Should I make an annexe in my parents garden?

Posted by Apricots_68@reddit | AskUK | View on Reddit | 35 comments

I am in my early twenties and currently live at home with my parents in the south east of england (pretty expensive - just a short commute to London). My parents have a fairly large detached house with a pretty big garden in a nice area and have offered for me and my gf to build an annexe in the garden instead of trying to get onto the property ladder. This is completely their idea and they have mentioned it for years. Eventually, if we chose to have kids, we would swap and we would go into the house and them the annexe. Realistically, if the economy carries on how it is, I do not see me and my gf ever being able to afford a house like theirs, every bedroom is large with its own large ensuite and there are two living rooms. I know this is an unbelievable offer financially as we would only have the mortgage of the annexe. I just don't know if it is the best idea because my parents do get on my nerves and I would love to have my own completely separate place but the financial freedom of it feels huge. Obviously I have no experience in paying bills so any advice on whether it would truly be the best option would be great!

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TytoCwtch@reddit

You need to consider a few different factors:

1 - Can you legally build an annexe, what planning permission do you need, are there restrictive covenants in place etc? Are you talking about an annexe or an outbuilding? If it’s an annexe I don’t think you could have the mortgage on it in your name as it would legally belong to your parents so you’d need a loan instead but I’m not a lawyer so might be wrong on this point. If it’s an outbuilding that you own you might need a contract with your parents to use the land otherwise they could kick you out in the future. Are they charging you rent for land usage?

2 - Cost of building an annexe. Are you paying or your parents, what materials are you using, have you considered costs like architects, licenses etc? Who’s paying the electric/water/gas bills. Will it affect your parents council tax.

3 - Type of annexe and timeline. A wooden chalet can be built a lot quicker than a brick and mortar building but is a lot less comfortable in winter. My annexe is a converted garage and the insulation is not great so winters can get very cold/damp if I don’t stay on top of it. But a brick building will not be built in a few months, you’re looking at least a year or two.

4 - Your parent’s attitude. Will they respect your privacy or is this another way to monitor and invade your life. You know them better than anyone. Will they try and use this as a controlling method e.g. we own your home so you must do what we want.

5 - Lifestyle. Living in a smaller place can be cramped if you live with other people. I live in an annexe and have done for 5 years but I live alone, no partner, kids, pets etc. I live a fairly frugal introverted lifestyle so an annexe is perfect for me as I own little clutter and very rarely have guests. But if you have a lot of stuff or want to host regularly it’s probably not a great idea.

FOARP@reddit

"I just don't know if it is the best idea because my parents do get on my nerves"

Yeah, this is the point you should tap-out on. My own personal rule is to never, ever mix money and family if I can reasonably avoid it, and the reason for that is that family is very important but putting money in the mix can put relationships at risk. From the sound of it, this could well occur here.

Your parents could well end up getting cold feet about moving our of their house when you have kids. You could well end up wanting to move somewhere else. Your girlfriend could well end up finding the cheek-by-jowl arrangement with your parents - which would have to last DECADES - unacceptable.

From the sound of it this is something your parents have been proposing for a long time, but not something you actually want to do.

Chris-TT@reddit

I would be tempted if I got on well with them. I get on very well with my in-laws. We go on holiday together several times a year and I would consider it with them. In fact, we once did. But not with my own parents, who I can only handle in small doses.

Another thing to consider is if you have siblings. This could make you their full-time carer when they reach an age where they need help.

L-0-T-H-0-S@reddit

Since you're asking the question I think you already know the answer - no, don't do it. Though superficially helping you out its tying you to them in such a way you don't ever get to escape: you build the annex they're eventually expecting to move into for them, you're still technically under their roof being as the new property is on theirs. If they decide to sell their house, what happens to you?

And- when the time comes to swop - you're tied to looking after them indefinitely.

Its superficially generous, yes but understand what it is you're getting into. The cost of the annex itself where you are is the price of an entire house in other areas.

SimplyFootballNet@reddit

Depends on your relationship with your parents.

My mum unfortunately becomes intolerable to be around after 48 hours - she starts becoming a bully. Be careful not to lock into a situation you cannot get away from.

Neddlings55@reddit

Have you looked at whether or not you can get planning permission?

Apricots_68@reddit (OP)

Yes, we would be able to as the neighbours would not even be able to see it and it meets every part of the criteria

rheasilva@reddit

"The neighbours won't see it" is not a guarantee that you'd get permission.

It also doesn't mean they have not considered other matters does it.

I literally said it meets every part of the criteria?

spidertattootim@reddit

we would be able to as the neighbours would not even be able to see it

That is a very minor consideration for planning permission. Don't be assuming that planning permission is guaranteed just because you're neighbours don't complain.

TachiH@reddit

Ask your girlfriend what she wants. They are your parents, not hers. She might have an opinion she feels uncomfortable sharing.

Uhura-hoop@reddit

I’m no expert but that sounds like a great idea to me. You may want to drill down exactly who owns what, see exactly what planning permission allows and update any wills accordingly but on the surface it sounds brilliant. How would things like council tax work? Is it considered a separate residence?

DiDiPLF@reddit

Yes council tax would be separate as its a separate dwelling not an apurtance to the main house.

imtriing@reddit

Sounds like a real good way for your parents to get you to build an annexe for them and then, when they time comes to 'swap places', they'll instead want to downsize, or retire abroad, and sell the entire property with your annexe on it to boot.

Terrible idea. Welcome to life, we don't always get what we want (big house with two living rooms and an ensuite in every bedroom.. what's wrong with just using a bathroom? and do you even use two living rooms??) and shortcuts are usually laden with traps. You've already said your parents get on your nerves.. push forward at your peril, and that of your relationship too.

