What is with school drop off?

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OldSlug@reddit

In my city you’re not guaranteed to be assigned to your nearest public school and even if you are they’ve closed so many that the closest is often miles away. School buses aren’t a thing anymore. The high schools have dedicated city bus lines but they still require a ridiculously long long walk for lots of kids, and the rest of the bus system is abysmal.

I imagine it’s the same in some other cities as well.

Hope that helps!

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imalloverthemap@reddit

It is such a huge waste of human and petroleum resources, I just can’t comprehend. I never had kids, but I would’ve lost my mind with school pick up and drop off. This and overly involved school/club sports makes me glad for my decision.

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GodsCasino@reddit

As a 50F, no kids, when other women ask me if I have kids and I say no, and they give me a condescending smirk and ask me why (I assume they want me to say I'm infertile or something) I always just downplay it and say something like "the time was never right" but what I really want to say is "because I'm smart".

Sorry, no offense if you have kids. But yes offense if you look at me like I'm a loser if I tell you I don't have kids.

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moooeymoo@reddit

55 here, no kids. I give no Fs and just say I never wanted kids. Period.

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SillyNluv@reddit

Oh, fuck them. I had three children very late in life and I don’t understand how anyone who has had children could act like such assholes. I came out the other end of that journey more adamantly pro choice than I was before I started.

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GodsCasino@reddit

I had a friend - repeat HAD - who had 8 kids. One day she asked me if I was jealous of her for being so fertile. I had to bite my tongue so hard to not ask her if she was jealous of me for being so smart to not have kids.

You’re aware not all states/ cities/towns are the same.
Thank you for the condescending attitude though.

HeyKrech@reddit

When our kids were younger, our house was half a block too close to the school to get bussing. We could pay for before school childcare and drop them off early or just teach them to tuck and roll as much as possible as we made it to the front doors in the drop off line.

Buses don’t run even in my district within 1/2 mile of school. But if you let your young person “walk home alone” you are irresponsible and they will be snatched by a random kidnapper.

If you live further out but your child does extracurricular activities at the school, you may still need to pick them up if the after school bus runs earlier than their extracurricular activity.

And that was how it was in the 80s it’s only gotten worse from there

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cnidarian_ninja@reddit

Ours are a FIVE mile radius. Super frustrating.

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doryllis@reddit

Seriously no child is walking 5 miles in this modern age. I’m sad for us.

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turtleandhughes@reddit

A lot has changed since you were walking to school in 2nd grade. You don’t need to “get it” or have experienced it yourself for it to now be more of the norm. Society changes with time.

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NaughtyLittleDogs@reddit

My house is just far enough from school to make my kids ineligible to ride the bus but just far enough to make walking impractical, especially in the winter. So I drive them. It is what it is.

This sounds like how it should work. A reliable bus system with good drivers and an app for tracking takes so much stress off parents.

Neurodivergent child, consequences don’t mean anything to them.

What makes you think we haven’t gone through that already? There’s some kids who intentionally antagonize their parents to get a dopamine hit off of their actions.

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QuietVisit2042@reddit

Interesting that you originally described them as lazy and stubborn.

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high_everyone@reddit

Yeah, well, it doesn’t change the medical diagnosis and their actions have become habit to them.

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saki4444@reddit

If they can form habits, then give them a chance to form the habit of getting themselves to school.

I’m neurodivergent myself, and while I know that we’re not all alike, and I did struggle quite a bit in early adulthood, I had a lot of independence skills up my sleeve. Like yeah I dropped out of college pretty much right away, but I also knew how to support myself so I never moved back into my parents’ house. And it’s not like they weren’t there for me - but they made it clear that they were only willing to financially support me in adulthood if I was a full time student. I knew they were going to keep their word so i was financially on my own and I rose to the occasion.

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high_everyone@reddit

We're still struggling with forming habits. Dirty armpits, rarely brushed teeth and frequently not wearing clean clothes when attempting to leave the house. We've even tried monetizing it for them and they still lie about it.

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saki4444@reddit

Seriously. This is just setting them up for failure. Who will make them go to school/work once they’re on their own?

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high_everyone@reddit

They’re a saint to people they interact with day to day, they’re intentionally targeting their parents and authority figures with their choices and actions.

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Turbulent-Quarter-27@reddit

And the adults in the room owe them more than just throwing their hands up and using "neurodivergence" as an excuse.

Ask any therapist or counsellor- disability is not an excuse for bad behaviour.

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high_everyone@reddit

https://www.mayoclinic.org/diseases-conditions/oppositional-defiant-disorder/symptoms-causes/syc-20375831

It is when their behavior is the disability. It is hard enough to do this as a parent, so we have given the school notice of the issue so they can let us know if they ever see the same things we do at home.

Be really glad you don't have to deal with this. It's nearly cost my parents their relationship with me because for a LOOOONG time they thought it's something I'm doing wrong.

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Turbulent-Quarter-27@reddit

Ok fair, some kids have a diagnosis but not all of them.

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high_everyone@reddit

I’m not gonna wade into how other people raise their kids. Mine is an active grenade with no pin trying to shake the trigger with every step we take.

I picked up my kids all through elementary school. The transportation department was awful and ran busses short. Because our neighborhood was closest to the school, our route was last. This meant the driver did one drop off route before our kids. They would often get home an hour+ after school ended. After school activities were difficult to schedule because of this.

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justbrowzingthru@reddit

In addition to the school drop off line,

There’s also the school bus stop line.

All the suvs line up so there kids wait in the suv at the bus stop till the bus comes.

Then when they get home in the suv,

1) my kids’ school has no big orange buses. 2) it is 4 miles from our home in an urban environment. 3) even with all that, they (4th and 6th grades) take the city bus home, which involves changing buses 2/3 of the way home. It can take almost an hour. (Shout out to our city buses tho, seriously those drivers are awesome humans) So we do drive them in the morning because mornings suck. 4) I too took the bus from kinder through senior year. I remember walking to the bus stop as a first grader with my brother, a kindergartner, his name and teacher’s name safety pinned to his coat. But I also lived in an area that had no other infrastructure. So. 🤷🏻‍♀️

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Leinad0411@reddit

I took myself to school, to home, to activities. I’m alive. Therefore, idk.

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DeadWolf7337@reddit

Is walking to school not a thing anymore?

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Sillygoose1979@reddit

Depends on the roads the kids have to cross. I don’t trust drivers not to see little ones, even in the crosswalk on 135th.

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Extension-Pepper-271@reddit

Back when I was a kid, we walked, but most of the elementary schools were in neighborhoods. The elementary school near me is at the intersection of two major streets. Three lanes each way with a 45 mph speed limit (and what that usually means is the slowest traffic is going 45 mph)

There is no attempt to make that intersection crossable for children - no reduced speed limit during school hours, no crossing guard. Probably because no parent in their right mind would let their kid walk across those streets alone.

The result is that mornings and afternoons have huge lines of cars for drop-off and pick-up.

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whateverhappensnext@reddit

I was in elementary school, primary school in the UK, in the 70s and yep, we walked and got picked up by ourselves and got dropped off at school. However this is not the 70s any more.

My kid is now 20, but when he was in elementary school I dropped him off. I didn't wait in the line, we would park and I'd walk him to school.

Middle school I did the drop-off drive-by as their wasn't buses.

Highschool, he had the bus and used that until he could drive.

I don't hold anything against parents for the younger kids, but definately think the kids need to transition to be more independent as they mature through the system.

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Tough_Ad6387@reddit

Really. They have to watch their darling go into the building. I’d have died of embarrassment if my folks ever did this to me.

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KangarooSad4251@reddit

I drop off and pick up my Freshman. But that is because I am a pushover and my dd said “please don’t make me be a ‘bus rider’ in high school. Only the dorky high school kids ride the bus” and I work from home and it takes me a grand total of 15 min in the morning and 15 min in the afternoon.

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Illustrious_Wolf_127@reddit

I too grew up in the 70’s-80’s and I either walked or biked to and from school except when I commuted by school bus or on local trains (in Japan). Back then we had to lug around those heavy hardcover textbooks too - I thought they were a form of child torture! My high school was at least a couple of miles away

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expespuella@reddit

As an 8 year old girl in the 80s, I walked to school a quarter mile away in a high traffic not great part of a huge city.

It's actually pretty rare for a school to not have any transportation. Some schools won't bus kids within a mile because theoretically they can walk.

I live in a city where all the schools have bus services, but (especially in the suburbs or well off neighborhoods) everyone drives their kids because they think they're too precious to get on a bus.

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Creamy_Frosting_2436@reddit

Depending on where you live, there are no buses 🚌 to ride to school. That wasn’t an option for me. My mom drove me and my siblings to school each morning and picked us up when school ended. She never came early for pickup. I drove my kids to and from school as well because I never wanted them on the school buses. Riding the school buses would have required them to be at the bus stop 45 minutes before they left home as car riders, and they would have arrived home about 45 minutes later than I could get them home. Add to this, there seemed to be some drama on the buses 1-2 times a month. No, thank you. I’d rather they ride in my car, fastened in seatbelts, and not subjected to waiting for a school bus in all kinds of weather. Yes, sometimes, I got in the car line early, turned off my engine and read books or played games on my phone while I waited. Other days, I waited until 8 minutes after dismissal and drove straight through the pickup area without having to wait in a long line. My kids, my choice.

