Have you ever cut a group-trip short, and why?
Posted by Conscious_Page1934@reddit | AskUK | View on Reddit | 108 comments
I was chatting to my girlfriend and somehow we landed on this topic. She seemed in disbelief that someone would cut a paid-for trip, unless for emergency reasons, because I have.
For context, I had cut a group trip before with a group of friends; we had hired a car and due to tensions within the group, the driver decided to stop on the side of a motorway for a couple hours until we all apologised to him. I apologised to get home, but felt that this was a complete power trip on his behalf and booked my flight home that day. I ended up about £200 out of pocket but for me it was money well spent.
My girlfriend said she would have tried to enjoy the rest of the trip but I could not imagine pretending that the trip is salvageable at that point lol. the best thing for me would have been to leave.
Have you ever just had to leave and wrap up a trip?
Clear_Educator_3201@reddit
Yes, in 2024 we (husband, myself and two kids) left a holiday three days earlier than planned because we found the other couples on the trip were having hour long bitch rants about us after we had gone to bed (I overheard them when returning to our room from the bathroom). They were saying very nasty and personal things about us too, so remaining became untenable. We were devastated at the time because it was our kids’ first holiday abroad and had been fairly expensive for us, and we thought these people were our friends. It’s put us of going on group holidays.
OverTheCandlestik@reddit
Yeh.
We went on a big friend group trip to Whitby for 5 days in a gorgeous Airbnb, it was all quite posh and was supposed to be a few days of catching up, drinking and enjoying the sun by the sea.
Then the arguing happened between a friend and her partner which erupted into a huge shouting match and soured the mood, the sun never came out it just pissed it down, someone got violently ill so the Airbnb stunk of vomit and to top it off the Queen died.
I was utterly miserable and 3 days in so I hopped on a train and enjoyed 2 days of peace and solitude
St2Crank@reddit
Did the queen dying really affect you that much? Genuine question.
ExoticMangoz@reddit
I was shocked by that too.
OverTheCandlestik@reddit
I mean it was just funny to be utterly miserable, piss wet through, friends arguing and on the drive to robin hoods bay “the queen has died”
lemonherring@reddit
At least you weren't in Scarborough.
UntappdBeer@reddit
And Huw Edwards announced her death
Due-Employ-7886@reddit
Got a fright there, but it's fine, Elton is still going strong.
Bottled_Void@reddit
He's suffering health issues that have made him blind.
iwgruff@reddit
He's still standing though.
St2Crank@reddit
Better than he ever did to be fair.
Wild-Skin-2628@reddit
Tl;dr the Queen's death ruined your holiday
DukeofMemeborough@reddit
Did your friend stop on the hard shoulder? If so, they probably committed an offence and I wouldn’t want them driving me anywhere again. For me, that’d be enough of a reason to cut the trip short.
Outraged_Chihuahua@reddit
I went on a trip with my new-ish rescue dog and that's how I found out he hated crowds, people, noises, life. He was so stressed out that I left several days early because neither of us were having fun and he was starting to get reactive to everyone who came near him.
alfa_omega@reddit
Was he an outraged chihuahua by any chance?
Outraged_Chihuahua@reddit
He was lol. He's not THE outraged chihuahua, but he certainly was one.
showquotedtext@reddit
Not quite, but my mate and I planned to road trip in the USA for years.
He had a sort of girlfriend over there who, about 2 weeks before we were due to leave, demanded she come with us, otherwise he wasn't allowed to go.
I acquiesced, knowing she was a bit of a drama queen but it'd probably be fine.
We pick up a rental car in San Francisco, drive a couple of days down the coast towards LA and they are arguing the whole time. Completely ruining the vibe! She's sulky, he's trying to keep her happy, I'm just trying to enjoy a nice drive.
We set up at a campsite around Malibu, just north of LA. She's in their tent, my mate and I are chilling by the fire. We ask her if she wants some snacks, she mumbles "no". We let her know when we going to the toilet, she's not talking to us. We decide to wander around and find people to chat to, she doesn't respond. We go walking for 40 mins, enjoy some chats on the beach with lovely people, then head back to camp.
Girlfriend is in tears, screaming at us that she was about to call the cops she was so worried! They have a massive bust up, again, and she threatens to fly home the next day.
