Restaurant workers, what are your thoughts on diners who dine alone at your establishment?
Posted by 1whoisconcerned@reddit | AskUK | View on Reddit | 206 comments
Sometimes, I will go to a Miller and Carter, say, and order a full three course meal with drinks. The full works. I’ll tip generously too because we’re all in it together. The wait staff are always pleasant and nice but what are your thoughts behind that smile. Are you laughing at me?
PolarLocalCallingSvc@reddit
When you travel for work, you quickly realise how many people and how normal it is to dine out solo.
Nobody cares :)
mcmanus2099@reddit
Yup. I typically take a book with me I read. Just to underline that I am away on business and trying to make the most of an evening.
Todays-Idiot-Award@reddit
Yes. I do similar. I bring a sign that reads "Im on a business trip and trying to make the most of an evening"
Maybe I should just bring a book instead because I didnt know thats what it meant.
I just thought that it was a book that that person was reading.
Mind blown
mcmanus2099@reddit
Feel free to scoff but firstly I like to read, second it signifies comfort more than being on your phone, it also gives a pretty decent sign you brought the book to pass the time and are not expecting anyone, i.e. you are not being stud up by a date.
I just feel more comfortable walking in alone with a book and plopping down for dinner. I have books on my phone I used to read but it didn't feel right, my book feels like a shield against awkwardness.
Todays-Idiot-Award@reddit
You should care less about what people think.
Maybe this book would help?
You could take it out for dinner with yourself by yourself
mcmanus2099@reddit
It's human nature to care about what others think. It's a trait that helps succeed in life too, which is why so many ppl have it. If I stopped caring about what ppl think I'd perform worse in my job and have fewer friends. It's part of the drive I have to be dilligent, communicate well and set expectations.
Todays-Idiot-Award@reddit
I didnt say not to care, I said you should care less. To say you like reading, youve not done a good job there.
I dont think its working out for you, like you think it is. Buy the book
mcmanus2099@reddit
What I said applies the same for caring less as it does not caring at all.
And the book you linked doesn't say care less it says stop caring at all.
Seems like you don't know what you're trying to say
Snoo_23014@reddit
I find people are more likely to interrupt me when I am trying to read!
"What you reading?"
"Nothing now, I'm apparently talking to you..."
HomeworkInevitable99@reddit
Yup. Hotels are full of us.
Mispict@reddit
I was away for a course over valentine's weekend, it didn't really occur to me that restaurants would be full of couples. I went to a lovely tapas place and they put me in the most obvious place in the middle of the restaurant. I could feel the pity from the other customers. It was very awkward.
nick_gadget@reddit
Two colleagues of mine were staying away for a project and only connected that it was Valentines dining when the waiter sprinkled rose petals on their table 😂😂
Lucky they both saw the funny side really, that sort of thing must keep HR people awake in their crypts…
Mispict@reddit
Extra stars for the crypt comment ⭐⭐⭐
PolarLocalCallingSvc@reddit
I must admit, being out solo on Valentine's Day would probably make a lot of solo diners quite self-conscious!
But I still stand by nobody really caring.
Mispict@reddit
Yeah, I think people just felt sorry for me because I was all alone. I was actually in a relationship, I just happened to have to be away with work, which didn't bother me either because I'm not a big valentines day type.
PolarLocalCallingSvc@reddit
We don't do valentine's day.
I'm Welsh, and we celebrate St Dwynwen's Day instead. It is far less commercial and more focussed around going for a walk along a beach, making each other love spoons, etc.
Unfortunately my partner is Scottish and I live in Scotland and it clashes with Burn's Night, so it can be hard to make the two of them work!
AvatarIII@reddit
Make a love Spoon inscribed with "Fair fa' your honest, sonsie face"
StoneyMiddleton@reddit
I had similar except I was dining with a colleague 30 years older
spinningdice@reddit
Lucky you got a table I guess, a lot of places get fully booked out for valentines.
Agreeable_Ad7002@reddit
I totally get that and if I went a solo trip somewhere I'd eat out for a meal on my own no issue. However if I'm staying local I'd feel like a pratt going on my own somewhere as well.
ineverseenanything@reddit
I’ve worked away for many years.
I always make a point of going out for dinner. Nowhere is lonelier than a hotel bar.
Like you said - nobody cares!
90210fred@reddit
And a diet of hotel food isn't exactly healthy
AvatarIII@reddit
A diet of food from any restaurant isn't exactly healthy either. The goal of restaurant food is to be delicious, not healthy or even nutritionally complete.
Evening-Web-3038@reddit
Yep!
In some ways I trust the chain hotels (work makes us stay in them) when it comes to food because they usually have good portion control, so you know roughly how many calories etc.
A restaurant, on the other hand... sometimes it's a lot less clear how bad the food is. And there is a correlation between tastiness and the amount of shite in it...
90210fred@reddit
You're right of course, although I would argue that a hotel should accommodate both needs. Works canteens are supposed to deliver the nutrition etc needed but I think that's drifted away now but I certainly worked "away" jobs where on site catering was healthier than the hotel's food.
