Do you have close friends?
Posted by pimento_mori@reddit | Xennials | View on Reddit | 109 comments
I’m not talking about people you hang out with on occasion, or talk to on socials, I’m talking ride or die. Friends you celebrate life milestones with, are completely comfortable being yourself with, and maybe your families are also close, and can count on each other to drop everything and come help if you’re in a bind. Those kind of friendships. My husband is my best friend and we are obviously very close, but I still feel like I’m really missing that kind of close friendship in my life these days, especially with other women, and I have no idea how to make it happen again, especially now that everyone has their own families and responsibilities.
Is there still hope?
Cisru711@reddit
A couple from childhood or college years. Maybe 1 who would qualify who I met through work as a grownup. I'm a guy though.
My wife has made all sorts of friends as an adult through kid activities, her work, running, and community theater. I don't know how many she would consider close. Could be between 1 and 5.
HappyAndYouKnow_It@reddit
Yes. My best friend and I have been friends since we were 11. We moved away for college together, collected 3 more girls and have been inseparable for over 30 years now. I think the fact that only one of us had children makes a difference though. She’s the one who had the hardest time to balance her family life and get social life and drifted off a little bit. I’m sure we’ll get closer again once her kids are a bit more independent.
Fr4nzJosef@reddit
Only two or three that I would consider like that. One has moved away but he would answer the 0200 phone call and be on his way to help 15 minutes later. I don't get to see any of them as often as I'd like but when we do the time apart doesn't matter.
lcl0706@reddit
Real, drop everything friends? I have one. She lives 1,000 miles away.
Otherwise, no. Not a single one, and I’m also single and live alone. I struggle to connect with people, and everyone I’ve managed to get close to has moved away.
MissAngryBanana@reddit
switheld@reddit
twitter used to be the fucking BEST. I will always hate Elon for ruining it (among many other reasons)
it baffles me how no one has created a decent replacement for it. Reddit is great but it is NOT the same. at all.
Cisru711@reddit
It went downhill a few years before the change. After the ipo, it was only a matter of time.
NiceGuy60660@reddit
I'm also hate all the people who kept using X. Maybe if it had been more abandoned someone would've invested in a copycat and the army of lawyers to defend it.
Ok, not hate, more like briefly annoyed.
bibbityboo2@reddit
I have a soft spot for Twitter - I'm Scottish and it's where I met my American partner, more than a decade ago,, back when it wasn't a Cesspool.
NoKatyDidnt@reddit
I have exactly one. We’ve been friends for about 30 years.
trustme1maDR@reddit
I do. She used to be my roommate in my late 20s and we just became really good friends. We met totally by chance.
My other past close friends are scattered around the world. We are still friends but it's hard to maintain closeness across that kind of distance
albauer2@reddit
Yes, several.
bytebackjrd@reddit
I grew up as a jehovahs witness and then left in my late 30s so that means i lost all my friends and some family. Now in my 40s it is just too hard to make new friends and i don't have the time or really care to start friendships. Just enjoying being strong my wife and kid
Dirtydog693@reddit
I haven’t talked socially to another person for over a year, I’m so fucking lonely
_somelikeithot@reddit
My husband and my sister are those people. I have one close friend, but I don’t think either of us is the other’s first call when something goes south.
nyght2063@reddit
I have a close circle but one ride or die.
Murderbot_420@reddit
No. I did when I was younger.
No_Custard_6481@reddit
I felt the same way until I met my friend. She was speaking loud ( women are usually meek and quiet around here) and with knowledge about things. I heard her and went over to her and started talking to her about music and stuff. She is amazing. We laugh so hard. She’s fiercely loyal and protective and helps me. I call her my voice of reason. We met at habitat for humanity. We go hang out in the plant store and talk to another millennial about music, plants or whatever we feel like talking about. We usually walk the town.
Honestly everyone woman our age is kinda lonely now and is looking for friends again. It takes a little longer for a person to understand you and get you but it’s worth it. Go to a local boutique, plant place( you will meet tons of people there and they will forever help you with your plants). I have “friends “ in the stores I go to. I don’t know. It really helps get through life.