If they want a mortgage they will have to own the land so separate titles. I'd want the title in my name or at least jointly in my name if I was going to build a house. Bank would want it to be completely separate (own access and defined boundary) and capable of being sold if they didn't keep up repayments. And that would protect OP if the parents plans changed.

DB2k_2000@reddit

Building an annex will cost 150k even if you can get planning. Why don’t they just give you that for a deposit?

Beginning-Poet-2991@reddit

But you get the whole house for that instead of just deposit.

It would be a very small flat at very best. One of my friends looked at this for his mum but the costs were mad and it didn’t add that value to the house so was easier to just buy a flat elsewhere.

Do you? Or do you just get an uncomfortable cheek-by-jowl living arrangement in a small annex with a promise to the house at some distant point in the future?

moreidlethanwild@reddit

Ultimately the annex becomes part of the parents estate and property. OP mentions a mortgage so it’s possible the parents don’t have the money and would be borrowing it themselves.

No_Height_2408@reddit

presume because they still have to pay a mortgage

steveakacrush@reddit

How about you buy the current house off them for the price of the annex? Gets you out of the inevitable inheritance tax burden, you and your other half get a family home, and they can live at the bottom of the garden.

Alas_boris@reddit

I have friends in a similar situation. They pooled their equity from a house sale with the widowed in-law's equity from a house sale to buy a big house with a large annexe.

It is occasionally difficult with both physical and financial boundaries.

The friend now has kids, which is handy for childcare, but only marginally more so than if the MIL lived 5 minutes walk away.

The widowed MIL has found a new partner who is less comfortable living in an annexe with step kids and grandkids. He has his own family too, which I believe causes angst over the perceived split of his time. Ideally MIL + Partner would like to move in together full time somewhere but this is difficult as selling the house puts my friend in housing jeopardy.

My friend is in a very stable relationship, but if that happened to change then it could get quite messy.

Could another option be to build the annexe as planned, but rent it out to either a lodger (under the threshold), or AirBnB it (given the location close to London it could be successful for visiting families), and use the income from this to fund you either buying or renting somewhere?

Suskita@reddit

Lots of good points being raised here, I'll add one:

Who owns the annexe and what happens if only you or your parents want to sell? Not everyone would want to leave in an annexe in someone else's gardens or in a big house with an annexe in the garden the belongs to someone else.

If it's all the same property, then what if they want to sell it all but you want to stay in your annexe? Or if you want to leave and cash out what you paid in mortgage and they don't want to rent out the annexe to anyone's else?

Sounds like a good idea in theory but there's a reason why families don't all end up sharing massive estates with common areas and then swapping houses when some of the sub families need extra room.

BillyJoeDubuluw@reddit

If you get on well enough with them for it to work then go for it.

This was actually the norm before it wasn’t the norm, anyway…

I’ve got cousins in London bending over backwards towards afford to buy flats that look like Harry Potter’s cupboard under the stairs.

manhattan4@reddit

Getting permission for a self contained annexe (with washing and cooking facilities) is not easy. Planners do not readily approve them as it is seen as a short step away from just approving another independent dwelling.

You're wording this as an annexe but framing it as an independent dwelling - eg. discussions about a mortgage. You cannot get a separate mortgage on a building which is ancillary to the primary dwelling, as it has no resale value independent of the primary residence.

If you want planning and a mortgage then you most likely need to go for a fully independent dwelling, ie. carving off a piece of land from your parents to provide a new dwelling with independent access, utilities, ownership boundary etc.

Feisty_Baseball_6566@reddit

additionally if you are living in it the council will consider it a "dwelling". At which point you will be subject to council tax.

Getting it through planning relies on surveys, it should have all the amenities such as toilet, shower, heating etc. So at which point it will need electric and gas meters, water meters, it will need to be tapped into the drains and soil pipes etc.

And realistically - how big is it going to be ?. If you do have kids are you going to seperate part of the garden off ?. When your parents move out there are you going to separate the garden off etc ?.

You wont only have the mortgage of the annex though - a rough estimate i would say is you're going to need upwards of £10k plus for all the surveyors fees, architects, inspections and quotations from utilities just to get to something you can present to planning - then there is the subsequent amendments that will no doubt be needed.

Only after all of this will you have something you can present to the mortgage company - and remember they are lending against an approval plan and notoriously if you ask for £150k it will cost £200 as these never come in on budget.

Its a great idea, and a great offer - but it is by no means a cheap option, or an easy option.

DameKumquat@reddit

If they build the annexe and pay for it, great - even if they never want to move into it and instead insist on selling, there's a big demand for houses with handy granny flats (lots of people wouldn't want to share a house but would like to have elderly relative next door).

If it involves you paying for the build, then you definitely need your own solicitor and it would probably be easier to use the cash for your own deposit.

KnownAndNamed@reddit

I’d do that in a heartbeat but my parents are cool. I live 45 minutes from my parents and wish we were closer. Especially with a child, their grandson now in the picture.

McFigroll@reddit

Having your own place is just better in everyway. If they get on your nerves now, it wont get any better during the planning and building process. Set your bar lower for a first buy because expecting a large detached house as your first is ridiculous. Concerning an eventual swap, are you fine with spending potentially the next 30-40 years of your life living literally next door to your parents, to me thats sounds like hell.

Salty-Addendum-1977@reddit

You're in your early twenties? You change A LOT from your early twenties to your mid twenties to your late twenties. I am a completely different person than who I was at 22 (now 29). An annexe for now sounds great, build up some savings. But don't go in with the assumption that you and your current gf will live there and then "swap" when you get pregnant. Do you really want to live in the same place your entire life? Do you really want to live next to your parents your whole life? Does your gf?

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