StigitUK@reddit
Had occasion to be spending multiple weeks at a hotel for a job, went through the menu quite quickly. Got on well with the hotel staff, by week 4 the kitchen team offered to make me whatever I wanted - simple, lighter healthier meals. I was so happy - as were they at tips :)
Evening-Web-3038@reddit
I don't mind the hotel bar tbh. It's cheap usually, no queues for drinks, you can grab a people-watching window and just play on your phone/watch videos all night.
Very chill!
Jambronius@reddit
This is too true. I always feel for those people in the hotel bar, with their laptop out a pint, eating what's effectively a microwaved lasagne.
Whenever I am away I always try to eat somewhere local, although i usually head for something more casual, just a highly rated burger bar or something. Then just wonder around. I've had some great evenings on my own in random towns and cities.
ineverseenanything@reddit
Absolutely agree.
Annoyingly - my new company doesn’t allow us to expense meals outside of the hotel. We get an allowance at the hotel bar.
The only plus side is - I don’t have to work away much anymore…
ParticulateSplatter@reddit
That's so weird, why does it make a difference to the company where you eat, assuming the allowance is the same?
Cynic in me says they've done a deal with specific hotel chains and part of that is mandating spending on the hotel premises...
ADJB23@reddit
Why would they not? Cheaper travel and food expenses, guaranteed bookings for the hotel. Win-win from a business side of things
kipperfish@reddit
Yeah that's how it works. It's cheaper for them to pay for room and meals at the hotel than it is to pay for room + expensed meal.
And they'll get better rates the bigger they are.
AvatarIII@reddit
I don't think that's cynical to think that. Getting a deal would be the pragmatic thing to do.
freeride35@reddit
Id guess you’re spot on.
No_Ring_3348@reddit
Close but too cynical: hotels offer good discounts to corporate bookers, this extends to the food.
ineverseenanything@reddit
Not sure - they book our hotels and I imagine it’s easier for expensing purposes if hotel an food is on the same receipt…
ClumsyPortmanteau@reddit
I worked in a hotel bar while I was at uni and we had some guests who'd be in the hotel two nights a week, every week. You'd get to know them and what they like, you could tell who was a more seasoned business traveler, and they were always polite and friendly. One guest even went out for my supervisor's leaving do as it was during one of his stays. Some liked to just sit at a table, have a burger and a pint with headphones on, others are and drank at the bar so they could chat to us bar staff and to each other.
misskittygirl13@reddit
You venture to the bar!!!! Locking yourself in your room with a bag of tins and snacks way better.
Tao626@reddit
I always make a point of finding some nice or weird little restaurant and going out of my way for it since it's on the company.
I once fucked up and went to a stupidly fancy place Google maps didn't do justice for. The company didn't care, it's just not my kind of thing. Surprised I wasn't denied service walking in wearing my scruffs compared to everybody else.
I usually go for "pub lunches" but try to avoid any of the chains since the food is always so bland, especially if it's a Weatherspoons (always pisses me off when somewhere is a Spoons in disguise). These places are usually filled with couples and families, but they're far too busy with themselves to give a shit what I'm doing.
If I find some absolutely novelty, I'm going there no matter how shit the food probably is. There's an Aztec pirate dinosaur themed place in Yorkshire at The Hive (outside the zoo). Food is mid, but I got to eat next to dinosaur animatronics and the bar was a pirate ship. This is still my favorite place just from how dumb it is.
PsychologicalDish430@reddit
Exactly, perfectly normal. I find people weird who think this is weird, they obviously don't travel far or a comfortable in their own company.
voluotuousaardvark@reddit
Did it last night.
I work all over the country and the company puts me up in a hotel and pays for my meals.
I think its funny when they take you to be seated and theres a corner of the restaurant full of little tables with one bloke sat at each.
dervish666@reddit
I came here to say this, when working away one of my favourite things to do is take my kindle, have a great meal in peace and not talk to anyone.
It did feel odd at first but I realised no-one cares.
Da5ren@reddit
Me too. It’s great, Especially after a long day in the office or at a conference.
Lunaspoona@reddit
This is true. Once they know I'm there for work they usually know I'll want the recipet and they automatically remove the service charge without me even asking them to.
Its not like the US where they remove the extra plates and cutlery and make it obvious, which I find bizarre of them to do.
g0_west@reddit
How come they remove the service charge if you're there for work? I'd have thought if you can expense it then if anything you're gonna be more generous with the tip
mas-sive@reddit
Most company expenses exclude tips. Also, most places you can only spend x amount a day on meals. So they probably got told a few times to take off the charge as the expense won’t get approved, I’m guessing.
Lunaspoona@reddit
Exactly that, expenses don't include tips. For my company we get £33 for a 24 hour period. I am much more likely to leave them a personal tip for doing that, I imagine they've had similar in the past as well.
mas-sive@reddit
I usually keep my work badge on (info concealed of course) and they did the same, let me lick a table in some places too which is nice.
elf_n_safety@reddit
You licked it, so now it’s yours
Wino3416@reddit
Why can’t it be both?