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Breklin76@reddit

In our district, 6th graders don’t get a bus. Sure 5th graders do. 7th graders do. Not my boy who’s still 11 but a 6th grader. So I drive him.

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SnowblindAlbino@reddit

In my state they have closed many schools over the last 30 years, consolidating them to ever larger ones. As a result, they are farther from where people live. As a kid in the '70s, I walked to school first through seventh grades, sometimes 10 or 15 minutes, sometime a few blocks.

PC_L0AD_LETTER_WTF@reddit

Us later Gen x kids' parents started showing the first signs of what would evolve into the helicopter parents.

We were raised by late boomers that started seeing the faces of missing kids on milk cartons, posters in the post office and grocery stores.

Also, the beginning of the 24 hour news cycle which filled the time with fear inducing editorials that dropped it's focus on local news and included stories from across the country. Then there were shows like , Unsolved Mysteries, 60 minutes, Cops, and 48 Hours. That fed the fear machine even further.

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Big_Parfait6268@reddit

Class of 1995. I walked to school with sibs or neighbor kids from elementary age until partway through seventh grade, when some busybody moms made my mom feel like she was doing something wrong “because there had been a flasher nearby.” Then I was forced to get driven for the rest of middle school. I had always valued that time on the walk home to decompress after my school day, buy a treat from the corner store, or just chat with friends. I was really sad to lose that freedom.

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Rusty_Empathy@reddit

We live 1 mile away from my kid’s school so it’s too close to be offered bus service.

However, the route would take my son down a four lane highway with multiple intersections so it isn’t safe for a young child to walk. When I was working, I’d drop him off and then go to work. In the evening, I’d leave work and pick him up from the after school program.

It’s not until 5th grade that I’ve felt comfortable enough letting him ride his bike on his own. Kids are sheltered nowadays. My son lacks situational awareness as kids don’t go out as a pack anymore riding bikes around the neighborhood. It took two years of me going out and riding with him to get him to the point where I was confident he’d actually STOP and LOOK at 4 way intersection.

Additionally, After the huge amount of boomer kids and how small our generation was, they started closing schools. Kids don’t live in the same neighborhood as their school a lot of the time anymore and with suburban sprawl built for cars vs. bikes / pedestrians a lot of parents are just driving their kids.

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MrsTruffulaTree@reddit

My kids go to school in the same school district as I did. Things are different now. In elementary school (.25 miles away), I walked. In middle school, I took the school bus. In high school, I took public transportation. We live 3 miles away from the schools we are zoned for. School buses are only for SpEd students. Public transportation can take up to 45 mins and requires a transfer which can cause delays. I was a SAHM until my youngest started school. I had to choose a job that still allowed me to take my kids to & from school. We are in CA.

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I don't mind, it's not that many days (maybe 20 per year.) The kid is super cool; I actually look forward to the days when I do pick up! But I just thought the no bus policy was odd. It would literally be the SHORTEST RIDE - like 10 minutes max. And they have friends in the neighborhood who ride it, so they wouldn't be alone

Sometimes I can't pickup due to a zoom meeting. So mom calls around to find another parent. If the kid could ride the bus, they could just come to my house. Usually the other parent just brings the kid to my house anyway. (I leave the door open so they can just walk it without disrupting my meeting.)

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Turbulent-Quarter-27@reddit

This just isn't true. Despite what the algorithms tell you, your kids have never been safer.

You know what is unsafe? Being afraid of the world and driving them every.

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Formal-Test5829@reddit

Karen? Is that you?

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drivingthelittles@reddit

I drive a school bus in a small town Ontario, Canada. Junior kindergarten to grade 12 students.

I have parents who insist their high school kids (grade 9-12) be picked up at their door because it’s too dangerous for them to walk to the community bus stop that is 2 blocks from their house. The company accommodates a lot of these requests because the parents are relentless and it’s easier to give in.

I have a 15 year old girl who wears small skirts and bare legs in the winter when it’s -35 degrees Celsius, the bus never really warms up on those days. Her mother came out to the bus, I’m sitting there completely bundled up along with a blanket around my snow pants covered legs and she asks me if I could please turn the heat up because little Sara is cold. I thought, bitch, do you think I’m dressed like this because I didn’t want to turn up the heat??? Instead I smiled through my scarf and said, the heat is on full blast, I would humbly suggest that bare skin in February is a bad choice. She called the company to complain but there is no fix for this so we couldn’t accommodate her.

The kids are awesome, some of the parents are the real bane of my existence.

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Anonphilosophia@reddit

Ha - I was that girl, my father used to say "Being cute will get you sick." He hated when I did that (though I did wear leg warmers because, you know, the 80's!)

I wouldn't have DREAMED of asking someone to turn up the heat.

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BlueFalcon02@reddit

School doesn’t provide a bus within 2 miles. I drop off in the morning so kid can get sleep instead of having to wake up early enough to leave before 7. Hire someone to pick him up in the afternoon so he get home in time to do homework before either afternoon activities (sports) or playing with friends.

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Own_Celebration5462@reddit

We lived too close for the bus and too hot to walk during a good part of the school year (Phoenix). I absolutely loved dropping my son off and picking him up. We got to connect and talk twice a day with no distractions. He’s in high school now and takes the bus. I miss it.

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damageddude@reddit

Because of where we live we didn't drive our children to school. But we did drive our children to activities. My wife called it "hostage" time, where they had to talk to us.

superflippy@reddit

This. We lived about a mile from the elementary school but there was no safe way to walk there.

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ancientastronaut2@reddit

There were times my kids took the bus (but you had to buy a pass for the year which I want to say was $300+).

But if I did drive them, I avoided that stupid line like the plague and dropped them down the street a bit. (It was in a residential neighborhood).

What was also dumb is you weren't allowed to drop them off more than 15 min before the bell, and sometimes I needed to a bit before that when I was working, so they'd hang out nearby in the neighborhood, loitering in front of someone's house.

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PhiloLibrarian@reddit

My kids walk to school or walk to the bus stop…

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Turbulent-Quarter-27@reddit

People read all sorts of stuff online about how unsafe the world is, and convince themselves sitting in an idling SUV is the safest way to make sure your kids come home from school safely.

Other excuses I've heard from fellow parents "it's cold outside."

In our school district we have two main reasons for this.

First, buses in our district are only for kids with special needs and have it indicated in their IEP. They do door to door pick up and drop off.

Second, most kids don't go to their home schools anymore. The four high schools in my city each have different focuses. One is the arts high school, one is sports, one is advanced education, and the last is for the kids that do better in a virtual classroom. This helps funding get better focused to the schools that need them.

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CodenameZoya@reddit

Neither of these very odd examples relate to any place I’ve lived. I can’t believe they don’t have buses where you live. That’s crazy. What city do you live in? I want to do an Internet search. Second of all that situation with your high schools must be rare because every place I’ve lived in you have to go to the nearest public school. So that might be adding to your pick up drop off situation but not everybody’s.

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PC_L0AD_LETTER_WTF@reddit

I'm in Southern California. Our district has magnet schools and uses a "school of choice" system. My son is autistic and has to be enrolled in the school that houses the moderate to severe class so he doesn't really get a choice. I live across the street from an elementary school but I was able to enroll my daughter in the the same school as her brother. The bus situation is because of the school budget cuts.

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brergnat@reddit

No buses in our CA district except for special education students. Many elementary kids COULD walk to school, but many are zoned for schools over 2 miles away along busy roads. Most middle and high school students in our district live greater than 3 miles from the school. Our city is pretty large and spead out but also densely populated.

My kids rode their bikes to elementary and middle school but had to bus to HS (they are special ed students). The HS was a 15 minute drive away.

A lot of kids now ride their e bikes, which is a whole other issue.

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RedJeepPurpleKayak@reddit

My kids are 30 now but this was our situation, also in CA. Zoned for school across town, no buses provided.

MienaLovesCats@reddit

As a parent of 2; 17 & 21; in Saskatchewan 🇨🇦; I say... Here parents have to pay fees to have their high schools ride the school bus. It takes a long time to get home on the school bus. While driving each way; minus the carpool wait; is 3 to 15 minutes; unless you live out of the town/ city. School busses don't run; if the weather is -40 or colder. Yet schools are open if roads have been plowed of snow. Most importantly; most parents do it; if they are physically able to and have the time to.

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Feeling-Visit1472@reddit

I just know this is my thin blood talking, but how often is it -40° outside that it’s considered still reasonable to attend school?

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MienaLovesCats@reddit

🤣 20 to 50 days each winter. With windchill; it can feel like -50 occasionally. We usually get our 1st snowfall mid October to mid November. We often get our last snowfall in April; occasionally in May. Last weekend we got a huge snowstorm. I'm so glad we hadn't gotten around to switching our minivan's tires; from winter tires; to all season tires.

