A320 - Struggling with line training - when to call it quits?

Posted by aeryn2244@reddit | flying | View on Reddit | 112 comments

Flight training has been challenging from the get go, not the theoretical content, not the flows. My struggle has been the manual handling. I had to repeat flights when flying single engine, and multi-engine was challenging (fewer flights repeated, but had issues with flare/landing technique, couldn't handle adverse weather very well, and poor rudder authority on assymetric flights).

Long story short, I made it to the airlines and base training didn't go quite as well as I had hoped. Flat landings and inconsistent flare technique. I got another go but the winds were picking up, and my manual handling wasn't good (couldn't stabilise on final approach, therefore didn't have a good stabilised platform coming up to that 50 ft). This wasn't marked a fail and I was allowed to have another sim session, then another go. Managed to get a great day out, basically nil winds and I passed eventually.

This first set of failures, I took it hard, I cried in front of the instructor (not a good look, but in my mind the base training was supposed to be the day all my training consolidated and I could start a new chapter of training on the line, and I bungled it). I was so confident I thought I had it in the bag, I figured having passed the sim, I was ready to go. But the technique just wasn't up to par, and my confidence was completely shot. I started to think of the financial hole I had dug for myself, and what possible career I could have afterwards. Eventually passing didn't feel as good as I thought it would, perhaps because I had put so many expectations on the first day.

Anyway, I got out on the line. First week started off great, demonstrated the flows well and learned more things I wasn't exposed to in the sims. Instructors have remarked I am well ahead of where I need to be in terms of knowledge, admin, descent management, comms etc. But my handling is still poor. In that first week I got the dreaded 'priority left' on two occasions. On one of them, after the '20' call out the plane just continue to float with no indication of touching down. On the second one my pitch rate was too fast and I got the 'pitch' call.

Second week of line training, control was taken on two occasions yet again. I got the pitch callout, and I got destabilised and ended up floating and left of centerline for the other. It wasn't a great start to the week, and with wind gusts of 25-35 kts, I didn't get to do many other landings in the week, instructors didn't want to have to take control because I don't do well with weather, so they didn't want my confidence to get shot even further. On the last day, wind calm, I got two landings. The first was okay, correct flare height, good pitch rate. Manual brakes all the way so struggled just a bit with mantaining the centerline and braking at the same time, but it was adequate (could have been better). The second landing I felt I flared to high and eased off the back pressure. Turns out I flared at the right time, and needed a bit more back pressure. More sim time is being recommended.

I am really at a low point. I can't say I have tried my hand at many things in life, but for those that I have, I have either excelled, or met the standards. But with flying I can't seem to hack it. What good is it to apply all the right techniques and knowledge and get into the air only to not be able to safely land? I have read the FCTM over and over again, I've watched countless videos to see how others approach the flare. I study, I put the work in. But the manual flying is a mountain I am starting to believe I can't climb. I've had over 200 sim hours, and coming up on almost 50 hours in the aircraft (granted I have only had about 8 landings but still); this is more than enough experience to be able to get things right. And I just don't seem to be getting it.

Has anyone had issues of this magnitude, or know of those who have? And when would be a good time to call it quits? I can genuinely say I have tried my very best, it just isn't enough, and maybe I am not coachable.

And how do I move forward? I don't like wearing the uniform anymore, I feel it isn't earned and I am not at the level I should be to wear it. And I worry about future prospects as I have no savings, and nothing else to fall back on. I'm basically scr*wed. I doubt I will be given more chances to show I can manually fly and land, which means I am just counting down the days until I am let go. And when I am, I have nothing else to fall back on (I've an MPL so I can't look for opportunities elsewhere).

Anyway, this is where I am at. All tips/advice are welcome.