Best wishes!!
braywarshawsky@reddit
I've got 1 "ride or die" friend still. He's awesome. Our wives grew up together and are bestie also, that's how we met. Going on twenty years now.
I consider myself lucky.
-poupou-@reddit
Whenever this comes up in my middle aged people subs, I wonder if having no friends is a social reality for our entire cohort, or just the kind of people who you find on reddit? All my friends are introverts and kind of geeky, so I don't really have a pulse on what the normals are doing.
There is also the so-called "male loneliness epidemic," but on Reddit, women also say they don't have friends, so go figure.
NiceGuy60660@reddit
Lonely male here.
Wife is my best friend and we're happy together, but we moved into a family-friendly town and she was adopted by all the local moms who want nights away from their husbands. They all click & have a blast together, so I'm really happy for her, but stuck feeling like the Ugly Duckling. Of course there's no equivalent dad circle (that I can tell) and tbh I only click about 60% with them anyway. We can hang and have a nice time but one's riding or dying. I really loved one of them, he was awesome but moved away.
Havent kept in great touch with my former friends but trying. It's a bit depressing that I have to force it more than I thought I would tbh.
Guess I shoulda had those kids people seem to enjoy, or else I need to join lots of clubs or something. I volunteer; the people like me but it's not a fun nerdy dudes world. I have work friends who I wish were close but live far.
I didnt type all that for therapy (did I?), but because you asked and I'm definitely in the Mopey Modern Man Club! Sad/glad to hear I'm not alone in that sense, lol.
59apache01@reddit
I read something a while back where it said the mid 30s through the late 50s are the hardest time in life to make new friends. I'm assuming because that's the age range where a lot of people are consumed with work, home, and family responsibilities. A couple of people have told me it gets easier in the 60s. We'll see.
Fickle_Wrangler_7439@reddit
It's a combination of Reddit and high expectations, from what I've seen.
I myself have lots of "friends"- i.e. People I know and can hang out with, but are they that deep connection I had with my friends in high school?
No.
And from what I've seen, very few people have that in adulthood.
MexicanVanilla22@reddit
Yeah. I have coworkers I am friends with, but we don't hang out outside of work. My husband has old friends he still talks to occasionally, but no real friends he sees anymore (old friends are out of state). He complains too, about not having friends, like no buddies to work on the car with him, so I do think there is a modern issue with loneliness, but it's not just men. I don't know how people are supposed to run off and play with friends when we all have so many responsibilities and no one's schedules ever align.
WintryLadyBits@reddit
It’s absolutely not just men. It’s very easy to end up in your 40s with no friends at all. That is my case. Career changes, moving a ton, having small children, ending up with no time to cultivate friendships. Friendships are amazing but they do take work. I have acquaintances but all my relationships are superficial and barely there.
Adrasteia-One@reddit
I only have my 2 best friends from high school, but we are all in different states now. We connect on the phone semi-regularly, but I haven't actually seen them in person in years. I fear that is actually just a common thing in our age group, as someone else pointed out. There is just no time due to life's responsibilities and schedules not aligning.
mamalmw@reddit
Yes. I still have friends from my childhood and teen years. I moved away from my home state almost 20 years ago so my friendship with them has changed but, when time permits, we talk and see each other. When we get together it’s like no time has passed.
As an adult I’ve had friendships come and go. I consider those friends apart of certain chapters of my life. Currently, I have 3 friends who I’ve known for several years. I wouldn’t say they’re my ride or dies but they’re great people and we try to get together at least once a month. We share personal information and can vent to each other. I feel grateful for their friendship bc, as an adult, it’s been difficult to find something more than a superficial friendship.
TheREALBaldRider@reddit
Does my wife count? If not, no.
