ULPT Wifes friend gossip almost ruined my marriage

Posted by Xinauser@reddit | UnethicalLifeProTips | View on Reddit | 66 comments

Basically this girl I used to date years ago made a photoshopped picture of me on Instagram flirting with another girl, sent this to one of my wifes friend, knowing it would get to my wife.

Im not even mad at that crazy person, seeing that she made similar attempts to ruin my life over the years, I expect this kind of behavior from her.

Im mad at my wifes friend who arranged a meeting with my wife, and proceeded to tell my wife repeatedly that she should divorce me after showing her the photoshopped picture, knowing it might very well be fake.

This led to a full blown argument that lasted for hours, until I proved to her it was fake and then finding out the picture came from her.

Thing is we are in a very difficult time in our lives and that didnt help at all. We are both transitioning jobs and working 60+ hrs week, and our 3 year daughter was sick, and we lost a nights sleep in the middle of it all. Theres more, but I wont bother.

I was thinking of doing the same shit to her, like creating a fake profile and flirt with her husband, just so she can have a taste of her own medicine.

Is there a better way or am I too bitter?

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LoudAcid-@reddit

Tbh OP, I’m all down for revenge but it sounds like doing something like that RIGHT NOW is not the best idea given your situation with everything changing and having a toddler in the mix.

Stabilise. Calm down. Sit on it, and let it stew. Let that friend think it’s fine and the coast is clear.

Then consider if you’re really mad enough to shoot at the messenger friend that has your wife’s best interest at heart and doesn’t want your wife getting hurt, or the psycho who played into the friend’s care and proactive attitude for your wife.

In the mean time consider sending that friend something like “hey I appreciate you looking out for [wife] and her well being, but you did cause us a lot of stress with this situation on top of everything we are already currently going though. This could have been avoided if you checked the source or included me in the conversation. “

By the time you calm down you’ll either have a clear field to get revenge on the friend, or realise you should be going after the psycho ex that is actively trying to ruin your marriage.

revenge is a dish best served cold

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brainhack3r@reddit

Then consider if you’re really mad enough to shoot at the messenger friend that has your wife’s best interest at heart and doesn’t want your wife getting hurt, or the psycho who played into the friend’s care and proactive attitude for your wife.

If your wife has a friend that is ONLY friend with her then that's a problem.

Why didn't she bring this up to the HUSBAND first or better yet mind her own fucking business.

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growdontshow5@reddit

So you bring it up to the cheater first so they can get a good story together and say it never happened. I get minding your own business, but if you are truely friends with someone, you say the stuff that needs to be said. If you don't, and it turns out to be true, all you are is an accomplice and shi*#y friend.

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jimjamj@reddit

the messenger friend that has your wife’s best interest at heart

OP states the friend "[knew] it might very well be fake", suggesting that in fact she had her own motives, and was not holding his wife's best interest at heart.

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growdontshow5@reddit

Op never states how he thinks his wife's friend knew it might be a fake (not definitive proof). OP also has no idea what was said between wife's friend and wife. Could have been something as simple as "if he is cheating you should divorce him". Hell practically everyone on Reddit would say that. Same with being a friend and telling someone they might be getting cheated on.

I have friends who were with me before I married and after our divorce. They were friends with my wife during our marriage and still somewhat friends with my ex now. If something like this came up during our marriage I would expect them to come to me first. Sounds like OP is just pissed that someone told his wife something he didn't approve of. I get its a bad time for them, but its a bad time to have that conversation at all.

I like the fact that OP glosses over the real person that started it saying he expects it from her. If that is so, why not do something to try and stop it?

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Verified_source_@reddit

Best served 6 years and 205 days cold. From my experience at least

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Xinauser@reddit (OP)

Thank you

satandk@reddit

Pour surströmming in the front grill of her car. The smell will be stuck in the ac system and make her projectile vomit

JTD177@reddit

I knew someone that poured Deer lure in to the cowl vents of a car, the owner trued airing it out. Then just got rid of the car

Blahblahman23@reddit

If you do this, make sure to wear a thick mask that blocks smell. Possibly a spray painting mask. Once you OPEN that can, the smell will radiate like nothing you’ve ever smelled..

pronouncedayayron@reddit

Why is this even a thing? Who buys and eats that? It sounds so disgusting.

LeafsWinBeforeIDie@reddit

Be prepared to throw away any clothes that get hit with spray

OneApprehensive327@reddit

I tried something similar ..Lutefisk. Vile!!

