Time to get even 🤣 Can you provide practical joke ideas please?
Posted by 192to144@reddit | AskUK | View on Reddit | 81 comments
So during Covid, March 2021 to be precise, my neighbour came around and let off a foil confetti cannon outside my front door as I opened it. She did this as a genuinely lovely gesture for my sons 9th birthday.
It's been 5 years. 5 YEARS! and I'm still finding the odd piece of this confetti. Today just randomly on my kitchen floor.
I've been joking for years that I'll get her back and I think the time has come. I'm clearly very patient so I am happy to wait for the right time. So if it means she has to be away for something to come back to find or a special occasion, I can wait.
Hit me with your ideas for revenge please. Obviously nothing that will damage anything but I want an impact!
rusticusmus@reddit
If you can get access to her coat, sew tiny bells into the lining.Â
192to144@reddit (OP)
Wow these are all fab. Thanks x
WordWizardx@reddit
Get a bunch of plastic easter eggs, put one duck in each, and hide them all over the exterior of her house and garden
Overall-Lynx917@reddit
If they gave an outside doormat and they're away for a few days, sprinkle it with cress seeds and water it.
El_Freako_Diablo@reddit
Buy a load of small plastic ducks, envelopes and stamps. Mail one every day. Nothing else. That alone will keep her confused for ages
ButteredReality@reddit
Have you seen the price of stamps these days? OP wants to be avenged, not bankrupted.
vikingraider47@reddit
Post it without a stamp...
192to144@reddit (OP)
I love this idea but you're right. Can't afford it.
Can't manual post easier as she has a ring doorbell.
Specialist-Web7854@reddit
Stamps? In this economy?
twofacetoo@reddit
Okay, I've had an idea for a prank for years that I never did myself because I'm not a prank guy... but if it's between friendly neighbours, I think it should be okay
Go online and buy a fleshlight, specifically one that's all silicone (some look to come in hard plastic cases, but one that's just all soft silicone, no plastic container). Once you've got it, get a bottle of mayonnaise, and squirt it into the 'opening'. Fill the thing entirely, until it's filled and dripping out the 'opening'. With it ready, run up to her, yell 'HOLD THIS!', toss it at her and run away
A person's natural instinct will be to grab whatever the thing is, meaning she'll most likely catch it and squeeze it, meaning it'll squirt out a lot of 'white goo' from it's 'opening'. At that point the assumptions take over and the prank occurs.
This might be too extreme for your case, as said I've had the idea for years and think it'd be hilarious, but I also hate pranks in general so I've never gone to the effort of actually trying it myself
donkey-oh-tea@reddit
Send her birthday / christmas cards from "Val and Dave" every year that get increasingly more passive aggressive about the fact she doesnt send them back.
CrocodileJock@reddit
My in-laws are called Val and Dave...
DiscussionOk1098@reddit
And did they attend the wedding?
Klutzy_Security_9206@reddit
Genius. Right there
donkey-oh-tea@reddit
Did it to my sister for quite a few years before coming clean. Val left Dave. Val met Sally, etc.
My sister was perplexed how both her and her husband had completely mind blanked this couple that knew so much about them & and was apparently at their wedding etc.
I really regret coming clean as it was brilliant fun
WillyPete@reddit
oxo cube inside the shower head.
NorthernblokeUK@reddit
This tiny device makes a chirping sound like a cricket at completely random intervals. They are very small and come with a sticky pad so you can easily hide them. the batteries last for years. Upon leaving my last job under a horrible manager I bought a pack of three and and hid them in various places around the building. One is hidden in a light fitting, they will never find them. All for the princely sum of £10 available on amazon and ebay ;)
JaneDont84@reddit
A singing telegram seems in the same realm as the confetti cannon. Maybe something like that?
Competitive_Test6697@reddit
Purchase 200 mini ducks. Next time you're invited to theirs, hide them all over the house.
tomgrouch@reddit
Hide 199 and tell her you hid 200
DoctorWhofan789eywim@reddit
The elite thing is to hide 49 ducks but number them 1 to 50.
tiorzol@reddit
Which number would you leave out? I'm thinking 26Â
sockhead99@reddit
42, obvs. #HGTTG
WiseMenFear@reddit
Number 9 - for the 9th birthday confetti
Novel-Case6821@reddit
Ooh good idea!
192to144@reddit (OP)
I love this!
Lovehat@reddit
Tie a string to an empty coke can, then tie it underneath their car.
Dyrenforth@reddit
If she has gnomes in the garden, you could kidnap one and send postcards from it enjoying various places
mildlydepression@reddit
Oh my god I know someone who did this at uni before they went on a trip - it went abroad to Japan, to Sweden and france, saw the restaurants and send postcards from pitstops.... I have no idea if it made it home though 🤣
GraphicDesignMonkey@reddit
My housemate took the neighbour's gnome to Thailand for 3 months. Had photos of their travels printed as he went and posted them to the neighbour as postcards.
Then when he got home we snuck the gnome back.
LayingInBracken@reddit
Ah another fan of Amélie I see!Â
Dyrenforth@reddit
Never seen it
ClimbsNFlysThings@reddit
Wholesome
192to144@reddit (OP)
No gnomes I'm afraid 😔
resident_queerdo@reddit
You could start putting gnomes in her garden.