HearseWithNoName@reddit
They only count if husbands count too, right? As an introvert, I'm pretty happy with what I have anyway
SweatyPalmsSunday@reddit
I used to (spouses don’t count here) but they moved far away and my closest friends have always lived in close proximity to me. Since college, I’ve made friends but I’ve never felt a close connection to anyone.
tenro5@reddit
A few
Spiritual-Style@reddit
No. I have people I can turn to when I need to vent or cry or worry- but they’re only there digitally because I live in a different state and also am terrible with in-person friendships because my neurodivergence lends me to cancel physical meet ups way more than I should. We’ve lived in our current state for 14 months and I have zero friends here. I don’t even have the superficial kind.
Pumperkin@reddit
My dad died unexpectedly in March. A handful of friends appeared at the funeral, equally unexpectedly. I liken it to me saying I was storming the gates of hell, and them showing up with buckets of ice water. It was an amazing gesture. We've held an annual camping trip for several years and it's coming up next month. I cannot wait to see them.
Starship1617@reddit
No, I don’t. I have a hard time connecting with people. It’s always been that way since I was 18.
Subject_Command5442@reddit
Me too. I try to make friends but no one reciprocates. I just assume people don’t like me much so I mostly mind my own business.
59apache01@reddit
One major problem is that we live in an era where the vast majority of people are stuck on themselves.
Amazing-Push-8877@reddit
Same honestly, i think some people are just wired that way and thats okay even if it gets lonely sometimes
karaloveskate@reddit
I don’t even have friends period. Much less ride or die friends.
59apache01@reddit
Just my wife.
My grandfather once told me that if a person can find more than one true friend in their lifetime, they've really accomplished something.
Taanistat@reddit
Yes!
I have the same friend group since freshman year of college. We get together at least once every couple of weeks. Last week we were together, tearing down a large shed and dumpsterizing the remnants. Yesterday we did an escape room and had dinner together to celebrate one of our birthdays. We've been close since 1999.
Junior_Fig_2274@reddit
I do. I have a best friend that I feel closer to than my actual sister. I love her kids and she loves mine. How you find that? Idk we’ve been best friends since college. I’d be lying if I said I knew how to make deep friendships like that outside of the confines of education.
cloudydays2021@reddit
My husband and a friend I’ve had since I was in elementary school are the closest. Then my sibling and a cousin. Then a group of friends who are scattered around the country but we are in contact regularly in a group chat.
AotKT@reddit
Almost every woman I know (myself included) has a strong social network of people she can talk to for support for anything from serious medical issues to divorce to the meaning of life, philosophical/existential questions, ranting about *waves hands at the general world out there*. I've taken a couple single and/or friends whose spouses couldn't make it to their colonoscopies and other surgeries, once literally was lying with my head in a friend's lap, sobbing, in a coffee shop (said friend lives 2 hours away and met me halfway) because of a breakup. That kind of friendship.
I'm an extrovert, nerdy but super social and primarily into various sports, and it's the same across all my interest groups.
How to make it happen? You gotta meet a LOT of women in casual situations to form acquaintanceships and then gradually start introducing deeper conversations as you gauge the level of compatibility and interest. It needs to be in circumstances where you see them regularly. In my case, it's due to my sports as we all work out together at least once a week.
CaptPotter47@reddit
Yes. I have a friend from high school I still talk to several times a month. I have a few friends from college I still see in person at church.
And I have a number of “new” friends that I have made in the last several years that are associated Scouting that I love spending time with.
ThisIsACompanyCar@reddit
I have one. We have been friends since middle school. He is really more like my brother than my friend.
I can’t say our families are friends though, and we haven’t lived in the same city for over 25 years.
sqwiggy72@reddit
I got 4 close friends but I will also say I dont get to see them much anymore we all live different places atleast 1h from myself. Half of us are family men with small kids.
Secret_Elevator17@reddit
I have one ride or die she moved across the country but we still talk frequently and I would get on a plane right now if she even thought she might need me.
Aside from that, our college group of friends has stayed in touch and expanded as we got older and married etc. We are close enough that if they need a random ride to an airport or appointment or help moving something, I'd help. We celebrate birthdays and anniversaries and cancer remissions etc.