I chime in and say, "let me know which airport you're flying from, I'll take you there."
Next morning, bad vibes all round. She books a flight home that afternoon. We drive into LA, Have a sulky look around Hollywood, head to Venice Beach, have a sulky walk around there. My mate still trying to cheer her up the whole time. We take her to the airport, they have a cry and a hug and (thank fuck!) she goes on in.
My mate gets back in the car. "Back to Venice?"
We go back down to Venice Beach in search of someone to get us some medical marijuana. A guy in a wheelchair takes our money and disappears for an hour while we watch his beachfront stall. He comes back, we have ganja. We get rum, watch a massive sunset drum circle emerge on the beach before jumping into the car and driving off into the night, Vegas-bound.
TyphoidMurphy@reddit
Kerouac-esque.
hairybastid@reddit
Kudos to your mate for standing by you in the face of a demanding girlfriend. True "Bros before Hoes" vibes .
Gibber_jab@reddit
How was the weed?
showquotedtext@reddit
So good! Haha! Not sure what strain it was, but it certainly did the trick. In fact, first stop after getting that was Wendy's.
PureDeidBrilliant@reddit
Yeah, about twenty years ago I went to a wedding down in the Cotswolds with my then-boyfriend (don't worry: he's dead now) and I pretty much had a miserable time. I knew no one except for the boyfriend, I felt like everyone was judging me (turned out that it really was because I'm gay and Scottish) and the food was shite. I had enough after two days, told my boyfriend I was going home (he didn't believe me, the fool), got a taxi to Bristol (paid for it on his credit card) and got a train home that same day. Fuck. That.
jatmecs@reddit
Partially reminiscent of four weddings & a funeral that
PureDeidBrilliant@reddit
Well I'm not foppish enough to pull off Hugh Grant, but I will settle for Kristin Scott-Thomas. She is, after all, a goddess.
Goudinho99@reddit
Went camping with my kiddo, it got up to near 40 C and we were suffering so I just packed up to go home.
Her.mind was blown that you could do that!
wildeaboutoscar@reddit
It's an important thing to teach kids to be honest. Obviously perseverance is important, but if it's having an impact on your wellbeing it should be ok to just leave the situation. Also stops things escalating potentially.
Fuzzy_Scrump@reddit
Have also done this but at a festival. Left half way through the last day by taxi as we were booked on a shuttle the next day but were unprepared for the heat!
Delicious-Fee-6225@reddit
I leave every festival early. It’s a special power of mine. Even Glastonbury
St2Crank@reddit
Maybe you just don’t like festivals?
Delicious-Fee-6225@reddit
Or I do too many drugs and ruin them for myself.
AttentionIcy216@reddit
God brings back memories of a 36'c festival I was at for 5 days. Couldn't stay in the tent past 7:30am, barely any shade and didn't drink any booze after the first day as just need to keep hyrdated. Good times though!
phatboi23@reddit
40c outside. Be 50c in a tent. Fuck that.
I'm fine in a small tent at 5c as my sleeping bag etc will be about 10c and I like that.
If I used that tent in that heat you'd dry out overnight haha
pineapplewin@reddit
Sometimes the question is "would I be happy to spend X money to not deal with this shit?"
Conscious_Page1934@reddit (OP)
nail on the head tbh. however the follow up question is the disagreement I think. would u try to salvage a trip if ur already there or is it over?
rectal_warrior@reddit
Why didn't you just book different accommodation and enjoy the rest of the holiday without them?
Conscious_Page1934@reddit (OP)
good question. to me I think I already had a few good days so salvaging the trip would have been more effort than otherwise just ending it. also I was probably not going to enjoy a solo trip that I was mad about.
pintofendlesssummer@reddit
Could no one else drive? I would have commandeered the car and caused a mutiny.
Conscious_Page1934@reddit (OP)
I think everyone considered it very briefly but it would have probably escalated to something very ugly indeed. The driver friend was in his seat holding the wheel.
PM-ME_UR_TINY-TITS@reddit
No, but I heavily considered it. I missed my own bed and the beds there were shit with pillows about as thick as toilet paper.
AttentionIcy216@reddit
Nothing major really, we just all seemed to have checked out on the enthuasum on staying, when we had done a fair bit of the purpose of the holiday already, there were just a few days left and we we all cheap bastards.
