Vertical baths
Posted by afungalmirror@reddit | CrazyIdeas | View on Reddit | 121 comments
Like a shower cubicle, except once you step into it and close the door, it's completely water tight. Then you fill it up with water up to your neck and wash yourself like that. Less relaxing than a bath, but a good use of space if you only have a small bathroom.
Grand-wazoo@reddit
A perfect way to increase accidental drownings by 1000%.
hashshash@reddit
just put a ladder on the wall
Kaporalhart@reddit
and a sticker that says "no drowning allowed"
Fuzzy_Schedule_2858@reddit
Heavy petting okay ?
CheetahSerious7169@reddit
It's a sign that says 'no drowning' but you turn and there's another sign that says 'be based'
thatG_evanP@reddit
And floods
Icy_Huckleberry_8049@reddit
one tiny crack is all it takes to start a flood
Weary_Swordfish_7105@reddit
And flooding bathrooms by 10000%
Nickelplatsch@reddit
I would love this so much!
sidaemon@reddit
Something similar to this is quite popular in Japan.
Snowfall_19@reddit
It works be so hard to wash your legs and feet. And shaving!
medicated_cornbread@reddit
They have standing baths for handicapped people.
Amazing-Visual-2919@reddit
I've seen sitting baths. Never standing ones. What's the handicap?
medicated_cornbread@reddit
Straight leg syndrome.
Jimxor@reddit
And sitting baths too. Although I've heard they take way too much time because they have a door that must stay closed while filling or emptying.
DentinQuarantino@reddit
Not necessarily while emptying...
Jimxor@reddit
Heh. Flushing the baby out with the bath water, so to speak.
CptCheez@reddit
Depends how fast you want it to empty.
afungalmirror@reddit (OP)
Those probably have all kinds of safety mechanisms and useful adaptations. My idea has none of these.
Noogie_Power@reddit
🤨..🧐..🤔..😑...🤣
medicated_cornbread@reddit
So your crazy idea is to take an already invented idea and make it worse.
afungalmirror@reddit (OP)
12 upvotes already.
crumb_factory@reddit
the people have spoken
IceLopsided4190@reddit
The next step is clearly to pitch this on Shark tank.
l3tmeg0@reddit
You want to put sharks in there as well? The drowning hazard isn’t enough for you?
Monsterpiece42@reddit
The sharks tend to not like tanks or tank variants. I wish OP the best of luck.
noveltymoocher@reddit
just fill your garbage can with the hose in the summer it’s basically the same
Megalocerus@reddit
That would be chilly. And tippy.
TransitionalAhab@reddit
Oh I’m sorry, did I accidentally click on r/SaneIdeas?
bsknuckles@reddit
dangerous doesn’t have to equal worse. It’s just a riskier version. More thrill for adrenaline junkies 😂
GIDAMIEN@reddit
Or better yet make it impossible to sell cuz it will never pass any kind of regulation in that kind of state.
unknown1893@reddit
Hey, the sub isn’t r/goodandusefulideas
BrunesOvrBrauns@reddit
I'm sorry I thought this was Crazy Ideas
SirAlthalos@reddit
idk that sounds like a crazy idea to me
Brandoncarsonart@reddit
It being worse is a matter of perspective. It would likely be an improvement to some people.
NativeMasshole@reddit
Add in some jacuzzi jets and I'm sold!
Megalocerus@reddit
It just needs the walls to not go up too high. Same as a bathtub but deeper. Could have a seat in it.
edgarsh@reddit
I pictured you saying this with optimistic pride
EatYourTrees@reddit
How do you know what OP looks like?
shponglespore@reddit
Safety third!
Blinky_@reddit
It seems like they’re just taunting them at that point
Prestigious_Beat6310@reddit
Water gets up to your neck, all warm and relaxing. Then you rip ass and it bubbles up to the little headspace left above the water. You start gagging, get a mouthful of water and drown. It's listed as a fart related drowning event. Almost nobody attends your funeral, as word spread and you quickly became known as "Fartboy". The shower/bath company caught wind (lol) of this and sues your family for the bad publicity caused by the whole "Fartboy" thing.