192to144@reddit (OP)
Ah! Now this could work!
Klutzy_Security_9206@reddit
Does this help?
TW1103@reddit
Sprinkle smash on her lawn
Jayatthemoment@reddit
What happens?Â
SpudFire@reddit
Attracts badgers
weareblades@reddit
Brilliant :D
TW1103@reddit
When it rains, their garden is covered in instant mashed potato
Diddleymaz@reddit
Return the favour with the same kind of thingy.
-Po-Tay-Toes-@reddit
Hand grenade in a 5kg bag of rice. Set it off in their living room.
Bifanarama@reddit
Fill her hair dryer with glitter.
QwertyWarriorR@reddit
Fill her umbrella with hole punch outs and maybe a little bit of glitter....
Ecstatic_Effective42@reddit
Buy them a thousand piece jigsaw.
Add a piece.
MrBoggles123@reddit
We purchased my mother a plastic jigsaw for Christmas which was all clear pieces.
When ordering,.you could specify how many "spare pieces" you wanted to be put in the box!
Beginning-Annual-860@reddit
Make it a baked bean puzzle 😈😈
Ecstatic_Effective42@reddit
Steady on now.
Beginning-Annual-860@reddit
Too much? 😈😈
Ecstatic_Effective42@reddit
If I'm being entirely honest, I'm envious I didn't think of it first
Beginning-Annual-860@reddit
Team work 🫡
InternationalRide5@reddit
Buy two thousand piece jigsaws.
Mix up the pieces (apart from the edges). Give her half.
ClimbsNFlysThings@reddit
A thousand? Rookie numbers
Beginning-Annual-860@reddit
You are an evil genius
DIY_at_the_Griffs@reddit
You mean remove a piece right!?
Ecstatic_Effective42@reddit
Nope. Add one.
There was a post on Reddit not long back where someone was convinced they had an extra piece but someone pointed out they'd misplaced two other pieces.
It'll drive them nuts trying to figure out what's wrong.
Cheese_Dinosaur@reddit
This is my level of evil! 🤣
Rich_27-@reddit
Shove a cucumber through her letter box and scream "The aliens are invading"
breaded_skateboard@reddit
A leaf blower and a load of confetti cannons through her letter box.
takesthebiscuit@reddit
James Acaster has your back
🥬🥬🥬
https://youtu.be/h8X7S4j_zXA?si=ASxPz-Kne2jNEsHB
pistachioexplosion@reddit
Gelatin sheets in the toilet bowl so it sets clear. Probably she won't notice any visual difference until she poops and it's just sat there looking at her :DÂ
dan-72@reddit
Cress seeds anywhere you’ll dare them to grow & only take a few days
They will grow in carpet ;)
192to144@reddit (OP)
Aww no. I couldn't do that. Needs to be a sense of fun.
InternationalRide5@reddit
Wait until she's on holiday then plant daffodils in her lawn.
In a willy pattern.
192to144@reddit (OP)
Ooh!
Sandy_Bananas@reddit
Someone that vacuums twice daily absolutely knows what they’re doing giving you a glitter bomb.
192to144@reddit (OP)
It wasn't glitter it was confetti
North_Still_2234@reddit
Send them a card full of glitter. They'll be finding it for years
Virtuous-Patience@reddit
Wait for a similar celebration at hers. Take a bunch of party poppers, carefully open the bag, remove the bottom plug and ditch the streamers, fill the void with jam and put the pugs back in. Reseal the bag and leave on door step. Sweet, sticky, cold revenge follows… may actually damage paintwork though!
Evening-Tomatillo-47@reddit
If you can wait until she's away fill a room with ballpit balls or balloons
No_Star_7408@reddit
Send her Boomf, on her birthday, exploding confetti card/box/flower, with cupcakes, so she opens it in her kitchen. She'll love it.
DIY_at_the_Griffs@reddit
Cricket chirper
Battery powered, easily hidden…
FancyAd3942@reddit
Go classic glitter. Could send her a letter and put glitter in it😂
SkillSufficient0@reddit
Cricket noise maker if you can get inside and find a decent hiding spot. Those snaps that you drop on the floor attach them to the toilet seat. Failing that glitter bomb
El_Bastardo_Grande@reddit
Freeze some piss and shit in a baking tray and post it through her letter box.
Fizl99@reddit
When a friend of mine went on honeymoon I hid confetti at the bottom of clothes drawers, on top of curtains, in saucepans, under cutlery drawers, basically anywhere unexpected that wouldnt be destructive. They were still finding it when they moved out 10 yeara later
L-0-T-H-0-S@reddit
You want revenge for a genuinely lovely gesture made towards your son...?
PokerFriend247@reddit
Sparkly Glitter time.
AutoModerator@reddit
Please help keep AskUK welcoming!
When replying to submission/post please make genuine efforts to answer the question given. Please no jokes, judgements, etc. If a post is marked 'Serious Answers Only' you may receive a ban for violating this rule.
Don't be a dick to each other. If getting heated, just block and move on.
This is a strictly no-politics subreddit!
Please help us by reporting comments that break these rules.
I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.