What i did while bulking: semi-blended filini (weight before boiling was 250g), milk and butter.

Posted by Hitman_666@reddit | shittyfoodporn | View on Reddit | 121 comments

While bulking i used to eat so much pasta that I got tired of chewing.

One day, I decided to blend it, and to drink the pasta, so after cooking I put the pasta in a jar, I added milk (extra protein) to make it more liquid and to make blending easier, and some butter (extra fats) to make it go down easier and smoother.

After blending for a bit the blender broke, leaving the pasta semi-blended, so the bottom is blended while the top is not, the middle being a grey zone of disgust.

I couldn't be bothered to throw it away and make some more, so i ate the whole thing with a spoon.

It fucking sucked.

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Next-Drink8593@reddit

OMFG! No sir…. No.

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LostPrussia@reddit

Why does every gym bro eat like they have a severe eating disorder

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D31taF0rc3@reddit

Ive been saying for years on this sub that gym bro's shitty food is an eating disorder

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NeiNerd@reddit

Occam's razor.

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The_Poster_Nutbag@reddit

Herbs mess with your micros bro, get with the program. You only need protein, no fiber.

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maplecinnamonoatmeal@reddit

That’s just not healthy.

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CoconutxKitten@reddit

Because they usually do

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BlindStickFighter@reddit

Physically changing your body is hard and the mental strain gets to people

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Mirk_Dirkledunk@reddit

Lol. Well, you're never going to believe this, but...

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avemflamma@reddit

they have an eating disorder is why

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NukesAndSupers@reddit

gee I wonder why

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sd_saved_me555@reddit

Sir, you are bulking. This is supposed to be the time you get to eat good food, not prison leftovers

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Hitman_666@reddit (OP)

I ate as much as i could, my metabolism is FAST ,i am a mesomorph with some ectomorph traits, one being the struggle to gain fat.

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northkoreasuks@reddit

"ectomorph traits" LMAO body types are astrology for gymbros

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creatyvechaos@reddit

I thought he was talking some Alien/Predator shit (idk which movie it is, sorry; never seen it.) Xenomorph or smthn

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protestantcontestant@reddit

It’s like the whole omega verse thing with alphas Md omegas lol 😂

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Josefuuu@reddit

Do you poop out ectoplasm or something

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decemberhunting@reddit

CICO my friend

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taylorthestang@reddit

I see the most devious, blended chipotle bowl, looking meals from people bulking. My guy, out of all the food you could be eating you choose this. I’d be smashing PBJs and racks of ribs if I were them.

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Ill-Television8690@reddit

If only I had the money for ribs to be a regular thing haha

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calembo@reddit

I feel like this is what happens when people eat because they have to and not because they like to.

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lumpyspacejams@reddit

Alternately, based on some noted strongman diets - this is the time to eat all of the cod you can possibly get your hands on. Eat what you want, but also eat an orca's portion of cod every single day. Fatty tuna is also acceptable.

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EZE333@reddit

Not as bad as my roommate blending sardines and tuna fish with milk and protein powder.

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MachangaLord@reddit

Not gonna knock it but I had to eat vanilla ice cream, anchovies and hot sauce because I lost a bet

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Ihaveabudgie@reddit

Please tell your roommate there are people out there who love them and that they don't have to live like this

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nonoyo_91@reddit

This looks like seviyan 🤣😭 lord the dissapointed face I'd have made if I went in to try this thinking it is seviyan

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BoredasUsual88@reddit

If I had to voluntarily eat this everyday, I’d cry every time.

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Mikebyrneyadigg@reddit

This is a dirty, filthy bulk.

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Hitman_666@reddit (OP)

No, the dirty bulk is when you don't wash

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nerdtasticg@reddit

Geezus I thought this was the sourdough sub

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Ihaveabudgie@reddit

When I'm in a "eating appealing food" competition and my opponent is a bodybuilder:

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Theabsoluteworst1289@reddit

This is sick. Definitely belongs here though.

Hope you’re getting the help you need.

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thattomas@reddit

gif

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Consistent-Menu-6629@reddit

Relatable post as someone who struggles to keep on weight and eat enough.

Food is always easier to eat in liquid form... But, not always fun to eat...

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Hitman_666@reddit (OP)

Thank for your understanding, you are correct, especially when it comes to the blender.

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ragnawrekt@reddit

god bodybuilding people are so deeply averse to any remotely normal food it's fucking unhinged. it literally has to be an underidentified dysmorphia psychosis self hate spiral at this point because they just can't stop literally torturing themselves with actual inedible garbage. like a personal punishment for requiring nutrients. like this crap has the same energy as the clean eating girlies that have a breakdown if they eat more than a whole almond in a day 🫠

like this is literally a fuckin eating disorder and people need to start doing interventions

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Hitman_666@reddit (OP)

I eat well now, but then i did everything to reach the (unhealthy and over the top) goals that i set for myself.

