The happy medium is (was) enforced monogamy in western nations. It allowed for some free market forces to drive up the quality of the suitors in the pool via regulated competition but still generally assigned like to like in terms of relative hierarchical position, curtailing excesses via social taboo. Hyperpolygamy and arranged marriage are polar extremes of both respective urges.

Hyperpolygamy, (what we are dabbling with,) is laissez faire sexual market forces run amok and is eroding social bonds/cultural norms, leaving very few people happy as an increasingly small minority, (polygamous men,) gain unprecedented influence over a large portion of the available market. (Hypergamous women).

However bad of a wrap that all might be arranged marriage is as bad if not worse- it's social/cultural forces given tyrannical degree at the total sacrifice of normal sexual market forces; it makes sure mates are assigned, sure, but by fiat which both leaves the people involved usually unsuited to each other and generally degrades the quality of suitors over time. (This via incest or a lack of competition for courtship that disincentivizes the development of high quality suitorhood- if you know you are going to get married no matter what then you do not need to put in the work to make yourself marriable).

Neither of these are the markers of successful societies.

The only viable strategy really is to put in the work to make yourself marriable regardless. Fight your demons, make yourself and your world better, live bravely/foolhardy- the right person will show up.