So four of us in our mid 20s were in a tent around Snowdon (Llanberris) in early February doing a lot of hiking which was very cold naturally. Some fun challeging hikes and once daylight ended, spending it in pubs as there was heat, food, lighting and seating - We had none of that at the site the tent was pitched for, mostly due to the logistics of space in the one car we came in.
On the 6th of 8 nights the tent collapsed, snapped and ripped due to some strong weather and rain/snow. We spent the morning trying to fix it and it was deemed unsalvagable. No one wanted to buy a new tent to fit four. No one wanted to spend money on a hotel room as this was a "cheap" holiday. No one want to use the relatively comfy car we traveled up in to sleep (which at least we would of also had heating). The weather was looking to be pretty wet for the next few days which would impact the pace and routes of the hikes. We happened per chance to be talking to the owner of popular cafe in town and he offered us a room at his place to sleep for free. Nothing concerning about him but no one seemed to be willing to take him up on it.
We stood around in a car park for a while into the afternoon, not really making a useful decision, wasting the day until someone along the lines of "We don't seem to be doing much to keep us here. Shall we just go home?!". So we did, packed up and left and started a nearly 10 hour drive home.
Conscious_Page1934@reddit (OP)
yeah this seems like a healthy dynamic though. theres no tense feelings here
AttentionIcy216@reddit
Yeah thankfully, they were good and we all laugh about that day now.
While not my trip experience as I wasn't there (clashed with a festival), those same friends were part of a group of 10 guys who went on a trip around Europe for 2.5 weeks to muliple cities & countries, staying in hostels as they went. The vibe of the trip which was to go out each day and see places, eat at local places and walk around doing the usual tourist stuff and lose a good portion of a day travelling to the next city. Bit of drink in the evening but nothing crazy which for a group of 22 year olds was seen as a little strange.
I had done this kind of trip with the majority of them; through different cities, two years before (there were 7 of us then) so everyone knew what to expect from such a trip as they had been many photos and stories of the trip spread amongst those who hadn't gone. However this time 3-4 of the of the group seemed to want a completly different holiday, more static, eat fast food, sit around a pool, or a bar watching sports kind of holiday - including 1 who had been on the previous trip. I sort of saw it coming based on the size of the group and the personalities of some of those.
It apparently tanked the trip really hard at the end of the first week with arguing, sullen behaviour, miserable interactions, infighting etc on any plans to do or where to eat. It made them split into groups doing their own things as no one could agree on something they all wanted.
In the end, one of them decided to go for a solo trip for several days in a different country to get away from it (though did decide to meet back up later in the trip). The rest had a sit down and 4 of them decided it would be better if they booked the next possible flight home costing them a few hundred each. From what I heard everyone had a throughby better time once those who flew back left, but no one really wanted to talk about the tip when they got home in much detail. Eventually friendships were repaired back in the UK but no one organised a trip like it again,
Harrry-Otter@reddit
Not entirely. I still paid and used my annual leave to be there. If my travelling companions pissed me off that much, I’d just go and find another hotel and enjoy the rest of it without them.
SadSeiko@reddit
I’ve done that before
Conscious_Page1934@reddit (OP)
that was my girlfriends thought process too but I would prefer hanging out with friends though so a solo trip when im mad as hell just feels like a waste of time haha.
Respond_Sometimes@reddit
Surely you were on your own on the flight home?
Loud_Fisherman_5878@reddit
Is it reasonable to say to the group, ‘driver was a cock, I’m going on my own holiday now if anyone wants to come with?’
Conscious_Page1934@reddit (OP)
funnily enough we ended up doing smthg similar anyway. we all met up home again (minus driver) and had an impromptu long weekend holiday.
Harrry-Otter@reddit
Fair enough. I guess for me the choice would ultimately be “will I enjoy my time off work more being sat in a beach bar on holiday with a negroni in my hand, or at home?” For me, the negroni definitely wins.
BoopingBurrito@reddit
Probably also depends on where you've gone on holiday. Moving hotel and lounging at a beach bar somewhere warm and sunny? Definitely on the cards. Somewhere damp, cold, windy, without beaches, etc? Less so...
