Not sure how serious this is but certainly mean; made horrendous comments about my becoming a parent 2 weeks postpartum whilst also wondering why I aren’t talking to her..
Let's un-abbreviate that for a sec.
"wondering why I are not talking to her".
It just isn't right. You'd want to say "am not" (and certainly not "am't"!!)
My younger brother is a germaphobe and I apparently used to lick all of the sweets (both mine and his? so my he wouldn’t eat them. And also go and rub my bare arse on his pillow so he was scared to go to bed.
He still loves me and I’m a far nicer person now!
My sister has BPD and is very very difficult, so since you asked for "non serious", I'll leave her out of this. But my brother once wrote my name on the furniture in permanent marker to get me in trouble. He's also thrown an apple right at my face before. He used to hide my shoes. That sort of thing.
My brother is 4 yrs older. He used to terrorise me as kids. He would wind me up, make me so mad then when I tried to hit or kick or bite him he'd put his hand on my head keeping me at arms length so I couldn't reach him. I broke my very strong wooden hairbrush once over his arm. He also pushed me in the river age 4 and I nearly drowned. Him and my sister once put put a load of drawing pins on a box (pin up) and made me sit on them naked (going for a bath). We get on ok now but he and my older sister were really mean to me. I hated having siblings.
When staying with my Aunt my brother would team up with our cousin (boy same age) and torment me. One time they fixed the light pull over my bed so that when I pulled it to turn the light on to see what they were up to a fake spider swung down and hit me in the face
My brother and I used to fight like cat and dog when we were kids. Mean words were said, fists thrown, even each other thrown off chairs etc.
But since our dad died 4 years ago we’ve been like this 🤞🏻 which is great.
We still wind each other up from time to time tho lol
I used to get nosebleeds a load as a kid. One time I was bleeding over the utility room sink and my brother came up and blasted me across the nose with a supersoaker.
My brothers used to tell me when the andrex advert came on that at end the end of the ad they’d kill the puppies and turn them into toilet paper! Imaginative little scamps, we’re the best of friends and still love teasing one another now we’re in our 30s/40s
I’m 35 and my brothers 30.
He still flicks my forehead and “punches” me whenever we meet. When we lived together at my mums he’d come into my room, knock stuff over, turn the lights off, then fart in the door, close it and hold it closed so I had to Dutch oven in his stench.
He’s a ratbag and I love the bones of him.
My brother I think, hated me for some reason. Was never nice to me, was verbally abusive, yelled a5 me all the time, even punched me in the mouth when I was 6. Being goofy, just hugging him, Bled like crazy and knocked my tooth out. Been dead 10 years now. He was my oldest brother. Miss them both, but not the abuse and emotional abuse.
If he wasn’t my brother I don’t think we’d hang out. He’s the complete opposite to me, but despite the age gap we’re really close.
I haven’t lived with him for nearly 10 years and I’m still relentlessly bullied by him.
My brother wrapped me up in a rug then took me to the bin outside, put me and the rug in there, then told my mum i was in the bin because I’m rubbish.
We had this dilapidated caravan in our paddock and my brother used to lock me in the broken toilet (pitch black too) and the “game” was me breaking out. He did this mostly when he had friends over and I wanted to play with them 😂
He died a month ago, suddenly, and I don’t know how to live the rest of my life without him. Love you bro.
I’m the mean one in my story - Me and my older sibling, told our younger siblings that multiple coins were more valuable than their one £1 coins. Example 3 x 5ps 2x 2ps 4x 1p was a great swap for their 3x £1 coins.
And used this to convince them to swap their money and we’d spend it on sweets. Evil.
I shot my brother in the leg, from about 3 foot away, with a BB gun, just to see if it worked. I’d never seen anyone get into the fetal position in midair.
While I slept he put bubble gum in my hair.
He partially cut the slats on my bunk bed so when I laid on it I fell through, I was about 13 at the time, had to sleep on a mattress on the floor for nearly a year.
I cut his favourite Thundercats action figures up, and posted them back to him.
As adults
We had a heavy night out in London and on the last train home he fell asleep. I screamed “Haddenham” really loud at him and he jumped up and ran off the train. I’ll remember the look on his face when he realised he was in High Wycombe as the doors closed for the rest of my life. It was… perfection.
He stained a massive smiley face in the lawn at mine whilst housesitting for me.
I repainted his living room whilst feeding his cat. No idea why his wife didn’t like dark aubergine for the walls, took me ages to paint the skirting boards pink too.
I’ve signed him up for loads of stuff before so he gets weird post. BDSM club membership with catalogues.
The amount of For Sale/To Let signs we’ve put in each other’s gardens is mad. He spent 5 years living abroad, he surprised me announcing his return by putting a For Sale sign in my garden. I got up, saw it, realised who would’ve done it. Went to the only hotel in the village i lived in and checked him out, so he had nowhere to stay.