Broccoli--Enthusiast@reddit
Yeah I used to work nights ans got used to do lots of stuff on my own during then day, then I started a new job and had to travel once it twice a month
All I will say is, the cinema is best experienced alone at 10am on a Tuesday
AvatarIII@reddit
Cinema alone at any time is great. Monday evening is good because a lot of independent cinemas have cheap ticket Mondays.
Mistehsteeve@reddit
This! When I was away for work I dined alone in the hotel for ages because I thought it'd be weird anywhere else. Now I go out and enjoy my food. No one cares.
Snoo_23014@reddit
I live near a Kurdish restaurant that always smells incredible and when I walk past, the plates look mouthwatering.
Never been in there as I have nobody to go with and it's always couples, families or groups of men.
You know what? I'm going in on Friday.
nothingandnemo@reddit
Where is this Kurdish paradise?
Snoo_23014@reddit
Hyde Park in Leeds.
Bigbadgergnocchi@reddit
Oooooh what’s it called?
Snoo_23014@reddit
Dewan. Very popular place!
Bigbadgergnocchi@reddit
Will have to check it out!
Snoo_23014@reddit
Also if you do, when you are done, head up to the asian supermarket on the corner opposite Grand Mosque. They do amazing Arabic bread and sweets. Their fresh naan(over a foot and a half in diameter!) are only 25p each!! Fresh coriander bunch is 75p, bird eye chillies are 40p a bag.
If you like tasty, spiced food and cooking, its heavenly!
Ballistic-Bob@reddit
Enjoy … I’ve discovered a great Japanese Cafe near me .. I treat myself every Friday afternoon now … not only am I the only single guy I’m the only non Japanese too Staff are always so good and friendly though… I moved table last week as a family came in so I shifted to the breakfast bar area so they could sit together … The staff and even customers all thanked me and bowed . .. look forward to my Fridays now , and food is amazing.
Snoo_23014@reddit
Well if theres a guy in there eating mixed grills sat in the window by himself, come say hi lol
thegerbilmaster@reddit
What's it called?
Snoo_23014@reddit
Derwan, just up from Yorkshire TV studios.
WiggyDiggyPooPoo@reddit
Just up for m YTV is not Hyde Park. Could still be a good restaurant though.
Snoo_23014@reddit
My address is Hyde Park LS3 and I live just up from the ITV studios. Ain't Burley, ain't Woodhouse. Hyde Park. Brudenell is my local.
Gerbilpapa@reddit
Great song
Love Weird Al
Ill-Appointment6494@reddit
Go for it, Snoo. Hope you enjoy yourself.
Eastern_Job_4746@reddit
Kurdish people are mega friendly especially if your buying their food. Just go in you won't regret it
Snoo_23014@reddit
To be fair I am already pals with a lot of folks in the Kurdish community and they all tell me to go in!
wowsomuchempty@reddit
Update post!
PinacoladaBunny@reddit
Enjoy it!
If you’re ok with just watching the world go by then you’re good, if you’re a bit of an awkward soul by nature (I am!) then I’d recommend taking a book or something along those lines to occupy that restlessness. I’ve sat in restaurants listening to podcasts through earphones, or read a book, before now. Nobody cares, but I find it stops me rushing my meal through the restlessness, and actually being able to relax and enjoy just being there alone.
noradrenaline@reddit
Also useful for showing you haven’t upped and left if you need to go to the bathroom during your meal! A book is a really useful thing to carry.
PinacoladaBunny@reddit
Haha yes!! 😂
Fetch1965@reddit
That’s the way. Dont wait for others to join you. I don’t and I have plenty of friends. And best part, you can order what you want
Enjoy -
Snoo_23014@reddit
Cheers. Ironically I know the owner too!
InfiniteComedian7172@reddit
Go for it mate.
charlytune@reddit
Ahhh I'm jealous! I used to have a Kurdish neighbour who lived in the flat opposite me and when I qas going through a really difficult time, every now and then he would knock on my door and say 'I've made too much food for my friends can I bring you some leftovers" and then would come nack with a mound of rice, a bowl of beef stew, bowl of chicken stew, loads of salad, and a plate of pastries. He didn't make too much, he made extra for me. He moved to a new neighborhood and we lost touch but I will always remember his kindness and his amazing food.
wildflower12345678@reddit
Good for you, if I was nearer I'd join you. 👍
ImThatBitchNoodles@reddit
You're probably going to feel a bit odd the first time, but it's nice to enjoy your own company. :)
ImThatBitchNoodles@reddit
You're probably going to feel a bit odd the first time, but it's nice to enjoy your own company. :)
1whoisconcerned@reddit (OP)
Do it. 👍🏼
AnnualLongjumping473@reddit
Good for you 👍🏾
aberdoom@reddit
I love the idea that people are worried how they’ll look to others by having the audacity to eat food at a food eating place.