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Feeling-Visit1472@reddit

Oh my goodness, that is brutal! Serious question, how is that even manageable? Like do you have to wear balaclavas to even be outside? I think the absolutely coldest I’ve ever personally experienced would be maybe -10. Maybe. I remember when I lived in Baltimore and we had a spell of -3 and it was so miserable. Granted, I also lived in a loft with an exposed brick wall at the time, which made it extra un-fun to cope with.

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MienaLovesCats@reddit

People stay warm IF they are dressed "properly" for the weather. Our winter weather is actually not unusual; look at places like Alaska ect.

In Australia there is no designated bus services for kids- when we were kids - we just walked - now - FARK, no one walks and minimum kids get busses. It is nuts - we live in an area where there are a number of private schools - all the freaking Porsche cars that idle in our street waiting for the baby boys (secondary school so 13+) is crazy…..

Our daughter went to a private school for secondary, from her first week we took her on the bus and educated her on how to get on and off and pay etc, and then for 5 years we were done, she still made it to all her extra curricular activities etc and it was a life lesson- I don’t get why other parents aren’t teaching their children about public transport and ensuring they can use it - does my head in…..

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Anonymo123@reddit

around here you can "choice" into schools not close to you. So a lot of parents have to drive their kids and pick them up as they live outside the school bus route. Thats what we do, its not a huge deal but its a bit of a PITA. Some parents drive an hour to drop their kids off, its insane.

"back in my day" my dad left for work at 6 and my mom before my bus came..so if I missed my bus it was a 3 or 4 mile walk across farm fields and 2 stream crossings to get to school in rural MN. I would never think to call my mom for a ride and my dad would be super pissed, so I would just walk. Never missed the ride home, especially in the winter.

No one is expecting children to walk on highways in the dark. People are criticising SUVs in suburban areas where walking is an option.

damageddude@reddit

We were near the first/last stop in HS. My son did his HW and my daughter either read or socialized on the rides.

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damageddude@reddit

I grew up in NYC. It was basically walk or a bus/subway pass once into middle school (at least in my part of the city).

I live in NJ and depending on the town most suburban school districts have a robust school bus system. Some towns have distantce requirements for middle schools (high school district is regional so many need bus or car). The only times I remember dropping off/picking up my children, especially in HS, was if they had clubs before or after the regular school days. The traffic could be harsh in the morning.

There was one time I drove my son and a few kids at his stop to the 6th grade school when the bus didn't show, there was a dropoff line but nothing crazy.

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For Middle School. Bus pick up is an hour before school. School starts at 7:30. I’m promoting mental and physical health by dropping off on my way to work. Also sports afterschool doesn’t provide transportation. We live in a city. Many miles between home, school and activities.

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drewcandraw@reddit

A lot of parents drop their kids off at school on their way into the office because it works for their family.

Some schools don’t have a school bus program. They’re not cheap to operate and it’s a line item in the budget among the first to get cut.

School buses are big and it requires more than one to serve the student body. The elementary school nearest our house, for example, is on a one-way residential street and does not have the parking lot space to accommodate school bus drop-offs and pick-ups. Families not within walking or biking distance to the school can either drive or put their kid on a city bus, which for students in the district is free.

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jednaz@reddit

A lot of school districts have open enrollment, which means they accept students outside district borders. They have to do so in order to keep schools open. Those kids do not get bus service to their neighborhood. Sometimes the district will provide a bus to the edge of the district boundary to collect those students from a stop they can drive to.

This is very common in sports now - there is no district transportation so if your event is at a different location, the kid's gotta get there somehow.

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dr_police@reddit

My kids go to private school. No bus.

They go to private school because the local public school, which used to be among the best in the state, has been forced to cut funding for all extracurriculars and bus service because boomers and elder Gen X folks don’t want to pay for schools.

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LordBalderdash@reddit

"Conservatives".

My kid goes to school a 15min drive away, and will throughout middle/high school. He’d have to get up an hour earlier to catch a bus a mile away (which would be fine to walk, just a lot of time in the morning), and he says the bus kids are always late to class.

Nobody in my house is a morning person. The bus runs 45 minutes before I have to have my kids at school. Sitting in the dropoff line for 5 minutes is totally worth not having the battle each morning to get out the door before the bus shows up.

Plus that extra time with the kids is really nice. For whatever reason, it's one of the few times in a day they'll talk about anything without being self conscious.

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irishihadab33r@reddit

Same, mornings are rough. My kiddo does ride the bus in the afternoon, though.

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Beneficial-Seesaw568@reddit

People in my neighborhood which is less than 3/4 mile end to end drive to the bus stop to pick their kids up and drive them home. Same kids who actually play outside all day long running all over the neighborhood. It doesn’t make a lick of sense.

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Morgenacht@reddit

The school is probably requiring an on-file adult be present before they let the kid off the bus.

paypermon@reddit

We drop our daughter off in the morning because she would have to get up an hour earlier to catch the bus and I woukd rather she get the extra rest. We don't mind from the driveway to her getting out at the school its 5-8 minutes. She rides the bus home because pick up is a huge waste of time

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This is an attention-seeking post, right?

The world has changed since we were kids. Limited funding for busses, much longer routes, not to mention the insanity that occurs on busses. I don't get why OP doesn't realize these changes have happened.

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XennialPrime@reddit

I'll simply drop my own perspective.

I haven't really been around kids since I was one myself. I don't have kids. My friends don't have kids.

When you approach 50, you realize you haven't been around kids in 30 years.

So... a person like me... I simply no longer have relevant experience in topics regarding the everyday life of a child that are not memories.

I actually thought "Hey... yeah!" when I read the thread title. I felt a pang of "Why do they do that stuff?"

Reading the responses makes sense to me, but I haven't lived what I am reading.

This make any sense? TL-DR: Some of us old maids may actually be ignorant of the topic.

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New_Discussion_6692@reddit

Do you also not realize things have changed since we were kids?

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XennialPrime@reddit

So you just want to take shots at folks?

I'm honestly asking. Is your snark your actual reaction to what I wrote? Or were you just trying to be wry at a stranger's expense?

It's not hard to suss out.

I'm never around kids or the culture of caring for them.

It stands to reason I might not "get" the curb pick-up culture, ne?

I learned or was reminded of things by other posters.

That's all.

5 minutes late is the ideal arrival time for car line!

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Arachnikat@reddit

When I was in school (public, K-12), my parents couldn’t drive me because they had to work. They left before I got on the bus and I was a latchkey kid. They had to pay the school a few hundred dollars every year to pick me up. We lived about 5 miles from the school and I was on the bus two hours every day - first one on and the last one off.

Believe it or not, it was even worse when I had practice after school and they DID pick me up. If practice ran late, my parents acted like it was my fault because they had to pick me up and 5 miles each way was just too much to handle after a long day of work, especially if they had to wait a few minutes longer.

Even after I got my drivers license and we had a car that I could use, my parents wouldn’t ever let me drive to school. It was so embarrassing to ride the bus home on my very last day of school.

Anyway, all this is to say that it seems like in time I’ve met more parents who genuinely like to spend time with their kids, and if parents are driving their kids to/from school because it gives them more opportunity to spend time with them and be in their lives then I think waiting in line would be worth it. Obviously that’s not always the case but if it is, that would be a great thing.

What’s sad to me is that a lot of those kids probably have no idea what it’s like to not have their parents transport them and they take it for granted.

This post is written weirdly…

No school bus option. And traffic takes almost 20 mins driving so we walk 8 mins. We cross an expressway so I’ll be walking him past 2nd grade.

Yeah, in my district there is no bus transportation for kids who live within 3 miles of the school. Kids who live close by walk or ride their bikes. I am just on the edge of that boundary but it’s too far for my kids to walk or bike. Plus I’m in a pretty large suburb and they’d have to cross a major, busy, thoroughfare. There’s also a shortage of bus drivers, so in some areas there’s not enough room on the buses for all the kids.

My kids do what I did. Walk their ass to the bus 😂

But… I also think the millennial generation helicopters their kids and are fearful of whatever freak tragedy could occur. They worry and stress about EVERYTHING. Gen Z too. According to them, AI will kill is all and they are in therapy over it.

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coach_wargo@reddit

Here in Indiana we've cut school funding so much that some districts have had to eliminate bus service.

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NoeTellusom@reddit

I went to elementary school in NY - unless there was an epic ton of snow and ice, my ass was walking, biking or taking the bus. My parents worked and weren't available to drive us around, but wouldn't have otherwise - my aunt walked us to the bus stop most mornings. Middle school I rode a bike 5 miles round trip. High school I took the bus or drove. I cannot even begin to understand how modern parents work - we KNOW kids need less screen time, we KNOW they need more excercise, but here we are - kids being chauffeured to school.

Our elementary/middle school district is geographically small and there is a boundary for where kids are provided bussing versus considered walkers. It ends up being about 2/3 of a mile. I know parents that drive/pick up their kids every day that live within just a few blocks. It feels crazy to me. We are about 2 blocks away and my kids walked. My youngest will occasionally ask for a ride and I literally laugh - like it will take longer for us to get in the drop off line than for her to just walk. I do understand as a working parent that it may be easier to just drop them off in the morning if it lines up with work schedules and we are in the Midwest, so in particularly bad weather, I also understand but to sit in that afternoon pick up line on the daily?? It’s not for me. For high school, my kids take the bus. We are extremely lucky that our district even has two “activity” bus schedules that run after sports practices are done so even with afterschool activities, they take the bus.