Couple of years ago our car was getting a flat tyre. I knew exactly who it was, so I made sure they were inflated, and put dog poo on the caps. Had a 2am text from him, two words “sick bastard”
During lockdown our bin was stolen one day, it was returned a few days later, completely filled to the top with concrete that had set.
I bought a wheel clamp and clamped his brand new car.
At his wedding I hired a mariachi band to come in and disrupt the first dance.
I used to hide a weird voodoo looking doll in his house, it would be in random places, take him ages to find it.
There’s more. We’re both nearly 50 and I can’t see us stopping any time soon.
This was quite a few years ago
Younger sister (1yr) had a bit of a rash and I felt Sheila's getting a bit too much attention from our parents.
So in my 3yr old wisdom decided to cover her head ro toe in sudocreme - I'm mean COVERED. In her eyes, ear canal, nose. The whole 9 yards.
This resulted in a hospital admission to remove said sudocreme, giving her more attention and having a total opposite affect on what I was trying to achieve.
We are best friend now but I do still threaten to cover her in said creme when she annoys me
Had a narcissistic abusive mother who favoured my brother and punished me every time he did something wrong, he cottoned on to this and enjoyed it so much he joined in with the school bullies and made my life a complete misery. Ditto with step family - step bitch was evil and hated the fact dad had a family before meeting her and couldn’t have kids with her - her daughter was perfect (obviously) and my brother got to extend my misery even further by teaming up with my stepsister to exclude and bully me. Siblings are over rated. So are some parents come to think of it.
I was once asked to watch my younger brother in the bath for a few minutes while my mum needed to do something else. For some reason, I didn’t want to so was most put out by the request. I think I was about 6-7 so bro would have been 2-3.
My bro is the most easy-going, placid, good-natured person you could meet, even now, and he was an incredibly ‘easy’ child. He’d just do whatever you told him. I told him to stand up (in the bath), then I poured some bath water onto the cork bath mat. Said to bro, “right, when mum comes in, whatever she asks you, just say ‘yes’. Ok?” Bro nodded. At this point, I hollered down the stairs, “Muuuuuuum! Bro’s just weed on the bath mat!” Mum came upstairs, saw bro standing in the bath with a puddle on the floor and said to bro, “Name, have you just weed on the bath mat?!” As per instructions, bro proudly asserted, “yes!”
He was immediately removed from the bath and told he was a naughty boy. I did feel a little twinge of guilt when he started crying cos, obviously, the poor little chap had no idea what he’d done wrong!
I did own up to what I’d done years later (prob in my twenties) and my mum actually told me off! I was much better with our youngest brother and all three of us are incredibly close. The incident with middle bro was quite out of character (I think!) 😂
Out in the woods, my sister needed a wee. I crept up behind her and stung her on the arse with a bunch of stinging nettles, wrapped in my hankie. We are both in our 60’s, love each other and little bro (55) to death. Very close and all 3 of us dial in on a Friday on FaceTime for drinks and catch up, as sis lives in France, although we spent 7 weeks together recently, camper vanning in Scotland.
I was 3, and we went to Spain for a winter sun holiday. My brother who was nearly 6 pushed me in the deep end of the swimming pool and I nearly drowned. Luckily, another guest saw what happened and dragged me out of the pool (it was the '70s, and Spanish holidays were uncommon then. Benidorm was basically closed in the office season)
All in good fun, but....
My brother, little scamp that he is, had become a special constable - was showing how the handcuffs work and asked me to volunteer. We were at my parents house, in their kitchen, they have an AGA. Little bastard handcuffed me to to the oven and buggered off to take a shower. For those who have had to stand near an AGA for any length of time will know the heat is not to be trifled with.
That was a decade ago and I am still plotting my revenge.
It's a brand of oven, they use open flames to heat them, so they can't be turned off like modern oven can and just pump heat out constantly.
The brand still exists, but they use gas and electric now.
Since i can never resist, here's the [Wikipedia](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/AGA_cooker) page for them
I went to a house party once and put some chips in their AGA. Because we didn't know how the hell to use it, the chips were in the oven for 3 hours and still came out uncooked!
I will never get one for my own use just because of that one experience.
My younger brother likes animals. So much so that my cat left home because he used to carry him round by his neck under his arm, then he pulled my gerbil's tail off. For his final act, he killed a friend's hamster.
Didn't turn out to be a psychopath (that I know of yet!)
I don’t know if this is mean
But we used to get the quilts out the quilt cover and slide downstairs haha , it only seemed mean wen we’d get in trouble and I’d get the blame lol 😂
My older brother filled my bed with moths. The heavy covers kept them in place until I climbed in, when they came flying out. At the time I wore a full length nightie to bed and at least a couple headed straight up
The late present thing sounds like me tbh, I reckon late presents are better than no presents and most have too much on the day to appreciate them properly
When I was 11 I got a huge Valentine's Day card (lke A3) from a "secret admirer" and I spent months wondering who it was from, only for my brother to reveal it was a orchestrated by him and my grandad. I was so embarrassed because I'd even asked my male friends if it was from them.
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