Free-Fig1258@reddit
Table for 1 in the Chinese on valentines night was the low light of my time working away for a prolonged period.
Payne_by_name@reddit
While most people don't care, people watching is a known thing so the notion that people's eyes are passing over others and not making a judgement or assumption is just silly.
Yes, many people live in a self important bubble but there are some who can lift their eyes from their phone and cast them round a room to evaluate what they see.
Deep_Banana_6521@reddit
Worked in restaurants since I was 14. Solo diners are usually better than people in a big group. Usually you get kind and responsive conversation from them because they don't see the staff as an inconvenience. Mostly it's people on business/work or somebody who likes what you're doing. Bigger groups tend to involve people who don't give a shit about your business and just want to dictate what they want.
A chef always prefers a single cover ticket, a barman prefers a single drink and waiters prefer a single customer.
Don't worry about bribing with a tip, this is the UK, wages aren't amazing but you don't need to feel obliged to double our hourly contracted wage just because you didn't bring anybody else with you. Your money is just as good.
hereinerror@reddit
My first thought is you will be a nice easy table, I'll remind myself not to forget about you (sometimes you can get caught up dealing with bigger tables and forget to pay attention). No other thoughts about you personally or why your eating alone.
Necessary_Delivery80@reddit
Who gives a shit what they think? They’re strangers I don’t know why you care
Da5ren@reddit
I LOVE dining alone when I travel for work. I take a book with me. Nobody will ever make me feel weird about it.
-myeyeshaveseenyou-@reddit
I’ve largely worked fine dining, I’m a pastry chef. My first though if we have a single diner is that they could be a Michelin or rosette inspector. No one is laughing at single diners
I am single as well and frankly love to eat on my own, and other things like concerts, cinema etc, not trying to keep another person happy at the same time as your self
PinacoladaBunny@reddit
I’d not considered the inspector angle! I suppose it could be anyone..
-myeyeshaveseenyou-@reddit
They don’t always dine alone anymore so it’s not always a good indicator but a single diner definitely always raises an eyebrow snd a check of the name as s lot of inspectors are known as well
1whoisconcerned@reddit (OP)
Yes I’m banking on them thinking I’m a reviewer.
SpudFire@reddit
Take a notepad and occasionally jot down a few things. Especially after the first bite of each course.
Snoo_23014@reddit
Yeah and then after you have paid and everything, show them the fantastic limerick you just made up!
IntrinsicPalomides@reddit
Was about to say the same thing 😃 the notepad is key, don't do this on your phone/tablet, but an actually paper notepad.
Unless you have something awesome like a Supernote Nomad/ReMarkable Move.
Azirru@reddit
I often dine alone, never thought it would be an issue. And now after reading this post and all the comments I know I was right, which is nice 🙂
Formal-Proposal7850@reddit
When I was a waiter, I used to love solo diners.
They’re not chatting so they know what they want to order quickly.
They’re not usually getting plastered.
Even when they take their sweet time, we can turn their table quickly cos they’re not gabbing for two hours.
They’re quiet, pleasant, and quick.
richbun@reddit
Everyday there are thousands of workers away from home dining out alone. There are also many people happy with their own company and not put off eating alone. If youmtip on the UK and don't complain, they'll be made up. Simple as that.
AnyOlUsername@reddit
Whatever food allowance work are giving me, you can be absolutely certain I am treating myself to a fancy solo dinner using every last penny of it.
IllMaintenance145142@reddit
As everyone else is saying, nobody cares. I cannot remember the last time I was in a restaurant and saw someone else being there alone because it's so unnoteworthy, and I think that's the same for most people
Howfartofly@reddit
I totally like going to restaurant solo, eating nice food and listening to audiobooks. As socialising is sometimes tiresome, i often choose not to invite anyone, even if I know there are people who would gladly join. Any other day, when i feel more sociable, i go with company.
SebastianTheKicia@reddit
Why would we laugh? I’d much rather wait on you than watch a couple that clearly shouldn’t be together bicker throughout the whole meal.
Some people just cannot stand being on their own or associate it with being a Billy no mates. Absolutely nothing wrong with going out solo - I have done it many times and so have my friends. One of them goes to the pub with his Kindle every Sunday. If you love yourself, treat yourself well. This includes comfortable shoes, trips to restaurant or cinema, or full fat yoghurt with fresh fruit for breakfast.
g0_west@reddit
Pub and a book is a great way to get myself to read more. If I'm sat at home I'm gonna get distracted by something 99% of the time, but if I just take a book and a pair of headphones to a pub, I'm gonna sit and read it for at least an hour.
UnusualGoal8928@reddit
You may be surprised at how little of a fuck strangers give about you.
They may vaguely remember the tip, if its as generous as you say.
g0_west@reddit
They give as much of a fuck about you as you give a fuck about the random person you walked past sat outside Costa earlier today (ie they barely even registered as notable for you)
Joshthenosh77@reddit
You order do imaginary friends ?
straightnoturns@reddit
I love them.
daz1987@reddit
I would imagine that whatever the establishment they are happy for your custom. You're a customer and you're helping keep that business going.