I will also say that generally I do respect a “you do you” but the pick up/drop off does actually impact our neighborhood. You wouldn’t believe the number of parents that drop their child off and then hit the gas and barely stop at stop signs 🙄 or that park illegally, blocking traffic to wait for their kid.

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InviteAcceptable6662@reddit

My kindergartner was being bullied by mean girls. She is one of the kindest, most positive kids I know. I don’t want her to have to start (or end) her school day with kids who make themselves feel better by shitting on younger, more vulnerable kids

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South_Friendship2863@reddit

I see a lot of kids waiting for the bus to middle school sitting in Mom’s car, not sure why. Elementary school pickup was like a competition, who is first in line. Some of the moms must sit in the car for an hour just so they can be first in line.

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PotatoesPancakes@reddit

I still see school buses but they stop at every house and wait for the kid to come out. At least where I live. It was quite a shock seeing it for the first time.

In the 80's, all the kids on the block are gathered in the corner and the bus will leave without you even if they see you running. Looking back, that's not good thing but that's the way it was. Then you need to walk to school if your parents can't drive you for some reason.

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swaggering_yak@reddit

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1crbngrp@reddit

We live ~3 blocks from what used to be the middle school for 6th-8th grades. When my 3 oldest went there, they walked. The bus would have come to our house and picked them up. It did for some of the neighbor kids. I just didn't see the point. My kids liked walking. Once, one of their friends wanted to come over after school to work on a project. When I spoke with the kid's dad, he insisted on picking up my one child and his child and driving them the 3 blocks himself because, "a lot can happen in 3 blocks." He apparently couldn't care less what happened to my other 2 kids in that time.

After a new middle school was built, that building became the upper elementary for 2nd-4th graders. This happened just in time for my youngest to start 2nd grade there. He, also, walked to and from school. I walked with him the first few weeks but he loved walking too and eventually insisted on going alone.

I guess that kid's dad was right. A lot can happen in 3 blocks. My kids learned to navigate in our town. They learned how to be safe around vehicles. They learned independence and self reliance. The older ones learned how to look out for each other.

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Lobster70@reddit

When I think of my kids (all in their 20s now) walking the route I walked in elementary school, I shudder. Especially as first or second graders! I just checked Google Maps, and it's 0 4 miles. I guess times changed.

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radioactivecat@reddit

My kid and I live half a mile from the school so we bike or walk almost every day unless we are running super late. Busing starts at 1 mile.

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NvGable@reddit

I walked a mile to school, for about 10 years. I know it was a mile, I googled it now.

All these reasons people are listing to this post are valid reasons to drive their children, but I also add this happens, because no one wants to fix problems. A band-aid society.

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Correct-Condition-99@reddit

My wife wanted me to drive the boys to school. I refused. The bus picked them up right in front of our house. She drove them for about a month, and then decided the bus wasn't so bad.

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lilred7879@reddit

I agree with your sentiment but being a grand parent I can tell you what has happened and it is not Parents desiring this.

In the last few years to save money our local school system has changed the distance from school they offer busing from. 1/2 mile to 2 miles.

So if you live within 2 miles of your school you no longer can catch a bus and I sorry but 2 miles is a long walk...so parents have to get them there and pick them up

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Harbinger_Kyleran@reddit

I'm 68 and walk 7 to 9 miles / day.

2 miles is not long at all. Besides, don't people ride bikes anymore? My son lived 1.5 miles away so every day rode his bike to school. His sisters were too cool for bikes so they hoofed it daily.

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stuck_behind_a_truck@reddit

And what ages are you speaking about? The previous commenter could be taking about a 6 year old. That’s an hour’s walk on short legs.

I variously took school buses, city buses, walked, and road my bike. Ages 6-9 was all school buses. Kids need a little more brain development and executive function before they can do two miles.

And I was in an easy California climate. 6-9 in freezing weather for two miles? Yeah, I’m using the car line.

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Harbinger_Kyleran@reddit

Middle school and above these days, elementary schools here are far less, but I remember walking to school about a mile to kindergarden back in the 60's, in the snow no less.

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LadyNiko@reddit

2 miles was my district rule in the 70s and 80s and we didn't have this.

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Standard_Review_4775@reddit

Absolutely. When I pick up my kids they get home probably 40 minutes quicker than the bus does.

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fattycatty6@reddit

Yeah my kid can walk home from school faster than the bus and he is only the 3rd stop on the bus!!! 😆

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Appropriate-Rice-368@reddit

Having my teenage daughter approached and accosted multiple times….yes we drove them to and from school.

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AuroraDF@reddit

I walked, from age 5 to18. I lived in a large town. Some kids were bussed into the high school. Everyone walked to primary school.

OrePhan@reddit

This, my teen gets an extra 45 minutes of sleep, which I believe is healthy. It’s also conveniently omw to work.

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StarsOfMine@reddit

My district requires children fifth grade and under to be picked up and dropped off my a “trusted” adult. This included pick up/drop off by the bus. Older siblings don’t count unless they are in high school, but they can’t drive the younger one to school either…

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Willing_Acadia_1037@reddit

The problem is there aren’t as many kids anymore. I used to walk home from the bus but there were a bunch of kids. Safety in numbers. If my 6 year old takes the bus, she’s the only one in our neighborhood. It only takes a second for a fedex driver or other predator to snatch a child.

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coopnjaxdad@reddit

Ok, 6 year olds aren’t in middle school though. Elementary kids are different and ours were dropped off since their Mom wasn’t working at the time.

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ButYouGotTheClio@reddit

The kids (middle school) in my neighborhood are driven to the bus stop and the cars wait until the bus arrives. Repeat at pickup. The bus stop is one street over in our very safe neighborhood.

When I’m navigating around the idling cars to go to work, I say to myself “just let your kids be independent!” “Don’t you have jobs?”

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AllAboutWoodstock@reddit

In our district you only get bus service if you live more than 2.5 miles away. 2.4 miles is a loooonnnggg walk for a first grader, especially in the winter or in many of the neighborhoods the schools are located in. I agree that parents taking their kids 3 blocks is ridiculous (as are the parents who would show up 45 minutes before school ended to claim their place in line), but it’s not always the case.

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This-Professional-39@reddit

I had to walk a mile to the frigging bus stop. I used to ride my bike to school starting in Junior High, and that was about 5

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Apprehensive-Log8333@reddit

I walked nearly a mile to the bus stop, uphill in the morning, from 4th grade on. My mom would only drive me TO THE BUS STOP if the rhododendron outside the kitchen window had its leaves curled due to it being well below freezing outside.

The issue where I live now (rural area) is that the bus routes are so long. A kid at the beginning of the route might be getting picked up at 6 am and be on the bus until 745. Kids can make a compelling case that a parent should drive them 15 minutes instead.

Also, there is a lot of bullying on the buses, and since we can't seem to hold onto bus drivers, there are no bus monitors to manage that. If your kid keeps getting hurt on the bus, you're more likely to drive them.

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unobitchesbetripping@reddit

When my ('75) kid ('94) was in elementary school I dropped her off and picked her up. A few weeks ago I went with my daughter to pick up my granddaughter from school. The lines weren't any different than the ones before.

I hated the damn bus. Was on a route with some pretty f’d up shitty kids. I would have loved to get a ride to school.

When the kid headed off to school, the bus ride was about 45 minutes - and that sucked. Thanks to lower taxes there were fewer busses.

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EggForTryingThymes@reddit

You’re doing it wrong

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Hefty_Club4498@reddit

When we lived near the elementary, I walked each kid to school each day because it wasn't safe. Eventually the got crossing guards. I still walked them everyday. I saw several near misses and saw a guy punch a hood for a person on their phone driving through a crosswalk almost hitting him and his kids.

So when my son was being bullied in his local Jr High and was the one that got suspended because the other kids knew how to push the envelope just enough. Would it have been better for me to not move him to a different school a few miles away that he actually enjoys going to?

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CommunicationHappy20@reddit

There are always exceptions and as a parent, I too would do what was necessary to protect my child. What I will say, as I write a paper about risky outdoor play and cognitive development, consider the narrative “as safe as possible” is not as healthy as “as safe as necessary.”

When conflict arises, which it does throughout the whole of life, think about how you are problem-solving, critically thinking and persevering through it. That builds important skills like self confidence, resiliency, and executive brain functions to name just a few.

I'm walking my kids to school, but for me I have a hard time imagining letting them walk to school alone. Even though it's only about 4 blocks, they would have to cross an intersection that has stop signs but no crossing guard, and drivers are regularly speeding, not stopping at the line, inching up as people cross, and blowing the stop sign entirely.

Candleforce-9728@reddit

Where I live the buses are terribly understaffed. Frequently one driver has to drive two routes and the kids either have to go wait in the cold for an hour late bus in the morning or get home hours later from school.

