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Whole_Adhesiveness79@reddit

You definitely have a point, but just wondering, are you a man?

What you're suggesting is really good in theory, but through the lens of a woman it's more and more terrifying these days to venture out alone to make connections sadly.

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PhilosophyFormer4609@reddit

Jesus christ dude its the safest its been for women in our entire history of existence.

Your being a victim of mass media and feer mongering.

Book the flight, dont look scared or intimidated (thats how bullies and weirdos suss out victims, regardless of gender) and go explore the world.

The only alternative is to stay inside and remain scared to go outside and waist your life.

Again, its never been safer to be a woman on her own. Stop listening to feer mongerers and go do cool shit 😎

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Whole_Adhesiveness79@reddit

I do plenty of cool shit, and have travelled a lot - although admittedly not as often as when I was younger. I'm in my 30s. And no actually, in my country femicide has skyrocketed in the last 10 years. But go off, lol.

Women aren't 'fearmongered' or victims of media for having legitimate worries for their safety with the worrying trends in a lot of countries lately.

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PhilosophyFormer4609@reddit

The trends are that the rates of domestic abuse, assaults and murders have been steadily going down across the whole of Europe decade after decade.

In your own logic, stay inside, dont do anything and stay scared, peace ✌️

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Whole_Adhesiveness79@reddit

You're actually wrong as reports of assaults and domestic violence has went up, reports of both have risen sharply in many areas of Europe. 1 in 3 women in Europe have experienced gender based violence. The only obvious figure I see that has went down is homicide as a whole. You're objectively wrong. Have a nice day. Peace ✌️

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PhilosophyFormer4609@reddit

And 40% of men (almost 1 in 2) have experienced psychological violence

Maybe go read the other states before crying victim

I can see why your friend didn't bother making a hen do for you now. Probably got fed up of the victim mindset you have :/

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Whole_Adhesiveness79@reddit

You obviously can't read, as I'm not the same user as above who spoke of her hen do. Also, you can't spell either, from before - it's 'You're' and 'Doesn't'. :)

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PhilosophyFormer4609@reddit

Im not, someones just scared to go explore the world and dosent like being called out for it

Peace ✌️

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Whole_Adhesiveness79@reddit

Did you miss the part where I said i have travelled a lot? You are only in your 20s and have a lot to learn. If I had a daughter, I'd be worried for her safety travelling for sure- based on some of my own scary experiences travelling. I didn't say it wasn't worth exploring, but women are quite rightfully apprehensive about going places ALONE. Be thankful you've been privileged enough to have no experienced that yourself.

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PhilosophyFormer4609@reddit

Nope, dont care, stay scared and stay a victim ✌️

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PhilosophyFormer4609@reddit

There are also women only dorms in 99% of hostels now. The world is incredibly safe and easy to explore compared to what it was 20 years ago.

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PlaneWar203@reddit

I think a lot of people are unhappy with their living situations and constantly stressed, it makes it hard to be happy,make friends, build a nest for a potential family. You're in survival mode and your head doesn't have space for relaxing

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flinstoneguy55@reddit

I most certainly am... I was in my second year of university when the pandemic happened. It's like everything was cut short and I never managed to finish my projects, my degree, or build on the friendships I had started....

Ever since, I have not made a single new friend. It's like I forgotten how and I don't know where to find the time anymore. I've been feeling so lonely and at the same time I've not been able to identify any gaps in my day where I can squeeze a new friendship. It's like working has consumed the entirety of my life.

I think for me especially as an autistic person it's incredibly important that I spend time to nurture the friendship and that the friendship intensity is mutual ..which I find very rare with adults. So it's extra hard for me to sacrifice home chores or healthy habits or being with the people I already have in my life, in order to find time to invest in getting to know someone new that might not even turn out to be a decent friend at all

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Caribelle1234@reddit

Interesting. Is this considered a mostly UK thing? I made a post recently asking about life in the U.K and many ppl said they considered there to be a cold and lonely place - with ppl being very reserved/antisocial.