Pizzagoessplat@reddit
I don't care
Why would I?
DeadRockstar123@reddit
I can’t speak as a waiter, but I travel a lot to the same remote place for work and they are used to me eating alone and watching a podcast in the corner, to the point where last time the bloke said ‘ahhh, cheeseburger and a table out the way again mate ?’ Yes, yes sir indeed.
I don’t think they care if am honest…
Budget-Bandicoot2136@reddit
No one gives a toss
SnooStrawberries2342@reddit
They're only laughing at you if they're awful people.
And if they're awful people, why do you care?
Jennifer1991__@reddit
As a Chef, I'll say, give me 100 tables of 1 over 5 tables of twenty any day of the week.
refundpackage@reddit
Absolutely no need to tip. Don’t bring that over here please.
1whoisconcerned@reddit (OP)
It’s already here. Been here for years
refundpackage@reddit
It’s here by choice. There’s no need for it. The more it’s done the more it’ll become as expectation.
1whoisconcerned@reddit (OP)
Don’t be a Scrooge. You can’t take it with you you know.
OptionalQuality789@reddit
Bud, you deserve better than Miller&Carter.
strooplard@reddit
Only M&C sell fillet steak
OptionalQuality789@reddit
All of their food comes from the same suppliers.
M&C being the only one that sells fillet steak doesn’t really mean anything.
It’s a rip off for the quality of food.
Nameis-RobertPaulson@reddit
Thats like saying that Tesco finest is the same as Tesco value though.
There's undoubtedly shared products e.g. peppercorn sauce, but they also buy different grades of meat, aging and smoking etc.
In terms of a steakhouse it really isnt that expensive either, especially with the regular deals and vouchers you can use.
OptionalQuality789@reddit
They price themselves up there with high quality steakhouses but do not deliver the same standard of food. Not even close.
I was super disappointed the only time I went.
You can read on Reddit from people who have worked there about how the food is prepared. Lots comes in pre-made and is just warmed through to serve. That’s not what you expect at a premium restaurant.
CautiousJump3942@reddit
I rarely dine out, but if I do, it’s usually alone as my friends have busy schedules, I have an equally busy schedule. I sometimes have my children with me. I am actually a waitress and I don’t think anyone who works in the hospitality industry has any right to judge or look down on any customer, unless that customer was being unreasonably horrible and difficult.
So no, they’re really not. And if they were, they’re just not nice people in their general life, so that won’t affect anyone else but themselves.
Don’t worry yourself about it.
LibrarySoggy6644@reddit
Perfect customer, knows what they want order pretty much as they sit at the table, and no fuss. and none of the faffing around when it comes to who is paying the bill, not have to do multiply payments, they eat ask for the bill and leave. don't sit at the table for an hour after they have eaten.
ice-lollies@reddit
I’ve waitressed loads in my life before.
No. Nobody’s laughing at you. It’s much more common than you realise and nobody is bothered. If anything, it’s a good thing because it’s easier.
surejan2017@reddit
i worked as a waitress for years at restaurants, bars and pubs. never gave a second thought to anyone dining in or having a drink alone (neither did my colleagues) in fact, it actually gave me the push to do the same because i quickly realised that no one gives a second thought like at all… even people who are in groups or a pair; younger, older, whatever, they pay no mind either. everyone really is just in their own world all the time. and the likelihood is, after one regular glance, no one will really notice you again unless of course you cause a disturbance of any kind.
i once had a regular who would come in every tuesday and sit in the same window seat and order food and a drink whilst reading a book. she was lovely, kind, respectful, and very polite, just no hassle at all! she was one of my favourite customers to be honest
ElizabethHiems@reddit
People aren’t thinking about other people or judging them as much as we think.
I_ALWAYS_UPVOTE_CATS@reddit
"When you're 20, you worry what everyone thinks about you. When you're 40, you no longer care what anyone thinks about you. When you're 60, you realise that no one was thinking about you in the first place."
MobiusNaked@reddit
And when you’re 80 even you aren’t thinking about you
Eoin_McLove@reddit
I hit this point at 30. Nobody cares about you as much as you think. It’s not even negative, it’s quite freeing.
I_ALWAYS_UPVOTE_CATS@reddit
Same tbh. I realised that far from me being special, everyone else probably broadly feels the exact same way about daily interactions as I do - if I don't give a fuck about someone eating out by themselves, chances are most other people don't either.
ElizabethHiems@reddit
Well crap that means I must have been 60 when I was 35. So I’m 69 now.
I_ALWAYS_UPVOTE_CATS@reddit
Nice.
ShowMeYourPapers@reddit
I'm 60 and if I'm in town for work, I'll have a decent meal out on my own. Being at an invisible age can sometimes be perfect.
DellaMorte_X@reddit
I’ve worked over a decade in hospitality and we couldn’t care less if you dine alone.