We’re open enrolled so bus isn’t available, and walking 10 miles is a no-go. We do carpool, though, with a couple other families, and drop off/pick up two blocks away rather than brave the lines.

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anaisaknits@reddit

Not all schools are close. My kids elementary school was a mile away and crossed a major street with the speed limit of 50 MPH. I wouldn't cross that road myself never mind with my kids. Safety always comes first.

Their middle school was 6 miles away, again major roads. Their school bus required to catch it 5am to then transfer buses 30 minutes away and come back to our area to be at school by 9:30am.

When it came to HS, it was the same thing and I'm not going there with how long it took to get back home.

It became a huge inconvenience and stressful as there were times the school bus didn't show up and I needed to get to work.

Then let's add the entitled and aggressive drivers that blow passed school buses. This isn't a now thing but an always thing as my kids are adults now.

I rode the bus and was bullied when we moved to Texas. (When we lived in Michigan, all my cousins lived in the same town. I was the tiniest and youngest in the family and speech delayed. I had hearing problems, speech delays, and immune system issues). That being said when my sister found out i was being bullied in Texas, the issue was resolved.

I said my kids would never ride the bus. They never did.

Sometimes waiting for your kids is the only time to yourself one has during the day.

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ExpensiveError42@reddit

My daughter's high school was about 2 miles away, which is too far to walk with a mild physical disability, especially with the are weight of Chromebook and notebooks.

Because it was a magnet school her options besides me taking get were to to walk or to get on a bus at about 6 am, ride to one high school (but hers) to wait until all buses arrived so all the magnet school kids could get on another bus to go to the central location where all the magnet kids wait until all the buses from all the high schools got there to get on one more bus to go to their actual school that started at 9. So... Two and a half hours of bus and wait time with two layovers to get to the school that is a 7 minute drive accounting for traffic or I drop her off. She got get license as soon as possible and it made life better for everyone.

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clementynemurphy@reddit

The elementary schools down the street made us drive. I couldn't walk her. I tried to lie all the time that my car was broken. They want license plates for security, instead of some adult walking up. Was insane, and traffic is awful here during school time. And allllllll the busses they have, have like 10 kids on them..

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Nice-Zombie356@reddit

The school and the world are insane.

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m2677@reddit

I could throw a rock from my driveway and hit my kids school, but unless I am standing there at pick-up right outside the doors they take my son to the office to call me to come pick him up. It will be like this all the way up to fifth grade.

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Nice-Zombie356@reddit

The school and the world are insane.

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chaosrulz0310@reddit

Drop and pick up my youngest off for a couple of reasons. One because he has motion sickness and migraines so buses aren’t great for him on the country roads. Two, school is just a couple of miles but the bus route would have him on the bus for an hour or more. Most days my time to leave my house, drop him and get back to my house in the mornings is 15 to 20 minutes.

Walking is out as no sidewalks, busy train tracks and busy highway and two lane roads with blind curves that two cars can barely fit on. I don’t do the pick up lines though. I park and he walks to where I am parked.

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WatermelonMachete43@reddit

We live one block inside the 1.5 mile walking cut-off zone. Is it too far to walk, no...but with the hour most of them needed to be there starting in 6th grade (swim practice 5am, band 7am) and the amount of stuff each kid was carrying (sport bag, school back pack, 1-3 instruments, lunch and sometimes dinner bag), it was easier to drop them off. Would my parents have done that? No.

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BBAus@reddit

Too dangerous across a 6 lane road with idiot drivers who run the red along with badly behaved kids who beat up my kiddo and I happily dropped him off and trusted neighbour kids to walk him home.

My kids bus was cancelled for 3 years because of a lack of drivers (elementary) We are out of the bus zone for high school.

I tried car pooling but with others but it turned out to be too hard.

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gutbutt-or-guthole@reddit

It's a 4 minute drive to my kids school if I drive and a 45 minute trip each way on the bus...

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Nice-Zombie356@reddit

Why do many kids have anti-social and emotional problems now?

I was so happy we had a bus stop somewhat close to us when my kids started school.

I had landed my first fulltime job after being a SAHM, but it was 30 miles in the opposite direction of the school and I needed to start work at 8am.

lessjilly@reddit

During the pandemic, my kids bus had separated (unused, keep distance) seating and they asked the parents who could, to drop off kids. We just never went back because of proximity to work and now one of the kids can drive so it's moot.

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-SQB-@reddit

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Depends on where you live. We’re about a 10m drive from school but we’re one of the first pick-ups and it takes 50m to an hour for it to get to school. Why have teens (who desperately need sleep) get up earlier and ride a bus when we can just drop them off in the way to work? Granted they’re old enough that we can just drop them a block or two away and not wait in the line.

And not all cities have bussing. Our bigger kids when to school in DC and they were taking the train on their own to school.

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ZetaWMo4@reddit

Not every kid is attending their local neighborhood school. My 4 kids always got rides in high school because only one of them attended the closest high school. One daughter I had to drive 25 minutes to the closest bus stop and it was still another 20-30 minute bus ride to her school.

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pickleddresser@reddit

I don't get it either. So dumb. I walked from 4th grade until I could drive at 16. At our school there wasn't even a place where you could get picked up besides the bus circle. My niece rides the bus and I'm so glad my SIL doesn't play with the drop off line.

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Helpful_Balance_4076@reddit

This annoys the hell out of me, too. I explained to my much younger sister (while she was driving my nephew back & forth to school daily) that these schools were never designed for the parents of every single child to descend upon the school twice a day.

one of the first things the school district where i live cut when they had a budget problem in the early 90s (6th grade for me) was rewriting the bus routes and cutting out more stops, along with instituting paid bus passes for parents to purchase. they made a rule that said if you lived within x miles of distance from the school, your child(ren) were ineligible for riding the bus and had to find other means of transportation.

this never affected me as my childhood home was well outside the boundary of any of the schools i went to. but i remember hearing adults loudly complain about it in public and other kids talk about their parents complaining about it if their homes were within the boundary and now they had to walk/bike/inconvenience parents.

and TBH some of the parents had valid complaints.

this restriction was put on ALL students except the disabled children in the special ed classes. they were rightly pissed off that their kindergarten-aged kid was expected to walk a mile plus possibly unsupervised (parents unable to walk them there).
a lot of unpaved roads and roads leading to a few of the schools that had no sidewalks and/or curbs at the time. very dangerous even for the older kids.

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Rad1PhysCa3@reddit

Massive bus driver shortage, budget cuts, etc. In our district, there is no bus service if you live within 2 miles of the school. Having a grade schooler walk on roads with no sidewalks, plus cross a major interstate or highway to get to school isn’t an option (we live in a densely populated urban area). My autistic child, in kindergarten no less, would have had to get on the bus 50 minutes before school starts because he’d need to ride a bus to one school, then get off and find the second bus to a second school. Same story coming back home, making for an almost 10 hour day. For a 5 year old. However this year, they also cut afternoon bus service entirely, and it’s only available in the mornings. So please tell me how all you complainers would avoid the drop off and pick up lines in these situations? Trust me when I say that if I could avoid them, I absolutely would. Anecdotally, the lines are considerably shorter than they were when I was in school 40 years ago too. With a higher student volume. More people are willing to carpool these days, in our area at least.

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UnstableMabel@reddit

Please try to meet people halfway. This has become a burden for everybody. In a lot of cases it's a sudden change and people don't understand why things we expected from our education system (and every other goddamned system) are just gone and societal order is falling down around our ears. We are all getting failed evey day in creative and horrifying ways and it's frustrating everybody.

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We are at the very end of our bus route. If my kids take the bus in the morning we have to get up an hour earlier. If they take the bus home, it's an hour of the afternoon doing nothing but waiting for a bus or sitting on a bus. I'd rather we have the extra sleep in the morning and the extra hour in the afternoon. I work from home, it's nice to have a little break. It's also a calm ten minutes in the car for them to decompress before and after their school day.

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JimmyJack42@reddit

Who's going to tell him?

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BestAtTeamworkMan@reddit

Ehrmagawd! Parents who care enough about their kids to pick them up from school? Schools that try to keep everything safe and orderly during pickup? What kind of weenie shit is that?

I grew up back when parents neglected children and schools turned a blind eye to everything. These things define me as a person and I wear them as a badge of honor.

I suspect it’s a regional thing, or maybe suburbs vs.urban…My own kids usually walked to school for primary and secondary, even when it was -25C (once it got that cold, we would add ski goggles to their ensembles.)

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Future_Department_88@reddit

We rode the city metro bus. And started working at fast food we could walk to at 15 & saved money & got a car for 2k that lasted for years if u took care of it. Poverty my ass

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flytingnotfighting@reddit

Ok fuck you I grew up in a literal dirt floor house, asshole I got my first job at fucking 13 which every fucking penny went to my mom and food for us So how about you get off your old man fucking high horse And I paid for college myself and got my entire family out of that So double fuck you

Some of us had REAL fucking problems You sound like a boomer

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flytingnotfighting@reddit

And mods I'm sorry- but fuck this guy.