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Reccalovesdancing@reddit

The medical term for that is orthorexia just fyi

Make sure you get some help with it because EDs can come back around and bite you a lot harder when you are least expecting it

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Hitman_666@reddit (OP)

I appreciate the concern, but i stopped working out that hard, i study, i practice sports occasionally, i maintain an active lifestyle, and i eat whatever i want whenever i want, i have no eating disorder

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I_Hate_Tyops@reddit

Ah.. I'm happy to hear that! -Truly. My comment was based on the original post. Ofc I dont know anything else about the person behind it. It sounds like you found a healthy approach to life. 👍🏻

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pepcorn@reddit

I'm glad to hear you're in recovery.

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ragnawrekt@reddit

Honestly I'm glad that you're recovering. Sorry if my comment was pretty harsh about it but I get so upset seeing how people usually try to normalize or underplay the harm of this kind of dieting. Truly glad to know you are in a better place today!

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I_Hate_Tyops@reddit

I have no doubt in my mind that it's an eating disorder. you draw a line: in the middle is normal, on one end of the line: anorexia. The other end is bodybuilding, -maxxing whatever.. Same thing, different approach!

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Ikillwhatieat@reddit

😬

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RutabagaChance5382@reddit

Why not just eat cornmeal mush or grits or something...

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FollowingJealous7490@reddit

It's spaghetti everyone!

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Fullblodsneger@reddit

Just what I want for dinner, a jar of intestinal parasites.

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MrCockingFinally@reddit

"Bulking"

My brother in Christ, just say you have an eating disorder.

Literally any pasta with a cream and cheese based sauce is going to be more calorie dense than this and actually taste good.

If you are tired of chewing, mass gainer shakes exist.

Tired of pasta and want carbs with fat? Fucking french fries.

Tired of that? Fried rice.

Slap some chicken thigh on any of this and you have your protein.

What the fuck is wrong with you actually?

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ScroochDown@reddit

Jesus fucking Christ.

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Downtown_Brother6308@reddit

Is bulking another term for mental illness?

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wheretohides@reddit

Listen... It's okay to love yourself! You don't have to torture yourself to get ripped bro.

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Hitman_666@reddit (OP)

I tortured myself and got ripped, and it was WORTH IT. I have now learnt to love myself for things other than my body.

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EmbarrassedStreet828@reddit

Just say you can't cook.

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Cigi_94@reddit

Bro you can still make pasta the normal way

You dont have to do whatever this is...

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Peacok648@reddit

Brother I thought you were eating a whole jar of raw sourdough starter.

I think you could have probably pull this off by adding flour and an insane amount of carrots + some deli-meats then fry it till cooked and crispy. Then you'd get some weird frankenstein turnip cake but without the turnip and without the rice flour.

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Responsible-Still839@reddit

I don't say this lightly, but, you should never be allowed to touch food again.

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DriftingIntoAbstract@reddit

gif

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Salt_Mountain_837@reddit

my brother why not just make some buttered noodles

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CheesyCock47@reddit

congratulations on making the least appetizing possible thing with the simplest ingredients

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Hitman_666@reddit (OP)

This isn't shitty food, this is horror food

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themigraineur@reddit

Wouldn't it be easier just to make a pasta milkshake

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SpotCreepy4570@reddit

He was trying the blender broke, didn't you read his comment ?

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themigraineur@reddit

Yeah but why butter and milk, vanilla ice cream would probably be 800% better

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SpotCreepy4570@reddit

Good question, maybe a sugar issue?

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saladmunch2@reddit

He needs butter to make it more slippy

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creatyvechaos@reddit

Ever heard of a butter-dipped softserve?

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saladmunch2@reddit

Thats a new one to me, it doesn't sound terrible though lol

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MyUserNameLeft@reddit

You can swallow spaghettis without chewing. Really fast to eat

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dirtymike401@reddit

Spaghetti is already plural. A single one is a spaghetto.

You wouldn't say chineses.

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MyUserNameLeft@reddit

I honestly never even noticed I wrote “spaghettis” that is quite funny. I think autocorrect is having a laugh at my expense

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dirtymike401@reddit

I mainly said it so I could make a Dodgeball reference.

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MyUserNameLeft@reddit

There’s been 3 instances in the last month I nearly watched dodgeball again. If I had I would have understood the reference. I feel like I’ve let not only my self down but your fine self. My apologies

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dirtymike401@reddit

Don't be sorry, just be better.