I don't think it's a worldwide thing. Certainly not in the Caribbean. And we have phones too so I don't think that's the main factor.

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LargeLetter1@reddit

Yes. And it’s not just young people. A huge number of retired people seem completely miserable and spend all day moaning on Facebook or getting obsessed with issues that are completely irrelevant to them. The number one issue in phone ins last week was tumble dryers.

Loneliness is the minds way of saying it craves company. We are social animals. No one felt happier after 3 hours of doom scrolling.

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Bossman_Mike@reddit

My grandfather retired in 1984. Before his death in 2007 he had been a Rotarian, volunteered at the Citizens Advice Bureau, put his name forward for the local council (but was never elected), went fishing, all sorts.

My father retired in 2018 and does fuck all.

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dwair@reddit

There have always been a huge number of miserable old people though. At least now they stay in doors rather than kicking off in the post office.

Also some people are social animals whilst others are not. I feel a lot less stressed and angered by society now when I can avoid direct contact with it than in the 1980's when I couldn't. Even internet based interactions are becoing more pleasant than a decade ago when you realise you are arguing with a bot and not a human being 90% of the time.

I do agree about not feeling good after 3 hours of doom scrolling though. Thing is if your life is so empty you feel compelled to behave like that anyway, what would you being doing with your time instead? Maybe going to the post office and kicking off or shouting at youths hanging out in bus shelters?

The Internet isn't the problem. People are.

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lilphoenixgirl95@reddit

That’s a bit short sighted. Some people doom scroll intermittently. I’m disabled but do a lot of ad hoc legal advocacy work. I have many hobbies: writing, frontend coding, design, reading, singing, researching, etc., my partner who I love, and two cats I adore.

But disability is hard. I often cannot work on anything at all. Not even answer a phone call or reply to a brief but important email. I often have to spend a lot of time on the toilet (hours, moderate pain cycling with severe pain and brief gaps without pain). I could read a book but it’s hard to have any attention span when you’re in constant pain in your GI system, joints, muscles, bones, skin, head...

So what better than to doomscroll? I just wish doomscrolling could eradicate the doom and rage but still be mentally engaging

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Prudent-Pressure2146@reddit

Yeah I know it’s quite boring when people blame everything on phones but phone addiction really is a crippling thing. I’m the most online person I know and my screen time is so so bad, but I still have a massive friend circle and keep busy socially and I think a lot of people aren’t bothering with that side of it any more

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98675436856@reddit

What’s your screen time

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Prudent-Pressure2146@reddit

According to the app on my phone 6 hours, which is v bad when you consider I also work looking at a screen

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Bossman_Mike@reddit

I don't care how unpopular this makes me on here, but part of it is people embracing WFH like a boa constrictor.

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No-Objective9145@reddit

I think it’s the cost of living. Going out costs money and people are much poorer now than before.

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RegularStrength4850@reddit

This combined with vanishing third spaces. You'd better live quite near nature and warm weather, otherwise good luck

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birchblonde@reddit

Do you really think that people went out more due to pressure? Not that it was affordable and they enjoyed it?

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PhilosophyFormer4609@reddit

I think you're seen as less weird for staying in now. When I was a kid, all the adults made out that all their fellow piers who didn't like going out where were just weirdos who were up to no good like pedophiles, rapists or just straight up weirdos lol.

As ive grown up ive now realised they just didn't wanna socialise with incredibly judgey and narrow minded individuals.

And last time I went out, about 8 months ago (im now 26), I had the realisation that most people my own age in these areas and places are thick as shit.

Theres other reasons as well but I wont go into them.

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Low-Caterpillar8823@reddit (OP)

That definitely what I was getting at with the pressure of going out but wasn't sure how to put it into words

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Normal-Tip-5274@reddit

id say definitely yes. thought about this a while ago when I went to the store to go buy something that my mum would have 100% borrowed from the neighbours.

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lilphoenixgirl95@reddit

to the store

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yyyyzryrd@reddit

100%. It's been wallop after wallop after wallop as of late. Covid has had irrefutable damage on society and economy. It's been COL crisis after COL crisis since then. People are, as a whole, worse off, seeing their friends less, dating less, going out less, and making fewer friends.