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GenX-ModTeam@reddit

Poor Behavior - No antagonism, trolling, rage farming, flame wars, juvenility, or any other overly cantankerous commentary and/or behavior will be tolerated.

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Apparently saying what NEEDS to be said gets erased

So let me try the nice approach

I literally lived in a dirt floor house I had a job at 13 to help buy fucking food You don't know fucking poverty

How you get to act like an asshole but I have to be a kiss ass is some real bullshit but here we are

Also...I got myself out of that poverty, and the rest of my whole family. So yeah my Mommy picked me up from school between jobs Because education was the only way out

Sorry that food took Precident over a car

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Channel_Huge@reddit

My kid’s school doesn’t offer a bus to school. To walk, he would have to go about 5 miles. He’s 11, not 15. The Middle and High School are within walking distance, so he can walk when he gets there.

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dreaminginteal@reddit

I always walked or biked to school, except on the worst weather days in HS when I'd take the municipal bus. Thankfully it stopped a block from home and only two or three blocks from school.

About 20 years ago, my wife and I lived in a place in the SF Bay Area that was just off a street that had two schools on it and two more just a block or two off it. Any day that there was the slightest hint of rain in the forecast, the sea of bikes turned into a river of cars. Literally a mile long backup. And people would look at us, trying to turn out of our cul-de-sac onto the road GOING THE OTHER WAY from them, and they would LOOK US IN THE EYE and then pull across the intersection, blocking us from getting out.

We moved, in part because of that mess.

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blooobolt@reddit

The problem is that parents are sitting in long ass lines and parking where they shouldnt, blocking traffic. The schools weren't designed with these car fests in mind.

There's a high school and an elementary school near me where parents park on both sides of the street, leaving barely enough room for one lane of cars in the middle.

It's a frequently traveled road where cars must travel. But the parents don't care. They have to pick up their kids 2 feet from the door because apparently walking a block is too difficult. There's loads of room around the corner in the street behind the high school. But nobody parks there to pick up. They block the main road instead.

And then youve got the parents running back and forth across the street, not paying attention to moving traffic. Just oblivious to anything.

If a parent feels the need to pick their kids up, fine. But the chaos of EVERY parent doing it is trash.

There was another school operating near me where the line of cars backed up into a huge, major street - like a 6 lanes across in Los Angeles type of street - it was SO dangerous.

They tore the school down (not sure if they're rebuilding it?), so I haven't had to worry about the chaos for a bit. It's been so nice not having to be frightened I'm going to see a 6 year old run into traffic during the end of the school day.

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UnstableMabel@reddit

Everything you said is spot on. I live two streets away from an elementary school on a busy road that dumps out into a main artery my neighborhood has to take to get to practically anything else in town. It is our access unless we drive almost 2.5 miles out of the way.

Twice a day, every day there are cars lined right up to the stop sign and then immediately parked at the opposite curb. You can not see around the cars in either direction so you have to creep out and floor it. I have gotten into a few near misses.

It's AWFUL. I have called the school twice now and they promised the principal has been told. Nothing changed. One time i rolled my window down and said to an idling mother to keep the intersection clear for people to see and oh my god did she freak out. Like, anger issues mad. First she could not, would not understand that boxing in the perpendicular road was insufficient and unsafe (this idiot kept repeating "I did MY part! I did MY part!") Then she informed me that she, presumably alone, pays taxes. Oh. And "it's a SCHOOL." Thanks lady, I wasn't aware.

I'm at my wits end. Next i'm taking pictures and reaching out to the town's traffic division. I don't want to because i get that taking photos outside of a school is sensitive, but I gave the school enough of a chance to act and they refused. And if I get into any kind of accident I want this documented.

My spouse is a school bus driver as his dream semi-retirement job

as a cyclist who passes a school between home and work, navigating those long lines of invariably single occupant vehicles, speeding, clumping up, turning without seeing me, idling and spewing exhaust, well, it kinda sucks. they tie up traffic, they stink, and it's just so much waste: time, traffic, fuel.

those twenty idling cars (well, if we're honest they're hardly cars these days, the rigs people drive now tend to be the size of small RVs) could be one bus!

We lived too far for my kids to walk to high school, and the busses were overcrowded. Kids don’t need that kind of hassle in the mornings, so I always took them. At the time, it was on my way to work, so perfect for me.

Tim-no@reddit

I walked to school, with my older sister for a bit and then friends from Grade 1 on. However, our neighborhood had lots of children taking the same route and we all kind of looked out for each other. It probably took about 45 minutes when I was a little kid, and then about 20 by the time I finished grade school. I don’t recall many kids being dropped off by their parents. This was one n the early eighties.

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must_eye@reddit

We live in a primarily drop off neighborhood and we are outside the normal by letting/making our kids walk to school and ride the buses.

I like that they can be independent and take care of themselves, but sometimes I see the other parents walking with their kids to school and I get a tinge of regret. These are opportunities to spend time with them in an easy way, And these opportunities get fewer and fewer as they get older.

My oldest is a freshman and walks to the high school, and it won’t be long before she is an adult and gone. Kinda sad.

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darkest_irish_lass@reddit

You're teaching your kids how to be self sufficient, which is going to pay loads of dividends in the future. I would not have traded that early feeling of independence and self reliance for anything.

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Csimiami@reddit

Yeah this is my feeling as well. My first born went to a charter about ten mikes away. So he was in carpool until he could drive. Second and third are at the local schools and ride their bikes. Though I loved that time with my oldest who graduates this year (sniff) he’s not nearly as self sufficient as the younger two

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NetJnkie@reddit

You know which parents started this? We did. It's so funny how some of us became the helicopter parents and stuff.

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Girl_with_no_Swag@reddit

Yep. It’s that pendulum swing. We were raised unsupervised, yet also during a time when stranger kidnappings were both at its peak AND when media reporting of it became wide spread. Divorce rates were amongst the highest, and infrastructure wasn’t in place for single working parents to even access much childcare in most places in the country.

We saw our friends self-destruct. We are determined to do things differently. We wanted kids to sort of fill the emotional void we were left with in our childhoods.

Then….

We absolutely smothered them. Every bit of time was over scheduled and over supervised. We failed to find balance.

And guess what, those kids grew up wanting FREEDOM. So they don’t want be tied down by having kids. They see all the work their parents put in, sacrificing themselves for their kids, and they don’t want to make that sacrifice. They just want to finally go out with their friends unsupervised and not tied down by kids.

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Solid-Wish-1724@reddit

Are you thick? Not everyone lives within walking or biking distance, nor is it necessarily safe to do so. In my district you have to live outside 5 miles of school to be bus eligible. Then there are after school activities, sports, etc that you can't jus "bus to." JFC.

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RiverJai@reddit

Would love explanation for the downvotes

In a less than one-year span in my city, 2 women were killed by gunfire as innocent bystanders. Just caught in the crossfire. One of them happened less than a mile from where my kid would be catching the bus.

gif

I've had the most meaningful conversations with each of my sons in the 6 minutes it takes to drive to their schools. I mean, we're constantly hanging out but sometimes the drive is the only 1:1 time we might get during the school week.

Fourth to eighth grade I walked a little over half a mile to school. Some days I got picked up in the afternoon. High school we had moved to a more rural area. It was just over 2 miles to the bus stop. Had to walk sometimes. Rarely got a ride all the way to school.

Now, a lot of bus routes have been cut because of budgets, and not many kids seem to walk unless they live within a few blocks of school. Even where I live now, there are kids waiting for the bus when the school is less than a mile away.

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GrogJoker@reddit

I rode 15 miles by bike every day when i was 10 years old, most people did back then.

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Myzoomysquirrels@reddit

My kiddo rides with me to the school I work at and rides a bus to her school from there. That is all she rides the bus because the bus is a lawless place.

Plus if she rides the bus home it takes almost an hour and a half. I can pick her up and be home in 15 minutes.

Oh and my jeep has seatbelts and airbags.

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Seattle_chickey@reddit

Shit, walked uphill both ways to school.

(Seriously there was an uphill incline to the halfway point, then a downhill the rest of the way

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bugabooandtwo@reddit

Seriously. Walking to and from school was the best part of the day as a kid. Kids are missing out on a lot of personal development by being shuttled everywhere.

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CraftLass@reddit

My best friend had to do that. She would pick me up at my house the bottom of the hill.

It's a shame she didn't have kids to lord that over.

Jealous-Cup-4059@reddit

What bus?

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TizzyTism@reddit

The assumption that busses, school or public transit, are available everywhere to everyone is WILD!

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bugabooandtwo@reddit

These parents do the same thing for the kids who have after school jobs, too. Drive right up to the door of the retailer or fast food place and wait. Won't even park in the parking lot. Heaven forbid the kids have to walk ten feet to mommy's car.

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Wander_Globe@reddit

1/3 of a mile to the bus stop?

We have a shortage of drivers, the school asked all parents that could to drive their kids. Our bus was so full kids were squatting in the aisles so the cameras wouldn’t “catch” it. Kids took video and another bus had to be added. The high school doesn’t have enough parking for the kids and there isn’t street parking. My kid still rides the bus, but I understand the challenges that even that brings.