Harrry-Otter@reddit
Very true, but then I guess that raises the question of “why the fuck did I go on holiday to somewhere that’s cold, wet and windy and has nothing to do?”
LJ161@reddit
Yes - hen party planned by someone who didnt do any due diligence and gave all our money to a scammy group trip company. (Party of 17)
It was supposed to be a 4 hotel in Brighton but the hotel was a 2 in saltdeen. We paid for breakfast included but there wasnt even a kitchen in the hotel.
The spa was a nail shop next to saltdeen lido. Lido was closed. So the day long spa day and the beauty treatments we had all paid extra for were non existent.
Booked a burleque show we had tickets at the box office for - didnt have our tickets and had a full house so they were never booked.
I ended up leaving on the morning of day 2 because I had burned through all my money paying for taxis and putting money towards last minute activities.
What pissed me off the most is that she had all the info and names of the hotel etc and never once checked into it and we only realised when the mini busses pulled up at what we assumed was the wrong hotel. Had the address of the 'spa' which was the address of the nail shop etc etc.
levezvosskinnyfists7@reddit
No-one should ever have to endure a holiday in Saltdean. I really feel for you.
kestrelita@reddit
Not me, but a friend. Unfortunately she had a miscarriage the week before, and realised when she arrived that she'd made a mistake in coming - seeing everyone so cheerful (and with their own children) was just too much.
kumquat_may@reddit
Understandable
younevershouldnt@reddit
Oh gawd, poor woman
comoestasmiyamo@reddit
Camping trip with the wife. Put up all the gear as the weather came in, starting to be a real big storm, proper biblical.
We secure the tent and all the gear, get back in the car and go home to warm beds. Next day, early start and back to the tent for a little tidy up to enjoy the rest of our holiday.
CapableSong6874@reddit
It takes a while to understand that whilst the food is energy the flavour is unpleasant. Once you are free it is a gift.
terp2010@reddit
Children - the nature of all unpredictability in everything you plan as a parent. Literally anything can happen, sickness, allergies, etc.
Imreallyadonut@reddit
I didn’t get the trip cut short for the group, but I did go home early once.
Got talked into a Butlins Weekend.
I only stayed the first night, got the train home.
Not sure what I was expecting but it wasn’t that, it was all just a bit shit.
And I was too tall for the bed.
MonkeyHamlet@reddit
What did he want you to apologise for?
spik0rwill@reddit
One of my bestfriends had to cut my wedding trip (to Cyprus) short, but for a good reason. His girlfriend had miscarried. I have 0 bad feelings towards him, I would have done the same thing.
Madwife2009@reddit
Yes. Made the mistake of a boating holiday with my in-laws. Husband really wanted to go so I agreed as sometimes you have to compromise.
It was an utter disaster.
MIL's estranged father died just before the holiday and the funeral was the day we were due to check-in. Husband said that we would go and collect the boat as he didn't want to go to the funeral (he loved his grandfather but he'd had Alzheimer's so husband said that he'd already grieved and wasn't going to the funeral).
His parents turned up the following day. MIL, was, understandably unhappy and we gave her space for that. The in-laws took over the two bedroom areas, DH and I ended up in the lounge. They wanted to go to bed at 8pm. We were in our twenties and wanted to go to bed later so there was conflict there.
One of the toilets broke and, despite having insurance, they refused to call an engineer out to fix it so the whole boat smelled like a sewer for the week.
One day, DH and I went for a walk, us time, got back and realised that his parents had had a huge row. MIL decided to take control of the boat, drove it into a hedge area and a ton of spiders fell into the lounge area. Where we were sleeping. At that point, we told the in-laws that we were going home. They weren't happy but it was too much and we weren't enjoying it. Time to quit.
Dimac99@reddit
There's a tragicomic movie script in this. Although when it comes out I'll have to close my eyes for the spider bit.
Madwife2009@reddit
There was so much more . . .
My daughter did scriptwriting at uni, perhaps I'll get her to write it. She has a wicked sense of humour as well, it might work!
rachw39@reddit
Oh yes , I got the place and came straight back home!