I had done so many a time and had some of the most interesting of times going out by myself.
Should be no shade whatsoever.
WhenyoucantspellSi@reddit
I'm a cook in a diner with an open kitchen so I can see pretty much everything going on in the restaurant. I thank God for single tables because they're less work for me, but that's it. I usually only get a small percent of tips so large tables mean a lot of work for no extra pay off. For example I once had a table of 40 come in, spend a grand, then tip £10, of which I got £1. Who cares if you eat alone, the only one analysing the situation is you.
r1Rqc1vPeF@reddit
I worked away for years so eating out alone became normal.
My wife passed away a few years ago now therefore if I want to eat out (as I did yesterday for my birthday) I don’t have another option.
Never felt that I was treated any differently.
Ilsluggo@reddit
Have always enjoyed dining alone, even in my hometown. Don’t care if it’s a bar with a book, or white tablecloth restaurant. It allows me to focus on the food or whatever I want. Only drawback is most restaurants don’t have many/any half bottles of wine, and by the glass adds up quickly.
freeride35@reddit
If I didnt dine alone I’d starve.
Temporary-Zebra97@reddit
Never gave it a thought when I worked in restaurants beyond thats an easy table and remember to give them a VAT receipt or offer to switch drinks for starters if they were civil service.
Never felt uncomfortable when I traveled with work and ended up eating solo, in fact always made a point of going out to explore and escape the hotel and see what I could find, ended up having some amazing food and some great nights out.
Highdraulixs@reddit
People who dine alone are a true blessing. We are not laughing at you.
jasmith2706@reddit
In a lot of cases we are probably jealous
Ergophobe470@reddit
If I'm alone in a restaurant and think someone's staring at me, I assume they're thinking "wow, look at that guy eating alone, wish I had the guts to do that!"
lv4998@reddit
i worked in a chain restaurant near to a train station - so many solo diners and tended to be the ones i'd have the best conversations with. made me realise no one cares that you're on your own and i now dine solo quite frequently :)
KingArthursLance@reddit
Bring a notepad, and you’ll get the best service of your life.
Megthemagnificant@reddit
How is Miller and Carter? My husband and I are moving to Muswell Hill in June and I have been curious.
pvieira777@reddit
I normally think the person is whole & secure,
I like eating, drinking out alone sometimes, it is peaceful & you can gather your thoughts, relax.
I like listening to conversations because people interest me, I’m curious without being directly involved, gets me thinking what’s going on in your life, why do you think like that, could have done this or that, humans are interesting
X4ulZ4n@reddit
Dining out alone are some of the highlights of my week!
I'm sat in a pub now having lunch on my own browsing reddit.
nanoDeep@reddit
I work in restaurants and it's very common. I wouldn't think anything of it. I always ask solo diners if they need a receipt as very often they're travelling for work and need a receipt for tax/expenses reasons
TomLondra@reddit
what is a Miller and Carter?
Adorable_Orange_195@reddit
The only people who think it’s unusual are co-dependents who can’t imagine going anywhere or doing anything by themselves.
I’ve been dining, going to the cinema, days out, holidays solo since I was in 6th form and love it. The only thing I don’t like doing is going to gigs or night clubs alone & that’s just personal preference.
So much so that even when I’m in a serious relationship I always make them aware I will continue to do those things, don’t get me wrong I’ll also go places with friends, a partner, family etc but my solo stuff is also prioritised.
chicken-farmer@reddit
My daughter is often in hospital, and when that happens I travel to stay nearby. The restaurants and the people therein help me massively. I've never felt weird about it. Just very very grateful.
Lupo1@reddit
Genuinely, if you're behaving yourself you're considered a godsend.
Mysterious_Fox_8058@reddit
As an ex member of waiting staff at an establishment similar to what you have described, trust me there is no reasonable reason that wait staff would be laughing at you. I can tell you from experience that they will have experienced all sorts of weird and wonderful things.
I worked at a really nice place and I dealt with really entitled z list celebrities, chaotic funerals, a work do that turned into a mass brawl. A well behaved single diner who tipped well would be a dream.
murrayflew@reddit
When I worked in hospitality I loved serving lone diners, they would usually offer up good conversation and typically were the least fussy or demanding.
Enjoying your own company is a great skill to learn, it’s happened to me over the last few years and I’m so grateful for it!
weekedipie1@reddit
Worked away for years and just went to a spoons for a veggie burger and chips with a pint , no one batted an eyelid
TedBurns-3@reddit
Rather than ask and get a multitude of irrelevant answers, be happy in your own skin and don't worry what others think.
Will it stop you enjoying yourself?
I used to work for 111 and the gossip about patients and their ailments is discussed way more than expected- and a lot of behind the scenes piss taking!
CompetitionNo3466@reddit
I’ve defo had people commenting on me when eating solo at restaurants, potentially less common in more rural areas idk.