ExcentricaGallumbits@reddit

If only there was a way to make a piss disk but use surströmming instead of piss 🤔

There is a LOT of freezable fish juice in those cans

Inveramsay@reddit

Just freeze the whole can, minimal smell until it thaws

EdgeLordPrime859@reddit

You're getting actual good unethical advice with this one OP.

OresamaWagamama@reddit

Picture or it didn't happen.

Ifinallyhave@reddit

Tbh if she made more attempts to ruin your life, gettibg revenge will only make her do worse or try to play the victim. I love pissdisks but doing that with that woman will bite you back because of the way she is.

First make sure you're safe from her bullshit.

Then put bouillon cubes in her lawn to attract animals. If that doesn't work sign her up for scientology.

ScaredSafety3755@reddit

Scientology, Jehovahs and Mormons. It would be a revolving door of white shirts asking about a higher power in your life.

ArtsyDarksy@reddit

If anyone did that to me, I would just tell them all to come over at Friday 5pm to discuss my official enrollment in their cult. When they arrive, idseat them all at the same table, then geab beers and popcorn.

Don't forget Hare Krishna

KJParker888@reddit

And life insurance brokers!

Now that’s just plain evil.

dr_cl_aphra@reddit

Calm down, Satan 😆

CuteAssTiger@reddit

I would usually never suggest this but I would want her to break up all contact with that lunatic.

No way is that a person anyone should be friends with . That's just evil

itsboomer0108@reddit

No, this is exactly what he should do. My (ex) wife had a friend who tried to break us up. They went to spend time together, and the “friend” had a guy over specifically to get my wife to cheat on me. My wife was told she’s not to talk to her anymore.

Unknown_Cloud_777@reddit

File a restraining order against this lunatic. Nothing is more embarrassing than that, plus it will protect you from future harassment.

Ozmorty@reddit

And a piss disk under the door obviously.

Piss directly into her gas tank

MarleysGhost2024@reddit

Or motion activated sprinklers.

AbruptMango@reddit

Piss disk in the envelope with the papers she gets served.

Raggedybabe@reddit

A restraining order against the crazy ex won’t stop her from being in contact with his wife’s gullible friends

Wa1ker1@reddit

File a restraining order against the friend.

Leave the piss disk out of this, it’s innocent!!

MyScrotesASaggin@reddit

This. Doing this will also give you more credibility going forward if she does anything else to try to meddle.

Ready-Zombie5635@reddit

You are mad at the wrong person. You should be mad at the ex not the friend who was looking out for your wife. Yes she got it wrong but the ex is the instigator.

No_Set1418@reddit

I think the best way to drop the hammer on this lowlife would be for your wife to tell her their friendship is finished.

PhotoPossible8570@reddit

how did you prove the photo was fake?

LunaSails007@reddit

OP is bsing , he 100% did it and now trying to use this sub to get ideas on how to gaslight his wife

blueberryraspy@reddit

Agree!

You need to address your wife's relationship with her friend. Your ex was behind it all, but your wife's friend actively tried to end your marriage.

Don't go after your ex or your wife's friend, make your wife take ownership of her relationship with her friend. "Yes, honey, we're under a lot of stress, and you're hurt. Your 'friend' did this to us on purpose. Why is she still in your life after she did that to us? I'm hurt that you even still talk to her." Cutting off the 'friend' and making your ex one more step removed from your life is a double win.

petrichor1017@reddit

Most sane advice and route to go

motionmatrix@reddit

I know this is ULPT, but why haven’t you taken her to court? This is literally the definition of harassment and emotional abuse. You stand in front of a judge and drop a couple of tears about how that woman almost destroyed your entire relationship with your wife and daughter, and let the court chew her out.

SeriousMonkey2019@reddit

Agreed. Best revenge is your ex’s finances. Sue her for falsehood. If she doctored an image and conspired to ruin your marriage you should sue them both. Go talk to a lawyer and explain all of it to them.

I’d push to sue, even if you ultimately drop the case it will freak both of them out. Force them to hire lawyers and pay retainers to their lawyers to fight the lawsuit.

Personally, I wouldn't go after the friend at first myself, I would use the discovery from the lawsuit against the ex to tell me if the friend was like "OMG that pig! I gotta talk to Brenda right now!" or if she was a malicious asshole.

illicitli@reddit

wow what was sex like with that girl ?! she sounds really hot in a toxic way LOL

PrivilegeCheckmate@reddit

I would worry about pushing her poor husband over the edge. He's gotta be close to it if this is his wife.