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MyUserNameLeft@reddit

It’s never the anger that hurts the most. It’s the disappointment that really cuts deep…

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Gnomio1@reddit

Right?! Pasta and butter (with some black pepper) is great. Have a glass of milk on the side, why not.

This is monstrous.

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DrHutchisonsHook@reddit

I was horrified until I realized I was in the sourdough sub and then I became horrified again when I realized that no, you actually drank this nasty ass stuff

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Theprincerivera@reddit

This reminds me of the how I met your mother episode where Marshall takes an entire breakfast of sausage, eggs, pancakes, and syrup, blends it, and decides he’s gonna use that as his “quick fuel” for a marathon.

He vomits it almost immediately

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olivinebean@reddit

I used to blend cheesy pasta for old people, you got to start with milk and gradually add the pasta until it's just right

It can carry on cooking and runs the risk of turning back into a choking hazard so don't make the pasta al dente.

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Charming_End_64@reddit

Add vanilla, evaporated milk, sweetened condensed milk and blend it. You have a venezuelan chicha. Its a bomb of taste and carbs. Next time overcook the pasta, you can try rice too

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ssongshu@reddit

My brother in Christ have you ever heard of oatmeal???

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thisoneagain@reddit

The blending was a problem, but I actually think I might like milk-butter pasta; it would be like extremely low cost macaroni and cheese, like at a discount buffet, and that sort of garbage is my absolute jam.

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Worldly_Abalone551@reddit

Im honestly surprised that people have difficulty gaining weight

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mefista@reddit

интенсивное постсоветское желание молочной лапши усиливается

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Hitman_666@reddit (OP)

Но только не такой, я надеюсь

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mefista@reddit

Я думаю, у нас народ бы это стал. Я нет, но кто-нибудь)

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calembo@reddit

Sweet baby Jesus...

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00trysomethingnu@reddit

I’m desperate to know:

your body type at this very minute
if you’ve been told by a physician that your LDL is “crazy high, fam”

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Deflorma@reddit

And then he drank the pasta, sir.

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throwtheclownaway20@reddit

You gymbros are literally insane when it comes to food. Either you're eating nothing but boiled chicken and plain white rice as if seasonings & a Maillard reaction will wreck your macros or you're creating abominations like this because "fuck chewing" 😂

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temporarily_username@reddit

My man just made Chicha venezolana

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Decent_Piece_8620@reddit

lol that sounds kinda horrifying but also impressive in a weird way, how did it taste tho? like did it actually work or was it a total mess?

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NukesAndSupers@reddit

Bro, no amount of physique is worth this.

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Hitman_666@reddit (OP)

Well, i think that it was worth it, i achieved what i wanted

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OrderAgreeable5046@reddit

yo that's some pasta dedication lol i can't imagine trying to drink that, was the flavor at least decent? or did the semi-blend just ruin it?

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Hitman_666@reddit (OP)

It tasted buttery and the texture was a bit nauseating

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Goobygoodra@reddit

Try mac and cheese next time

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AreYouAllFrogs@reddit

That would make too much sense

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WillemDafoesHugeCock@reddit

Ah yes, bulking with, er, liquified milk pasta.

What happened to just Gastonning a bunch of eggs, bro?

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Hitman_666@reddit (OP)

I ate everything, this was a needed extra

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EitherChain7966@reddit

this is a whole new level of pasta eating lol, i can't even imagine the texture

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zamasu2020@reddit

Brother just Google "kheer" and make that. How can you make something so a unappetizing from ingredients that can make one of best sweet dishes

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mundus1520@reddit

It really isn't that hard to make food taste good. Yall just masochists

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Hitman_666@reddit (OP)

Cooking well takes time effort and energy. I didn't wanna waste my days cooking 5 meals a day, nor did i always have time to make one big dish for myself. So i chose violence.

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dnooup@reddit

Sounds like you need to work out your jaw muscles more

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Fit-Initiative3958@reddit

omg this is next level pasta struggle lol, can’t believe the blender couldn’t handle it, did you at least down it like a smoothie? or was it just horrific?

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Hitman_666@reddit (OP)

If i put too much in my mouth i felt like throwing up, the consistency was awful. I ate it with a spoon. It was moist.

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SennaBlanc@reddit

This a venezuelan thing called chicha, that could either be made with rice or pasta.

AND ITS DELICIOUS 🤣

https://tasty.co/recipe/venezuelan-chicha

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fallsstandard@reddit

That was an adventure into shitty food I was not fully prepared for but I salute you.

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RadarSmith@reddit

My dude, there are better foods to bulk with.

A+ post for this sub of course haha.

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