I have a looser friendship with them. I'm not texting them to vent about work or the idiot driver that almost killed me. We mostly stay in touch on person or via discord where we have one set up for our friend group with different sections for different chats.
We do travel events and cookouts etc usually a few times a year and get together in smaller groups usually at least once or twice a month for a dinner or movie or board game etc.
Some of the group travels for concerts together, some travel for book events like a romantasy ball, some times we do international trips or cruises. Some take their children or pets on vacations together.
It's just a bigger group that gets along and does things all together and in pairs or smaller groups depending on the event but all of us know we could call anyone in the group for help if it was needed.
I feel extremely lucky to have this bunch and an excited to share an assisted living facility with them. The Mario kart tournaments will be epic.
Professional_Pea1621@reddit
I don't. My husband has close friends going back to his childhood. Their wives and I are cool, but our friendships are not on the same level. Between the group we have 11 kids. 9 are 14 and younger, but 2 are college age. The younger kids all get along with each and it's fun to have big get togethers with all the families. I think that is fine for me. I moved away from my hometown 18 years ago to be with my husband, so I got adopted into his friend group. Sometimes I miss the friends I had in my high school/ college years, but everyone is scattered and I keep busy with our 4 kids. (2, 4, 9, and 11).
Fickle_Wrangler_7439@reddit
Sort of.
I have friends I've known since middle school. We've been through a lot together and that's awesome.
But we've changed a lot too.
I know we'll be there for each other whenever we need.
But someone to actually talk to? Nah, haven't had that for a long time.
LeftHandedGuitarist@reddit
No. I used to up to around the age of 30, but that all faded away.
I did an experiment a few years ago where I decided to not message anyone for a while, as I often do like to check in with friends, and see how often people will spontaneously contact me.
The results were... sobering, let's say.
DoodleDoo1989@reddit
I have my best friend since preschool so over 40 years, our families know each other at this point. I have a couple other really close friends from middle school as well.
genesimmonstongue415@reddit
1 who lives near me. Buds since '90. I call him Cousin & he is in my Living Trust.
Electrical_Gas_517@reddit
I've got a small circle of about 8 friends that fit the description.
genx_meshugana@reddit
I moved to a new city 5 years ago, and aside from friendly chat at work (which is an hour away) I have no friends outside of work. I've tried to connect to like minded folks at events in town (live music, etc) but people here seems really closed off.
If I'm being honest, the last place I lived for 10 years I didn't have a Ride or Die group, either. I've always struggled having a close group. I'm always the add-on.
I wanna try something like Bumble BFF but the last time I tried it kept prompting me for dating stuff.
FoppyRETURNS@reddit
Not anymore. It feels like even family members drifted further away than 20th century friends.
I understand we're all busy and that life has taken us different places, but it feels like my friends feel burdened when I try to keep up with them. At some point I just have to move on.
ghoulthebraineater@reddit
No. They died.
ladyeclectic79@reddit
Nope, never have really. Bullied a ton growing up and friends were never in the cards. I’ve got a hubby who’s my best friend and several folks I’d called close acquaintances, but it’s hard for me to let anyone in enough that they could hurt me when things go south.
avalonfaith@reddit
There's absolutely still hope. I have some very deep connections with fellow people of all labels, especially women. (Worked in women's health care for midwives soooo yeah that tracks) and some I've known since I was 4, some since elementary, some middle, some high school and then some as an actual adult, doing adult things in an adult world. Shit, I even have an adult child! Haha.
I found friends through my job, honestly it was also my passion, I know that's not a thing for everyone so I shall move on. If it happens to be a thing for you, then the conferences, meet ups, little workshops, classes, etc are a great idea.