Wino3416@reddit
Reddit is utterly obsessed with this. I work away a lot and I eat out aaaaaaaall the fucking time. Nobody gives a tuppeny shit. I was sat in a lovely restaurant in Leeds the other week and noticed that three other people around me were on their own and tapping on their laptops in between courses and we all stayed at the bar after our meals. I spoke to a couple of them, and I mentioned the Reddit thing, we all thought it was hilarious. I can only assume people go to weird places where for some reason staff judge single diners, or Reddit skews both young and socially awkward so it’s an issue because of that. I have a family and friends I adore, but I bloody love time on my own when away, and even more fun if it means I meet new people. It DOES still happen, Redditors.. people do speak. Maybe I should go on some of the incel/virgin/omigerdimsolonelyandtherearenothirdplacesanymore subs and recommend working away occasionally. I’ll probably get lisped at for being “pwivilged” and told that the average person in Bwitain earns 5p a week and isn’t allowed to travel, and that I’m obviously in the top 1%, should be set on fire immediately and we should all have UBI. I love those subs. “Does anyone else look at couples and think how insane it is that people have sex all the time and think it’s normal? I’ve not been outside since 2015, but this isn’t the reason I think like this”.
Somebloke164@reddit
Funny. I’ve never had a problem eating alone but I dated a woman who did everything she could to avoid it. She felt like everyone in the room would judge her for being friendless and pathetic.
…she had a lot of issues.
notactuallyizzy@reddit
When I worked in hotels with restaurants attached, I always absolutely loved looking after people travelling and dining solo. I enjoy to do a lot of stuff on my own, and it's nice to make an effort for someone who is doing the same :) zero judgement, often just admiration!
PoorLittlePicklePest@reddit
It's funny that people on Reddit think that doing stuff alone makes them sort of trailblazer, going out to eat, to the cinema, to shows etc. alone is so normalized these days it's nothing out of ordinary at all and nobody bats an eyelid.
pompombum@reddit
Ive worked in bars and restaurants and didn’t think anything of it.. lots of people eat out or drink in pubs alone.
g00gleb00gle@reddit
I work away and eat out by myself, they don’t care
BG3restart@reddit
As someone else who dines alone, I'm quietly supporting you. I meet so many people who don't go out because they don't have anyone to go with and I feel sad for them.
ProfessionalGrade423@reddit
I was a server for many years and I can tell you that nobody cares if you are alone. I never heard another server mention someone dining alone either. It’s literally not something that registers in your mind. Sometimes people are alone and they still need to eat. Lots of regulars eat alone and that’s not a big deal either. Some people don’t like to cook and they live alone and so eat alone. Please enjoy your meal out without worrying that people are thinking about you being by yourself, they genuinely, 100%, are not judging you.
MaxMouseOCX@reddit
My guy, are you honestly worrying about this?
They aren't, they don't care - and if they are laughing at you, who gives a shit; fuck them - you're there for you, not them.
Silver_Procedure_490@reddit
I always admire people like this as I tend to lack the confidence to do the same.
Certain-Pass-6551@reddit
Any time I've seen someone eat alone (the very few times I've actually noticed) I just always assumed they were away from home for work etc.
SipNpet@reddit
I used to go out to eat a few times on my own and found it an incredibly freeing experience. The same when I went to go see a movie on my own- no one to spoil my opinions on the movie, no need to force a laugh or reaction.
When I used to be a server growing up in the states, seeing 1 person solo happened all the time. I used to say “just 1?” if I was seating them at the host stand. Until one day a gentleman said with sadness in his voice, “just me.”
So then when I’d see solo diners I’d always say, “1 today?” As if it was the standard, the expectation that people can dine alone without feeling any type of judgement.
KingKhram@reddit
No one cares and everyone has to eat
AdaandFred@reddit
I worked away for several months last year and went out to eat on my own about once a week. It didn't seem to me like the workers cared, I read my book while I waited for food, quietly ate and drank, paid my bill with a tip, and went away again. I can't see where any issue would be.
EUskeptik@reddit
It’s a good few years ago but I was in Bournemouth on business and went to a small but highly recommended restaurant for dinner. They had no tables free but asked me if I would mind sharing a table with one of their regulars.
I thought “Why not?”. It turned out that the guy had been a business colleague of Denis Thatcher’s and had endless tales to tell. He kept me amused for a couple of hours! 😂
Normally I would just eat on my own, shunning others’ company. I was always comfortable with that, but that evening in Bournemouth was a revelation. The food was fantastic too! 😁👍🏼
-oo-
TermAggravating8043@reddit
Not in the slightest.
Most of the time it’s people travelling who’ve stopped to get something decent to eat and get out the car fir a bit. Sometimes it’s someone waiting on others or until something finishes, sometimes it’s a women at the end of her tether which just wants some undisturbed peace, sometimes it’s about old man who doesn’t want to eat alone but he’s got no family.
The last one always breaks my heart a bit and I make a point of having a proper conversation with them, they’ve usually not long lost their wives and they just want the company.
Suitable-Season-4847@reddit
I'm married, have kids etc.