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FelineOphelia@reddit

Did you walk to school in the rain uphill both ways?

Like?

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depthchargethel@reddit

I walked 2 miles each way every day, rain or shine, from 7th grade till I graduated. Lucky for me my grade school was only two blocks away. Walked there everyday.

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Jef_Wheaton@reddit

Yes.

I lived in one hill, the school was on another. It was uphill both ways. We were 1 block shy of the "1 mile limit" where we'd be allowed to ride the bus.

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muchquery@reddit

I grew up with the bus most years. For my kid (gen z) walking and biking weren't allowed at all. It was the bus, which weirdly dropped every kid off at their driveway, or car.

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LoonieToonie88@reddit

I drive/pick my son up because its a 4 minute drive in the car vs an hour and 10 minutes on the bus. It's ridiculous.

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Icy_Helicopter_9624@reddit

There is nothing wrong with riding the bus, I rode the bus as a kid. However, I also had bad things happen to me on the bus. I’m not saying that’s how it is today, but that’s how it was when I was kid.

What is fucking nonsense are the parents who drive their kids to the bus stop and then sit at the end of their street (or their driveway since around here most people live on a main road and not in a neighborhood) until the bus comes.

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Miserable_Carry_3949@reddit

I do this. I would not leave my kid on the side of the highway. Too many crazy unsafe people out there. It's also really cold most of the winter. And, this is one of the best times to actually have a conversation with him.

Consider that people have different needs and concerns and relationships with their children unknown to the rest of us.

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I swear I got followed by a tornado once myself. And the snow! My brother and I scaled 10 foot snowdrifts in -30F walking to school! 😁

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MegaMiles08@reddit

I don't know, and I often wonder the same thing. My kid rode the bus until he was old enough to drive. We'd take him on the 1st day of school when he was little, but that was it. When he was in elementary school, it was pretty close...about 1 mile away, and he liked riding his bike, and we'd ride with him to school, but I don't understand everyone driving their kids to school when there is a bus.

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MidwestAbe@reddit

We live 3 miles or about 8 minutes by car from our schools. Our kids can spend 8 minutes in a car or 45 minutes or more on a bus. And then there are the days when they double route because a driver is out.

CompanyOther2608@reddit

I think a better question might be, when did Gen X become Boomers, unable to realize that times and circumstances have changed?

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sageamericanidiot@reddit

This

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CompanyOther2608@reddit

That OP yelling at clouds is a sign that they want to complain about how things were different “back in the day,” rather than being curious.

A quick Google search tells me that the following are contributing factors:

• Skyrocketing Overhead: High fuel costs and massive insurance premiums have made maintaining a bus fleet one of the first things to get trimmed in a budget crisis.
• The Rise of Fees: To offset costs, many districts now charge families "transportation fees," making a daily carpool or parent drop-off the cheaper option.
• Maintenance & Staffing: Aging buses require expensive repairs, and the chronic shortage of CDL drivers has forced schools to cancel routes or tighten eligibility.
• Liability Paranoia: Schools face much higher litigation risks than in the '80s. A single accident at a bus stop can result in a massive lawsuit, leading districts to offer the bare minimum of service.
• Supervision Standards: "Latchkey" culture is dead. Stricter child welfare interpretations mean parents fear being reported for neglect if a child is seen walking long distances or waiting at a bus stop alone.
• Strict Distance Mandates: Many states have laws that draw a hard line (e.g., 2 miles). If you live 1.9 miles away, the school isn't legally obligated to pick you up, leaving parents to fill the gap.

• Hostile Road Design: Modern suburbs are often built with cul-de-sacs and high-speed roads that lack sidewalks, making a walk that was "doable" in 1980 physically dangerous today.
• Zoning Issues: As schools consolidated into massive regional campuses, the distance between home and the classroom increased, making bus routes long, inefficient, and undesirable.

Not a parent, but when I lived in suburban Houston I heard lots of awful stories about out of control bullying and fighting on school buses. Also, most neighborhoods didn't have sidewalks, so kids who lived closer to the school weren't allowed to walk or ride bikes/scooters in the street (though there are a few rebels on our block). I grew up in the inner city and it was safe for me and my brother to walk to grade school (and it was only a few blocks away), but even by the mid-1980s it wasn't a good idea to walk or ride the bus. Yhis was in Chicago, so it was the CTA bus, only suburban kids had school buses. My brother got a car at 15 and either he or my parents got me to & from high school for the most part. If I had kids I'd really have to weigh the pros and cons of them taking a bus.

This is good parenting.

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salsafresca_1297@reddit

School districts cut funding for bus routes and it suuuuuuucks! Then you combine it with urban sprawl making roads too dangerous for biking and walking, and you have your perfect recipe for the School Pick-Up Racket.

One small hack: Register your kid as a walker. Then instruct them to walk to the adjacent neighborhood, where you'll be parked.

My kid rides the bus to school, but we pick him up. It's an hour ride to go a 10 min distance. We need him on the bus so we can work, but don't subject him to it twice a day. Kids on the bus can have behavior problems after school.

I didn't have a bus near me for HS. Twice when I walked in HS, I had men try to get me into their car. So, I didn't walk anymore.

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mldyfox@reddit

In the very small town I grew up in, pretty much all the kids in town walked to school, with the exception of 6th, 7th and 8th graders whose parents paid for a bus for their kids. They all loved on the other side of town from the middle school.

The town is only 2 square miles in its entirety. From kindergarten on, my sisters and I walked about 8 blocks to school.

Migamix@reddit

My ass had to bike to school, over train tracks, sometimes with a train sitting right on the only place I could cross, meaning I carried my bike over the hitch, and hoped it didn't actually decide to move, the crew watching me do this every morning actually started parking 50 meters back . I've flipped my bike over me once on my way back, and missed a stop sign leaving me half way under a car, but I still had to bike to school that day. Poor pathetic fragile kids with stupid parents that can't do their job keeping them from doing stupid shit online. The human race isn't going to make it.

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WyndWoman@reddit

Don't forget adding to Rush hour traffic.

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RadiantCarpenter1498@reddit

My kids would be on the bus for 40 minutes each way instead of 7 minutes in the car.

Bus transportation isn't what it used to be, and kids don't always go to a local school. In our state, there are local schools, charter schools, private schools, etc.

In our Urban district our kids went to a theme school (part of the district, but with a special philosophy). You send your kid to the neighborhood school hub, and they get bused from there to the theme school. The school my kids went to was a combined neighborhood and theme school when we started. We had direct busing, and although there were some hiccups, it was great.

Then, they ended the neighborhood school in that building and it became theme school only. The new neighborhood elementary school was farther from our home than the theme school. So, we could s and the kids 1 hour earlier to get bused to the theme school, wait there for 30 minutes (not always well supervised because they had trouble finding people to work 1 hour a day for ten bucks an hour), and then get on another bus to be taken to their actual school. When the weather was bad, the kids had to sit in the hallway quietly, because the neighborhood school started 30 minutes earlier.

Or, we could keep them home another hour, have a leisurely morning, and drive them 3 minutes to the theme school directly, or get there a little early so they can play on the playground. For some reason I never understood, they did bus the kids directly home, instead of going back to the neighborhood school and switching buses there. But other kids living farther away do switch buses both going and coming home.

And the privately sourced bus company is Terrible. When busing got outsourced for cheap, quality and safety has plummeted. It seemed to get worse every year, despite numerous parent action groups focused solely on resolving transportation issues. We had kids at the theme school for 18 years (4 kids from pre k 3 year olds to 8th grade) and although we tried the bus for awhile, we eventually gave it up.

In my school district

half mile gets no school bus .5 - 1.5 mile there is a fee to ride the bus More than 1.5 mile = free ride on school bus

I used to drop off my high schooler in morning and let them take the bus home after school because the pickup bus came a bit too early in the morning.

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The_Serpent_Of_Eden_@reddit

Because my stupid school district assumed that every high school student within a five-mile radius of the school could drive to school or get a ride from an older sibling. So, yes...there were a whole bunch of angry parents dropped off 14 and 15 year olds who had no other way to get to school.

Bus service was offered for those in middle and elementary school, thank god.

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Martian6261@reddit

We pick up our grandson (7th grade) for our daughter. He can take the bus, if he does, it’s over an hour to get home. If we pick him up, he’s home in less than 15 minutes. He has also mentioned that the kids make fun of him, that’s an hour of abuse.

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Bus rides in the district I teach in are often over an hour long each way. The kids across the street from me are picked up at 6:15 and get back at 4:20. School is 7:55-3:00.

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livens@reddit

My daughter rode the bus all through elementary right up until Covid. During lockdown we had NTI so everyone just stayed home. Once schools opened back up to in person... a few things changed. Most of the bus drivers were older semi-retired folk. During Covid they just decided to fully retire and unfortunately we lost a few to Covid. For the first year back the busses were extremely unreliable and we often received texts that certain busses would be HOURS late or simply wouldn't show up. The district struggled with hiring new drivers so they've combined routes. They has left many busses with standing room only. Standing in the aisle of a packed bus for 45+ minutes with a huge backpack. I'm not even sure if that's legal. So I drop my daughter off in the morning and she rides the bus home. For whatever reason the busses have plenty of room in the afternoons.