Next, I love cooking and making bread but I do NOT enjoy baking cakes and the like. Don't come for me! I LOVE Bake Off, I just don't wanna do it. Anywhoooo, cooking some whatever classes or we even had a chef come over to the house (certainly not my apartment. Someone's house by the sea. make a couple rich friends while you're at it 🙈 🤭)
Next, get a ball of yarn? Throw a loop on a hop or a needle, go to whatever stitch & bitch you can find in your area. So fun! Like book club but no weird pretending you read a book. You can literally be a beginner till the end of time. I personally am a bit of a crochet diva so that's not me. I have thrown many a stitch & bitch with the wine and the appetizers and the kids running around like little hoodlums. I think mmmmAaayyybe 3 of use actually crocheted, usually a couple others would lears something and maybe continue. Didn't matter! It was fun lady time.
I am 44 for the record. I made an awesome new but close friend last year. Can you even handle it? I can't I am pretty much on a "no new friends" kick, here I am with a new friend though.
You got this!!! Project what you want, seek out like minded activities and be open when out and about on your normal day
Longjumping_Cream_45@reddit
The friend I have are the ones that have been around for decades. One since grade 8, one since high school, one since college.
Every new friend since has flamed out, even two I thought were "lifers."
RoyalPuzzleheaded259@reddit
I have exactly one friend. I’ve know this dude since middle school. We live about 20 minutes drive from one another and only hang out maybe 2-3 times a year. We text semi-regularly but we both have jobs and families and just don’t have time to hang out. I really wish I had time it would be nice to have friends again.
taleofbenji@reddit
I weirdly revived high school friendships at our 25th reunion (after 25 years of basically talking to none of them), and now those guys are my closest friends.... again!
PolarXnl@reddit
Not counting my wife - no.
Close friendships sort of dissolved over time once we all started families and our priorities changed.
Kyogsa@reddit
Yes and I treasure them. I consider them found family. They've been here for me more than blood relatives.
redditsuckshardnowtf@reddit
None, don't even have aquaintises
Synthetics_66@reddit
The few I had, died overseas while I survived.
Now, I have my wife and another guy who's a best friend and almost like my little brother.
Smaller group of folks I would consider maybe close, but that's it really. The rest are just acquaintances at best.
sakkadesu@reddit
Those are the only friends I have. I used to worry I had so few friends compared to others around me. But I always had this unconscious bar - is this someone who I could call from jail? Now, i see posts like this regularly and realise how lucky I am. we are scattered around the globe and we don’t talk daily or even weekly but if they called or I called, I know we would be there immediately for the other one. Like when my brother died they knew to leave me alone but they were also communicating with my wife regularly to make sure I was okay and asking if they should/could come to the funeral (a long flight for most of them) even though they didn’t know him.
seamonkey420@reddit
oh yea.. my friend circles have shrank quite a bit since my mid 30s. prior to 30s, my friend circle was basically 4 groups of pals that merged so we had up to 40 people at parties at times. but now i'm down to my close childhood buddy and my pal from my college/early work days. see them a few times each month. being the single guy, i'm trying to be their adopted techie uncle (the cool one.. hehe)
Happycatcruiser@reddit
Absolutely! She’s still in my phone as ‘the yin to your yang’ 20 years later. We were friends in high school but drifted apart, reconnected when Facebook was still young and had a blast together in our 30’s. I’m lucky though. I have day to day friends but no one like her. I’m kinda sad not everyone gets the same thing to be honest! I wouldn’t be who I am without her.
Dickrubin14094@reddit
midnight-dour@reddit
I honestly don’t know anymore.
ThatFalafelGirl@reddit
Wow, this thread is really...sad. I did not expect to find this percentage of people without close friends.
I have a lot of friends, and quite a few close ones. For reference points, I'm married without kids. I definitely focus my attention on friends & hobbies vs. work or family.
araisingirly@reddit
Two of them died. 😭
olduglysweater@reddit
Yeah, since the early aughts. Was a witness at their wedding, holidays and dinner, gifts, sole confidants and all that. Friendship was tested when I was encouraged to crash with them and their hubs when I was escaping a shit family situation. They're both painfully autistic and I'm undiagnosed audhd, so after a month being there, the shine and goodwill had rubbed off. We're still good enough for me to dogsit when they go off for Xmas vacation, but I haven't a lot to say to them otherwise, sadly. It just feels awkward.