NikonShooter_PJS@reddit
This is exactly how Queen Elizabeth died.
rosylux@reddit
I almost just snort-laughed my baby awake
BrainyCaveman@reddit
Be happy you didn't fart-laugh.
cabronfavarito@reddit
Man how did we get here
mmlickme@reddit
sues your family lmao
Mackheath1@reddit
Yep, the chronic FRDE crisis - I lost a friend that way.
OneGladTurtle@reddit
You visiting from r/MonkeyPaw ?
Emotional_Deodorant@reddit
Instead of standing and waiting 20 minutes for your "bath" to fill up, why not use the water to wash yourself as it's filling?
A.K.A. a shower.
halflucids@reddit
I think they could improve the shower just make it like a car wash, have sprayers in all four directions on tracks, blasts you head to toe with water, soap, water then air dries you. People car wash is the future
afungalmirror@reddit (OP)
Do you know what sub you're on?
Emotional_Deodorant@reddit
First time here?
Every post has discussion/criticism of the idea. See all the other comments in your post for evidence of this.
afungalmirror@reddit (OP)
Discuss yes, criticise rationally no.
Emotional_Deodorant@reddit
Sorry, this might not be the best sub for you going forward, then :)
afungalmirror@reddit (OP)
I disagree.
Emotional_Deodorant@reddit
Good for you!
No_Smile_2619@reddit
They do make sitting baths for the elderly and disabled
RustfootII@reddit
Sooo, a barrel?
idekl@reddit
Every time I showered in my parents' small square glass standing shower I wished I could just plug the drain and let it fill to my neck. You have no idea how much Ive wanted this too
gc1@reddit
Bravo. This is a the perfect blend of unhinged and plausible within the laws of physics. It's not hard to imagine an alternate-universe society where baths are vertical and showers are horizontal.
idiveindumpsters@reddit
How can you wash and rinse if you’re standing in water up to your neck?
dcm3001@reddit
That is going to be very claustrophobic or use a huge amount of water. You can tolerate a bath because the top is open.
Even if you imagine the top being open for a 6’6” person, a 5’0” person is going to be in a panic inducing tube of death.
IFollowtheCarpenter@reddit
I would worry about getting accidently locked in.
Also I would much prefer a normal shower.
Moist_Rule9623@reddit
So instead of using 2 gallons per minute in my shower, say about 15G per day…
…you want me to use what I estimate at roughly 360 gallons of water, which is seven times the capacity of my hot water heater, and which would weigh just a tick under 3,000 pounds on the second floor of my 100 year old house?
goombagoomba2@reddit
It's more of an alternative to a bath than a shower. Everyone knows showers are more practical
SirTwitchALot@reddit
Look up Japanese soaking tubs
hashashin@reddit
Yup, they take up less space but you can immerse your whole body. Most Western tubs are so shallow I can only get about half my body under the water at a time.
PJenningsofSussex@reddit
What if you made it like a sumo wetsuit
WildcatCinder1022@reddit
“Less relaxing than a bath” bro I would never leave. That sounds heavenly to me.
millionwordsofcrap@reddit
I would kill for a full-body soak as hot as hell that goes all the way up to my ears, but also I have safety concerns about the vertical cubicle design as described...
PomeloPepper@reddit
My claustrophobia would like a word.
Cookie_Doughnut@reddit
I like this. Except no door. Unless your bathroom has a floor drain.
whatdoyouknowno@reddit
New fear unlocked
BudTenderShmudTender@reddit
Anyone else remember the infomercials for the walk in baths?
exceive@reddit
The water pressure at the bottom could be an engineering challenge.
derekclysdale@reddit
It's certainly a crazy idea. I always prefered the ceiling bath idea, which I used to apply for the Dragons Den TV show a few years back. It never got anywhere because the problem was the water would just fall out whenever you tried to fill it.
exceive@reddit
Just have to angle it a little and get it spinning. Don't have to spin the tub, just the water.
NoobOfTheSquareTable@reddit
Well, that isn’t a total loss
That is now a bad shower
afungalmirror@reddit (OP)
I'm in for 10 million.