The biggest issues are the shrinking economy/rise of AI and social media. It is a difficult time to want to make new friends or to see your current friends. Social media especially is quite vile, there is so much hate and toxicity, it's absolutely unparalleled with anything I've seen before. I have one real-life friend I see on a semi-regular basis. Everyone else (minus the missus and family) is online.

Many people have given up, especially gen z. This isn't anything specific to the UK, but it's a huge (and growing) problem. The solutions to these issues will be quite paramount (most likely wealth distribution going back to how it was decades ago, as trickle-down has proven to be a complete fad which does not work).

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lilphoenixgirl95@reddit

Lol of course trickle down words. Did you think it was supposed to work for the general population?

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tigerbnny@reddit

Yes, loneliness is subjective and some people are fine without a lot of social interaction but the ONS does have some significant stats on loneliness which don't look very good tbh and something being subjective doesn't make it not real to the person experiencing it.

In terms of isolation I think a lot about the sentiment "everyone wants a village but nobody wants to be a villager", as quite an introvert leaning community I see this all the time on Reddit, people post entire threads about avoiding doing someone a favour/expecting financial compensation for doing anything and while I don't think those people are unreasonable (because they're consistent and typically people who don't ask for favours themselves) that way of viewing interpersonal relationships is kinda sad, it's nice doing favours for other people and it's nice to have people you can rely on when you need something! In more recent years I've become much more of a favour giver/asker than I ever was in young adulthood and it's actually great!

I feel like people are increasingly socially paranoid (which is also a symptom of loneliness), I know everyone's had bad experiences with friendships where you're giving more than you're receiving but there's this hypervigilance about friends "using you to trauma dump" or asking for help with some task they could outsource to a professional but are your friends only meant to exist as a source of recreation for you?

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lilphoenixgirl95@reddit

It’s cultural as well. UK does not like anyone who doesn’t fit in. I am very well loved by the handful of people in this country who love me including my partner and my best friend. The general public though? No. I couldn’t go through a single job without being extensively mocked, even by the people I made ‘friends’ with. I am aware of social cues etc. but I am a naturally direct (not rude, I go out of my way to not cause offence on every situation). People do not like it. They do not like it if I ask for something I am expected to understand to be explained to me. If my facial expressions are too emotive. Etc.

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PhilosophyFormer4609@reddit

Right?? Its nice to be needed and Important to someone, its how memories are made lol

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Defiant_Dealer8904@reddit

Social Media has taken over, and cost of living is also another reason.

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yorkspirate@reddit

My personal take is I think people are more aware that they dont have to be part of a 'village' unless they want to be. The last decade has seen mental wellness become more prevalent instead of simply going along with the flow

Lonesome isn't lonely.......... I'm much happier now in my early 40's with a handful of people I consider family compared to the hundreds of friends I had in my teens and twenties

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zombie_Ernie@reddit

Our local pub has been hanging on since covid. It did see a brief resurgence when lockdown ended, and people had money burning a hole in their pocket. But I've been in there in a Saturday and there's been about 12 people in there all night.

I think it's a combination of people's habits changing after covid. And sky high drink prices. Not helped by Rachel's ni increase last year.

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W51976@reddit

Stagnation of wages, the Covid isolation for 1-2 years on and off, then factor in the cost of living since 2022, all making things much harder to afford a night out once a week, or meeting people for a meal or other activities.

It definitely feels different to how things were back in 2019.

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PhilosophyFormer4609@reddit

Also pubs are just weird and dangerous places to be icl

The amount of times someones been punched or SA'd in a pub is insane.

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W51976@reddit

Not every pub is like that.

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Dangerous-Regret-358@reddit

An interesting thread with some interesting comments, the views of most of which I share. Most of them concern current day problems but I contend that the problems of today have their roots in how our society has changed since the end of the war.

People prospered after the war and with that prosperity any sense of social solidarity was eroded bit by bit. Now, addiction to screens, firstly through the introduction of television and then the internet/social media, has atomised people to such an extent that they have lost any sense of collective belonging or ability to organise anything!