There's also my ex who's rising in the ranks, he's less introverted and more affable, and it's also been 10 years off and on knowing each other, so we have a history there. We just drink and play boardgames.
ChiefSampson@reddit
The older I got the more I realized I had a vast amount of "associates" versus actual friends. Working in casinos for 30 years you come into contact with a crazy amount of people, and co-workers.
After moving to Vegas I realized true friends were few and far between. Most of the ones out here have died unfortunately. Still have some good ones back east, but I rarely get back there.
switheld@reddit
Of course! We are out there :)
I have a few ride or dies, but i'm single and childfree nearing 50. I'm always looking for solid, stable, consistent, deep friendships - I know that those are the people I will need to count on as I get older, and be a part of my family as my immediate family members pass away/get ill.
It's boring advice but I think community and hobby groups are the best way to make deep friendships. You need an excuse to interact week after week (or month after month) that can eventually grow into seeing each other outside of the group.
TryTwiceAsHard@reddit
Yes, many. I'm a bit of a friend collector. I have many close friends from all walks of my life.
Balthierlives@reddit
My life is all over the place globally so I have freinds in radically different parts of the world.
But I make a point of seeing those freinds when I visit those places. And some of them contact me when they are in town wherever I’m living.
Some of them I text somewhat regularly but most don’t.
Spartan04@reddit
Not really. I had some but like always things changed, usually due to someone moving away or getting married and having kids (I'm single with no kids).
I did actually have a close friend I met through a group I was in. That lasted a few years but then she got married and our friendship kind of drifted apart. When it got to the point where I was always the one to reach out and she never did I gave up.
I miss how easy it was to make friends in college compared to now.
Mudlark2017@reddit
As an adult I have/had 2 good mates as we called them here in Australia. One of them sadly died a couple of years ago with a health issue, the other has became a bit estranged since having a kid. Its the type of friendship where we can not see each other for literally 2 years and it'll just be like we saw each other last week.
Ok-Ad5495@reddit
Do wives and cats count?
HansVonHansen@reddit
No, not anymore. The only one I can call a true friend lives out in Toronto. I moved from there to Dubai 15 years ago and we catch up every now and then. But the demands of life on both parts means that we only get together online very rarely.
NemaCat@reddit
I’ve become really close with 3 ladies I call my “old lady squad.” They’re in their 70s, we do matinee movies and game nights, they’re the fuckin best. When they come over, they clean up after themselves, and leave early. They were all there for me when I got sick a few years ago, they’re the best. Go get some senior besties, highly recommend
Daylight-Silence@reddit
Not really. They all got married. Mazel tov
AjaxInsane@reddit
Yes. My wife and I have several sets of friends (all couples, some with kids, some without) most we've known for ages, and we all hang out and get drunk a few times per year. We also plan at least one trip per year, whether it be camping or a cabin to spend a long weekend... The trick, we've found, is to reconnect with people you liked back in the day and frame it as "Hey, I miss having you around." A college roommate and their spouse may become surprise besties. You'll never know unless you put yourselves out there, even if it's a little bit at a time.
SimpleVegetable5715@reddit
Nope. I went through a major bout of depression in my 20’s and my friends said I’m pretty much not fun at parties anymore. What a shallow lot.
fermentedradical@reddit
No, it's quite lonely aside from my partner and old ones far away. COVID seems like it really obliterated being able to find and keep new friends like that, plus being in our 40s doesn't help.
FunksGroove@reddit
I do. My friend group has been friends since we were barely teenagers. We chat every day and hang out multiple times a month.
FunksGroove@reddit
I also have another group of 2 guys that we met when were like 4 or 5 years old and still text and hang out at least a few times or more each year.
jennyobo@reddit
No. My family moved around when I was a teen, and I've struggled with friendships ever since. It hurts less as I've gotten older.
KalaKitty@reddit
My spouse and two others. That has always been the way of it for me. No more than three people that I can & will talk with on the daily.
jackfaire@reddit
My best friend let me become his roommate and it's life altering.