Until my sister and I could drive we rode the city bus to and from school.

My kids walked to/from school with the exception of 1 year (school was too far). When the weather was bad I dressed them properly and kicked their asses out the door.

My son pays another parent to take his kids since he works the early shift. They live 3 blocks from school.

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TrainingLow9079@reddit

The closest walk. The furthest ride a bus. The middles away but not far enough for bus get dropped off or picked up.

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seemsright_41@reddit

I have a high schooler, With all of the budget cuts buses are no longer a thing. And people wont let their kids walk to school.

I have a Jr, who goes to high school/community college across town. So I get to drive her, we are counting down till she can drive herself when she turns 16.

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Matloc@reddit

I agree but my kids school is like 5 minutes away so she gets dropped off before work.

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daphatty@reddit

We have an EV. #smug

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Pupation@reddit

My son rides the bus every day. I think many of the kids in his district still do, especially in the morning. After school, a lot of kids have extracurricular activities.

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TheBeachLifeKing@reddit

I shut my car off while waiting, even in the winter.

Many kids these days are 'school of choice' where busses are not an option.

For the in-district kids, the nature of school busses these days means that they will have to be at the bus stop an hour or more before they would need to leave if dropped off.

Back when we were young, districts were less sprawling, more kids road the bus and it wasn't an issue to have one bus stop for an entire neighborhood. These days a single bus traverses a much larger route and will often stop at each house on that route.

My coworker had a 10th grade daughter. She was very petite. One day after school she decided to walk to the mall. This was in a safe part of town in a very large city, but one that is often ranked in the top 5 safest cities in the US. It was 3 miles away. A cop stopped her, called her mom and made her mom leave work to come pick her up. The girl was 15 years old, 5” 90 pounds, blonde.

Things have just changed. Society expects way more supervision than we ever had

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Comfortable-Bed-6814@reddit

Agreed

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melophile2702@reddit

Um. Have you not seen the state of society? You must not be a parent.

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small_spider_liker@reddit

The “state of society” is so much safer than it was when we were kids. But as a whole, American people are more afraid and anxious now. The crime statistics do not support any notion that the world is less safe, but for some reason it’s widely believed that kids are more in danger.

Children are far less independent and self-sufficient than they were 30 years ago, that much is true. Maybe it’s important to coddle and protect these little delicate marshmallows, because if they haven’t learned resilience by high school, it would be irresponsible to abandon them to the difficulties of navigating public transit and figuring out who are the safe adults to ask for help.

On the other hand, the Gen Z kids I talk to are kind and thoughtful and good people. Maybe we don’t need to raise them on a Lord of the Flies model.

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IKnowAllSeven@reddit

Many school districts used to have busses. Over the decades, many have cut bus service.
Even among those who have bus service, they may have cut routes, meaning some kids, in my district for example, get to the bus at 545 am. Which means they are waking at 515am. Some parents think that’s way too early and instead let the kids sleep in and drop them off at a more reasonable time.
Many schools have closed in the last thirty years. So, now, instead of a school 4 blocks away, it’s 12 blocks, and possibly with no street lights, and / or unsafe walking spaces (ie- no walking spaces)
When I was a kid and walked to school, I got chased by stray dogs, and once was approached by a stranger in the park; an older man in his 20s who kept telling me I was beautiful. I was 12. I enjoyed walking to school on the whole, I liked going on walks, even as a kid and there were two neighborhood cats who got pets from me on my way home. I’m not suggesting that danger lurks around every corner when walking to school, just saying that it’s not all it’s cracked up to be either.
Nobody likes drop off. Go ahead, ask parents if this is something they enjoy. They don’t. Just one of those things

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Cmorethecat@reddit

in the huge city/school district where I live, busing isn't really a thing for local students. The only local students who get a bus are those who are designated special needs. If you live in the area, there is no bus for you.

That said, I parked a few blocks away to wait for my kiddo. I'm not sitting in that line with crazy parents who behave like they've never been behind the wheel of a car. I did the same at morning drop off.

Our HS was only a mile away so my kids walked or rode their bikes most days.

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Pristine_Frame_2066@reddit

Busses are not available. I do have my kid do public busses when she is out with friends but there are no lines near my home at all.

At drop off my husband gets her close. I do pick ups and I hang out around a corner parked in shade.

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Stephreads@reddit

Our school district pays upwards of 6 million dollars (yes, you read that right) for FOUR school buildings with a total of ~2800 kids. No route is more than 30 minutes. And still, the lines for drop off and pick up are staggering. Personally, I think it’s because the majority of bus drivers in my area are elderly. My kids are adults now, but I’d be nervous about putting them on a bus with a driver who’s over 75 years old.

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TheFightens@reddit

Somehow the same parents who walked and took the bus themselves are convinced their kids can’t do the same thing.

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Roofofcar@reddit

Despite crime being dramatically lower basically everywhere in the country than the 70s/80s/90s, boomer fear mongers convinced a bunch of us that there were kidnappers on every corner.

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CawlinAlcarz@reddit

I've been watching this bullshit for decades now with increasing disbelief, and have asked every parent I know about it and they all have one ridiculous rationalization or another.

When I was school age and before I had a car to go to school or a friend who could drive, I rode the bus every day, from age 5 onward.

In the mornings, for grade school, the bus ride was 45 minutes plus. I was the 3rd stop from school and they picked up my stop on the way out, but in the afternoon I was the 3rd stop off, for a 10 minute ride. The route was somewhat dangerous rural highways that were not safe to walk or ride bikes during rush hour traffic.

Middle and early high school the bus ride was 45ish minutes each way. Before they had the after school sports bus, there were 3 of us whose parents took turns each week picking us up from high school sports practices before we could drive.

The bitch of all this parent driving is that it puts enormous traffic pressure on especially the morning rush hour drive.

Last year (before I changed jobs) I had to shift my morning commute 30 minutes earlier to avoid the shitty school drop-off lines which would have made my commute 2 hours instead of 90 minutes.

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KitchenNazi@reddit

My kid can leave elementary school on his own with a note. I don’t do any of that car line stuff - i can drop him off nearby and walk into the yard to get him.

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BigJon83@reddit

Not every district has busses. mine didnt. we had to ride public transportation and still walk 5 miles on the shoulder of a 45mph road.

Its essentially the overprotective helicopter parent aspect of society today. Everybody is into excessive risk mitigation.

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InevitableStruggle@reddit

I pick up my grandson three blocks from home. He gets home in time to see his friends walk by the house.

When I was a kid my ‘bus’ was a small crowd of neighborhood kids who walked the whole mile to school.

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CrazyButterfly11@reddit

I remember one day when I was a senior and it was pouring down rain, I saw my grandma’s car parked and waiting and I was so excited! Then my little 7th grade brother got in and they drove away without me ☹️… We lived 3 blocks away by the way 🙄🙄

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EmergencyTall6617@reddit

That’s horrible! 😞😞😞

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https://www.wjbf.com/news/driver-arrested-after-4-year-old-was-left-on-daycare-bus-in-thomson/

https://abc17news.com/news/2025/08/13/mother-describes-terrifying-moment-her-son-was-left-on-school-bus/

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oh-pointy-bird@reddit

If you are upset about “all these awful things” that happen with buses boy are you going to be upset when you compare those statistics to _what happens with cars_.

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Normal-Philosopher-8@reddit

My high schooler is in a specialty program with a bus stop over two miles away. (And uphill - both ways!). She would lose a full hour and a half of sleep to catch it, by the time she walked to the stop and rode the route.

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MundaneHuckleberry58@reddit

I was the second round of bus. Wait at school 45-50 minutes while they dropped off the closer-in kids. Bus returned to school to get us farthest out kids. I was the second to last stop. I was getting home at 4:50 when school got out at 3:25.

I am fortunate to give my kids the extra time at home I never got. And, fwiw, our car rides are the best conversational quality time.

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My kids didn’t qualify for bussing or the bus times were absolutely ridiculous.

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mhchewy@reddit

My kid would have to get to the bus stop much earlier than if I dropped her off. It is mostly on the way to work so I just head in after drop off.

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Old_Goat_Ninja@reddit

Where I live, same place I grew up and went to school, no, busses aren’t really a thing anymore, not like when I was a kid anyways.

That being said when I took my kids to school I didn’t wait in that line of cars. I drove close enough, then got out and walked with my kids to school then back to my car and left. I never understood why people sit in the line, it’s like everyone is afraid of walking now days.

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MaximumJones@reddit

It is the same as those cars with a "Save the Planet" bumper sticker that sits idle in the drive thru for 20 minutes. 😎😁

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alr12345678@reddit

The worst!!

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alr12345678@reddit

I also don’t get it. I chose to raise my kid in an urban area so we can walk/ bike to school and there’s still people making shitty decisions in driving to drop their precious high schooler at the front door. My son has been riding his bike independently to school all through middle school. We don’t really have school busses because we have public transportation and kids get a free pass starting in middle school.