PeterVanNostrand@reddit

If someone from years ago is fucking with you, they are likely a full on sociopath or psychopath and they want a response. If you respond, it will just make her do crazier shit. It will only escalate. The only way to win is to completely ignore it. Have a meeting with wife’s friends to just ignore anything from this person. They’ll get bored and focus on ruining someone else’s life and then you’ll be free.

Shimegami_Z@reddit

I'm confused. You're not mad at the woman trying to ruin your life repeatedly, but you're mad at your wife's friend for trying to inform and protect your wife?

We need more info on why you think she thought it might have been fake.

I'm sure we can all think of tons of ethical AND unethical tips to get back at psycho ex. But, you're totally okay with psycho ex repeatedly trying to ruin your marriage and life and instead focusing on trying to fuck with someone looking out for your wife?

Idk, maybe use her phone number and email to sign her up for " how to spot photoshopped or Ai images" or something?

torpidninja@reddit

For real, how is everyone focusing on the wife's friend that just wanted to protect her friend and not OP's lunatic ex that is actually harrassing him and causing the issues? This comment section is mind-blowing.

zzzelot@reddit

Is there another reason why your wife wouldn’t trust you? If the answer is yes, I got no advice. If the answer is no, you first need to stabilize (like other commenters said). You need to spend time with your wife. Vacation if possible. Once things are good between you two then you can put plans into motion.

Revenge is a dish best served cold so you have to wait and play the long game. Start with your wife, why does she think her friend wants to end her marriage?? Is she in love with your wife or with you? Is she a frenemy? Has she ever done or said anything shady to your wife? Get you wife to start to examine her friendship.

Once time has passed, IF your wife’s friend is still around, FAKE reconcile with her. That way if you get revenge it won’t be traced back to you. You will need to pay attention to her and gather information on where the “weak spots” of her life are. After that come back to this sub and you can get more detailed advice.

WhatchooWant2025@reddit

Not unethical but I would make sure you humble brag about how exciting/sexy/successful/wholesome life is in your happy family. The ex is trying to make you miserable. Make her drown in your and your wife’s happy.

avindictiveprinter@reddit

It's not unethical but I would definitely treat her like a child if she wants to do childish bullshit and tell her husband on her. On Facebook. Publicly.

3woodx@reddit

Restraining order. Easy to file no cost. Get it done now its on paper and filed with court.

I presume there may be legal recourse at some point. She is an absolute terd.

Hang tough with your wife. Love and eachother and show it. Picnic, a card single rose.

PomeloPepper@reddit

Check out the exact parameters of slander and libel in your jurisdiction.

Assmaday@reddit

Your wife needs to apologize and take accountability or else divorce

smilebig553@reddit

Glitter bomb

stabbingrabbit@reddit

Tell and show her husband how psycho she is and how obsessed she is with you. Show him what she has done to you over the years. Tell wife to get rid of "friend".

RandoRog@reddit

Bees in her car.

OverlappingChatter@reddit

So, lunatic, and wife's friend are friends? Is there any way to eliminate them both from your life? How close of a friend is the friend? Does wife see how problematic her friend was?

Anyway, I would do something serious (police maybe) about lunatic, and make a different Ai/photoshopped picture of friend every three days just doing absolutely ridiculous things until she confronted me and apologized for the original photo meeting.

Gucci_meme@reddit

Tbh your wife shouldn't be friends with her, it kind of reflects on her judgement.

Damage-Classic@reddit

Catfishing is never a good look.

iomegadrive1@reddit

You are both working 60+ hours a week? Who the hell is taking care of your child?

Granadafan@reddit

Leave a thong and/ or random lipstick in the wife’s friend’s car

Moist-Reference3092@reddit

What is your wife’s thoughts about the so called friend? Seems like a deep dive into who is an actual friend needs to happen to get rid off unnecessary hardships and potential heartbreak.

Honestly, I would go the ’humiliation’ route on this one. Don’t do an account. Call the husband. Tell him calmly what his wife has done and the problems that came with it. After all these years? She can’t let you go?

Can throw in a question on why she has time to do that instead of caring about her husband as well. Ask why is she so immature?

Imagine the embarrassment of knowing that your wife has done that? Would die. She will have her own little drama at home if her husband is normal in the head.

After some weeks you can slash her tires as well.