I don't believe that people are so hard up that they can't organise a pot-luck dinner or buffet with their neighbours, or that they don't have the time to cook cheaper food from fresh instead of wasting money on processed equivalents.

I don't believe people have no time to engage, when they are sat at home staring blankly at their phones or laptops. People have choices, and things are the way they are because they just can't be bothered.

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PhilosophyFormer4609@reddit

Tbf people dont stay in long term places anymore. Whats the point of getting to know your neighbours when half of them are renters in hmos?

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98675436856@reddit

Plus there is less chance of problems if you don’t interact with your neighbours, I don’t want to feel like I have to chat with someone every time I leave the house

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98675436856@reddit

I don’t even want to socialise with people anymore. I just feel drained all the time. I would say I do feel a bit lonely but not enough to do something about it.

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jasminenice@reddit

Snap.

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worldtraveller200@reddit

Some reasons imo, at work we have a staff bar (and its much better than pubs) but hardly anyone goes into the office on friday, they will WFH. Also i think the pandemic made people more clique as other departments don't really interact much and the people that do go to the bar are not social. I moved back to my home city in 2020 and its been a complete pain trying to make new friends. The cost of living has killed a lot of meet up events (but also lot of weirdos put people off going)

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Cheap-Mud-3140@reddit

It’s these damn phones

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Consistent-Pirate-23@reddit

How else should we keep in touch with family and friends that live a distance away?

Tin cans are great but the wires keep snapping

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Cheap-Mud-3140@reddit

Nothing wrong with house phones is there haha

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Consistent-Pirate-23@reddit

Mumbles in family abroad

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Cheap-Mud-3140@reddit

Send a post card

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sbaldrick33@reddit

Didn't help to put us in touch with more people we like. Just made us aware of more people we hate.

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T4rch@reddit

Fkin hell, well said

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EUskeptik@reddit

The high cost of going out plays a part.

A pint of beer can cost £10 in central London. Meals out have rocketed in price. 🚀

The cost of living crisis has escalated, people have little or no money left after paying for essentials.

-##-

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coffeewalnut08@reddit

I do think so. It’s harder to meet people in my experience, especially in more rural areas

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hashbrowneggyolk0520@reddit

I've always been quite introverted so spending time by myself doesn't usually bother me. I'm also autistic and so building relationships with people has never come naturally to me.

I wouldn't say I feel Ionely though.

I wouldn't say no to having more friends but at the same time i'm pretty content with where i'm at right now, although that's not to say my feelings won't/can't change.

I would say the cost of living hasn't helped, there's a lack of third spaces that don't involve spending money, travel is expensive and so many people are working as many hours as possible just to keep their heads above water and pay the bills.

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Fraggle_ninja@reddit

Yeah there’s a big field of psychology studying the rising level of loneliness, lack of community and connection. A longitudinal study from Harvard studying young men in the 1969’s as they aged found the ones who scored better relationships, more community etc fared better than those who didn’t and they even said impact of loneliness was more impactful that some diseases. If you interested and use Google scholar look for loneliness, community, stress and you’ll find studies!

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KimbaTheLion@reddit

There's an increasing narrative not to trust other people, going out is bad, put yourself first. It's all framed as self protection and valuing yourself but part of being valued is being valued for your contribution to society. We're social creatures. We're being stripped of the things that actually make life worth living.

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Prudent-Pressure2146@reddit

Yeh I know everyone on the internet isn’t the same person but there’s endless threads on here along the lines of ‘do I HAVE to go to my pals wedding/what’s the point of birthday parties/why do my colleagues have to talk to me’ alongside stuff like ‘how do you make friends as an adult it’s impossible/why am I so bored and lonely’

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Thomasinarina@reddit

BINGO. The price we pay for community is annoyance, and the price we pay for freedom is loneliness.

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Thomasinarina@reddit

Every time I see the phrase ‘you don’t owe anyone anything’ I die a little inside.