But I LOVE dining alone sometimes. When I go away for work it's my favourite thing.
very_unconsciously@reddit
Same - I do enjoy a nice business trip, decent hotel, top notch grub, and especially when someone else is paying.
I dont, however, like travelling. Planes and trains are just boring and uncomfortable. Even in first/business class.
sunheadeddeity@reddit
God, same. A good book and a nice unhurried meal by myself with no cooking or washing up. Heaven.
WhalingSmithers00@reddit
It's quite common and no one thinks anything of it.
In fact a lot of regular solo diners were the chillest customers. Maybe people in groups work themselves up into making things to bigger problems than what they are.
Pyrocitus@reddit
Literally nobody gives a shit, people travel for work and people need to eat regardless of company. You need to deconstruct your own mental idea of eating somewhere other than at home being something you only do with other people.
Accomplished-Fun3896@reddit
Head waiter here - I like it, you know what you want and I don’t have to do much in terms of service/checking on you. Most of the time people bring a book or read a newspaper. Personally, I like going to the cinema by myself… Each to their own
PetersMapProject@reddit
I used to travel a lot for work and so I'd assume you were on a business trip.
Although occasionally people get funny ideas into their heads. I stayed at the same B&B two or three times for work and the owner asked if I was visiting my boyfriend in the nearby prison...!
ImThatBitchNoodles@reddit
I can actually answer this from both perspectives. As a waitress I used to enjoy serving single diners more than multi-tables. Always nice, non-demanding, respectful and patient on busy days.
As someone who dines by themselves sometimes, I don't feel awkward about it at all. I take a book with me or just doom scroll reddit while I enjoy my food. I, too, leave a hefty tip because if you made my day better, I will make yours too, and I know how hard the job can be even if from an outside perspective is just carrying plates and taking orders.
MoblandJordan@reddit
I was traveling for work once and had just got off an overnight flight and had 5 hours until my train for the next leg. I found a really nice restaurant near Bloomsbury, came with a small suitcase they put it away for me. Had 3 courses and coffee over 3 hours while I was on my laptop for a bit, read a book for a bit, and had the literal best time.
Silent-Tea4500@reddit
I worked in a Frankie and Bennies and it was pretty common, lots of truckers and guys w laptops getting breakfast or late dinners
Never thought it was weird, but maybe because it was a more casual restaurant
Fraggle_ninja@reddit
Why would they laugh at you? Are they insecure teenagers?
Ok_Wrap5233@reddit
Nobody cares.
When you think about it eating is such a weird thing to feel we need to do with other people anyway. To me being with other people means talking. Why would I want to pair that with mashing up food in my mouth?
Silver_Emu4704@reddit
Right but when you eat out you spend maybe 10% or less of the time actually mashing the food in your mouth. The rest is waiting and chatting. If I dine alone I don't know what to do with my eyes, don't wanna be staring at other diners.
Perfect spot for solo dining is a window counter so you can people watch. Worst is a tiny 2 person table crammed between two other couples.
Paul2377@reddit
I think it’s not that uncommon. Some people travel solo either for business or pleasure and you’ve got to eat.
yessuz@reddit
Quote a lot of single diners would be people on business trips
Prudent-Pressure2146@reddit
Former waitress- I truly don’t care what anyone is up to as long as they are pleasant, and I go for food myself solo too.
According_Sundae_917@reddit
Think what a cultural assumption it is that people must dine in groups. Why? There’s no good reason that should be the norm. It’s nice but it’s sort of bizarre to believe ‘I can’t possibly dine alone’. You do at home right?
According_Shoulder14@reddit
If they're laughing at anything it's someone who goes to a Miller and Carter
Gareth_Keenan_army@reddit
Why would the staff at Miller and Carter - laugh at someone for going to Miller and Carter?
GrimQuim@reddit
Because they know how shit M&C is.
Far-Sir-825@reddit
Because they know better than anyone how shite it is!
GrimQuim@reddit
For 'the full works' too, OP must do a great job saving up his pocket money.
Kezly@reddit
"You'll care a lot less about what others think about you when you realise how seldom they do"
David Foster Wallace.
Honestly, people don't think about you at all. Or me. Or anyone. Unless you cause a scene they'll have forgotten you were ever there five minutes after you leave.
ChipCob1@reddit
Just don't bring your own large plate to the buffet.
DaveBeBad@reddit
Today I learned that if I ever get divorced (or widowed) I can’t go to eat out again until I get a new date…
And when I work away I have to starve 😂😂😂
leclercwitch@reddit
I love dining alone. I love doing most things alone. I have a partner and I love doing things with him too but there’s something special about taking yourself for dinner!
mondeomantotherescue@reddit
Miller and carter - must watch https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=J9n0_5p8XKo
PaulaDeen21@reddit
They were always friendly and a pleasure to serve when I used to do it.
Psychological-Bag272@reddit
I used to be a waitress for many years. Most of the time, I was too busy rushing off my feet to even care about the number of people on each table. I also dine alone sometimes. I honestly don't see an issue and don't get why anyone should see an issue with it.
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