Perfect-Berry2022@reddit
Charmed episode with abraxas Season 3 i think Lol Not a good moment for prue
aHumanRaisedByHumans@reddit
Call it The Prestige line. Best model called The Great Dantón!
namiraj@reddit
It’s the least painful way to…bathe.
nofear78@reddit
It us called "shower".
StarrySundaeSmile@reddit
You invented a bathtub that also doubles as a panic room.
7-Inches@reddit
And a suicide box, just kneel down
mmlickme@reddit
Slow and painful please!
3WordPosts@reddit
Are you saying I couldn’t do the same in my regular bath?
revolvingpresoak9640@reddit
Downward faces dog is less convenient than kneeling.
Particular_Cut_6933@reddit
If you had said “are you saying that I couldn’t do the same in my regular bath” it would have been an accidental haiku
Fun.
JungleCakes@reddit
Sign me up
GIDAMIEN@reddit
This is already a thing. Wow it's like Google doesn't even exist or something
Special_Watch8725@reddit
Eh, standing up is a pain in the ass. Either have a bench, in which case you’re just taking about a deeper hot tub, or else have some feature to make the liquid neutrally buoyant, in which case you don’t have to support your body weight— a vertical sensory deprivation chamber if you will.
YetAnotherInterneter@reddit
Crazier idea: an upside-down vertical bath for bats 🦇
seaclifftonne@reddit
So the soap just rinses away before can touch the skin and my body moves slower because of water resistance? Alright
ThatThingInTheWoods@reddit
Right this would be my issue
brockclan216@reddit
They have those. They are made for the elderly. Google walk in tubs.
Comfortable-Bike8646@reddit
Imagine the water bill.
sawtooth1649@reddit
I like it! And maybe the water has jets, so you are getting washed while standing in the device?
AssistanceChemical63@reddit
You would have to jump in from the top because all the water would pour out when you open the door.
DBSeamZ@reddit
No, you’d have to wait for it to drain when you’re done before you can leave
Extreme-Network6857@reddit
Have it at ground level and step in? Kind of like a pool
afungalmirror@reddit (OP)
Correct.
not_nott@reddit
this sounds like a great intentional feature to me because it means the bath drains almost instantly
aHumanRaisedByHumans@reddit
Just be quick
Maxpowrsss@reddit
So a cold plunge with warm water?
RainbowUnicorn0228@reddit
I thought this was the 10th dentist for a min.
I_NEED_YOUR_MONEY@reddit
https://www.homedepot.ca/en/home/categories/bath/bathtubs-and-showers/bathtubs/walk-in-bathtubs.html
Not_A_Wendigo@reddit
Those exist. My first apartment had one. It was okay actually, but the gaskets started to fail and it leaked.
Letsgoblue212@reddit
I occasionally do this in the summer when we go to the cabin… in the lake.
AtrumAequitas@reddit
That’s how you get bathroom ghosts.
thehonestchild@reddit
Like this? https://www.facebook.com/share/18byfDfViG/?mibextid=wwXIfr
Anubis-Hound@reddit
isn’t this an actual form of torture
serenwipiti@reddit
This already exists.
YetiBoney@reddit
Captain Ron did it first.
405freeway@reddit
That's some final destination shit
soundman32@reddit
Watch any afternoon TV adverts. Walk in baths are popular for older people.
fred1090@reddit
This. They definitely already exist.
havron@reddit
I've been in a hot tub that was functionally sort of like this. It was a smallish round tub with a normal rim for people to sit, but the middle was super deep and had just enough room for one person to stand up in and touch the bottom with their feet while the water went up to their neck. It was interesting, and sort of fun. I guess you could just dig a deep narrow hole in your bathroom and install a tiny tub that fits.
aHumanRaisedByHumans@reddit
Call it The Prestige line. Best model called The Great Dantón!
zoppaTheDim@reddit
They have those, advertised to old ladies who don’t want to slip stepping over the rim.
What next, a motorized wheel choices more like a scooter or a chair which helps you to stand up?