Was friends with a girl, we met through our love of boybands, she’s very hectic and gets quite obsessed with the bands and thinks of them as her mates. I was half way there when I felt ill and honestly she was so concerned with if one of these boyband members caught my illness… not how I was, not the fact that at the time I worked with an ill child who did not need to be catching any germs. She was more concerned about me paying for my half of the hotel room ( which I was going to do anyway) because it was ok as she had other mates going….. and more concerned for a boyband member than me 😂
Got off the coach got a taxi to the train station and went home. Where I was quite ill for the next few days 🙈
EpponeeRae@reddit
This whole thread is making me want to send thank you notes to everyone I've ever travelled with for being normal reasonable people!
Conscious_Page1934@reddit (OP)
haha they are a blessing in disguise. to be honest w u I have another group of friends that I always travel with and we have literally never had an issue like this for 10+ yrs. we could tense up sometimes but genuinely never even close to this level.
bullette1610@reddit
Yep, drove abroad in my mates car for a holiday. Turns out he was a fucking awful driver and then later refused to pull over when there was an issue with the car that made it impossible to drive safely. I booked myself on a flight home because I never wanted to get into a car with him again. Not spoken to him since.
Conscious_Page1934@reddit (OP)
yh unsafe driving is a straight red flag and warrants cancellation for sure.
t-costello@reddit
We scrapped a stag do the night before the flight because the grooms father selfishly chose to die
Conscious_Page1934@reddit (OP)
tbf I would classify that as an emergency. there's literally no better alternative here, and id wager everyone felt like it was the right thing to do.
BigBaboonButt5@reddit
Did this exact thing last year. Small group of us (males in our 50s) went camping in Lake District - we hadn’t all been together for 20 odd years. One of the party was being a bit of a d!ck (too much alcohol) and became verbally abusive towards some of the others. We all knew from previous experience that with one false move this could quickly escalate into something physical and the whole evening became really tense.
In the middle of the night I wondered, “I’m in my fifties - I’m too old for this. Why the hell am I doing here putting up with this?” I gave myself until lunchtime the next day to make sure any alcohol was out of my system then just got into my car and drove home. I didn’t even tell anyone I was leaving. I was just done with the whole thing. Apparently a few others had the same idea and left shortly after I did.
Haven’t been in contact with many of them since and I don’t miss them or their drama one bit.
Conscious_Page1934@reddit (OP)
yeah man this was kind of my attitude towards the situation too. things like this can easily escalate and I would just prefer to wrap it up and exit the situation ASAP. also having these issues in your 50s seem very tragic, I wouldve thought things get a lot chiller by then.
EyeAware3519@reddit
No because I don't go on trips with dickheads.
Nervous-Economy8119@reddit
Unfortunately your mates can’t say the same.
Diplomatic_Gunboats@reddit
To be fair, lots of people only see each other on their best behavior. Having to spend all day every day with someone can change your opinion somewhat.
Smeeble09@reddit
Had a group trip with two other couples.
One couple were complete and utter twats, so we left late that night. Only later on did I find out the extent of the issue, as my wife knew I would have punched the bloke if I'd known.
GeggingIn@reddit
Went on a hen where tensions were high from the start and culminated in the bride’s cousin going after her nemesis with a broken bottle.
Felt bad, but my pal and I thought fuck this and left a day early.
TheRadishBros@reddit
Jesus
Diplomatic_Gunboats@reddit
Thats the entertainment for the night sorted though surely?
GeggingIn@reddit
By Christ, she was angry.
The worst part is because of all the madness we didn’t get any food.
Diplomatic_Gunboats@reddit
Maybe I just come from a rougher background, but thats like average wedding party vibes in my family :D
What was the cause of the nemesis-label? Did said nemesis have an attempt on the cousins love interest or something similar?
GeggingIn@reddit
No, lot of our family are pretty much like that too.
Think it was something to do with money owed from ages ago.
Crystalline_E@reddit
Corners and Doors Kid
sneddsdead@reddit
He stopped for 2hrs! How did you not all drag him out, batter him and leave him there? I think I'd of gone home as well, do you still see this friend?
Brokella@reddit
Yes! Couldn’t bear the women I was with for another moment. Left two days early, got a ferry to the wrong place accidentally (couldn’t speak the language! lol ), had an absolutely super two days on my own and found a small hotel to stay in. Made it back for the flight no problem. Definitely did the right thing. :)
TelephoneOrnery1394@reddit
Were you sitting next to each other on the plane?