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skkkrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr@reddit

Short form content, hustle culture and individualism is really peaking in the West… and overall I think it’s making people unhappy.

Maybe it’s just me… but the world feels a lot less fun and hopeful.

For young people, they don’t even have the hope of a successful career as AI hype is destroying that narrative, even if it’s not true.

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KimbaTheLion@reddit

It's all a way to keep us trapped inside, spending money to fill the gap that sitting in a beer garden with your mates or having a Sunday roast with your family and some close friends used to achieve very cheaply

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Alth12@reddit

I notice this as a delivery driver. The disposable income people used to use going out is now increasingly spent online shopping. As much as there definitely is a cost of living crisis I don't think thats been analyzed enough. Got people on my round who can't afford to go out (their words) but will drops 100s of pounds on clothes etc every month. Not going anywhere to wear the clothes so seems silly to me, but i guess we all cope differently.

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No-Animator-8283@reddit

I agree, there’s no community anymore.

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dbxp@reddit

Yes but it varies by location and age.

I can see there being far more lonely young people living with their parents in suburbs. Demographics can be quite split by location with all the young people and things targeting them in the cities.

Divorces have also increased over the years and fewer people having kids. There was an assumption back in the day that people in their late 30s and 40s were busy with their kids which isn't really the case now

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W51976@reddit

That’s such a broad stroke though. There’s plenty of people who are having families in their early 30s, which will keep them busy for the next 20 plus years.

My cousin is the same age as me, nearly 50, has two young lads who are both at school. She’s always busy doing something.

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dbxp@reddit

Yes, this thread is about those broad strokes. OP is talking about the number of lonely people across the entire country over time.

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W51976@reddit

London is the same. Don’t be fooled into thinking people will have a bigger network of friends just because they are born and raised here(like I was), or move to the city and try and make friends.

I’m naturally introvert, so it’s always been a struggle for me to connect with more people.

On the flip side, if you are an extrovert who lives in a tiny village of 100 people, they will still find it easier to make more connections in a bigger city.

I believe it’s not just location, it’s how you are as an individual.

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dbxp@reddit

There's no reason the proportion of introverts would increase overtime. This thread isn't about individuals feeling lonely but the increasing figures over time

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Prior_Elephant_5187@reddit

Human interaction in real world situations is dwindling. Everyone I see out walking has headphones in. No chance of light hearted chat. People seem to be happy with texts and SM. It’s quite sad actually.

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Consistent-Pirate-23@reddit

If you ask a boomer then going to the pub every night is the answer.

Then when you have no money “well if you took sandwiches to work you could afford an 18 bed country estate”. Yeah, ok Dave

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yourefunny@reddit

I'm not sure. I am personally very lonely, but that is due to my own fucking shit decisions. My very sociable ex is often organising things with friends. My buddies from school who I still see every few months are often doing things. I live near Newmarket and the races have been on the weekend. Drove through town last night and the high street and all the pubs were rammed. Was in London on Saturday and the place was heaving!!!

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badw0lfy@reddit

I was a social butterfly in my teens, 20s & early 30s. It was the height of clubbing; especially gay clubbing. But I was too into it that it set my career back 20 years and I’m struggling with that now as the industry changed. I had a great time but it came at a cost. I regret everything and nothing.

Life happens, friends drift, and I feel lonely now.

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W51976@reddit

It changes once you hit your mid 20s. I say this and I’m 49.

I don’t see or hear from the 5 or so friends I used to know, because over time, we just drifted, or lost common ground. I don’t even talk to my own family anymore.

Just me and my partner now. I’m content though, as I have so many things to keep me busy.

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madcheco@reddit

I'm 27 and recently out of a relationship and being single again has made me remember how lonely my life actually is and how difficult it is to meet other people my age. I'm not alone, I've always had a small circle of friends but there aren't many opportunities for us to meet up so I do spend nearly all of my time outside work on my own.

The problem is there's seemingly nothing primarily social to actually do, the only third spaces I have are pubs and bars and if you're like me and don't drink, or particularly enjoy being in those kinds of places, then you're screwed.

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