JamesMattDillon@reddit
I have friends of course, but hardly any close friends. The few that I do consider to be close friends, I don't know if they are or not.
BlindMouse2of3@reddit
No
ineffable_my_dear@reddit
I do. One is my best friend from high school and the others I’ve only known for about 6 years. Unfortunately we don’t live near each other but I know if I needed any of them they’d be here. And I would trust any of them to raise my kid if it came to it.
Affectionate_Ask_769@reddit
I do but they are friends I made in middle school and high school.
HuckleberryLogical63@reddit
Met my best friend freshman year, we live a few blocks from each other, hang out almost every weekend, and text on pretty much a daily basis. Absolutely ride or die homies, we have helped each other out countless times over the years and know where all the bodies are, figuratively speaking.
LunaticMuse@reddit
Nah. SO, but that's different than being a friend, yea?
Moved to another country, lost pretty much all acquaintance-ships (that were apparently pretty superficial anyway). Had a few friends overseas -- talk to one every day, but haven't seen him in years. Another passed away suddenly about a year and a half ago, and I'm still not all right with it. Been estranged from Dad's family most of my life. Don't talk to Mom's side -- not since both my parents died.
Yea, I have no idea how to make friends. Yea, I feel like I'm missing out on something, too. Honestly, being child-free by choice (as a woman) makes it so much harder, too.
If I had to name my best friend, it'd be my dog. She's sweet, and amazing, and kind, knows when I need a shoulder to cry on, and there is no better feeling than knowing there's a new toy on the way, and she's going to smile the day away, extra-big.
(Also, your user name is GREAT, LoL)
echochilde@reddit
Yeah. No one that I really see all the time, but there’s a handful of people I’ve known most of my life along with a few I’ve picked along the way who I know would come running in the middle of the night if I needed them. And visa versa. I ran out of family with parents and grandparents all gone, didn’t have any siblings, so I feel lucky I have some kick ass chosen family.
Sanchastayswoke@reddit
No, I don’t. Well, my high school ride or dies we still text/call every week or so. But they live hundreds of miles away & I’m actually feeling very lonely lately.
SweatyWoodpecker3927@reddit
Yes. Met them all once I was an adult and had moved to a new area post-college. Don’t speak to anyone from HS and only one person from college. I met most of these people in my 20s but they are all friends for life.
-poupou-@reddit
Exact same. Although now that I'm inching toward 50, and having experienced the world as it's been since about 2017, some combination of maturity/lacktherof and stress seems to be eating away at the cohesion of these relationships. It's actually very disorienting.
Rubik842@reddit
Most of mine died. Others drifted away or I pulled away from as they changed or failed to change. I have one left, apart from my wife.
pushdose@reddit
Maybe one other person besides my wife I can talk to about my bullshit. Plenty of acquaintances, work and hobby friends, but real friends? Nah. Mostly my fault. People tried to stay in my life, I just couldn’t. It’s too much work
StillhasaWiiU@reddit
4, one i've known since 7th grade.
Ultimate-Flexionator@reddit
I had some. It's basically over. I can remote connect with a few people who I communicate with, and I'm lucky enough to have family.
SensitiveArtist@reddit
I have a few. One I've known since first grade and his mom is like my other mom. He loves in a different state now bit we keep in touch and hang out whenever he's in town. My other best friend passed away recently but we hung out all the time.
My_11th_Account@reddit
One
bloodectomy@reddit
Yeah I've got some of those :) some are guys I went to high school with and with whom I've remained close, others are more recent friends that I met when we were all recent college graduates working at our first "real" job.
One of the worst things about aging is how much harder it is to make new friends and have them be lasting friendships. The most recent friends my wife and I made we actually met at a winery and we hit it off over our opinions on olives, of all things. We've met some of their friends in turn but haven't really clicked with any of them (they're all fine folks, just not our vibe)
Helo7606@reddit
I have 5 very close friends. 1 being a friend I've had since I was 15. We all don't get to see each other as much as we like. But we always try when we can. All of us will go out of our way to help each other.