Brokella@reddit
No thank God! I had a separate flight because I was always going back home alone as others were staying different times. Would have been…….interesting if I’d flown back with them!
Which-World-6533@reddit
Seems a bit diva-ish to stop the trip early.
Once went on holiday with a couple of mates. About a third of the way one mate started getting smashed all day everyday. He wasn't being a nice drunk either.
In the end we had to have a good talking with him as he was getting everyone down. First day or so was touch and go but towards the end it was fun time.
SteamerTheBeemer@reddit
Yeah I mean unless the argument was about something very serious then I don’t get why OP didn’t just apologise to driver for distracting him probably and make up with mates.
He said he felt the driver was power tripping but it kinda sounds like he was the one power tripping by somewhat ruining the holiday by leaving over what was probably a silly argument.
kittyvixxmwah@reddit
In your case, probably depends why the driver decided to pull over in the first place.
Important context missing here.
Conscious_Page1934@reddit (OP)
tbh with you the argument was incredibly petty so I didn't explain the whole story.
basically the driver was upset that we didn't all chip in equally in terms of planning the itinerary. However, we explained that we actually don't care much about where we do go since we're just satisfied that we are on a holiday to start off with and the place we were in was wonderful all around (think quaint European village).
We did have an itinerary but he wanted to express that he felt it was not fair we did not plan as much as him.
kittyvixxmwah@reddit
Fair enough, he was being a dick then.
ramapyjamadingdong@reddit
I went back packing with a friend when I was 18. The trip was 40 days all told and after about 15 I was ready to explode. It culminated in him trying to lock me in one night rather than going to explore the city we were in. We had a row and I left him in the hostel and had 2 whole countries between by breakfast so I could enjoy the next 23 days by myself. We met up 2 days before the end of the trip as had booked a hostel together, then flew back in stony silence thereafter.
Significant-Leek7923@reddit
Went away for Christmas with the family and had enough of my Dad after two days. Left on boxing day saying we had to feed the cat.
Mezcalico@reddit
I’ve been on group trips with arguments, usually you just separate for a few hours and do something else until everyone cools off.
If it was bad enough I think I’d probably continue the trip solo rather than cut it short.
Bus8082@reddit
I did this on a holiday with my sister. Thought I was being stubborn about wanting to do activity X not Y. In reality I simply needed time alone from her but she still didn’t get it!
The rest of the holiday was awkward. Our relationship has been shit since because I realised how actually horrible she is to me. Even now I still struggle to say no to her.
Dutch_Slim@reddit
Group trips yes, but only days out. Once it gets fractious between others, I’m out of there.
Husband and I have cut a few holidays short, we usually caravan and sometimes we’ve just had enough and want our home comforts!
DogtasticLife@reddit
I did years ago because the girl organising lied about sleeping arrangements & I found myself left with a barely long enough bench around the eating area in the double wide caravan, left for a bnb and went home next day.
Tall_Stick5608@reddit
When I was younger I would holiday with friends, road trip or even trips abroad. Those experiences even though I went through with them at the time i soon learnt I can’t travel in a group. I now have friends all over the world who I meet when I travel to their cities but never would I travel with friends. My current travel situation is 60% solo 35% with my girlfriend and 5% with family.
littletorreira@reddit
Not cut short but I did get a train home instead of driving with the friend who took me because she had behaved so poorly on the weekend away. I was prepared to get the lift back but then she and the otters decided we would go to a castle and spend a future 4/5 hours together before driving back and the thought of it was too much. So another friend dropped me at the station and I spent an extra £100 to just go home in peace.
Savvymundo@reddit
Those bloody otters. Can't be trusted.
Violet351@reddit
My ex husband wouldn’t go where I wanted to go because it was too small, then picked a caravan site in the middle of nowhere and then it pissed down with rain and the weather report said it wasn’t going to improve for the last two days so we just went home
Conscious_Page1934@reddit (OP)
sometimes you just have to call it a day tbf.
Violet351@reddit
The one nice day we went to tintagel castle but the rest was just awful
L-0-T-H-0-S@reddit
I've done that with paid jobs, even though it hurt to do it. Yes. Never done it on a paid-for trip, but I get the unsalvageable aspect of what you're saying - if a group commitment turns out to just be one persons pesonal power trip, absolutely.
I'd walk.
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